Disclaimer: I don't own Artemis Fowl. If i did, it would be a romatic comedy like my fic! (And there would be more 'Trouble Kelp Moments'.)
A/N: Hope you enjoy!
Monkie
Artemis's heart was beating fast, was he just actually committing these crimes to get Holly's attention on him, to see her face again? Preposterous! Don't take anything Juliet says seriously, it will only cause your mind to play tricks on you! Like just now… Think Artemis! Why not try to behave like those crazy American teenagers, always bashing each others heads with anything within their reach, and doing thing such as stick suction cups onto their feet, and try to climb up walls just to be like Spiderman, or any other fictional character for that matter. Think like one Artemis, think! Hey, wouldn't it be cool if I tried to make a laser gun out of some rubber bands? I would be like ZOOOM, and he would be like KASPLAT! Then we would like scream, loud, like AHHHHH, and then we would be like laughing at each other and we would all be like HAHAHAHAHAHA! Then we would be like in trouble, and then I would ditch my old folks to hang out with my homies.
I should warn myself next time I zone out and think such crazy things! I'm already thinking of a next time, that's no good, well I could overcome my shock by thinking positive thoughts. Money, fortune, money, me, money, money, money, leaving St. Bartleby's School for Young Gentlemen, money… until his thoughts were interrupted by Juliet. "Hey Arty-Sweetie"
"Juliet, don't call me that"
"What's the matter? Something I said troubling you"
"Would it concern you"
"Of course Arty-Sweetie! Your problems are mine"
"Didn't Butler tell you not to annoy me"
"What is this, 20 questions"
"So what if it is"
"I know what would cheer you up! Let's watch your baby videos"
"No thanks, I can't stand watching Butler like a num-chuck anymore or me pooing or whatever"
"Awww… Still afraid that Holly would reject you"
Artemis's eyes began to flare, and his cheeks turned pink. "GET OUT OF MY ROOM! I DON"T CARE FOR HER OR WHAT THE HELL SHE IS DOING!" Artemis threw a book at Juliet, who managed to shut the door fast enough. "I'm sure you are thinking of her naked in a shower right now!" Juliet yelled.
"AM NOT!" Artemis yelled back throwing another text book at her, and failed again. After a few minutes, he'd hate to admit it, but Juliet was right, he was thinking of Holly naked in a shower, and it wasn't the first time either.
Butler entered the manor with a bag full of groceries, and magazines, when he heard Artemis scream, "AM NOT!" "Juliet," Butler moaned. Juliet was walking down the stairs giggling, until she saw Butler, she turned so many shades of white.
"What did you do this time?" Butler asked feeling like it was the hundredth time he said that. "Hey, only laying the facts on the table for him." she said ever so coolly.
"Didn't I warn you not to do that"
"Oppsies"
"Oppsies indeed."
Yeah... I'm still learning how to use so don't yell at me! Plz R&R!