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Kaidan had been making his way across Horizon since the initial attack, in a desperate hope that if he could reach the towers' base, he could achieve what he had not managed to do the entire time he'd been on Horizon—get the targeting system online.

Why he, seemingly alone amongst the entire colony, was able to shake off the effects of the swarm, he didn't know. He was paralyzed every time one touched him, but only for a few moments, and then it wore off. In the brief respites he had between swarm attacks and fighting whatever the things were that were taking the people away, he theorized that maybe it was his biotics. But it didn't matter. He couldn't stop the things from coming for the colonists, much as he had tried. The best thing he could do was try to attack the ship. He had to get to those towers.

Eventually it became clear that someone else was on the move through the colony, as well. He could hear gunfire in the distance, and fewer of the things were around, the people left standing there immobile but otherwise unharmed.

And whoever it was managed to get the targeting system online, the towers coming to life and attacking the ship until it took off. Kaidan couldn't think about the people still on board the ship. He had to think about the ones who were here, the ones who had been saved. No one had been saved from any of the colonies before. He had to thank this mysterious benefactor.

The rumors he'd heard on the Citadel came together in his head with the impossibility of the task to offer him a pretty good guess as to the identity of this benefactor, and so he was not surprised when he came around the corner to find the colony's lead mechanic, Delan, screaming at a woman Kaidan knew intimately. He stood in the shadows for a moment, unnoticed, remembering how to breathe, looking her over, and composing himself.

She was beautiful. Exactly as he remembered, if a bit more pale and with a few more scars. But she was Shepard, that was undoubtable, from the direct gaze to the sympathetic voice to the determined stance. His heart flipped wildly in his chest, thudding against his ribcage. Shepard. Truly alive. A dream come true. Unbelievable.

But where had she been all this time? Why had she let him believe she was dead? Surely he had deserved to know, after what they had been to each other. Had he been wrong about how she'd felt about him? Had her feelings changed while she was away, presumed dead? Two years was a long time. Kaidan could hear his heartbeat pounding furiously in his ears, demanding answers.

"There's nothing we can do," Shepard was saying to Delan now. She put a hand on his shoulder in an attempt to calm him. "I'm sorry."

Always excitable, Delan was having none of it. He knocked her hand away. "Half the colony's on that ship! You have to do something!"

"I didn't want it to end this way. I did what I could."

"More than most, Shepard." Another familiar voice. Garrus. Him here, too? How was he here, when Kaidan hadn't heard a single word from her since her supposed death?

"Shepard?" Delan asked. "That name sounds familiar."

Kaidan had waited long enough; he had to speak to her now, had to know what the hell was going on. He emerged from the shadows, feeling her gaze settle on him like a touch, focusing on his breathing, trying to calm his heartrate enough to speak like a normal person. If she could spend two years letting him think she was dead, he could at least spend two minutes pretending he was all right with that. "Commander Shepard. The first human Spectre. Savior of the Citadel. Delan, you're in the presence of a legend." He looked her straight in the eye. "And a ghost."

She blinked at that, looking away. Guilt? Or had she not expected to see him here? Or had she hoped not to?

Delan was scowling at him. "Figures. All the good people taken, and you get left behind? 'Course." He threw up his hands in disgust and stalked off, but Kaidan barely noticed.

He was still looking at Shepard. Beautiful Juniper, just as he remembered her. Definitely a few more scars on her face, but that only made her look more like what she was. "I thought you were dead, Shepard. We all did." Without thinking he reached for her, and she came into his arms, and it was just as it had been before, her head resting against his shoulder. Disregarding Garrus and the salarian behind her, Kaidan closed his eyes and held her.

At last he had to let her go, or he wasn't sure he'd be able to. He stepped back.

Shepard smiled at him. "It's been too long, Kaidan. How have you been?"

She was too calm, and it set off something like fireworks in Kaidan's chest. He could no longer hold in all his questions, his burning need to know the answers. "Is that all you have to say to me? You show up after two years—two years!—and just act like nothing happened?" He leaned toward her, the words tumbling out of his mouth, the words he had wanted to say since he heard the first rumor. "I thought we had something together, Shepard, something real. I— I loved you! Thinking you were dead tore me apart. How could you put me through that? Why didn't you try to contact me? Why didn't you let me know you were alive?"

Her mouth opened in surprise, her eyes, so open to him, showing he had hurt her. "Because I spent those two years in a coma! Do you think I chose to spend two years of my life lying on my back unconscious while Cerberus put me back together? Don't you think the first thing I wanted to do when I woke up was contact you? I tried! The Alliance wouldn't tell me where you were!"

The revelation of how she was here sent him staggering back in shock. Rebuilt by Cerberus? Working for them now? Shepard? He looked at her with suspicion, Shepard whom he had always trusted. Was she even herself anymore, or just some Cerberus construct? "Cerberus?" he whispered. He looked past her at the turian who had been his friend. "Garrus, you, too? I can't believe the reports were right."

"Reports?" Garrus asked. "You mean you already knew?"

"Anderson hinted that you might," Shepard added.

Kaidan nodded. "Alliance intel thought Cerberus might be behind the missing human colonists. I was sent here after we were tipped that this colony might be next. Anderson stone-walled me … but there were rumors that you weren't dead … and that you were working for the enemy. I—wanted to believe them, but I was afraid to."

"Cerberus and I want the same thing right now—to find the Collectors and stop the attacks on the colonies, and beyond that to deal with the Reapers. It's a partnership, for the moment; it doesn't mean I answer to them."

"Do you really believe that, or is that just what Cerberus wants you to think?"

"My mind is my own."

"Then you knowingly turned your back on everything we believed in!" He had wanted this to go so much differently … but after all this time, after accepting her loss, beginning to start over, how could it have? He wanted her as much as ever, but he had learned to live without her once. He didn't know if he could do it again, and he couldn't afford to find out. And Cerberus … that was one step too far. Above all else, Kaidan was Alliance to the core, and Cerberus stood against that. They always had, they always would. If Shepard was with them now, she was against the Alliance. Against him. Simple as that.

"Kaidan, you know me!" she protested. "No one knows me better. You know I'd only do this for the right reasons."

"I knew you," he corrected. "Two years ago. I don't know you now."

She winced; he had hurt her with his words, and he felt like a heel, but he couldn't take them back. He wasn't sure he wanted to.

"You saw it yourself," Garrus pointed out. "The Collectors are targeting human colonies, and they're working with the Reapers."

"I want to believe you. Both of you. But I don't trust Cerberus. They could be using the threat of a Reaper to manipulate you!"

"Like they claim Saren did? Oh, I heard the popular story back on the Citadel. But you were there on Ilos, you know what the Reapers can do. They're getting ready to do it again, and they're using the Collectors to start with humanity. And we can stop it, Kaidan! Or we can give it a hell of a good try."

Kaidan shook his head. "You've changed, Shepard, but I still know where my loyalties lie. I'm an Alliance soldier. Always will be." He hesitated, not wanting to leave it this way, but not knowing what other way there might be. "I've got to report back to the Citadel."

"Come with me, Kaidan, please," she said softly. "It'll be just like old times."

He closed his eyes, feeling the silk of her hair against his chest in his memory, practically tasting her kisses. Memories he'd pushed away for so long came flooding back, and he wanted to turn back, to apologize, to tell her he'd go with her—but he couldn't. Not and know who and what he was. "No. It won't. I can never work for Cerberus." He stood looking at her. He had no need to memorize her face; he knew it already. But if this was the last time he ever saw her … "Good-bye, Shepard. And be careful."