This story has a mild mature alert, Ron is having fun, Monique is having fun, weird situations alert.
Ron sat in the office talking with recruiters, he was starting to feel like a big time athlete, he brought the wrap around shades in to the office with him, partly to look cool, partly to hide the 3 hours of sleep he'd been getting.
The man from UNLV was talking about all the wonderful opportunities a young man such as Ron could have living in Las Vegas, Ron nodded, "Cool…When can I tour the campus?" he asked with a straight face.
Ron was half listening and nodding, "I wonder if Monique would like to go out for the Thursday night ritual?" he thought to himself.
Ron was nodding and suddenly the man from UNLV stood up, "We can work a campus visit anytime that's convenient for you Ron…I know you'll be impressed with our school." He told Ron as he shook his hand.
Ron nodded, "Maybe I should be asking for cars and money like the football players get?" he thought wickedly to himself. Ron smiled a big toothy grin, "Cool…Looking forward to the visit." He said as he waived at recruiter.
Ron turned to Coach Barken after the recruiter left the office, "Am I doing the right things or should I be asking for money and women?" Ron said with a chuckle.
Coach Barken shook his head, "Stoppable…Don't ask for money, drugs, women or cars, this is cross country not basketball or football." He said with a grin.
The University of Texas El Paso took a pass on Ron, he wasn't tall enough they felt to be a good division one runner. So Ron was able to get out of the meetings in time to go to his normal lunch period.
He sat in his usual seat and waited for Monique, she came up from behind him, "Hey FC BF how'd your meetings go?" she asked smiling at the boy in wrap around shades.
Ron was leaned back acting cool, "Well no one has given me any cars yet or offered me money…I'm going to visit UNLV…Vegas baby Vegas." Ron said laughing.
Monique laughed, "You go boy."
Ron smiled, "So does my new EH GF need a ride home today?" Ron asked tugging on the sleeve of his letterman's jacket that was wearing.
Monique giggled, "EH…Extra Hot? And yes I could use a ride to work today…It would give my brother a break."
Ron laughed; "Extremely hot!" he corrected her.
Monique squealed and acted like she was going to faint, "I swear Ron Stoppable you do know how to talk to the ladies…Now eat something." She told him as she pointed at his plate.
Ron took a bite of his food, "You close tonight?" he asked her.
Monique nodded, "Yea, I close." She said sadly
Ron leaned back in his chair, "You up for a little Thursday night ritual?" he asked her with a grin.
Monique looked at him, "Thursday night what?" she asked with a puzzled look.
Ron laughed, "It what we at Smarty Mart called our weekly trip to the Odyssey downtown." He told her.
Monique looked uneasy, "I don't know ...it's a school night and all, I could really get in trouble…OK, what time you picking me up?" she asked excitedly.
Ron smiled, "I'll be there after you close." He told her as he got up to leave for class.
Monique shook her head as she watched him leave, "That boy is so full of surprises…I think he may actually be too much man for Kim to handle. I think I'll just borrow him a little while longer." She thought as she smiled a devilish grin.
Kim made it through most of the day in a white hot anger and then started to cool off after lunch, "This all big misunderstanding, I'll talk with Ron after school and we'll sort it all out…Then I will slap him senseless." She thought happily to herself.
Kim visited her locker for the last time before she went home, she cringed out of the corner of her eye she could see Bonnie approaching her to make her day complete, "So Kimmie…I hear your not the number one girl friend anymore? I hope you don't mind if I date Ron after Monique is finished with him? I do hope Tara doesn't beat me to it…I guess that's what you get for not keeping Ron on the reservation." She said with an insanely sweet smile.
Kim wheeled away and headed for the exit; she figured it was either that or slap Bonnie senseless. She pushed open the doors and headed into the parking lot, she saw Ron standing by his car, "We're going to get this settled now." She thought angrily to herself.
She was just about to start off for Ron's car when she saw Monique stride up next to him and give him another big hug and a kiss. Then Ron opened the passenger side door and let her step inside before closing the door. Then Ron got in his side and fired up the car and backed away.
Kim stood there with her mouth open, Bonnie walked by, "They do make a cute couple don't they?" she asked with an evil gleam in her eye.
Kim turned and started walking for home, "Yesterday…that was me in that car. I did not break up with him, Monique works tonight, I'll call Ron a little later and get this all sorted out." She thought sadly as she walked for home.
