She Don't Dream for Me

By: caramelo

I do not own One Tree Hill or anything related to it.

Chapter Eleven: Alienation

Surprisingly, it didn't take long to check Lucas in, and the wait in the waiting room wasn't too long, although it might have seemed longer because of the uncomfortable silence that had settled over all of them. Brooke tried not to think of how she would have acted a few weeks ago, probably bouncing off the walls and cajoling Lucas into playing with the kids' toys, sharing with him how each and every one of them could be used for something dirty. He probably would have blushed, but laughed too, and shut her up with a kiss. He had always been good at that.

The door to the examining room hall opened. "Lucas Scott?" a nurse called from the doorway. "Darcy" her name tag proclaimed. She was young and pretty, Brooke noted listlessly, with soft brown curls and warm eyes of matching color. Her makeup was done perfectly, while Brooke knew her own was half done and had been smudged at some point, probably while flying into the ditch.

"Right here," Lucas raised a hand in greeting, rising up from beside Brooke. A scowl marred Brooke's features as she recognized the glimmer of attraction in his eyes as he walked over to the nurse.

She smiled. Of course her teeth looked like they had been brushed with bleach every morning, mockingly reminding Brooke of her short encounter with Jeremy Ronz. Brooke tried to expel his name from her mind, but for some reason she couldn't forget the way she had let him paw at her. It had been fun at the time, but now? Now, it made her feel even worse.

A glimmer again from the nurse caused a fresh bout of annoyance to wash over Brooke again. She probably had some type of surgery for that, Brooke reassured herself, so did he. "Right this way," Darcy directed, still flashing those blinding teeth of hers. "My name's Darcy."

Lucas nodded, already well aware. So was pretty much everyone else there. Did she not realize she had a freaking name tag? To Brooke's chagrin, however, he did not seem to share this annoyance with her. "Lucas," he introduced himself, giving her an equally bright smile.

They disappeared behind the door, chattering amicably.

"So I'm thinking that woman could be a cover model for Crest Whitestrips," Brooke whispered to Nathan.

Nathan looked up from his magazine, a sports one naturally, but appeared to be uninterested. "I didn't notice," he shrugged before immersing himself back in whatever article he was reading about whoever was the big basketballstar of the month.

"You couldn't have missed it," Brooke persisted. "She could have lit up the New Year's apple alone."

"Sorry," Nathan said shortly. He didn't even glance up this time.

Brooke didn't have a lot of patience today.

"Why is it," she snapped, her lips inches away from his ear, "that everybody has to have a fucking problem always?"

Nathan shot her a look. So did some old lady, but Brooke didn't care about her. She had gotten the attention she wanted finally.

"Maybe we ought to talk outside," Nathan suggested.

"I guess we should," Brooke said, appeased.

Nathan rolled his eyes and pushed himself out of the low seated waiting room chair, and Brooke did the same. He crossed the room in a few short steps, leaving Brooke to hurry after.

"You could have at least waited," Brooke glared as she stepped out onto the sidewalk.

Nathan ignored her. "Why are we even out here?"

"You wanted to be," Brooke said.

"Only because you were getting all pissed with me." Nathan looked pretty annoyed.

"Only because you were acting like an ass," Brooke retorted.

"Well, it's not like you had to go and hang all over Lucas right in front of me," he grumbled.

Brooke glanced up at him sharply. "Why would that matter?" As an afterthought, she added, "And I wasn't hanging either."

"Yeah, you were," Nathan said darkly.

Brooke rolled her eyes. "Fine. Whatever. Like I said, why would it even matter?"

"It didn't," Nathan answered quickly.

It was very possible that she could have simply been imagining it, but Brooke could have sworn Nathan's cheeks were heating up. A smile came to her face. It was such an unusual look for him, but it was oddly…cute, Brooke thought, very.

Abruptly, she jerked her gaze away. Those were not thoughts she should be having.

"Bull," Brooke challenged without thinking. The seconds passed after her outburst, and she wished she could grab that stupid word back. Why couldn't she ever just leave well enough alone?

Nathan gave her an exasperated look. Obviously, he was thinking the same thing too. Brooke was ready to apologize and tell him to forget she said anything, when he sighed and began to speak.

"You could be right," he said. He paused for a moment, but Brooke didn't press him. She wasn't sure if she wanted to hear what he had to say. "It shouldn't have bothered me," Nathan continued, "but I guess it did. In a way."

Brooke cocked her head to the side, and Nathan tried not to swallow when she took a few tentative steps closer. "But why?" she asked, her voice soft.

Nathan shrugged. That was the part that bothered him the most. He couldn't just come out and say why he didn't like the sight of her eyes following Lucas's every move, her breath catching whenever Lucas came close to her. He couldn't just come out and say that her never-ending adoration of Lucas made him so…He just couldn't. But he had to get her away from Lucas. He couldn't stand seeing them together anymore.

