Poppa Dork PG-13
Niklas "Hawk" Jonsson

Summary: When Seta one day doesn't manage to beat the odds piled against him, Keitaro is stunned to realize that the eccentric archealogist has left everything to his young protegee. Including Sarah and Nyamo! Keitaro now finds himself a single father, trying to live his life and taking care of his new job, while raising his young 'daughters'.

Disclaimer: Love Hina, Hinata Sou and whatnot are not mine, though I certainly wish they were. The story is mine though, all mine. This story deals with some very unpleasant things. If this disturbs you, don't read.
If the layout looks screwy or symbols seems to be missing, you're probably reading the quickedit-mangled version of this fic on ff dot net, if it grates on your nerves too much, read it on hawksgalaxy dot com or something.

Feedback/Flames: Yes, please. Both of them are equally fun to read, although I must admit that I greatly prefer the first variety. :)
I can be found on ICQ as 21771860, MSN Messenger/E-mail as iamhawk at yahoo dot com, though not very frequently as real life lately interferes with my online existance more then I'd like. More stories are available at my nifty lil' site at hawksgalaxy dot com or by clicking on my handle up above.

"speech"
emphasis/shouts/Kindred Domination/post-hypnotic triggers
/thoughts/
/telepathy/
translation
+soundeffect/radio/telephone conversation/TV+

Previously, on 'Poppa Dork'

"What do you guys think?" Keitaro asked, looking around the table.

"I told you, Keitaro. This isn't about them. It's about you and her. Nobody else." Haruka interjected before anyone could reply. "This isn't a decision you should make based on what anyone else thinks. It should be all about you and Sarah. You can ask for input, of course. But you shouldn't put too much stock in whatever is said by anyone who isn't Sarah."

"I... I guess you're right." Keitaro responded and sighed, shaking his head.

"Who's the new kid?" Kaolla asked, the only one who had seen Nyamo so far. "She looks like Shinobu!"

"That's Namo Nyamo. Her grandfather used to work with Seta, but went missing some time ago. Seta was taking care of her, as they searched for her grandfather. Her only living relative is an Aunt, who's in the hospital recovering from surgery right now, so I'm taking care of her for now." Keitaro explained. "If... If things don't work out all right anyway, Seta asked me to adopt her as well." he revealed, causing another round of gasps and shocked exclamations. "I'll be in my room, thinking... About all this. Try not to disturb me unless it's important, please? And... And look after Sarah and Nyamo, please?"

"Of course, Keitaro." Haruka replied, nodding and focusing a stern look at everybody around the table. "Right?" she asked and got a chorus of 'Yes, of course!' in response.

"Thanks everybody." he said, then made his way to his room. He had a lot to think about before he would be ready to talk to Sarah and Nyamo about it.

Roll credits

Chapter Two:

"Hey."

Keitaro blinked several times, then slowly raised his head to the infamous hole-in-the-ceiling that had been the cause of so many wondrous encounters of the unclad kind and following painful experiences since he became the manager of Hinata Sou. Currently, Naru's head and shoulders were sticking down out of the hole, her hair hanging down in a straight line towards his floor.

"Hey." he added and stretched, raising his arms and worked out a few kinks he hadn't even been aware of until Naru had interrupted his ponderings. "What can I do for you, Narusegawa?" he asked politely.

"I wanted to ask you if you're really seriously considering Sarah's adoption?" Naru asked after a few moments of quiet observation, an unusually serious look on her face which looked really out of place with her being upside down from Keitaro's perspective.

"Of course I'm considering it seriously. There's no way I could do otherwise." Keitaro responded. "But if you want to know if I've made up my mind yet, then the answer is no." he finished with a tired sigh.

"Keitaro!" Naru exclaimed, then dropped down into his room, grabbing hold of the edge of the hole to spin herself into an upright position, before dropping to the floor. "If you become a single father, how do you expect to handle your studies?" she demanded to know.

"I won't be studying if I do decide to adopt, Narusegawa." Keitaro replied after a few moments. "Then I'll try to find a job or perhaps turn the dorm back into a hotel again. Something that gives me a steady income. Without that, I probably won't be allowed to adopt in the first place."