Ron dropped Monique off at the mall, and Ron told her what time he'd be by to pick her up. Then he went to Bueno Nacho to pick up some food for him and Rufus and to visit Ned.
Ned eyed him when he walked in, "I never thought you'd do it? What were you thinking?' he asked him in a tweaked voice.
Ron shook his head, "I do a lot of things Ned, be a little less random."
Ned said, "It's all over school, you dumped Kim, what are you thinking?"
Ron started laughing, "I didn't dump her, she dumped me…at least this time I saw it coming." He corrected his friend.
Ned shook his head, "Then you start running with Monique, you don't waste any time do you."
Ron just shook his head, "You taking my order or what, and for your information she's trying to get me and Kim back together…Only problem is…I kind of like Monique now." He said shaking his head in wonderment.
Ned shook his head, "You want the usual…Your train is way off the tracks, here Ron."
Ron shrugged, "The usual…I think my train left the tracks a long time ago." He told Ned in a serious tone.
Ned placed the order, "So Kim dumped you?"
Ron nodded, "Yea…I think so…Probably…I don't know, food coming anytime soon?" he asked in a tweaked voice.
Ned held up his hands, "Ok, ok, you set me straight…So after you dump Monique who's next?" Ned asked conspiratorially.
Ron shook his head, "Gee, I don't know, maybe I'll be tired of girls and start dating Josh Mankey."
Ned started laughing and handed Ron his food, Ron left Bueno Nacho and headed home. He had an unpleasant thought, "I have $18 left in the bank, I just spent $5 for Bueno Nacho, I'll have to check my emergency stash at home, I need at least $20 to pay cover and sodas tonight." He thought nervously to himself.
He pulled into the driveway and went to his room with the food, he took care of Rufus first as he started his dig for cash, "I've got to start working again, this is almost embarrassing…Ok emergency stash has ten dollars left, look through the laundry basket, pants has a five…five in my wallet. I have enough for tonight…Whewwwww I would have hated to call Kim up for a loan to date Monique." Ron thought wickedly to himself.
Ron looked up at the clock radio, it was 8:30 just enough time to take a shower and change into club attire. He sprang into action, went through the shower dressed in his best looking threads that Super Dave hooked him up with back in the summer. He ate some of Bueno Nacho, which he thought still didn't taste right.
Now it was 9:00 time to go, he snuck down the stairs and into the night. He rolled his car out of the driveway and coasted down the street to just in front of Kim's house. He fired the engine and turned on the head lights, "Ha, too easy." He thought as he headed to the Middleton Mall.
Kim was looking up at Ron's house trying to decide if she should call or not, when she seen Ron guide the car down the street without any lights on. Then when it was in front of her house she heard him start it, "Ok Ron, what are you up to now?" she thought to herself.
Kim nodded her head, "He's up to something, let's go ahead and give him a call and find out just what it is." She thought as she pulled her cell phone out and speed dialed Ron's number.
Ron heard the phone go off, he looked at the caller ID, "Kim…uh oh…busted." He thought smiling to himself. Ron answered the phone, "Hey KP, what's up?" he asked trying to sound normal.
Kim nodded her head, "Ron where are you going at this hour of the night…and NO I DID NOT DUMP YOU…it was a fight." She said angrily.
Ron smiled and shook his head, "Kim, I'm still at home…Sometimes Rufus just feels the need to take to the road…I think he's running with a fast crowd these days." He said while trying not to laugh.
Kim was not letting go of the conversation so easily, "Ha, ha Ron, now I did not dump you, we were having a fight…So you stop all this pretend relationship with Monique business and start concentrating on making up with me." She said indignantly.
Ron raised an eyebrow, "A fight...a fight? Kim it takes two people to fight I was just standing there when you went all psycho and threw a jacket in my face." Ron told her angrily.
Kim stomped her foot on the floor, "Ron, it was a fight." She insisted.
Ron smiled, "No this is a fight…I'm participating…see the difference." He pointed out to her.
Kim rolled her eyes, "Ok Ron…this is a fight…So where are you sneaking off too? She asked, the curiosity was getting the better of her.
Ron shook his head, "No, I don't really think of this as so much of a fight as a very animated discussion…If you must know, I'm picking Monique up and we're heading to the Odyssey for Thursday night ritual." He told her calmly.
Kim started shaking the phone and pointing at it before she regained control, "Ron this just officially became a fight…The Odyssey…the Odyssey…You never took me to the Odyssey." She said through clenched teeth.
