Storms have been plaguing the village for a months, and while all of the villagers complain of ruined crops I have been basking in joy. I love the rain and everything that comes along with these storms. There are no chores to be done during a rain, no one walks the streets, no one visits, and I am left alone with my thoughts. Normally I don't have a second to myself, I can not enjoy a walk without interruption and by the time night rolls around I am so drained from daily work that gazing up at the stars isn't even an option. So a heavy rain meant I could finally have a moment moment to breathe.
Gazing out of my hut I couldn't help but admire the the beauty of the rain, it was ever so deceiving, just like him. The rain makes such noise upon roofs, and it falls from the sky looking like shards of diamond. Rain, although beautiful like a diamond, is not hard like one. When it hits the ground it turns into a puddle, a puddle of water that one could easily run their hands through, a delicate liquid. Sesshomaru was like the rain, and as I looked up at the sky I could only think of him. The only downside to these storms was that all I had to think about was him, and how I longed to be at his side again traveling the lands and poking fun of Jaken. When Sesshomaru dropped me off here to stay I felt a betrayal that I had never felt in my life, and even though years have passed I still feel the betrayal so deeply. I rarely see him now, only a few times a year when he comes to bring a present. He used to come often, but as the years went on the visits slowed. Sometimes I feel forgotten, but what am I to say, he doesn't owe me anything, it is I who owes him everything. I am a woman now and it is up to me to live a life of one, to marry and bare children, but deep down I don't want any of it. If it means I can't see him, or be near him, then my life will always be empty because no matter how much I've tried to deny it, I love him. I wonder often if he knows deep down what I feel, but sometimes I'm convinced he looks at me as nothing but a comrade. While I sat in a daze thinking of my Lord Sesshomaru, he appeared before my hut, standing in the rain as if there were none at all. It wasn't a surprise, he often showed up just when he was occupying my thoughts, almost like he could read my mind. "Sesshomaru please come in." He didn't say a word but followed behind me as I knew he would. We walked into my mostly bare hut and as I started a fire, he sat down Indian style, still in silence. "What brings you by Lord Sesshomaru? It's late out, you must have expected me to be asleep." He responded to me, his beautiful face never changing expression. "I have seen you staying up late much of this month, watching the rain. I knew you would be awake." I sat down across from him, the fire burning between us. "Sesshomaru you must stop spying from the forest, it is most intrusive." I giggled. The corner of his lip slightly twitched, and I knew he had found what I said humorous. I gazed upon his face and I so longed to know what he was thinking, and what the purpose of this was at all. He could have dropped me off at this village and not bothered with me further but he has spent almost seven years visiting me, and always we sit in silence like this unless I force a conversation. This time, on this rainy night, I can no longer stay silent. It's never been in my nature to hold back unless dealing with him, and on this night I need answers from him. My friend, my companion, my protector.
"Lord Sesshomaru I want to talk to you." I whispered.
His eyes locked with mine and he nodded. "Rin you may always speak in my presence."
I slightly smiled looking away from his gaze. "No that is not what I mean, I want to talk to you about important things. Things we have never spoken of, if not but only in silence. Please give me this great honor and answer my questions, open your heart to me this once, truly let me know what has been going on in your mind since that faithful day I found you in the forest."
Sesshomaru looked away closing his eyes. "Rin stop being silly."
My face became red, but my determination only grew. "Please do not treat me as a child a moment longer, I am a woman now. While it is I who owe you my life please give me this honor for the undying loyalty I have shown to you my Lord. Please I beg you because I can't go on like this any longer!" I shouted.
He opened his eyes with a solemn expression as he stared back at me, almost as if he thought he was going to lose something, "I will answer whatever it is you want to know." In that moment I too felt like I may be losing something.