Conspiracies and Unresolved Consequences
Chapter 3
Late evening, Monday 7th August 1876
Jarrod dropped his mother's six page letter on his desk beside the unopened missive, simply marked with the name "Heath" on it, with a shaking hand and picked up the small creased picture of a young Tom Barkley and his older brother James. Studying the picture gave him no clue as to why it held so much meaning to his mother and presumably his brother. What would Nick understand, he wondered as he repeated his mother's words, when he looked at the picture? Jarrod dropped the picture back on the desk beside the letters and released a deep sigh as he reached for his scotch, downing the remains in the glass in one gulp. He leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes, shaking his head as he considered the enormity of his mother's confession and the complexities of her request.
Before he could even consider approaching Nick and Audra with this 'confession', he had to first come to terms with his own emotions on the matter. My God, he had another brother, they had another brother that they knew nothing about all because their father… Jarrod raked his fingers through his hair and pushed back his chair; standing abruptly he turned and glared at the silent portrait of his father staring back at him. "Well Father, all that time you spent with Nick and me after your return from Strawberry, was that just your way of expunging your guilt at what transpired in Strawberry with Leah Thomson?" Jarrod turned away from his father's image and reached for the decanter of scotch sitting on the corner of his desk. Liberally filling his glass he took a long swallow and dropped back into his chair with a choked off cry. The two people, no, he corrected himself, the three people if his mother was correct, who could supply the answers to the multitude of questions he, and no doubt his siblings as well as Heath Thomson had, were either dead or unable to communicate.
Jarrod grasped the glass tightly in his fisted hand: he was angry, beyond angry, and disgusted at his father's betrayal of his marriage vows to his wife. Surely on some level his father must have realized that what he was doing was wrong. How could their father have forgotten them so completely? He would have to ask Doctor Merar about that because if what his father claimed to be the truth was actually correct, could he - they - really hold him responsible for his actions in Strawberry? Perhaps not for those first months, but what about after that? Tom Barkley knew he had had an affair, slept freely with another woman, surely he was aware of the consequences: yet he made no effort to follow up with Leah Thomson, blindly obeying their mother's demands, as to even the possibility of a child. Did that make him a coward, fearful of being humiliated in public for his transgression or of losing Victoria and his sons? Or was he just indifferent to the plight of a lonely woman? Jarrod took another long swallow of his scotch. And where did that leave their mother? She was a woman, she too knew the consequences of a four month affair, hadn't she admitted that in her writings? And yet she also ignored the obvious, prepared instead to turn a blind eye to the consequences of that affair, to the possibility of a child. Was the fact that she demanded that their father never return to Strawberry, an admission of guilt as to what could have been and what she wished to ignore? He could not help but wonder, discovering Heath Thomson, was it the shock and the accompanying guilt that brought on their mother's stroke?
Jarrod scrubbed tiredly at his face, he heard the grandfather clock in the hall chime the midnight hour and as much as he wanted to sleep, he knew his thoughts would not allow him that luxury this night. The best he could hope for on this night would be some resolutions to the myriad questions facing him and his family. He knew the best way to achieve that would be by making notes of what needed to be done, and asked of …who?
Reaching for pen and paper he made his first entry. How were they to confirm the veracity of their mother's story? Was her written word enough or did they enlist the services of the Pinkerton agency to investigate her claims? Did he travel to Strawberry himself and search out anyone still living in the town that could corroborate the story? Who else could he ask? Certainly not Nick: his own memories were hazy of that time and Nick was three years his junior. Jarrod dropped the pen on the desk and hurriedly picked up the letter again as a thought struck him like a thunderbolt. What had Mother said? He scanned the pages looking for the passage he needed.
Do you remember, you would pick wild flowers and Silas (bless Silas, what would we do without him) would help you cut a rose bloom from the rosebushes?
Jarrod nodded and allowed a small smile to lighten his face as the answer stared him in the face: Silas had been on the ranch at the time. In fact Silas had travelled with his parents as a free man when they had first settled on the land in 1840. Jarrod closed his eyes. Silas had done his best in those early days to shield him and Nick from the arguments raging in their parents' bedroom and other areas of the house when the arguments and tempers rose around them. Silas would quietly take their hands and lead them from the room, offering freshly baked cookies or cakes and cold glasses of milk to the two confused children, all the while trying to explain, without explaining, why their parents were fighting. Jarrod picked up his pen and wrote a simple note on the pad in front of him. Ask Silas.
