Chapter 4
Over the next two days Bam's condition had improved. He was stronger and his appearance was less frail looking. He even was able to smile a little bit every once in a while, and sit up all the way without getting too tired. Even with these improvements, he still wasn't well enough to completely rule out a death sentence.
The nurse peeked her head into the room with a bright smile directed at Bam.
"Bam you have a surprise out here. You up for it?" She asked cheerfully.
"Uh…yeah sure. Bring it in."
She stepped out into the hall and then came back in, followed by Jess and Kelly.
Jess held something bundled up in a white blanket in his arms. Bam knew right away what it was before Jess showed it to him.
"Bam this is your niece." Kelly said with a grin.
"You want to hold her?"
Bam looked up at Jess, taken aback, then looked at the nurse.
"Do you think it's alright?"
"Oh sure. It will be fine."
"It's not like cancer is contagious, and you're strong enough now." Jess said as he handed the baby to Bam.
Bam held the baby and smiled in wonder. There was even a sparkle in his eyes that wasn't there for a long time.
"Wow. She's beautiful. What did you name her?"
Kelly and Jess looked at each other, then at Bam with matching grins.
"We named her Branda Colelene Margera… after you."
Bam was stunned and his mouth fell open as he looked at his niece. "Oh." He half frowned as he turned his eyes to his brother, but the sparkle still remained. "Why'd you name her after me?"
"You don't like that we did?"
"Well… I do. I'm flattered but… why?"
"It's just… When mom and dad first saw her, they said how much she looks like you did when you were born."
"Really?"
"Yeah. And mom had a picture of you; taken the day you were born, in her purse. She held it up to Branda and the resemblance is uncanny."
"Wait. You mean I looked like a girl when I was a baby?" He half groaned.
"From what I saw in the picture, Bam, you were quite a beautiful baby." Kelly laughed.
Bam looked down and some color appeared on his cheeks as he grinned.
"Shut up." He glanced back up at them.
"Thanks for bringing her to me. This… this is nice." He smiled softly.
"Well did you think we weren't going to have you see her?" Jess laughed.
Kelly reached down and picked the baby out of Bam's arms.
"Ok. I should be getting her back to the nursery now. Say bye-bye to Uncle Bam, Branda."
"Bye Branda. Thanks for stopping by." Bam said with the return of his natural laugh in his voice.
Jess stayed behind with Bam as Kelly walked out of the room.
"So I bet that just made your day, didn't it?"
"Yeah it did actually." He sighed and gazed at the now closed door. "I can't do it now. Not after that."
"Do what?"
He looked at Jess and smiled.
"Die. I mean I have to be around to watch that little girl grow up. Someone's got to show her how to skateboard when she's old enough to learn. Who else is that going to be?'
Jess laughed. "Not you."
"Why not?"
"Not the way you are! There's no way I'm going to let my daughter near a skateboard, especially with you as her teacher. You'll destroy her."
"Oh come on! It's not like I would be having her do all kinds of crazy stunts like I do. I'd just show her the basics and she'll take it from there."
"But Bam. How can she learn how to skateboard when she's going to be busy learning how to play the drums?" They both laughed.
Jess patted Bam on the shoulder. "I'm glad to see that you're feeling better."
"Yeah I am. Thanks to you."
"You're welcome then. Glad that I could help."
When Bam first came home from the hospital he had a non-stop smile across his lips. It wasn't a very broad smile, but it was noticeable nonetheless.
Even though he was much better than he was while in the hospital, he was still sick. He was going to have to remain on straight oxygen for a while, and because of that he wasn't able to do as much as he wanted to do. This alone was enough to depress him.
The only thing that cheered him up was when he got to visit with his niece.
Sure Branda wasn't very big, and all she could do was lie there and stare, but Bam loved every second she was around.
His smile grew brighter every time he saw her, and faded slightly when she left his sight. She was the only thing that made him forget about being sick.
But the reminders of his cancer came back when they weren't together.
Bam was starting to feel stir crazy from lack of activity. Having to drag the oxygen tank with him where he went was tiring enough.
He wanted so much to get back on his skateboard like he did before he was sick, but he felt a restraint caused by the tube beneath his nose. He was feeling a whole lot stronger but his strength did no good if he couldn't use it.
He sighed heavily as he sank into his chair. Almost everything lately was getting him down and he didn't know what to do about it. He just wanted a way out of his slump so he could go back to being his old self.
He looked down at the plastic tube and let it rest in-between his fingers loosely. This was too depressing for him because it made him feel like an feeble ninety-year-old man.
