Alex banged his fist on the door of the Loft until he heard Jo's voice.
"I'm coming. I'm coming."
It was late in Seattle and he had been traveling all day to try and get home. He was surprised she was home and felt bad for waking her up when the baby was probably making her extra tired. Still, he needed to see her. He needed to tell her that he loved her and that he was going to be there for her and their baby.
The lock on the door clicked and she pulled it open. "Thank god, Alex. Your home."
Jo threw herself at him as she wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder. He didn't hesitate to hold her as tight as he could. He closed his eyes and reveled in the feeling of having her in his arms. She was right. The moment he held her again, he was home.
"Wait," Jo said pulling back as she glared at him. "Did you really sleep with Izzie?"
"What, no, of course not," Alex said, shaking his head. "It was just something I said during our fake fight to make everyone believe that we were getting divorced. Did you believe it?"
"No, I just, it felt so real," Jo said looking down and crossing her arms.
"I'm sorry," Alex said as he leaned into her, desperate to be close to her. "I promise you it's only you, Jo. It's only ever been you."
Jo looked into his eyes as she took in his words and she nodded as she reached out to him again. She wrapped her arms around his neck, but he put his hands on her waist and pulled back to look at her. He looked her up and down as he took her in and Jo let him stare at her.
When she showed up in Kansas for their fight, he had just stared at her, not really seeing her but absolutely consumed by her. This time he took the time to notice the changes pregnancy had brought to her. Her skin glowed, and her hair looked longer and shinier, her cheeks were round her, and she looked so much more beautiful. He looked into her eyes as she just stared at him before he looked down. His eyes went wide as he took in the size of her breasts and how much they had swelled up. Then he looked down at her bump. Jo was cradling it with one hand and it stuck out against her skin tight shirt. Again, he stared down at her bump. It was so obvious now, and he was a little awestruck as he stared at Jo, pregnant with their child.
Alex fell to his knees as he moved his hands to cradle her belly. "You're pregnant. We're having a baby."
"I'm sorry," Jo said as he looked up to see tears welling up in her eye.
"For what?" Alex asked as he tried to think of a single thing that she had to apologize for.
"For not telling you earlier, for not realizing I was pregnant earlier, for getting pregnant when we agreed to wait until you could get the kids. I tried not to need you, but I do. I need you here with me. I don't want to divorce you, Alex. That's the last thing in the world I wanted to do. I need you to put our child and me first right now. I need to be the priority and I know that's going to mess our whole plan up. It's going to ruin everything, but I need you to do what's best for us, and I can't move right now. Carina wouldn't even let me fly out to see you again."
"Why Jo, what's wrong?" Alex said, standing up and reaching forward to place one hand on her cheek as he kept the other over her bump.
"Going to Kansas put a lot of stress on the baby and me. When I came back, I ended up in the hospital for a few days because I was throwing up so much I got dehydrated. Then I got a blood clot in my leg, but Maggie and Carian have been keeping an eye on it. I promise I'm doing fine. I'm taking my meds and wearing my compression stockings. Still, Carina has recommended that I avoid stress and not fly for the rest of my pregnancy. I want to see the kids I do, but I can't. I'm sorry."
"Hey, no, none of that," Alex said, leaning his forehead against hers as he wrapped his arms around her and held her close as she sobbed into his shoulder. "If anything, it's my fault for even suggesting that we divorce and bringing you so much heartache. I hate that I did this, Jo. I hate that I hurt you. That's the last thing in the world that I wanted to do. I was a terrible father to our baby and I will never forgive myself for missing the first few weeks of your pregnancy. I'm sorry Jo. You had to do this on your own and it wasn't right of me to ask you to leave like I did. I didn't want to do the hard thing and try to figure out how to go between Seattle and Kansas and how to be a good husband to you and a good father to the twins. I picked my kids because they deserve to have a dad, and I knew that you understand that. That you would be okay waiting for me, but you weren't, you needed me too, our baby needed me, and you both deserved to have me without sneaking around. "
"I was going to tell you in Kansas," Jo said as she pulled back, still crying as she rubbed your tears away with her fingers.
"What?" Alex asked, his eyebrows furrowed together as he looked at her in disbelief.
"When I came to Kansas, to talk to have our fake fight. I was gonna tell you. I was gonna get the kids early from school and put them in these big brother, big sister t-shirts," Jo said as she turned around and grabbed the bag and pulled out two white shirts with black lettering. "I wasn't gonna say anything. I was just gonna wait until you noticed the shirts."