Jarrod refilled his glass, and realized he was not sure when he had actually emptied it. After taking a sip he jotted another note – tell Nick and Audra. He didn't think that he could afford to wait for Eugene to get home. It was going to take their youngest brother a week to travel from Detroit to Stockton, provided of course there were no major hold ups along the way. No, he had to tell Nick and Audra today, but how? The clock stuck one.
This is my story to tell, not yours. Please pass this letter on to each of your siblings so that they too may read my words.
Jarrod lifted his glass to the ceiling above him. "Thank you Mother."
Next: find Heath Thomson – how? Engage the Pinkerton Detective Agency and give them what reason…or send Nick? If they were to keep it in the family for the foreseeable future, Nick was the logical choice, but Jarrod knew him: could Nick hold his temper long enough to get Heath back to the ranch and more importantly, what did they tell Heath – not just to get him to come to the ranch but about his – their – father? It wasn't like Nick could just blurt out –"You're our brother – come and live at the ranch." Nor did he want to send their mother's letter with Nick. Neither Heath nor Nick needed to deal with those revelations in a cabin in the Sierras on their own. No, Heath needed to be here at the ranch when he discovered his family. What to tell Heath could wait until he had spoken with Nick. Both letters would stay at the ranch until Heath arrived here.
I hope, no I know, you will do right by your brother Heath.
Jarrod sighed – you will do right by your brother Heath. What was she asking? Could he even accomplish what she wanted of him? To find Heath and bring him home?
Find your brother, bring him home, embrace him and let him work beside you. This is where he and his horse ranch belong.
Legally they had no obligation to do anything. Their father never claimed Heath as his son, therefore Heath Thomson had no claim on the Barkley family or its holdings. They could just ignore their mother's request and not make contact with Heath Thomson. He could destroy the letters and no one would be the wiser: if by some miracle their mother did recover, he could always plead ignorance and say that they never found any letters. Could he? He made a pledge when he became a lawyer to uphold the law, to seek the truth and to ensure justice was done. He had learnt however that sometimes there was a difference between justice and the law. He realized this may be one of those times. No, he couldn't consciously ignore what he already knew, his sense of justice wouldn't allow him, nor would his sense of morality.
Jarrod's mind was racing: Mother wanted Heath to learn the truth; she wanted to try to make amends for her failures, and the failures of her husband and Leah Thomson. She wanted Heath to live on the ranch, she wanted her children to accept Heath as their sibling, she wanted him to be their equal, she wanted him to become a part of the Barkley family and all it entailed. All well and good but what about Heath Thomson, how would he react to this news? What were they to do if he rejected their offer, whatever it may be? Where did that then leave them – with an estranged brother that they were just supposed to forget about?
And the clock struck two.
Jarrod dropped the pen on the desk and leant back in his chair. He really needed some sleep; he had more questions than answers. Perhaps the light of day would reveal some simple solutions but he doubted it very much. Sighing deeply, he folded his mother's letter and replaced it, the missive to Heath and the picture back in the envelope and returned the whole to his jacket pocket. Pushing back his chair he made one final note on the pad – speak to Thomas re: amnesia, and then dropped the pad and its notes in his desk drawer. It wouldn't do for either of his siblings or Silas to find his notes before he was ready to deal the cards he had been given. Jarrod paused, pulled open the draw once more, picked up the pad and pen and made what he hoped was indeed his final entry for the night – What if Mother was wrong? He twirled the pen between his fingers, sighed heavily, replaced the items in his draw and then strode from the room.
BV
Early morning, Tuesday 8th August 1876
Jarrod knocked softly on his mother's bedroom door before opening it quietly and slipping silently into the room. Audra was asleep in the chair beside their mother's bed, but to his surprise their mother was awake and staring at his sleeping sister. Victoria tracked Jarrod with her eye as he moved across the room to stop beside the bed. He bent down and whispered "Hello Mother," surprised when she blinked her right eye in response. "You can understand me Mother?"