"B-but what about ou... I mean, what about your promise to meet up with your childhood friend at Todai?" Naru asked, almost having asked 'What about our promise to get into Todai together?' before she caught herself and altered her statement.

She didn't even want to think about him even considering changing the Hinata Sou back into a hotel. There was no way her parents would allow her to stay on if he did that. No way. So, she turned her attention away from that, trying to bury that unpleasant possibility somewhere deep inside the murky depths of her mind, alongside with all her other deepest rooted fears.

"Narusegawa... We're talking about the lives of one or two children here, if I am going to adopt, I'll do my best to be a good father. The promise... I can't allow myself to care about that. I will have to push that aside and instead focus on Sarah and/or Nyamo, make sure that their needs are being met, before I can start to worry about one of mine. One that in the long run, perhaps doesn't even matter all that much."

"Doesn't even matter all that much!" Naru exclaimed, shrinking back from Keitaro. The Keitaro she knew, would never have uttered such a statement. Whoever this was just couldn't be her Keitaro. Some sort of fake, perhaps? Maybe Kaolla had decided to build a Mecha-Keitaro instead of a new Mecha-Tama?

"Yes." Keitaro simply replied. "It feels as if this is the first time in years that I've been able to think clearly. Having something of real substance, a serious issue to focus on, have allowed me to see for myself just how insignificant my previous dreams have been." he continued absently, a serious and faintly distracted expression on his face. "Get into Todai? Fine, an admirable goal if it's done for the right reasons. In order to get a good education, so one can get a good job later on in life. But the reason why I tried to get in? To meet up with some girl I can't even remember the name of? A girl I can meet anyway, probably just by asking grandma, Haruka, dad or mom if they remember who else stayed at the Hinata Inn around the same time as I did. It's ridiculous, I never even considered just asking someone for her name before. Like I said, it feels like I'm able to think clearly for the first time since my childhood years." he revealed and smiled sadly at Narusegawa.

"Perhaps that is why I had such a hard time studying. While my goal was to reach Todai, the reason I aimed for it wasn't to study there, like yours. Since Todai for me was more of a means, then a goal in itself, perhaps I subconsciously dismissed studying as unnecessary. I don't really know for sure, but it is possible." Keitaro revealed and indicated an opened algebra book lying next to him. "I had a look through it a while earlier, it doesn't seem nearly as hard as it once used too."

"Keitaro... You can't become a father! You're too young!" Narusegawa protested.

"Dad was eighteen when I was conceived. Mom was sixteen. I'm older now then any of them were when they got me." Keitaro countered. "You've got pretty young parents yourself, don't you?"

"Keitaro, you don't have the faintest clue about parenting. How do you think you'll be able to handle raising someone like Sarah? Or Nyamo? Nyamo isn't that much younger then you are, for Kami's sake!" Naru ranted on.

"I know." Keitaro replied and nodded seriously. "It's just eight years separating Nyamo and me. It's not an easy decision." he mused and rose from the ground, striding off to the window where he looked out at the green hillside surrounding the Hinata Sou and the man-made buildings surrounding this lush green oasis he now called home.

"It is! Just say no, you can't possibly adopt either one of them!" Naru snapped.

"Before Seta died, I would have agreed with you right away." Keitaro calmly replied, acknowledging all his former faults as he did so. He was too hasty, he was clumsy, way too easily excitable, focused on all the wrong things, he was too impulsive and only rarely thought things through as he should have. So many of the mishaps he'd suffered through could have been solved if he'd just stopped to think for a few moments. Many others could have been avoided if he'd just learned to speak up for himself at some point in his past life. Many others, if he'd showed a bit of restraint at the time. Looking back on his whole life as he did now and had been for the last couple of hours, he found himself loathing how he had acted in the past.

