Here we are folks, the final chapter. I hope you enjoy. I'd love to know your thoughts.
/././
"Dude, you have to sleep." Danny put his hand on Steve's shoulder.
Steve turned to study Danny; a flash of amusement lifted him from his stupor. His half grin almost made Danny relax.
"Dude?" Steve asked.
Danny shrugged and said, "It just came out. Want me to call you honey?"
"Honey?" Steve considered this new affectation. "I kinda like that."
"You would."
"You do, too, or you wouldn't have brought it up." Steve tilted his head and gave him a sleepy, slow blink.
"Back to my original statement, babe."
Steve raised his eyebrows. Danny knew he was playing cute to avoid the issue.
"You need to sleep, Steve." He was tempted to begin a lecture about the doctor's continued treatment plan for Steve's PCS, but he held his tongue. Arguing in this place didn't feel right. Especially not this early in the morning.
"I sleep."
"You haven't since we got here." Danny held up his hand and continued, "Nah uh. A nap on the couch doesn't count. I saw you yawning when you were with baking with Charlie."
"I'm ok, Danny. Really. My headaches are mostly gone."
"No, you're not. And that's…ok."
"See, Danny, I'm ok."
"Smart ass."
"No complaints from you."
Danny rolled his eyes. "It's not healthy. It's also freaky to know you're lying beside me. Not sleeping. Watching me."
"I don't watch you all night."
"That's right. You paced the house for a few hours. Grace saw you. Now you're watching the yard."
"She saw me?" Steve gave Danny a worried look.
"She did. She knows you're going through stuff."
"I don't want to worry her."
"Her? What about me?"
This time, Steve rolled his eyes. "I don't want to worry you either."
He leaned in, almost making his mark until Danny moved away.
"Hey, stop. A kiss doesn't fix everything."
Steve nodded and said, "No, no, it doesn't."
He backed away, eyes scanning the room. Danny was sure he was looking for an escape route.
"Whoa, what's going on in that head? We're ok. You and me. I'm worried about you, babe."
"Always." Steve frowned.
"You say it like that's a bad thing."
"It could be. How about this?" Steve was suddenly close again. He tapped Danny's chest and continued, "I worry about you, man. That you might have a stroke. Or a heart attack because you worry about ME so much. You worry about everyone. Everyone but yourself."
Head bowed, Danny couldn't argue. Steve wasn't the only one concerned about Danny's anxiety.
"I'll work on it, alright?" Danny said, "Does that help?"
"Only if you mean it."
"Of course I mean it."
"You better, because I want you around." Steve took Danny's hand and squeezed hard, "I need you."
"I need you, too, babe." Danny felt another I'm sorry coming on. He could see it in Steve's eyes. He had to say something. "I don't want to be the reason you aren't sleeping, Steve."
"Ditto, Danno."
Danny couldn't help it. He let out what could only be called a guffaw, immediately biting his hand to keep from bursting into giggles.
"Too cliché?" Steve leaned in with a whisper.
"Ditto, Danno," Danny repeated, "You're incorrigible. You know I cannot stand that movie."
"What? Ghost is the best." Steve mocked him.
"It's too early for a discussion on how much that movie is not the best." Danny pushed past him, headed for the kitchen. "I need coffee."
/././
"I'm bored, Danno." Charlie said. He crossed his arms and frowned. "There's nothing to do here."
"What happened to the snowman you were building?"
"Uncle Steve knocked it over."
"He did what?" Danny was a mix of surprise and amusement. He looked up from his crossword puzzle, really seeing his son for the first time.
"He knocked Frosty over. His head fell off!"
Danny bit his bottom lip to keep from laughing.
"Danno! It's not funny."
Nodding Danny replied, "I'll have a talk with Uncle Steve."
"Are you gonna kiss him?"
"Wha-" A shocked Danny stammered. Charlie had never asked him any questions about the new dynamics with Steve. Though he knew the day might come, he wasn't ready for it.
"You know. On the lips."
"Well, yea, I - " Danny cleared his throat. His heart raced.
"It's okay. You can kiss him." Charlie said, "He still needs to fix Frosty though."
Little kid logic? There was none. Especially with Charlie. He continued to surprise Danny with his goofy trains of thought.
"I'll make sure he fixes Frosty."
