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As Brooks and the clone disappeared through the doors of the Archives, both Wrex and Kaidan looked at Shepard. "What's the plan?"
She thought longingly of the hot tub in the apartment, of the soft, comfortable bed, of just going to sleep and letting someone else deal with all the galaxy's weirdness for the day. But that day wasn't today. Sighing, she said, "You guys see if you can figure out what they did with the others. I'm going to call Joker."
Without waiting for an answer, she punched the comm button in her collar, moving toward the back of the room for better reception. "Joker, watch your ship. They're coming."
"Yeah, well, we've got bigger problems than that. EDI's offline. The ship's not going anywhere." Joker's voice was sharp with concern. "What's been going on down there?"
"I'll … tell you later. I think EDI's fine—she may have taken herself offline."
"You think? You don't know? Shepard—"
"It's a little complicated, Joker! When I figure it out, I'll let you know. Just—be careful."
"Always." He clicked off, and she returned to the others.
Kaidan was frowning at the screen in front of him while Wrex threatened to smash the terminal to pieces if it didn't cough up the information he wanted. "Shepard, didn't we used to win these things in the old days?"
"Only when it came down to the wire, Wrex, and we're not there yet." She raised her voice. "Glyph!"
The little bot appeared in front of her. "Yes, Commander?"
"Find the others, will you?"
"Of course, Commander." It disappeared into the storage system.
"That easy, huh, Shepard?" Kaidan asked.
"Just … thinking outside the box. Computers and files work sometimes, but they're limited and linear. Glyph, on the other hand …" She gestured as it reappeared.
"I have found them, Commander."
"Are they okay?"
"They appear angry, Spectre Alenko, but otherwise unharmed."
"They should be angry." Wrex chuckled. "And embarrassed."
"Glyph, can you call the vaults they're sealed in back so we can get everyone out, please?"
"Of course, Commander."
And in due course—longer than Shepard had hoped—the others were standing in front of her, shame-faced and irritated. Vega was carrying EDI's limp form.
"She had me shut her down so the ship couldn't be stolen," Tali explained.
"Good thinking. Joker's having a fit, though."
"It was Brooks, wasn't it?" Liara asked, shaking her head. "I should have known."
"We can beat ourselves up about it later," Shepard told her. "Right now, they're trying to take our ship."
"That is not happening," Cortez vowed grimly.
"Great. Let's go." Shepard led the way toward the doors.
Outside the Archives, Emily Wong was waiting for them. "Shepard, you don't live a boring life."
"No, but sometimes I wish I did. You get some good footage?"
"Enough to prove which one is you and which is the clone, I think." Emily studied her carefully. "It's a good likeness, but not perfect. Anyone who's ever looked you in the eye could tell the difference."
Shepard smiled. "Thanks. That might be the nicest thing I've heard all day."
As they spoke, a skycar came to a stop next to them. The doors slid open, and Joker looked worriedly out at them, his eyes widening as he spotted EDI's body. "What happened?"
"She had Tali take her out of commission to save the ship," Shepard explained, seating herself beside him. "Tali, leave EDI here so no one can use her against us and come with me. I might need you. Kaidan, you, too."
The two of them settled themselves in the back of the car as the others grumbled about being left behind.
"I wanted to go," Wrex pouted.
Javik crossed his arms over his chest, all of his eyes glaring. "As did I. Fifty thousand years later, and I still rarely get picked."
"Joker will come back for you all, I promise."
"Or I can commission another set of skycars," Liara said, calling up her omni-tool. "Go on, Shepard, save the Normandy. I'll take care of things here."
Shepard blessed Liara's competence as the doors slid closed and Joker took off. "I don't like it," he muttered.
"What? EDI? Or the Normandy?"
"Either one. But mostly the damned clone. You think they made more of them?"
"I don't want to talk about it!" Shepard snapped, her voice unusually loud in the small car.
He focused on the screen in front of him. "This is why I hate shore leave. I swear, you park the ship for five minutes …"
As they touched down in front of the Normandy, an indignant Traynor stood waiting. She marched up to Shepard, waving a toothbrush in her face. "You have some nerve, dismissing me for conduct unbecoming and barely giving me enough time to grab my tooth … brush …" Her voice trailed off, and she frowned. "Wait, but … you're on the ship. How can you be on the ship, and …"
"A clone," Tali explained matter-of-factly as she climbed out of the skycar. "Honestly, when you serve on the Normandy long enough, you get used to things like this."
"You do?" Kaidan echoed doubtfully.
"That's what happens when you skip the suicide mission," Tali told him.
"I'll consider that more carefully next time."
"If I have my way, there won't be a next time," Shepard said to both of them. "No more suicide missions, no more clones, just … everything normal."
"Do you even know what that word means, Shepard?"
She glanced at Tali. "I don't want to talk about it. Why don't you figure out how to get me on to my ship?"
"Yes, Commander. I'm on it." Tali focused on Traynor's toothbrush. "Is that a Cision Pro Mark 4?"
"It is, in fact."
"Great. Bring it. I can use it."
"But … my toothbrush …" Traynor protested, even as she was following Tali.
Left alone, Kaidan put a comforting hand on Shepard's shoulder. "It's almost over."
"Is it? We win today, and then tomorrow we're back at it, fixing everyone's messes, watching our worlds be decimated by the Reapers …"
He took her firmly by both shoulders. "No. We win today, and tomorrow we relax on the couches in that big apartment. We watch some vids, we eat some good food, we try out that glass shower." Kaidan smiled, his eyes warming at the thought. "And when we're rested, we get out there and we take down the Reapers once and for all."
"I wish I believed that."
"Don't worry. The rest of us will believe for you as long as it takes."