/Geesh, Naru was right when she called me immature./ he reasoned. /No matter what I decide to do, I have to start acting my age instead of just panicking my way through the rest of my life as I have up until now./

"But now, the girls don't have the luxury of me making a snap decision like that. I will have to carefully consider every possible angle before making my decision. It's the lives of two young girls that are at stake here, after all." he continued and sighed morosely as he kept on contemplating the situation, circumstances and what to do about them. "Sarah has horrible relatives, apparently. If I don't take her in, she might wind up with them, or else she might be shipped off to America and a foster home there, being raised by people she'll never have met before. If I take her in, at least she'll have somewhat familiar faces around her and she'll be allowed to stay here in Japan." Keitaro explained.

"Nyamo is somewhat better off, as her Aunt is a wonderful person. But she's just been through surgery and is in no position to take care of Nyamo at the moment. There's also the issue of her missing grandfather, Nyamo wants to keep on searching for him. But he's gone missing on Parakeese, which isn't exactly a touristy place. Just about the only outsiders who ever go there, are excavators, archaeologists, their various assistants and people with their own boats. I might be able to get a job as an assistant on some dig, as I'm already familiar with the area and the work there. I can take Nyamo there, hardly anyone else could offer Nyamo such an opportunity." he finished with a far-away look in his eyes, still looking out through the window.

"But how are you going to provide for them, Keitaro?" Naru demanded. "They're two growing young girls. They need clothes, food, education, health care and thousands of other little things. Even if you could get a job as an assistant somewhere, that would mean that you would have to travel off to some dig, leaving Sarah and Nyamo on their own back here!"

"I know." Keitaro agreed and sighed. "A decision is still far far off, I fear."

"Mouuuuuuuuu! Keitaro, you idiot!" Naru growled, then slugged Keitaro across the room before she strode out through the door, muttering angrily to herself.

"Owie..." Keitaro whimpered in the corner of the room he'd wound up in, standing on his head and shoulders, with the rest of his body leaning up against the wall.

+Knock+Knock+Knock+

"'ey, Keitaro."

Keitaro turned around and nodded in recognition as Kitsune strolled into his room, closing the door behind her as she sashayed over to the table he was seated at, plunking herself down opposite him and putting a bottle of brandy down in the middle of the table.

"Hey, Kitsune. To what do I owe this honour?" Keitaro asked, observing his inscrutable tenant with a gaze that shifted between curious and apprehensive, wondering what she might have up her sleeve.

"Figured ya'd need a drink right about now." she responded and nodded at the bottle. "How're things coming along?" she asked.

"Naru sent you to talk me out of this, eh?" Keitaro asked with a faint smile.

"Naw. Seeing how Naru stormed out of the building an hour ago, I guessed that she'd been here to see ya, but she didn't stop for long enough for me to ask what she'd gotten outta ya, if anything." Kitsune replied. "So. Seeing as how she got so upset and seeing as how I didn't manage to track her down when I looked for 'er, I figured that I should see how ya're holding out through all o' this."

"Well enough." Keitaro replied evasively. "How are Sarah and Nyamo? I feel a little bad about just locking myself away like this, but..." he started, but trailed off, not finding the words to finish his sentence.

"Sarah's still asleep. Kaolla's showing Nyamo some of her inventions to keep her entertained." Kitsune replied only to hold her hands up in a warding gesture as Keitaro seemed about to leap into a running position and dash out of the room. "Haruka is keeping an eye on what Kaolla brings down from her room to show Nyamo. Nothing that goes 'boom' or has any sharp edges. Though I think Haruka does it more to keep herself busy then out of any real concern." Kitsune added, which served to significantly calm Keitaro down and get him out of his agitated state.

Kaolla was a sweet girl, truly. She wouldn't intentionally harm a fly.

Problem was, she seemed to have no idea whatsoever just what could harm those around her and could cause a great deal of it without really meaning to.

Sorta.

Well, who knew?

Sure, he'd been kicked, punched, shot at, tied up and nearly been blown up by her, but he could survive that sort of thing. The others couldn't and she never seemed to play quite that rough with them. So perhaps she did know exactly what could harm those around her and made damn sure to never quite cross that line, even if she certainly skirted the edge of it from time to time.

/There's just no way of telling with her./ he reasoned.