Victoria blinked again and then with some effort slowly raised the index finger of her right hand and pointed it at Audra, then her bedroom door and then finally to her bed. Jarrod followed his mother's finger movements, a smile forming on his face as he realized what she wanted. "You want Audra to go to bed?"
Victoria blinked and closed her eye.
Jarrod gently shook his sister awake, "Go to bed Audra, I'll stay with Mother for the rest of the night."
"But what…"
"If she needs you for anything I promise I will come and get you but you need to get some proper sleep while you can. Mother is going to need your help for a long while and you can't give it if you are exhausted." Jarrod helped Audra up from the chair and waited as she kissed Victoria on the cheek before he escorted her to the door, planting his own kiss on the top of her head. "Good night honey, I'll see you in the morning." He watched from the doorway as Audra made her way down the hall and entered her room, before he closed his mother's bedroom door and sat in the chair his sister had just vacated. "She's gone to her room Mother."
Victoria opened her eye and stared at Jarrod.
"I can't imagine how frustrating this is for you Mother," he offered, gently grasping her right hand in his. He smiled when he felt a weak squeeze in return.
"Alright, we need some form of communication."
Victoria blinked in response.
"What about one blink for yes, and two for no?"
Victoria blinked once and then wriggled her finger on the bed.
"I understood the yes but I don't know what you want now."
Victoria made a small grunting noise in frustration and tapped the bed slowly with her finger again. This time Jarrod carefully watched the finger movement as Victoria painstakingly tried to make herself understood. Once her finger stopped moving, Jarrod looked up to see Victoria trying to swallow. Jarrod's eyes widen as he realized that his mother had tried to spell the word water. "You would like some water?"
Victoria blinked once and closed her eye with a soft sigh.
Jarrod stood, dipped the spoon resting on the plate beside the water jug in the water and then carefully brought the spoonful of water to his mother's mouth. "Open your mouth Mother," he said resting the spoon against her lips. Victoria parted her lips so that Jarrod could allow the water to trickle slowly into her mouth. At the same time he gently massaged her throat to help her swallow. "More?" Victoria blinked. Twice more they repeated the process until Victoria turned her head slowly away from Jarrod and closed her eyes. "Sleep now Mother, I'll be here if you need anything."
Jarrod sat in silence, watching his mother sleep. He fingered the letter tucked in his jacket pocket and wondered if he could actually get some of his questions answered after all.
BV
Breakfast Tuesday 8th August 1876
Silas knocked softly on Victoria's bedroom door and then waited in the hall for his knock to be answered. "Breakfast is served Mister Jarrod, I can sit with Miz Barkley while you eat and the doctor will be here in an hour."
Jarrod looked back into the room to ensure his mother was still sleeping before he stepped out into the hallway. "Thank you Silas. Mother is sleeping at the moment. She asked for some water earlier."
Silas eyes widened. "Miz Barkley spoke, Mister Jarrod?"
Jarrod sighed, "Not in so many words Silas but we did work out a form of communication. Mother can hear and understand us, she just can't respond verbally. If you ask a question she will blink once for yes and twice for no. She is also able to write a word with her right index finger on the bed. You just have to watch for it."
"That is good news Mister Jarrod. Miss Audra and Mister Nick will be happy to hear that too."
"Yes I agree Silas it is a hopeful start. Oh Silas, after breakfast and Thomas has left, I would like to speak with you privately in my study if I may."
"Yes of course Mister Jarrod. Now you best go down and get breakfast before Mister Nick eats it all." Silas watched as Jarrod disappeared down the sweeping staircase before he entered Victoria's room and took his place in the chair beside the bed. He studied his employer through sad brown eyes. "I pray you will make a full recovery Miz Barkley, your children surely need you."
BV
Jarrod entered the dining room, stopped to pour a cup of coffee and then moved across to the table. He stopped beside Audra and placed a kiss on her cheek. "Good morning honey, Nick." He acknowledged with a nod of his head as he sat in his chair. "Sleep well Audra?"
"I suppose. How is Mother?"