Ron held the phone away from him while he pulled his car over so he wouldn't wreck from laughing, "Well you know Kim, Monique and I both work nights and we're used to the late hours…Besides…it's a sophistication thing…Clubs is more of a Monique thing." He told her while trying not to laugh.
Kim was red in the face, "Sophistication, sophistication, you want to talk to me about SOPHISTICATION, MISTER I'M WEARING MY DAD'S PROM TUX on an UNDERCOVER MISSION…Don 't you talk to me about sophistication Ronald Stoppable." She yelled into the phone.
Ron was holding the phone away from his ear during Kim's tirade, "Uhhhh ok KP, you got me there…Umm…I have to go Monique's coming…I'll see you tomorrow, ok?" Ron said hanging up the phone.
Kim was just getting warmed up, "RON DON'T YOU HANG UP THAT PHONE RON…RON…This isn't over Ron…You tell Monique her day is coming…you're…not there anymore…" Kim put the phone away sadly.
Ron turned back onto the street and headed to the mall, he felt kind of bad about Kim, "I thought she broke up with me…I didn't know it was a fight…wait it does take two people to fight…so was it really a break up…I wish I understood girls better." He thought as he turned into the mall.
Ron waited for Monique and more or less filled her in on his phone conversation with Kim. Monique nodded, "Oh yea she broke up with you, and when I…appeared to snatch you up…she regained interest in you…You ever notice Ron when things go well for you, she pulls the floor out from under you?" she asked Ron, clearly knowing that he'd never thought of that before.
Ron shook his head, "No…I never thought of that before, back in May I was feeling really good and then she dumps me…Now I'm getting all this attention from college recruiters and she does it again…weird how that works." He said trying to figure it out.
Monique nodded, "She just doesn't want to see a strong, proud Ron that's all, and she's only interested in you when you're down on your luck and self hating…Now let's go to that club." She said getting Ron in a Monique frame of mind.
Ron smiled, "Yea let's go…The new proud, strong Ron is ready for some clubbin'." He informed Monique proudly as he fired the car up and headed downtown.
Monique stretched out in the passenger seat and watched the scenery of the night go by as Ron drove them to the Odyssey, "Ok, Kimmie let's see you work your way out of this one." She thought wickedly to herself.
Ron parked the car and escorted Monique to the front door of the club; he paid the cover charge and looked at the band for the night. Ron tilted his head, "Voice of God?" he said as he looked at Monique. Monique just shrugged as they had the underage wrist bands put on them so they wouldn't be served any alcohol.
Ron looked around the club, there weren't too many familiar faces left that he knew from the summer. He and Monique went to the bar, "Hey Jill, Need a couple of sodas over here." He yelled at the bartender.
Jill came over to him, "Ron Man haven't seen you in her for ages…What will you and your lady friend like tonight." She asked obviously happy to see Ron.
Ron pointed at Monique and she told him she wanted a diet coke, "Diet Coke for the lady and I'll have a coke…So how's this…Voice of God band?" he asked out of curiousity.
Jill shook her head as she made the drinks, "Messy, the leader of the group dresses up like a nun and plays a Macintosh computer while the others make this industrial grunge type noise, then at the end of the concert they crucify the nun and carry him through the crowd and everyone throws beer on him…Takes forever to clean up after their done." She informed the two as she handed them their drinks.
Ron just nodded and paid for the drinks, "Oh great…can't miss this." He told the bartender.
Jill laughed, "You two better get you a table before the disciples arrive…They're the bands loyal following…never miss a show…we'll be packed in about a half hour." She told the two teenagers.
Ron nodded, "Let's head on into the main room." He told Monique.
Monique and Ron found a table and Monique scooted up close to Ron and started kissing his neck and nibbling on his ear, "Ron is definitely too much man for Kim." She thought happily to herself.
Soon the club was filled up, the disciples arrived, some dressed as nuns, some as priests. One of the priests was sporting an inflatable sheep and was pouring liquor into an opening in the rear end and giving fellow disciples "Sheep Shots" it was all Ron and Monique could do to keep from falling on the floor laughing.
One of the girls that was dressed as a nun spotted the two of them and pointed and screamed, "VIRGINS" at Ron and Monique. Monique kind of scrunched down into her chair and Ron just sat there grinning stupidly.
The priest with the inflatable sheep came up to their table, "We must indoctrinate the non believers…Drink from the sheep!" He demanded as he passed the sheep to Ron.