"We talked about this, Brooke," he said instead. "It just pisses me off that you go crawling back to Lucas after everything. It's so pathetic, and you don't even seem to realize it. It's like to you, Lucas is some sort of God that deserves your worship. It's sick."

Somewhere, in the back of his mind, Nathan was aware of how harsh his words were. He was aware of Brooke's falling face and her dulling, bleary eyes—a sure sign of tears. But the thoughts just weren't registering yet. His cold rant continued, fueled by his irrational desire to make sure Brooke stayed well away from Lucas from now on.

"I thought you deserved better, Brooke," Nathan eventually finished, "but if you keep throwing yourself at him every time he walks in the room, then maybe you don't."

A cold silence met his words. When his eyes finally came into focus on Brooke's lashes desperately blinking back tears, the reality of what just happened set in. "Jesus," he muttered, "Brooke, I…"

"No," Brooke cut him off. Her voice was surprisingly clear and unwavering. "I get it already, okay? You're right."

"Brooke," Nathan protested.

"Nathan, just stop," Brooke said. Her tone was cold, and her face was set, but he could still see tears threatening to fall. "I know I've been acting pretty pathetic lately. I just…I don't know, but you're completely right. I really just need to get over my hang up with Lucas and move on. Thanks for helping me see that."

Accomplishing his goal didn't feel nearly as good as Nathan imagined it would. He reached for Brooke's arm to try and explain himself, try and apologize for what an ass he was, but Brooke took a quick step back.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, something he should have been saying, and turned on her heel, walking away from him quickly. By the time he realized what was going on, she was already halfway across the parking lot.

"Where are you going?" he yelled after her.

"Home," came Brooke's tart reply.

Nathan shook his head, but she had her back turned to him. "You don't have a car."

Brooke bristled. "I can walk," she said acidly, "I'm getting really good at that."

Grimacing, Nathan made a move to go after her, but Brooke seemed to have already anticipated this. "Don't even bother," she said, without turning, "You have to stay with Lucas."

He froze. Lucas. Shit. He looked at his watch. Lucas's examination was probably already over by now. But Brooke…Nathan shook his head as he looked at her rapidly fading figure. As long as he sped things up inside, he could probably catch up with her in his car.

He took another glance at her, already a good amount of feet away from where he had last seen her.

Maybe.

Brooke tried to hold onto her angered thoughts for as long as she could, but they were already giving way to the hurt she felt. She wiped at her eyes, frustrated. Had Nathan really meant all those awful things he had said to her?

Why wouldn't he? A voice in Brooke's head taunted nastily. It was all the truth.

Shamed as she was to admit it, Brooke couldn't help but agree. For the past few months, she had been like a little puppy, doing anything and everything in her power to grab Lucas's attention, even when she knew he secretly wanted Peyton instead.

It wasn't fair, Brooke thought. Why did Peyton always have to get everything?

Nathan swam to the top of Brooke's mind, and she smiled bitterly. And whatever Peyton was done with, Haley was quick to grab. In fact, nearly everybody had had a chance at Nathan, except for Brooke. Which didn't even make sense because he was the captain of the basketball team and she was the head of the cheerleading squad. Those types were always together in the movies, weren't they?

Until some shy little vixen steps in, Brooke thought with a harsh laugh, I guess that would be Haley.

The only difference was Haley didn't step into anything because Brooke and Nathan had never had anything together in the first place.

A car passed her by and then another. When the third one slowed to a stop beside her, Brooke didn't even notice. "Brooke!" the driver yelled to catch her attention. "Brooke!"

Her head shot up, surprised and alarmed. Her stomach sank when she recognized the voice.

"Hey, Tutor-girl," Brooke said weakly. She quickly brushed away any remaining tears and curved her lips into a somewhat fake grin.

Haley seemed somewhat annoyed but plastered a smile on all the same. Maybe using cute pet-names didn't really work when you tore a person down the night before. Especially when you've been having disturbing thoughts about their boyfriend too. But Haley didn't know that.

"You need a ride?" Haley offered.

Brooke shrugged. "I'm okay walking."

An eyebrow shot up on Haley's face. "I guess so. This might seem nosy, but why are you walking anyway?"

"I don't have my car," Brooke said. She was very much aware of how difficult she was being but couldn't bring herself to stop.

Luckily, Haley was a patient person, particularly when it came to Brooke. She had had somewhat of a soft spot for the girl ever since she had apologized for being so bitchy and gotten her and Nathan together. Haley wasn't sure if she would have ever had the courage to make a move on her own. "I can see that," she said slowly, "but why don't you have your car…or any car for that matter?"