"She was sleeping when I came down. She woke for a little while and asked for some water." Jarrod put up a hand to stop the questions. "Mother can't speak but she can communicate. One blink of her eye is yes and two is no. She can also move her right index finger slowly and write words on her bed but she tires very quickly."
"Oh that is wonderful Jarrod. Does that mean Mother is getting better?"
"Now honey, I don't want you to get your hopes up. We will have to wait for Thomas and see what he says. What did you have planned for today?" Jarrod asked as he reached for the platter of scrambled eggs and bacon that had just been placed back on the table by Nick.
"I was planning to go to the orphanage this morning but now…"
"No, you should still go Audra. Get out of the house for a little while. Nick and I will be here and Thomas will be coming this morning also."
Nick nodded in agreement, swallowing a mouthful of food. "I agree Audra; most of Mother's care is going to fall to you and the nurse the Doc has organised. Go do something else while you can. Besides, Mother would want you to carry on as normal."
"Yes I know she would. It's just that…"
"We know honey; we all feel the same way, we all want to be here in case Mother needs something but as hard as it is we all still have obligations outside the ranch. The children will be looking forward to your visit and Mother would be the first one to tell you not to disappoint them especially not on her behalf."
"Maybe I'll go after Doctor Merar has been," Audra agreed half-heartedly as she moved her food around her plate with a fork.
"What about you Nick? What are you going to do?"
"Well since you and Audra have sat with Mother, it's my turn now. McColl can run the ranch. We had already discussed our plans for the work needed over the next two weeks before Mother's stroke. McColl knows where to find me if he needs me. What about you Counsellor, what have you got planned for today?"
Jarrod pursed his lips. "I have some research to do for a case I'm working on so I'll be in my study all morning if you need me Nick. I'll take over from you after lunch."
Nick wiped his mouth with his napkin, threw it on the table and pushed his chair back. "I'm going to relieve Silas," he replied standing up.
"I think I'll come with you Nick."
"Not until you've eaten some of that food Missy," Nick stated as he walked from the room.
Jarrod watched Audra poke at her food, "He's right honey. You need to eat something. Mother would be upset if she thought you weren't looking after yourself."
Audra sighed but acquiesced to her brother's cajoling and placed the fork full of food in her mouth. Chewing and swallowing she glared at Jarrod. "Happy now?"
Jarrod smiled, "Well it's a start, now keeping eating."
BV
Once again Jarrod, Nick and Audra found themselves waiting outside their mother's bedroom door while Doctor Merar conducted his examination. Silas closed the bathroom door behind him after replacing the dirty towels with clean ones. He sighed sadly as he studied the three despondent figures waiting in the hallway. "Any news yet Mister Jarrod?" Silas asked as he placed the laundry hamper on the floor beside him.
"Not yet Silas," Jarrod replied.
Silas nodded as he bent down to retrieve the hamper. "Well I best be getting back to work."
Jarrod put out his hand and stopped Silas from picking up the hamper. "Silas, why don't you wait with us? Doctor Merar shouldn't be too much longer and a lot of Mother's care will fall to you too if Nick, Audra and I aren't available. It would be best if you understand what Mother's needs will be too."
Silas blinked back a tear, "If you're sure Mister Jarrod."
"Jarrod's right Silas," Nick agreed. "At some point we will both have to resume our regular duties and Audra has commitments at the orphanage. We won't be able to stay here all time and help Mother."
The bedroom door opened and Doctor Merar stepped out of the room, closing the door behind him.
"Well Thomas?" Jarrod asked as he pushed away from the wall he had been leaning against.
Thomas Merar sighed. This was not going to be an easy conversation. "Victoria is still paralysed on the left side as you all are aware and unable to speak although she does have limited communication with eye and finger movements and can understand what it said to her."
"We know all that Doc, what aren't you telling us?" Nick demanded in frustration.
"Nick," Jarrod warned.
Thomas sighed again, this was a family that didn't like obscure answers, straight to the point was the best approach. "I have detected an arrhythmia in her heart."
"What does that mean Thomas?" Jarrod asked.
"It's an irregularity in the rhythm of the heart or breathing. Has she complained of left arm or chest pains recently?"