Ron took the sheep and gave the priest a weird look, "Come on boy drink, you haven't lived until you've drank from a sheep's ass." He told Ron.
Ron was in an adventurous mood and he didn't want to look weak in front of Monique so he drank. Ron's eyes went cross and he started to cough as the burning liquid made it down his throat. Everyone cheered and then it was Monique's turn and up went the sheep and Monique made a face similar to Ron's and the crowd cheered louder.
The disciples moved on and Ron was still making faces, Monique waved a hand in front of her face, "Haven't tasted Jack Daniels in a long time…whoa…that was stiff." She said as the band took to the stage.
Ron nodded, "Boo…booyah" he croaked out, as his attention was drawn to the stage.
The band came out and the happy little man in his nun's habit appeared and started jumping up and down playing music samples on the Macintosh computer to the grinding pulsing rhythm of the music from the band. Ron shook his head, "These guys aren't bad." He said pointing at the group.
Monique laughed, "They ain't the Oh Boyz, that's for sure." She said
The evening wore on and band played, and the man in the nun's habit was cookin' on that Mac. In between one of the sets, the happy little man playing the Mac took to the microphone, "You are a blessed crowd this evening…Are there any virgins in the house tonight?" he yelled
Everyone in the room pointed at Ron and Monique, then the disciples brought the two forward. The man with the microphone pointed at Monique, "Put the virgin on stage, it's time her boyfriend has his first belly shot." The man roared into the microphone.
Then he noticed the bracelets, "Ohhhh under 21 are we…WELL this is a religious ceremony, we can get away with this." He hollered as the crowd cheered. He had Monique lie down on the stage and pull her shirt up to expose her belly button and then he poured Jack Daniels on her belly and Monique squealed as the cold liquid hit her skin.
The crowd went crazy, then the man pointed at Ron, "Drink from the fountain of life." He told Ron pointing at Monique.
Ron didn't have to be told twice as he dived into Monique's belly button. Monique twisted and laughed as Ron's tongue went to work. When Ron was done Monique was laughing and sat up and gave him a big tongue kiss and the crowd went nuts.
Then the man with the microphone pointed at Ron, "Your turn to be sacrificed on the alter boy." He yelled into the microphone.
Ron traded places with Monique on the stage and then he had the whisky poured into his belly button, he jerked as the cold liquid hit his skin. The man with the microphone pointed at Monique, "Time to drink from the well of your man's soul." He screamed into the microphone.
Monique didn't waste any time herself as she dived into Ron's belly button, Ron laughed and squirmed as Monique's tongue was tickling him. Then when Monique was done Ron sat up laughing and gave her a big tongue kiss in return and the crowd continued to go crazy.
Once the ceremony was done, the bass player handed them each a CD and Ron and Monique returned to their seats. Ron noticed that their drinks had been topped off and he picked his up and smelled it, "Whoa that's a little stronger than when we left the table." He told Monique as he pointed at the spiked drinks.
Monique shrugged and took a sip, "Your drivin' leave the drinking to me." She told him with a big grin on her face.
Ron laughed and shook his head, "Deal…Cool CD's aren't they." He said waiving his at Monique.
Monique nodded, "This is soooooo cool…If I catch you giving that CD to Kim, I'm kicking your ass." She told him grinning.
Ron laughed, "You got that right." He told her as he turned to watch the next set from the band.
Ron could not remember a time during the summer when the club was generating so much excitement, the place literally seemed to jumping on its foundations and the happy little man in the nun's habit continued to play his Macintosh.
Ron looked over at Monique and she was really digging the show, "Yep made the right choice for this date, Kim movies, Monique is definitely night club all the way." He thought to himself.
Monique stood up and crossed in front of Ron and sat down in his lap, "Thank you for bringing me here Ron…This place is kickin' it." She yelled in his ear before she started kissing the ear and nibbling on his ear lobe.
Ron leaned back and lightly rubbed his hand up and down her back as he enjoyed the attention and took in the show. Monique shivered as he ran his finger tips up and down her back, "Where did you learn to do that?" she whispered in Ron's ear between songs.
Ron just shrugged, "It seemed like something pleasant to do." He told her as he kissed the nape of her neck.
Monique smiled, "You are definitely full of surprises Ron Stoppable." She told him as she went back to kissing his neck.