"Good," Charlie answered, "Because he doesn't want to end up on Santa's naughty list."
Charlie ran from the room, giggling. Closing his eyes, Danny caught his breath. His mind went from bored kid to headless snowman to Steve being on Santa's naughty list. He needed a nap.
"Steven," Danny called to his partner and then asked, "What did you do?"
"Do? Me?" Steve wiggled his eyebrows.
Danny ignored the flirting with all his might. "You knocked Frosty's head off?"
Steve wrinkled his nose, taking a second to catch up. Then a full-blown smile bloomed from his eyes. He made a zipping motion across his lips.
"Oh, I see. You're pleading the fifth?"
With a shrug, Steve parked himself at the kitchen table.
"So you wanna be on Santa's naughty list, huh?"
This made Steve lose his cool, and he burst out laughing before saying, "I'm a naughty boy."
"Ew." Grace said. She stood in the doorway. "You two are so gross."
Danny broke into a sweat and his mouth fell open. He uttered indecipherable sounds and pushed his chair back, letting his pen fall on the floor. Steve put his head down and slapped the table.
"You think this is funny, Steven?"
Grace answered for him, "I do, Danno."
She chuckled, looking way too much like an adult who was now in on the joke.
"After what you put me and Will through. And then Terry? I'm definitely milking this!"
"See now you've scarred my daughter."
"Oh dad, whatever."
"Yea dad, whatever." Steve parroted.
"Don't push your luck."
Steve tapped on the closest part of Danny he could reach, which happened to be his knee, still sore from slipping during a snowball battle.
"You better watch out, Uncle Steve. You might end up on the couch tonight." Grace twirled and left the room.
/././
"Don't worry. I'll watch Charlie."
"You sure, Grace?"
"If you ask me that one more time, Danno…"
He took the hint and shut up. A change had come over his daughter. Her confidence level was strong, and he was impressed with her new attitude. Going to a college on the mainland, he supposed, getting out on her own, had been the best thing for her. It was all bittersweet, though, her leaving him. Sure, she'd come and go for holidays and special events, but Grace was no longer his. If she ever was. He couldn't be prouder of her.
Laughter from Steve and a squeal from Charlie punctuated the relative peace of the family room. The late afternoon was quiet but for the crackle of the fire and the occasional gust of wind. Steve and Charlie were drawing pictures and playing cards at the kitchen table. At least that's what Danny thought they were doing. He wasn't sure. Steve had promised to give Danny and Grace some time alone. Especially since Steve had maimed Frosty.
One eyebrow raised, Grace looked at him with growing impatience. He'd been trying to change her mind. And he wasn't sure why. He loved riding horses, and time alone with Steve was a thing he treasured after months away from him.
"You and Steve – that sounds weird – can I keep calling him Uncle Steve?"
"Monkey, you call him whatever you want."
"How about Dad?"
Danny smiled and his eyes burned with the sharp spike of unexpected tears. "Even dad, yea. He'd like that a lot."
"You'd like it, too."
A nod was all he could manage. How did his daughter get so wise and so grownup?
/././
The crunch of the horses' walking through the snow echoed, loud in his ears. His breath hung in the air. The crisp air woke him up, energizing him. The moment electric, yet his heart beat steady and strong. No nerves.
Steve was beside him. Their horses borrowed from the ranch next to Joe's place. Soon to officially be Steve's. The elderly couple had sold the property to Steve, horses and all.
"I have something to tell you."
"Okay," Danny said. He knew what was coming. He'd seen the paperwork on Steve's desk.
"I put you on the deed for the ranch, too. All of this. It's ours. And it'll go to the kids. And Joannie. When we're gone."
"Have you talked to Mary?"
"She loves the idea. We'll have more room in the ranch house. The cabin can be –"
"Your lair. Every super Neanderthal needs one."
"Our lair."
Danny laughed. "Sounds good."
"The team can come, too."
"You'll be okay. With all the traffic out here?"
"We all know how to be discreet, Danny. It's pretty quiet. Plus, I have eyes all over this place. Cameras up and down the lane. People I trust in town."
"You've got it all figured out."
Steve nodded.
"Wow." Danny pointed to the sky. "I just saw a shooting star."
"It's the Leonid meteor shower."
"Well, whatever you call it, it's beautiful."