"She has never mentioned anything like that to me Thomas, although I doubt that she would even if she was having such pains. What about you Nick, Audra? Silas has she said anything to you?"
Both siblings shook their heads in reply to Jarrod's question.
"Miz Barkley hasn't said anything to me either Mister Jarrod." Silas replied
"Was it caused by the stroke Doctor Merar?"
"Possibly Audra; or perhaps the arrhythmia caused the stroke. I just don't know. What I do know is that your mother is very weak at present and shouldn't be upset or distressed. The nurse will arrive later this afternoon and I'll bring her out when I come back this evening. I have left some Nitro-glycerine tablets on the bedside table for her. If you notice her in difficulty breathing, slip one under her tongue. That's all I can tell you at the moment, I'm sorry. Just keep doing what you're doing, sit with her; talk to her and keep her calm. I'd best be getting back to town now but I will be back to check on her later this evening."
"Doctor Merar, is Mother going to die?" Audra asked quietly.
Thomas pursed his lips before replying. "I can't answer that Audra, I'm sorry. There is so much that is still unknown about the heart and the brain. She may make a full recovery, she may remain as she is for the rest of her life, however long that may be, or she may succumb to her maladies in the near future. Only time will tell. I'm sorry I can't give any of you a clearer answer than that. Now I need to head off. I have several more stops to make before I return to town."
"I'll walk you down Thomas," Jarrod offered as the doctor made ready to leave.
"No need Jarrod, I think after all these years I can find my way out. Stay here with your family."
"I was actually heading to my study to work on a case this morning and I do have a general question for you regarding the case that I hope you can answer."
"Alright Jarrod, fire away and I'll see what I can do to help."
Nick and Audra watched as Jarrod and the doctor descended the curved staircase to the foyer below before they both turned and quietly entered Victoria's room.
BV
"What did you want to know Jarrod?" Thomas asked as they reached the ground floor and headed into Jarrod's study.
"It's rather a delicate matter Thomas," Jarrod replied as he moved around his desk, motioning Thomas to take a seat in the chair in front of the desk as he took his own chair.
"Jarrod, you know I can't reveal any medical information without the approval of my patient."
Jarrod waved a hand in dismissal, "It's nothing like that Thomas and doesn't pertain to anybody in the valley, although I would like to keep whatever information you can give me just between the two of us for the time being."
Thomas' curiosity was piqued as he nodded in agreement. "What do you want to know Jarrod?"
Jarrod fingered the envelope in his jacket pocket, "Could a man suffer such a bad case of amnesia that it would leave him completely without memories of his previous life and family for a number of months before regaining those memories back? And what would cause such a memory loss or those memories to be restored?"
Thomas raised an eyebrow at the question before nodding his head. "You were in the war Jarrod, you saw the aftermath of battle, the wounded in the hospitals, many men who had no idea who they were, how they got there. Yes, it is possible to suffer such a loss, usually as the result of a severe blow to the head or a trauma so demoralising that the mind subconsciously blots out all recollections of the incident for days, weeks, months, years or even a lifetime. How men recover those memories varies also. Some go to sleep and wake up the following morning with all their memories restored. For others, it may be another trauma to the head, or a similar incident to that that caused the amnesia in the first place. In some cases, it could even be as simple as a spoken word, item, smell or gesture. Great inroads have been made into the workings of the mind but a lot is still to be discovered. That's about all I can tell you Jarrod."
Jarrod rose from his chair as Thomas also stood. "That's all the answer I needed, thanks Thomas." Jarrod showed Thomas to the front door, shaking the doctor's hand. "Thanks again Thomas for all your help and information. I'll see you tonight."
Jarrod returned to his study and stood in front of the portrait of his father, "Well I suppose we will have to accept that you really did lose your memory for those four months you were in Strawberry Father, but that doesn't excuse what you did or didn't do on your return." Jarrod turned away from the portrait at the knock on his door.
"You wanted to speak to me Mister Jarrod," Silas asked as he stood in the open doorway.
"Yes please Silas; come in and can you close the door," Jarrod replied as he sat on the edge of his desk and waited for their houseman to join him. Jarrod indicated the chair recently vacated by Thomas Merar. "Take a seat Silas."
