Chapter 8: Ok, Umm, That Was Strange

When Stephi got out of the car in front of Jill's house all she saw was Tedder sprawled out in Jill's yard. Even though she didn't know where Jill was, the fact that Cheds was there meant that Jill had to be. Silk-a-Silk (Stephi's other nickname) waved to her mom, who then drove off. Silk-aSilk turned and approached the Chedward in the Jill's yard.

"Tedder, where's Jill?"

"I think… I don't know. I forget."

"Do you have any idea at all?"

"I think they might have gone to the woods."

"Okay, where are the woods?"

"Somewhere off in that direction." (Vague hand gesture)

"Tedder, just get up and show me."

"Oh, fine," Tedder grumbled as she got to her feet. "The woods are right down there. They're probably at the Rock Bridge. It's right inside, so you can't possibly miss it unless you're really retarded ("like you"). If they're not at the Rock Bridge, they're at the bike jumps. Just cross the bridge, turn right, and follow the trail until see the giant mounds of dirt. Tell Jill I said bye."

"You're not coming?"

"Are you insane? I'm going home so I can be lazy sitting under my tree. See you later."

Silk-a-Silk watched Tedder get on her bike and ride slowly away. Then Silk-a-Silk, who had absolutely no confidence whatsoever in Tedder's directions, turned and went down into the woods.

She found the Rock Bridge easily enough. It was right there, just like Chedward had said, but Jill wasn't there. There was a trail off to the right across the stream, and Silk-a-Silk decided that she might as well try. However, right in the middle of crossing the bridge, she stopped. There was a group of people coming in her direction, following the path. As she looked closer, she recognized some of them, their voices as well.

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It was quiet. There was no movement in the dark clearing of the forest. Calm and cool, it was peaceful, yet somehow eerie.

Suddenly, the air in the center of the clearing seemed to waver, then darken. A figure stepped out of the blackness, and the hole closed behind it. The strange figure looked around, then began walking confidently, as if it were following some silent instructions.

Once again, the clearing was still.

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Cow. What kind of cow? Moo Cow. Hehe. Sorry about this, at least to those of you who aren't, well, uh, aren't, umm, Stephi. I know how much she wants to read about meeting Silk, so I felt the need to make her suffer. Plus, I'm having a blah day, and my inspiration is stretched a little thin. Oh, well.

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Jessica Tedder stopped her bike and dropped it in the front yard. She briefly considered going inside to get a drink before deciding that she was too lazy. She flopped down underneath her tree and watched the little people play.

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The fog was thick. It lay over everything like a blanket, making everything look hazy and muffling any sound that might have been made.

The lone building appeared to be dark and silent, but that was only on the outside. Inside, there was something at once terrible and awesome. Frightening, yet fascinating. It was the stuff of Adrienne's nightmares. That's right. Inside, past the thick fog and silent exterior, there was… a Mexican Fiesta!

There was music. There was dancing. There was a very strange, very short blonde wearing a serape and a sombrero over a pair of jeans and a black t-shirt, who was dancing around and holding up signs that signified the passing of time ("2 Days Later" for example). Perhaps the strangest thing of all were the three Supreme Court Justices, two guys and one girl, who were dancing and randomly head-banging in time to the music, and, yes, they were all wearing their official black Supreme Court robes (though strangely they seemed to be more like cloaks and capes belonging to Halloween costumes). Even stranger was the fact that these Justices looked like teenagers. In fact, one of them looked exactly like the aforementioned blonde, who was now nowhere to be seen.

Other than that, there was nothing else wrong here. After all, there's absolutely nothing unusual about large groups of people getting together and having a fiesta in the middle of nowhere, inside a seemingly empty building.

One song, a bolero, had just ended (for those of you who are retards and don't play Zelda, or who don't own the Versus Books version of the Zelda cheatbook, a bolero is a lively Spanish dance in triple meter). As the new song started, two of the Justices (the guys) decided to start a conga-line. The other Justice was missing, but the strange, small blonde with the serape and sombrero was on the other side of the room dancing around with a large group of fellow partiers.

Just as they were about to start up the mechanical bull, one of the men came into the room carrying a large tray of nachos, bringing a cheer from the gathered crowd.

Much as I'd like to stay here and describe the rest of this Mexican Fiesta, I'm afraid I can't. You see, if I were to stay here in this extremely fun environment, I could go on forever about it (and believe me, I probably would). So, yet again and somewhat regretfully, back to your cheese.

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Makova! I just met a dude named Makova! And suddenly that name will never be the same to me. Makova! Pay him lots and he'll do what you're saying. Pay him little and he'll go back to praying. Makova. I'll never stop paying Makova!

(Okay, so I lied)

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The voice echoed down the empty hallway. The owner of the voice stood outside of a room that was full people sitting at desks, watching. One of the people in the room opened the door, and those inside could now hear the exact words of the song.

"Here's to Mother Russia

While you sleep in bed

We will conquer space

And all you see is Red!"

It was sung in a Russian accent (duh) by a very strange, very small blonde. Those who had opened the door pretended to arrest her.

Some months later, the same blonde and group who had "arrested" her were all sitting together in that very same room singing a very different song (with no accent whatsoever).

"Now, now, now Chambon, you know what they say

We do not want a pop quiz today

We do not want one, why can't you see?

We do not want it 'cause you killed a tree."

They then proceeded on to the next song.

"Hey, now Chambon, why'd you kill that tree?

You're meaner than Mille, hey

Why'd you kill that tree?"

(I'm certain that some of you are so dumb that you have absolutely no clue who the aforementioned people in the last 3 sections are, but, well, you should! The signs are everywhere, pointing right at the oh-so-obvious answer, but for those of you who truly are complete idiots… I'm not telling! Ha! Did you really think that I'd take the time to explain the self-explanatory to losers like you? You idiots! By the way, I only know one kid from Russia, and she doesn't have an accent at all. And no, I'm not from Russia at all, I was born and bred here in the good old USA just like the past 4 or 5 generations of my family, nor do I have any Russian or Hispanic in my background whatsoever. I'm of 100 percentpureblooded German heritage, and I just happen to be really good at changing the way I speak so it sounds like I have an accent. Any accent.)

(Yes, I know that I just ended one set of parentheses, but this one has a completely different subject, so here it is: By now you should have picked up on the fact that I tend to be more than just a bit random, and indeed, by now you should even expect it. Also, as I'm sure you've noticed by this point in time, I'm not exactly what you would call normal. I'm anything but normal. Insane serves the purpose as well as anything else, but isn't entirely accurate. I think we can just settle on I'm rather strange, so let's leave it at that. Anyways, cow says moo, moo says cow, and all the elves go party.)