They watched the heavens for a few minutes as the light show continued. This brief window in the winter storm afforded them the opportunity to finally have some space. And time alone.
"I really feel like Joe's been with me," Steve said. "Is that weird?"
"Not weird. I get it."
Swallowing hard, Steve motioned to the tree beside them, magnificent even in the soft glow from the snow. "This place…"
Danny teared up. He knew without being told why they'd ended up there. It wasn't a random spot.
Steve reached into the small pack he'd brought with them, producing a flask.
"Joe's gift," Steve said.
"Yea."
Steve took a drink, hissing as he wiped his mouth. He held the flask up and said, "To Joe."
He handed the flask to Danny who did the same, repeating, "To Joe."
/././
"Are Danno and Uncle Steve married?"
"No." Grace wanted to say not yet but held back. Lord knows Charlie would blab such info to the world no matter what she said.
"So they don't love each other?"
She wrinkled her nose and sighed. She was working on not rolling her eyes so much around her brother. She loved the little guy and didn't get to see him that much anymore. Grace knelt to his level and looked him in the eyes.
"Danno and Uncle Steve love each other. Like way more than a lot."
"They do?"
"Of course they do."
"But mom and Danno told me they love each other, too." Charlie replied, his eyes uncertain.
Hugging him close, she messed up his hair before releasing him.
"Mom and dad are complicated."
"Complicated?" He frowned. "Like a hard math problem?"
"Exactly like that, kiddo."
"What about Uncle Steve?"
"Totally different."
"He's awesome!" Charlie rolled away from the fire and grabbed his new model airplane. "He made me this!"
Grace shook her head. Her brother was easily distracted. Which was great for her. She grabbed her phone while Charlie buzzed his new toy back forth between the kitchen and the family room.
/././
"I didn't thank you."
"For what?"
Steve locked up the SUV and hurried to Danny's side. He bumped his shoulder, waiting for Danny to respond. Everything seemed kinda dreamy, and Danny felt bad for breaking the spell. But his mind wouldn't stop.
"It's been - what – six years since I lost Matty. And then what I did after," Danny stopped and looked down. He still felt shame for killing Reyes like he did. Even if another part of him relished taking his life. Steve wasn't the only one with monsters lurking inside. "I never thanked you properly."
"Thanked me properly? Danny, you've kept me in line for 10 years. You're my best friend. I hope I'm yours."
"Stop, now you sound silly. You hope I'm your best friend. I wanna roll my eyes but it's too cold."
"Too cold? Have you gone soft, Mr. New Jersey?"
Danny laughed.
Mr. New Jersey. Steve had begun calling him that in bed, telling him to flex his muscles. It was ridiculous but it hit its mark. He'd never live down that calendar.
"I love you, you goof."
"I love you, too, Danno."
Steve took Danny's hand. Their eyes met in the near darkness. Strings of multi-colored lights twinkled, as the trees moved with the breeze. Snow flurries added to the scene. They didn't have to say anything more. Until movement caught Danny's eye, and he tensed.
"Grace is watching?"
"Yea, I bet she's had enough of her brother. That kid –"
"He's great, Danny. They'll be fine."
"You just wanna steal another kiss. You're a –"
Danny meant to say menace but Steve ducked them into the shadows – he knew all the blind spots, after all – and kissed the words out of Danny. Breath control was a definite super power. It came in handy for many things.
/././
His arms held wide, Danny beamed. "This is perfect. Roaring fire. Snow falling. The kids asleep."
"Yea, Danny. It is." Steve looked out the window. Twinkly lights still blinked from the pines in the yard. "Joe would have loved this."
"You know it, babe."
"I'm glad I kept the property."
Danny nodded. He took a sip of his eggnog, let Steve talk. The beverage warmed him. Steve had added an extra shot of cognac to his mug.
"Working here, fixing it up. It's exactly what I needed. Joe was right about this place."
The fire framed Danny's face in light and shadow. Moving just enough to hide the depth of his emotions. Overwhelmed didn't cover what he felt. He'd feared the distance and a few weeks' separation would dampen their feelings. Which was clearly not the case.
"How did you know?" Steve asked. "If you hadn't pushed me."
"I know you," Danny replied, "Joe – he was like a father to you. This place. It's so peaceful. You needed to build happy memories here. It's a great place."