Brooke shrugged again. She was obviously avoiding the entire subject. "So what was that you said about a ride?" she said, smiling cutely.

Haley wasn't fooled. She liked to fancy herself as someone who could see beneath the exterior of a person and had a feeling that something was upsetting Brooke. Probably something about the baby, Haley reasoned. But she didn't want to push Brooke. "Okay," Haley relented, "get in the car."

Brooke gave an appreciative half-smile, but Haley could tell her heart really wasn't in it. "Home, please," Brooke requested.

"You got it," Haley said, pushing her car into gear and pulling away from the curb.

"Thanks," Brooke mumbled, "I don't care how much practice I've had walking; it would have taken forever and a day to get to my house."

"Why were you walking in the middle of the road anyway?" Haley asked tentatively. She still didn't want to push, but that didn't stop her from being curious.

"I was on the side of the road," Brooke corrected with a smirk.

Haley rolled her eyes. "You know what I mean."

Brooke sighed. "It's been a long day," she said, echoing Lucas's words from earlier that morning.

"It's barely noon," Haley pointed out gently, laughing.

Her eyes flew to the neon green numbers of the clock in Haley's car automatically. It was only 12:08. Brooke suppressed a groan. "I think," she thought out loud, only half joking, "I think I want to be a hermit when I grow up."

"Brooke Davis? A hermit?" Haley giggled. "Now, that's something hard to picture."

Vaguely disappointed, Brooke was inclined to agree. It was like she needed people around her. She thrived on it. She had nearly driven herself crazy cooped up alone inside her house for only half of that weekend. And then everything else had gone crazy with her.

They rode in an uncomfortable silence the rest of the way, both concerned with different things—Haley with trying not to pry, and Brooke feeling guilty about her recent thoughts and fight with Nathan. Maybe he was right. Maybe they were doing something wrong. Seeing Haley only increased her insecurities.

But it wasn't Brooke's place to tell. She hadn't even wanted to in the first place.

They were almost at Brooke's house when Haley's cell phone rang, cutting into the heavy silence. Brooke couldn't have been more relieved. Until Haley answered.

"Hey, Nathan, what's up?" she cooed into the phone. Brooke blanched, but Haley didn't notice.

Suddenly, Haley's voice was much more serious than before. "You're where? What happened?"

Brooke was outright fidgeting now. Maybe she ought to try that whole jumping out of the car thing after all. Jump out of the car, run like hell, and never look back, Brooke mused grimly. This was, of course, considering she survived the jump.

At any rate, she probably wouldn't have any need for an abortion anymore.

"What?" Haley gasped into the phone, breaking Brooke away from her trance. Brooke clenched her teeth. The worst was yet to come.

Nathan must have been saying something because Haley fell silent, nodding slightly. Abruptly, she turned her head to stare at Brooke, her expression incredulous.

So there it was. Brooke knew her name would come up eventually.

"Brooke was there too, huh?" Haley repeated slowly and sent a pointed look over at the other girl. "And she just walked off?"

There was another brief silence before Haley spoke again. "Yeah, I'll be on the lookout out for her, Nathan. I'll be there in a second. Bye, love you." She snapped the phone shut, her eyes still on Brooke.

Brooke fidgeted again. "So I guess Nathan had a lot to say," she said lamely.

"Oh yeah," Haley snapped back, "Interesting little story about a car accident, actually."

"Really?" Brooke squeaked. "I hadn't heard about it."

"Funny," Haley grimaced, "since, you know, you were in it."

Brooke sighed. "Listen, Haley, I'm really…"

"Don't even tell me you're sorry, Brooke," Haley said, livid. "My best friend was in a car accident, and you didn't even tell me? Did you think it was some fun, first-grade secret or something?"

"Haley," Brooke tried again.

"No, Brooke," Haley said, shaking her head. "What is it with you? You're either giving out too much information, or you just shut everybody out. Isn't it just okay to be average sometimes?" On the word average, Haley gave a grunt and pulled her car into a U-turn.

"Where are we going?" Brooke panicked.

Haley gave her a look. "Back to the hospital. Where did you think?"

"No!" Brooke exclaimed. "I just came from there." Her voice turned pleading. "Can't you just drop me off at home first? Please?"

Shaking her head again, Haley gritted her teeth. "Any other day, Brooke. But Lucas just had a concussion. Can't you understand that?"

"He's over it now, isn't he?" Brooke said desperately.

Haley, for all her patience and kindness, ignored her. "We should probably call Peyton too and let her know."

Brooke's expression turned from begging to sour. "Yeah, lets. We can have one big party in the emergency room."

Haley didn't answer, and Brooke turned and looked out the window bitterly. If that bastard could've called just five minutes later, she would have been safely home, away from everyone and all their bullshit. But, things are never supposed to go your way, Davis, Brooke berated herself, you should know that by now.

