DEATH TO MR. FISHY!
Ep something of the FF7 MORONS!
In this story, Cloud, Cid and Vincent are trying to get past the fish that takes you into the forgotten capital where Aeris dies. They think they can resurrect her. This is after the game. Comedy. )
Cloud and Vincent stood, staring at their greatest enemy. A vein pulsed on Clouds forehead and a dangerous gleam showed in his eyes. Showing an uncharacteristic amount of fear, Vincent took a small step back.
Cloud: YOU STUPID FISH! I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL CHOP YOU INTO LITTLE FISH STICKS!
Cloud leapt forward, cutting the fish exactly 14, then jumping up in the air and doing a braver-style cut. Then, he dropped his absurdly large sword and cowered in a corner as a shower of bullets slammed into the demonic clownfish.
Cloud: What the heck, Vincent? You could've hurt me!
Vincent: Oh, stop whining. You nearly killed me that time at Nibelhiem anyway.
Cloud: That was different! You were-- looks around Hey. Where's Cid?
Vincent: Who knows? You never know with him.
Just as Vincent said this timeless truth, a kamikaze style scream issued from above where…you guessed it…Cid was flying down at the fish, looking really cool, and nearly hitting Cloud.
Cloud: #!
Cid: YEAH! TAKE THAT YOU LITTLE #! FISH! THAT FELT GOOD!
Vincent: rolls eyes
Cid: Hey, Cloud. What're you doing on the floor?
Vincent: Clueless.
Cid: What? What?
Vincent: Nevermind.
Cloud: FYI, I was- he is interrupted at the beginning of a cross-dresser's temper tantrum when he is cut off by a loud scream
Cid: What the #! was that?
Vincent: I dunno. I really don't care. shoots the fish some more
Cloud: Vincent, ITS NOT WORKING! I DID MY BEST MOVE AND THE THING HASN"T BEEN SCRATCHED!
Vincent: So?
Cloud: Nevermind. I'm gonna go see what that noise was. trips as he runs off. His face turns red as Cid falls over laughing
Cid: HAHAHHAHAHAH! starts crying from his hysterics
Cloud: pegs him with a rock SHUT UP! Runs off, almost tripping again
Vincent: Maybe we should go help him…
Cid: still laughing HAHA… gasps for breath Sure..just as soon….as I…..can stand… collapses, still laughing
Vincent: I'm surrounded by morons…not that the Turks were any better…. walks off
As Cid is rolling around on the floor, Mr. Fishy disappears. Standing, he walks over to it, but as he bends over to look down the hole, another fit of laughter hits him, and he falls in.
Cid: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! looks down oh, crap…HA!
Cloud and Vincent walk up, just in time to hear Cid's stream of expleteives as he drags himself out of the water onto the little altar thingy.
Cid: Hey guys… I found it…HAHAHAHA! falls in the water
Vincent levitated down, and Cloud runs up to the hole and trips and falls in.
Cloud:AHHHHHH!
Vincent: Moron….
Cloud splashes into the water on top of Cid just as he hits the surface.
Cid: WHAT THE…..goes underglub glub glub..
Cloud hits the bottom and jumps up to the altar, where Vincent is standing. Just as Cloud starts to say something, a loud squeak is heard and Mr. Fishy reappears, locking them in. Cid drags himself up, laughing and cussing.
Cid: HAHAHA#$$
Cloud: Okay, we'll bring her back…wheres the materia…pats pocket Here it is!
Vincent: That's Restore.
Cloud…This one?
Cid: Destruct
Cloud…This one?
Vincent: The Black materia…What the heck do you have that one for?
Cloud: It's a souveneir…This one?
Cid: WHAT? You said you didn't have Knights of the Round yet!
Cloud: Sorry…sheesh…This one?
Vincent: Finally! Oh, wait…. no, that's Lightning.
Cloud: This one?
Cid: CLOUD? HOW DO YOU MISTAKE ULTIMA FOR REVIVE?
Cloud: Shut up. This one?
Vincent: YES! THANK GOD!
Cloud: Okay…Now we hook it up to the monitor…attach the cell phone…
Cid: Are you sure you're doing this right?
Cloud looks at directions that say HOW TO CONNECT YOUR CELL PHONE TO YOUR COMPUTER yeah…it says right here…see?
Cid: Oh. You're right…
Vincent: Give me that! snatches materia
Cloud:oh, yeah, like you can do it.
Vincent: says something in Latin Okay. Now we should be able to bring her back. Cloud? Go ahead.
Cloud: Aeris, hear us. Plaese come back to the Earth, because I really loved you, and we went on a date, and goes on for 5 minutes and that's why you should come back.
(WARNING! ADVENT CHILDREN SPOILER!)
Vincent: The fact that Sephiroth is gonna come back in the movie doesn't have anything to do with it, does it?
(OKAY! ITS SAFE TO READ AGAIN!)
Cloud:That too.
Cid: Why wasn't I informed of this?
Cloud: Because you fell asleep at the meeting.
Cid: Oh.
Aeris: Who has been standing on the edge of the altar since Cloud did his speech Gee, this looks like fun. What did I miss?
Cloud: AERIS! runs over to her I could feel it the moment you came back.
Aeris: More like 5 minutes after…but who's complaining? I love, you Cloud, and I should've told you that before now.
Cloud: I love you too. loooooong, romantic kiss.
Cid: So, Vincent, how are we getting out?
Vincent: Who knows… I'm goin to sleep. whips out his fold-up coffin, unfolds it and is soon snoozing. 2 minutes later, Cloud and Aeris are finally getting short on breath. Cid is asleep.
THE END…..FOR NOW…