"Well, that's a relief." Keitaro sighed with relief as he sunk down into a comfortable slouch again, recrossing his legs.

"Probably overkill anyway, she hasn't even tried to bring out any of the big guns yet." Kitsune shrugged. "She seems a bit more mellow then usual." she added and Keitaro nodded. Kaolla had seemed sort of subdued since he returned, apparently even she took death seriously, something he almost would have doubted previously. Before now, he wouldn't have believed it if anybody had told him that Kaolla could be serious or sombre while fully awake. Sleeping or when she was tired was another thing, but the times when she was awake and didn't have a huge grin on her face and some dangerous invention nearby were few and far between. "So, we've got time. How're ya really holding up?"

"I could probably use a shot or two from that, to tell the truth." Keitaro eventually admitted, nodding at the bottle, but he signed for her to remain seated as she prepared to stand up and fetch a couple of glasses. "But I don't think it's a good idea for me to drink right now." he explained and Kitsune shrugged, accepting his calm declaration without protest.

"'Sent you to talk me out of this', eh?" Kitsune said instead, tilting her head as she considered him. "So, I guess that means that ya've decided to go ahead and do it?"

"No. But the fact that I was even considering it seemed to upset Naru." Keitaro replied with a sad little frown. "She's a little difficult to understand at times." he admitted with a sigh.

"Not really." Kitsune countered. "She's easy to figure out, at least once one knows her as well as I do." she added and smiled sadly. "She's worried, Keitaro. She's always been very concerned about what others think and feel about her. When she first hit puberty and started developing the body you've been drooling over since you first met her, people started treating her differently. Girls got envious over her beauty and boys lost their heads over it. She lost a couple of good friends over it and the boys who were into her almost never cared about her as a person, only how good she looked."

"Then, came that whole mess with her parents and her new little sister and Naru left to go here, because she felt like an outsider in her own family. She's wrong of course, but she believed that she wasn't wanted, that her new family only cared about Mei-chan. Then she met up with Seta and got hooked on him, which didn't exactly improve matters. She had the hugest crush on him and he never noticed, or at least never let on if he did. Then along came you..." Kitsune continued and smiled. "You got all hung up on her looks as well and she was probably prepared to dismiss you as just another pervert, but you've shown time and time again that you're not just interested in her because of her looks. You're actually interested in her as a person as well."

Kitsune smiled and leaned back, putting her hands down on the ground behind her and resting her weight on those as she observed her now attentive listener.

"She'll probably deny it until the day she dies, but she is interested in you, Keitaro. Very interested. I can tell." she continued and grinned. "You may or may not have noticed this, as you can be a bit air headed most of the time, but she gets really jealous about you. Since you're the first boy who's ever been interested in her as a person, she's very concerned and possessive about your feelings for her. That's been the situation up until now. While she may not have shown it all that often, she's thrilled that you like her for what she is, not what she looks like. The girl who believes that she's unlovable and that nobody wants her around, has finally found somebody who does." she added and then grew serious. "And now, you've got something else to focus on. Something that isn't her or the goal you two have in common. She's worried that you'll loose interest in her, that you'll forget all about her. That she'll go back to being the unloved one." Kitsune announced and leaned forward again, resting her hands on her knees.

"That's what's going on with her, Keitaro. She's afraid of loosing you." Kitsune finished.

"Wow." Keitaro mumbled, completely awed at what Kitsune had just revealed.

"Like I said, she's not that hard to figure out once you know her as well as I do." Kitsune replied with a faint shrug.

"Thanks for telling me, Kitsune." Keitaro told his squinty-eyed friend.

"Nae bother. I figured you should know, so you won't let worry over Naru distract you from deciding what to do about Sarah and Nyamo." Kitsune replied.

"You're a good friend, Kitsune." Keitaro told her with a friendly smile.

"Tsh." Kitsune shrugged it off, feeling a bit uncomfortable with getting compliments. "I just want you to make the right decision for the right reasons. No kid deserves having their future being decided by a clouded and distracted mind."