In the background, she could hear Haley dialing up Peyton.

"…don't get riled up or anything, but there's been another accident…" There were a few words that Brooke couldn't catch, and then a silence in which she presumed Peyton was speaking. "Yeah, it's Lucas," Haley said, "but it's not too bad or anything…Yes, I'm sure…Nathan called me…just come down, okay? We'll all be there. See ya."

After she hung up the phone, Haley paused to give Brooke yet another exasperated look. Brooke pretended not to notice. She still had a few minutes of a much-needed reprieve before they reached the hospital.

Unfortunately, when it came right down to it, those minutes seemed to speed into seconds. "Here we are," Haley said with mock-cheeriness. Brooke was surprised but did nothing more than raise a brow. She was going to have to watch out for this one; Haley seemed to be developing a mild sarcastic steak to her.

While Haley went through the motions of removing her seatbelt and scrambling out of the car, Brooke had no intentions of doing any such thing. This evidently caught the other girl off-guard. "Well," Haley said impatiently, "aren't you coming?"

"Wasn't really planning on it," Brooke shrugged.

Haley wasn't in any mood to be humoring her actions. "Of course you are," Haley said in a no-room-to-argue tone. "Come on; get out."

Brooke pretended to consider the notion for a beat before shaking her head and looking very much apologetic. "No, I really don't think I want to."

The huff Haley gave was one that could rival Brooke at her most spoilt moments. "Fine then," she snapped, giving in. "If you want to alienate everybody who cares about you, go ahead and stay. But, if not, I strongly suggest you follow me."

Haley obviously did not realize the potential of Brooke's audacity. "To each her own, right?" Brooke smirked, sugar-sweet.

Momentarily frozen, it took a few good seconds for Haley to recover from the shock that had swept over her from Brooke's words. It hadn't really been the answer she had expected, to say the least. All traces of anger had quickly escaped from her demeanor.

"I guess so," Haley stammered in a shell-shocked voice, obvious hurt flooding through her eyes. Brooke felt more than a twinge of guilt.

"Look, Hales," she began, but it was too late. Haley had already slammed the door and was hurrying up to the hospital in a near run. With a groan, Brooke allowed her head to fall back against the seat of the car. What a mess she had created. She really was putting up an undeniable effort to ward herself away from her friends, she realized, as Haley was probably running straight in to cry on Nathan and Lucas's shoulders.

And they would take Haley's side of course, because she was their very own shy little vixen, and they would love and protect her forever.

As for Brooke?

She didn't even know what she was to them. She didn't even think she wanted to. After what Nathan had said to her, it was a very real possibility that she may not even be comparable to something vile on the bottom of their precious basketball shoes.

The thought depressed Brooke thoroughly. So much so, that at first, she didn't notice the arrival of another until he called out to her.

"Brooke?"

Her head shot up. "Nathan," she murmured, her eyes meeting his across the lot. He began jogging towards her, probably to yell at her for being such a bitch to Haley, and Brooke only became aware of one thing. She couldn't stay. She couldn't handle this.

Brooke was about to reach for the door handle, when her eyes caught the gearshift of the car, and she noticed something much more useful. Haley had forgotten to take the keys out. Brooke shot another wild look at the steadily approaching figure of Nathan and made up her mind right then and there. She unbuckled her seatbelt and all but dived into the driver's seat. Nathan paused to watch her in disbelief and gave her the time she needed to start the car and shift it into gear.

Against her own good sense, Brooke gave Nathan one last, searching gaze before she pulled out of the parking lot. His expression spoke volumes, but Brooke knew she wasn't ready to listen to what he had to say.

So she did the thing she was best at. She ran. Again.

It was like a scene out of a movie with tires squealing and the engine roaring, but Brooke didn't take the time to notice. She just had to get out. Near the entrance, she nearly collided with another car that stung in her memory, but Brooke didn't even look to apologize. With a quick jerk of the wheel, she was onto the main road, which meant one thing. Freedom.

Meanwhile, Peyton had brought her car to a screeching halt after having just avoided an accident, ready to tell off the driver of the other car.

But she was gone.

Author's Note: Probably the longest lull between chapters yet. For both stories come to think of it. If you are just checking here for any news on Only in the News (nice play on words there right? Totally accidental, I promise) rest assured that an update should be coming soon. However, for those of you who are interested in this story, I'm promising big things for next chapter. I mean, come on, Brooke just stole a car. Which, in essence, has nothing to do with the things about next chapter I'm promising you, but still. So anyway, stay tuned. Chapter twelve should be a fun one. Well anyway, it's time to get to the real point of these author's notes and remind you to read/review! I mean, come on, everybody knows how much fun a review is.

until next time…

caramelo