All that was missing was a walker and a set of dentures. He closed his eyes and groaned in frustration. Then before he could think it through clearly, he reached down toward the tank and turned it off. He pulled the tube out of his nose and sat it neatly on the tank.
At first, much to his surprise, he was able to breathe just fine. It actually took a while before he had to start taking deeper breaths.
The lack of oxygen was causing his eyes to become droopy and hard to keep open. It was becoming harder for him to breathe but he couldn't think of anything that could help it.
"Bam!" Cried Jenn as she rushed to his side.
"Jenn…" He gasped.
She picked up the tube and attached it to Bam, then turned the tank back on.
"What the hell were you thinking!" She yelled as Bam began to catch his breath. "You were doing so well lately. Why on earth would you want to kill yourself?"
"I… I wasn't…" He wheezed. "I just wanted…." He took a deep breath and held it in for a couple seconds.
"Then what were you doing if you weren't trying to kill yourself?"
"I… I don't know. I wasn't thinking. I guess…" He paused to search for the right words.
"I guess I just wanted to… to be able to do things like I used to… I didn't know what I was doing… I'm sorry."
"It's ok." She gave him a hug then grabbed the sides of his face. "Don't scare me like that any more! Alright?"
"Alright. I'm sorry. I just… I feel so stupid." He leaned forward and placed his chin on her shoulder, while holding his arms around her back.
"Do me a favor, Jenn, and please don't tell any one about this. I'm the biggest idiot right now and they don't need to know that."
"I think it's a little late for that. Everyone already knows how much of an idiot you are."
"Gee thanks for kicking me when I'm down. I really needed that." He said with a sarcastic chuckle.
"I know Bam. I know."
"I just want this to be over. Can't stand being sick for so long. When am I going to be better?"
"It's hard telling, you know that. And you know what? I think you've done well during all of this." She pulled away and looked him in the eyes. "I don't think I could have handled it as good as you have if it were me in your shoes."
"You really think I've handled this well? Jenn this cancer has been hell on me. I look and feel like shit. Just when I think I'm getting better, it knocks me down hard. This last time I was in the hospital, I was so close to dying. Before I was released the doctor said that it is a real wonder how I made it. I should have died Jenn. To be honest the only thing that made me fight it this time was Branda. I had to live once I saw her."
"Where are you going with all of this?'
"I… I don't know. I thought I had a point I was trying to make when I started but… I guess I didn't after all. My brain's still trying to recuperate after the lack of oxygen I guess. But everything I said just then is true." he said with a sad smile.
"Bam I don't believe that Branda was your only reason for surviving."
"I haven't survived yet, Jenn. But… you're right, in a way. When I first held her, it made me feel so good. Every time I'm around her I feel like… I don't know like I can get away with anything. When I see her I just start to…" He shook his head. "No this is silly."
"No, what is it?"
"I start to picture if she was our daughter. I guess I wanted to live so… so we could have kids of our own someday. Well someday, hopefully, soon."
"Bam you really mean it?" Her eyes brightened.
"Yeah. I just hope that after this cancer is gone, I'll be able to have kids… and if I am I want us to try for one."
Her eyes welled with tears of joy as she took in the words Bam had said. She moved in close to him and gave him a long, firm kiss.
"I love you" She said, pulling away from him.
"I love you too. I-I'm going to make it. I have to."
"I know you are."
They brought each other into a strong embrace, and just sat there for a while, doing nothing but hold each other and smile.
Chapter 5
It had been a few months since Bam had his last hospital stay. During those months he was bound and determined to fight his cancer with every ounce of strength he had. He was taken off the oxygen sooner than his doctor had expected, and his physical appearance had improved a great deal.
He no longer looked or felt weak and fragile, and he was acting more and more like his old self everyday. His hair, though still pretty short, had grown almost completely back in, but he didn't let that bother him.
"Ok we're done."
"That's it?" bam asked with a surprised smile as he sat up and buttoned his shirt.
"These check ups are getting shorter and shorter."
"Don't be surprised if this is the last one. At least for a while. But before you go, I'd like one small blood sample just to make sure."
"Do I have to? I hate these things."
"It'll only take a minute, then you can go."
Bam held his arm out and made a fist as the doctor prepared the vein for the needle. He closed his eyes and turned his head away as he felt the needle penetrate his skin.
"With all the tattoos I've got, you'd think I'd be used to needles by now." He said while trying to laugh it off.
"Ok. I'll give you the results of the test in a day or two." Said the doctor as he placed the bandage over the cotton ball on Bam's arm.
"Great."