"Like yours was?" Keitaro asked and Kitsune stiffened, her eyes opening fully as she stared silently at him. "I didn't mean to pry about it and I am sorry for it. But... Your father came here once." he revealed and Kitsune gasped, shrinking back and trembling as her eyes swivelled back and fourth, like she was a trapped animal looking for an escape route. "You weren't here then, but he hung around for a while and talked a bit with me before he left."

"You... Talked with my father?" Kitsune asked, swallowing nervously and wondering why her voice sounded so strained, so squeaky. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"He asked me to keep silent about it and at the time, I thought that was the right thing to do." Keitaro replied and sighed, looking down at the ground. "Like many of my other previous decisions, it's one I've come to reconsider over the last couple of hours." he admitted and let out another sigh. "He misses you, Kitsune."

"Yeah, right! I'm sure he does, the bastard!" Kitsune snarled and grabbed the bottle on the table, opening it and drinking straight from the bottle.

"He's laid off drinking, Kitsune." Keitaro revealed which caused Kitsune to gasp in shock and stare at him with a flabbergasted expression for a couple of seconds, before she snorted in disbelief.

"Yeah, for a week or two, until he can earn, borrow or steal enough cash to buy himself more to drink!" she snapped and took another large gulp straight from the bottle.

"He said that he's been clean for fifteen months. That was three months ago." Keitaro revealed and Kitsune gasped again.

"Fifteen mon... No... No way. He must be lying. There's no way he could have... No. No way." Kitsune spluttered.

"I only know what he told me." Keitaro admitted. "But he knows that he's done you wrong and he misses you, Kitsune. You don't have to do it, but perhaps you should at least consider calling him sometime."

"No... No, I don't... No." Kitsune stuttered, unable to finish a complete sentence, but still managing to make it fully understood that she was unwilling to even consider it despite her current linguistic difficulties.

"Think about it sometime. Preferably when you're sober. That's all I ask. Just like no kid deserves to have their future decided by a drunk, a parent deserves the same." Keitaro said, pointedly looking at the bottle in Kitsune's hand.

"I'm not a drunk!" she protested.

"Something upset you and the first thing you do, is reach for the booze." Keitaro responded. "Like I said, I've come to regret many decisions I've made after thinking about my life these last couple of hours. Not getting on your case because of your drinking habits, is one of them. Consider the rest of this week your grace period, Kitsune. Starting next week, I won't allow you to set a bad example to the others any longer. If you can't get your drinking under control, I'll have to do something about it."

"What!" Kitsune exclaimed, leaping up onto her feet and glaring down at Keitaro. "Keep your big nose out of my business! What I do or don't is no business of yours."

"As long as you live here, I'm making it my business, Kitsune." Keitaro informed her and stood up, calmly facing her down. "Naru is grown enough to make her own decisions and handle the outcome of your decisions. But there's Shinobu, Kaolla and Motoko to consider as well. Not to forget Sarah and/or Nyamo, if I do decide to adopt. I won't have you setting a bad example to any of them anymore."

"And what are you going to do about it, you wimp! Throw me out?" Kitsune laughed.

"If I have to." Keitaro calmly replied, drawing a shocked gasp from Kitsune who staggered back away from Keitaro with a stunned expression on her face.

"What! You'd throw me out!" Kitsune exclaimed.

"I would prefer it if it didn't come to that." Keitaro said and calmly made his way over to Kitsune, putting his right hand on her left shoulder. "You're a friend, Kitsune. A good friend. I should have done something about this ages ago, instead of just letting you keep on ruining your life like you have." he said and pulled her against his chest, wrapping his arms around her. "You won't be alone. I'll be next to you every step of the way, you can count on that. But I will not let you keep on drinking here like you have before and that's a promise you can take to the bank." he finished in a firm voice, letting her know that there was no way in hell he was budging on that point.

"But..." Kitsune started to protest, but couldn't find the words as she stood there, leaning against him with her arms held limply at her sides, the bottle still gripped tightly in her right hand as Keitaro rocked her back and forth.

She didn't understand why he did that, or why he kept on telling her that things would be all right, until she noticed that she was soaking his sweater with her tears.

The End! ( For now... )