The band finally reached the climax of the evening they played their big closing number and then a large cross was brought out and the happy little man in the nun's habit lay on the cross. The cross was then taken around the room as the fans threw beer on the guy, Ron picked up his spiked drink and hurled it at the guy and then the show was over and disciples began to leave.
Ron took that as his cue as well, "Let's head on out Monique." He told her quietly.
Monique had a big grin on her face, "Ok Ronnie…can you drive me home?" she asked him in happy little drunken voice.
Ron helped her stand up and then he helped her on with the letterman jacket, "You know why I like wearing this jacket sooooooo much Ronnie?" Monique asked tittering back and forth as she tried to walk.
Ron was enjoying Monique's intoxication, "No Monique why do you like wearing my jacket so much." He asked her.
Monique leaned against Ron, "Because I know how hard you had to work for it…ol' Kimmie she don't app..prec..respect anything you do for her…she juss pects stuff…she ain't never worked hard like you and me…you know?" she said as she tried to sit back down in a chair.
Ron was giggling, "Yea…I know." He told his sauced girl friend.
Ron helped Monique to her feet again and they started out for the door again, "Kimmie's alright for a friend Ron…but she can't love you the waysssss I wanna luvsss you…you know?" she asked as she put her arms around Ron and started to kiss him.
Ron stroked her face, "I know Monique." He told her as they headed out into the street.
Monique caught sight of Jill the bartender on the way out, "Byeeeeeee…lill, we'll be back next week…ok…Ronnie…can we come back next week?"
Ron shook his head, "I'm kind of tapped out till I get some more money rolling in from Smarty Mart." He told her truthfully.
Monique waived a hand in the air, "No big, no big, I'm a proud working women, I'll pay next week…I'll pay next week…you know?" she said as she turned and gave Ron another big tongue kiss.
Monique was on a roll, "You know, you know that tongue of yours…you know…It jussss makes me soooooo horney." Then Monique started laughing and almost fell over before Ron caught her.
Ron was giggling, "It does?" he asked her as he made sure he had a little firmer grip on Monique.
Monique was laughing, "Good catch…good catch…does what?" she asked not remember what she had told him a few seconds ago.
Ron almost had her to the car and then Monique spotted a park bench and drug him over to it. Ron shook his head, "Now what was it about my tongue again?" he asked laughing at Monique's plight.
Monique sat on the bench smiling, "You and that tongue, Kimmie don't know how to app..appr…respect a tongue like I do." She told Ron in a serious voice.
Ron finally got her back to the car and drove her back to her house; Monique talked about any and everything and then passed out. Ron giggled and shook his head, "I hope she don't puke in my car." He thought to himself.
Ron pulled up in front of Monique's house at 3:30am and then discovered a new problem, "How am I going to get her from my car to inside of her house?" he thought to himself.
Ron opened the passenger side door and drug Monique's legs out of the car then he reached inside and shook her, "Monique…Time to go home…we're here Monique…Please wake up." He begged.
Monique's eyes finally opened, "Was it good for you too Ronnie?" and then she was out again.
Ron hit panic mode, he managed to lift her up and lean her against his car, then he put one arm around her waist and started to walk her up to the front door, "Monique…Please wake up…Please…" Ron's thoughts were gone as he realized the door was open and there was a large man standing in it.
The large man did not look happy, then Monique woke up, "Hi daddy…I want you to meet Lonnie." She said before her head slumped forward again.
Ron never was certain what happened next, to him it appeared as if a giant hand was coming straight for him so he dropped Monique and ran for his car. He heard a soft thud behind him; he assumed it was either Monique falling onto her father or Monique hitting the ground. Ron never stayed long enough to check as he was in the driver's seat and gunning the car down the street as fast as he could.
Ron was laughing as soon as he realized he wasn't being pursued, "Booyah…Now that was a fun date." He thought to himself as he guided the car home.
Kim arrived at school early in order to catch Ron and Monique and have a few words with them. Monique finally arrived staggering in wearing a black turtle neck sweater and sunglasses to hide the blood shot eyes.
Monique stopped in front of Kim raised her hand and declared, "He's…He'sss…too much man for you." And then she staggered on by to go to her locker.
Kim just looked at her, "What did they do last night?" she wondered.
Ron came in a few minutes later wearing his wrap around shades, he waived at Kim, "Later KP…Later KP." Was all he said as he stumbled off down the hall to his own locker.
Kim didn't quite know what to do, so she did nothing, "they're both going to die…I'm killing both of em' as soon as I hear what happened last night." She thought to herself.