He looked over at the doctor and could feel himself about to turn green as he saw the vial that held his blood. He had to sit on the examining table a few seconds longer before hopping down. Normally the sight of blood, even his own, didn't make him feel sick, but some reason it did this time.
He decided that putting his sunglasses would shield him from the red liquid and take the sick feeling away from him.
"Are you alright Bam?"
"Yeah I'm fine. Just needed a minute after the blood sample." He stood up slowly with a grin towards the doctor. "Well take care, doc."
"Have a nice day Bam. Tell your family I said hello, ok?"
"Ok sure thing."
Bam walked out of the doctor's office with a broad smile all the way to his Hummer. Jenn had been sitting in the passenger seat waiting for him.
"Well?" She asked as he started the engine.
"Well what?" he laughed, unable to keep from smiling.
"How did the check up go?"
"Just a normal check up."
"That's not how it seems judging by that big ass smile of yours."
"Oh uh… It was good. Everything looks good."
"What did he tell you?"
"He said have a nice day."
"No! What else did he tell you?"
"He said to tell my family he says hello."
"Bam!" She said, following a back handed slap on Bam's arm.
"Ow! Watch it I just had a blood test."
"Sorry. What did the doctor tell you? How's the cancer
look?"
"What cancer?"
"What do you mean what… he told you, you… there's no." She stammered.
"Calm down. He was looking at my x-rays and everything was clear. He took a blood sample just to be sure. Let's not get to excited yet."
"Yeah but more than likely the cancer's gone, right?"
"As far as we know, yes. But we still have to see how this sample turns out." He reached down and squeezed Jenn's hand.
Waiting for the doctor to give him the results was both exciting and difficult for him. He wanted to know, and he wanted to know now, but he didn't want to get any one's hopes up so he didn't mention it to them.
As hard as it was for him, he kept it to himself somehow. He set it up to where all of his friends and his family would be around, when he was expecting the call from his doctor, just as he could tell them all at the same time.
He told everyone at once when he found out that he had cancer, and he wanted to tell them the same time way when he found out it was gone.
Bam walked up to Jenn after talking to the doctor, and smiled.
"Well?" She asked.
"Just help me gather everyone up."
Everyone, once rounded up, took their places in the living room and awaited the news.
"Guys, I just talked to the doctor. You know that I just had a check up the other day and… well… going by my x-rays, he said that everything looked fine but he needed a blood sample just to be sure." He looked at Jenn, who stood by his side, then back at everyone else.
" He just told me the results of the blood test. He says I have a clean bill of health… and completely cancer free." He finished, trying to hold back his gleeful tears.
"Oh thank God Bam!" Phil said as he stood up. He gave his son a hug and took a step back with a big smile.
"I had a lot of faith in you. I knew you were going to beat this thing."
"I'm so proud of you, Bam." Said April, joining Phil's side. She too gave Bam a hug, but hers was firm and lasted longer.
"I finally have my little boy back!"
"Ape don't do that!" He chuckled as he tried not to blush.
One by one, everyone else walked up to Bam to give their congratulations. After it was just Bam and Jenn in the room, the couple turned to each other for a kiss. They swayed as they stood there in each other's arms.
"It's been quite a ride, hasn't it?" She asked.
"It sure has. I'm just glad it's officially all over." He looked her in the eyes. "So… remember what I said to you a few months ago?"
"Not really. I mean you probably said a lot of things. What are you talking about?'
"Well when we were talking about Branda, and how she helped me… well make sure that I survived this."
"Yeah… oh you mean?"
"I've been thinking about it a lot lately, and well… I still would like to try for a baby of our own. That is, if you want to."
"Bam. Do you know what you're saying? Is this really what you want?"
"Yeah. I want to have a baby with you. Now that I'm back to good health I think it would be a good time to start trying… only if you want to." He said with pleading, through smiling eyes, causing here to look away with a blush.
"Why do you always do this to me Brandon Margera?"
"Well what do you say? You want to have a baby with me or not?"
"Oh my God, Bam you're really serious about this." She bit her lip before giving him a nice, slow kiss. As she pulled away, she gazed deeply into his eyes. "Yes. Yes let's have a baby."
"Jenn… Jenn…" He spoke in between kisses. "This makes me so happy." He stopped and laughed. "We are going to make horrible parents, you know that?"
"You, maybe, but not me." She teased. "This will be good for us."
"Yes it will."
The two of them turned and started going into the next room.
"So… when do we start trying?" He asked, before getting a playful hit in the arm and punched away from Jenn.
"What?"
"In due time, Bam. In due time."