"Yes'm Mister Jarrod," Silas replied pensively.
Jarrod smiled, realising that Silas was unsure of why he was asked into the study. "Silas I wanted to ask you a question about my father."
Silas nodded, "Does this have something to do with Miz Barkley, Mister Jarrod?"
"I believe it does Silas and whatever you can tell me, may very well answer a few questions."
"I'll try my best Mister Jarrod, what is it you want to know?"
Jarrod sighed, withdrew the envelope from his jacket pocket and placed it on the desk beside him. "What can you tell me about the time just after my father returned from Strawberry?"
Silas eyes grew wide. "Mister Jarrod, that be between Miz Barkley and Mister Tom. I don't rightly know if I can tell you anything."
"It's alright Silas; let's try this the other way. I'll tell you what I know and you can fill in any details I miss."
"Yes Mister Jarrod."
"I remember some of that time, the arguments and fights after Father returned and how you would take care of Nick and me when Mother and Father were fighting. I know you heard and understood a lot more than I did about that time and I assume you were aware that my father had an affair while he was away in Strawberry."
"It was surely a difficult time Mister Jarrod and I didn't mean to eavesdrop…"
"I know you didn't Silas and I'm not suggesting you did. My father could be very loud when he was angry. You didn't have to eavesdrop to hear what was said."
Silas smiled, "Miz Barkley could be just as loud when her dander was up too. My lord did they have some rows over that other woman. Your mama, she demanded that Mister Tom never set foot in Strawberry again. She was so mad at him for breaking his vows to her. I know she didn't believe him when he told her he had amnesia, at least not at first anyway."
"What do you mean Silas?"
"Well it was maybe twelve months after your daddy returned from Strawberry, he got tossed off a horse he was breaking and was unconscious for a few hours. The doctor came and said he had a concussion and not to worry if there was some slight memory loss but that it would clear in a few days. Your mama, she asked the doctor, Doctor Jacobs I believe it was back then, about amnesia and if it was possible for someone to forget who they were for a few months. He said it was."
Jarrod nodded, that at least agreed with what Thomas had just told him also. "Silas, do you know if father ever returned to Strawberry?"
Silas shook his head, "No Mister Jarrod, he never did, although I know he wanted to but Miz Barkley put her foot down and told him if he ever did then not to bother coming back."
"Do you know why he wanted to go back?"
"I'm not sure Mister Jarrod, but I remember him arguing with Miz Barkley about wanting to check on the woman and make sure she was alright."
God forgive me. I was not naïve, I knew what the possible outcome of your father's affair could lead to, but I implored him to never return to Strawberry, to never have contact with the other woman again.
Jarrod closed his eyes and allowed his posture to sag. His father had wanted to go back, to check on Leah Thomson, check on the possibility of a child but his mother, even knowing the reality of his father's affair, had dismissively ignored that very reality. Or was it that she was afraid to face the possibilities – more than just a child?
"Mister Jarrod, are you alright?" Silas asked worriedly.
Jarrod shook himself and smiled at Silas, "Yes I'm fine, thank you Silas. And thank you for answering my questions. I would appreciate it if you wouldn't mention this discussion with Nick and Audra though."
"I won't say anything Mister Jarrod. If that be all I best be getting back to the kitchen to start preparing lunch before Mister Nick gets to hollering that he's hungry again."
Jarrod laughed "I have no idea where my brother puts all that food he eats."
Authors note: (1) This is an excerpt from a medical paper:
Heart Problems That Go Hand in Hand With StrokesBy Richard N. Fogoros, MD
Updated on November 22, 2020
Medically reviewed by Nicholas R. Metrus, MD
'Heart problems associated with strokes may be caused by the stroke itself, or may be caused by the same underlying process that produced the stroke, most commonly thrombosis (blockage) of an artery. Or, the heart problem may occur first, and the stroke may result from it. This is most often seen when atrial fibrillation produces an embolus to the brain.'
(2) glyceryl trinitrate (GTN), also known as nitroglycerine, is used to alleviate the
symptoms of angina pectoris, and has been used for over 130 years. It was first synthesized by an Italian chemist, Ascanio Sobrero, in 1847