Steve squeezed Danny's hand. "I never did apologize."
"What now?"
They were both on each other about apologizing for everything they'd done. It was as if getting together meant confessing to every sin.
"Not including you. Calling Cath first."
"Babe, you did what you had to do. I get it. I got it then, too. We've been over this." Danny kissed Steve. Which meant shut up in Dannyland. "That's the past. We're here now."
Steve's eyes glistened with tears, and he closed them to calm himself. Danny kept rambling.
"Those bunk beds were a great idea. It's like summer camp for Charlie. Only better since it's Christmas. He wanted you to sleep in the top bunk."
Laughing Steve shook his head. "I wish I had more space. Grace doesn't mind sharing a room with her brother?"
"Nah, not this trip. Might wanna add an addition at some point? Or open up the ranch house."
"I like that. That can be our project for Spring. Invite the team to help?" Steve added, and then lowered his eyes a bit. "And you and me? In one bed. They're okay with it? I bet you're getting lots of questions from Charlie."
Danny smiled at the goof in front of him.
"It's good. In fact, it's awesome. That was Charlie's response."
"Grace?"
"She's over the moon. Not gonna lie. She was mad at you."
"Was?"
"She loves you. That's never changed. She was worried about me. And angry with you for a bit. What you did with her boyfriend? That didn't help."
Steve pressed his lips together. He knew he'd overdone it with that recon expedition.
"I'm sorry, Danny. I'll spend the rest of my life making sure you know that. Grace, too."
"Hey," Danny cleared his throat. "Stop that. How many times do I have to tell you?"
Nodding, Steve got up from his chair and stretched. He was tired and a headache lurked behind his eyes. He was learning to heed the signals. Overdoing it was not an option anymore.
Steve spread out the coals and said, "Fire's going out. I'll add a couple logs."
"I'll check the wood stove. That wind is something fierce tonight. There'll be like five feet of snow by morning."
Steve rolled his eyes. "More like two feet, Danny."
"But who's counting, babe? We're good here. Let's just get this place buttoned up."
"Buttoned up?" Steve said with half a grin.
"Yea, let's tuck everything in for the night."
"I know what buttoned up means. It's funny hearing you say it."
"You've rubbed off on me."
"I'll rub something on you."
"Stop," Danny replied, pushing Steve away playfully.
"I missed you."
"Steven."
"Daniel."
Steve pulled Danny close, rubbing a prominent erection against his leg.
"Be careful with that."
Growling, Steve didn't move.
"You enjoy torturing yourself, don't you? Wait, I take that back. I know you do…and you enjoy doing it to me."
"Doing it?"
Steve's breath on Danny's ear produced the desired effect. Danny shivered and made the best sound before grouching.
"Stop, you animal."
"Grant my Christmas wish."
"I'm afraid to ask what that is, babe." Danny giggled.
Which turned Steve on more.
"I bet you can guess."
"Plenty of time when we get back," Danny paused and threw a wrench in Steve's mood. "You're coming back with us, right?"
Steve sighed, frustrated, but somehow still very content. "Yes Danno. For good. I hired a caretaker. We can come back whenever."
"To find peace."
"Yea, that's the plan. Maybe bring everyone here for a team building exercise."
"That would be – wait – is that what you call helping you renovate the ranch house? Team building exercise, sure. You just want free labor."
"You'll love it. It'll be good for us. For everyone."
"Until then," Danny snuggled in close again and said, "Maybe I can send Grace into town for supplies?
"Supplies? This whole place is stocked." Steve didn't get Danny's drift at first.
"She can take Charlie with her." Danny tilted his head and smiled.
Took him a minute, but Steve got the message. He nodded, "Yea, I can make a list. Supplies, that's what we'll call it."
They fell on to the bed, kissing. Hands all over each other. Tugging on clothes. Squeezing sensitive places.
"I can't believe we waited 10 years to do this," Steve whispered.
Danny grunted and replied, "Shut up the kids will hear."
"But –"
"No talking."
Steve laughed and nodded. Danny seized the opportunity to bit Steve's neck.
"You don't play fair."
"Ssshhh…" Danny shut Steve up with a kiss. He pulled away after a few intense seconds. "Merry Christmas, Steve."
"Merry Christmas, honey."
/././
Thank you for reading. Until the next ride…this one has come to an end.