"You were going to tell me in Kansas?" Alex asked in disbelief as he just stared at the shirts. "But why didn't you?"
"It was all too real, the fight hearing you lie and say that you slept with Izzie and that you chose her and the twins over me and our baby was too much," Jo said as she put a hand over her mouth as she started to cry again. "I'm sorry, I didn't tell you, but I just got so caught up in the motions of our fight. I, I just couldn't, and when I got back to Seattle, I was so sick, so I just sent the papers. I'm sorry that's not how I wanted you to find out."
"No, I'm sorry Jo," Alex said, reaching out to cup her cheek and brush away her tears. She leaned into his touch and she put her hand next to his on her bump. "This whole plan was stupid. We never should have done it in the first place. I never should have let you leave or tried to divorce you. You and our baby need me just as much as the twins do. I was so focused on getting them that I forgot that I needed to learn how to be a good father and a good husband to you. I'm sorry Jo, I'm sorry I didn't realize that I needed to prioritize you just as much as I do the twins and I'm sorry for that."
Jo put a hand on her belly and she just nodded. "I get why you choose the kids. The moment I saw our baby on the ultrasound, the moment I realized I was pregnant, it was like my whole world changed. My heart burst with a love for our child, and nothing else mattered except for them. I had to do what was best for our baby, but I never forgot about you. I never wanted to make you second place to them, but you let me leave, so I had to."
"I' m sorry, I never should have chosen the twins over you. I never should have done this without you. I want you back. I want my wife, Jo Karev because you've always stood by me. You make me want to be a better man. I broke your heart and I pushed you away. I'm so sorry Jo, and I know that you have no reason to take me back, but I'm here. I want to be here for you and for our baby and I know you want me to be a part of their life. If that means going back and forth between Seattle and Baldwin City, then I'll do it. I'll do anything that you ask of me, Jo, because I love you, and I'm still your husband and it's my duty to do right by you and to be there for you, for better or for worse. It's not going to be easy and I know that but you and our baby deserve better than what I've given you."
He can see her eyes glistening with tears as she slowly took in his words. She stared into his eyes, but she was still full of tears.
"I'm here to prove to you that I want to do right by you and our baby," Alex said as he reached in his bag and he pulled out the divorce papers. "I can't sign them Jo. I won't. I'm not going to end our marriage because I want to do right by you and that means staying by your side. I'm committing to being your husband, okay, I'm yours."
"You don't want to divorce me anymore, even if it means not getting custody of the twins?" Jo said as she pulled back, wiping away her tears as they finally seemed to stop.
"No, I don't want to divorce you. I never wanted to divorce you," Alex said, laying out his heart to her. He felt like he was proposing to her again and in a way, he was.
"I can't believe it took all of this for you to realize this. You're such an idiot," Jo said as she crossed her arms and rolled her eyes.
"But I'm your idiot," Alex said with a sly smile and although Jo tried, she couldn't resist the smile that appeared across her lips.
"You are," Jo said, as she softened and tilted her head as she smiled at him.
"Are you sure?" Alex said, looking over her, still questioning her commitment to him.
"Of course, Alex, I said till death do us part, and I meant it. I love you," Jo said, staring into his eyes with that soft love that she always had for him. It made his heart soar as he closed his eyes and breathed in her words. It was the first time she had said she loved him in person in nearly two months and he had missed it so much.
"Some days I still can't believe that you love me," Alex said, staring into her eyes and getting a little lost.
"Well, believe it because I do. I love you Alex Karev," Jo said, reaching out to put a hand on his cheek, rubbing her thumb along his stubble. "Even though you are stupid, so stupid, sometimes. I love you and I want only you."
Alex's small smile turned into a big wide grin as he reached forward and wrapped his arms around her. She giggled as he picked her up and twirled her around before he set her back down and pressed his lips to hers. It took her by surprise, but she quickly melted into him, and she wrapped her arms around his neck. This is how it was supposed to be, but she still pulled back.
"If you ever try to divorce me again, I will never forgive you," Jo yelled at him as she punched his shoulder, but he couldn't help but smile because he knew he never would. "And if you mess up or choose anyone over me again, Alexander! I will divorce you so fast your head will spin. You and I are in this together with all of our kids, our baby and the twins, Alexis and Eli. So we are gonna figure out things with Izzie and we'll figure it out, you and me."
"I'm never leaving your side again. I promise," Alex said as he smiled this big, wide happy smile.
"Good because when you do, you make stupid decisions, and I can't have that," Jo said with a true and genuine smile and he laughed because it was then that he knew that he was back in her good graces.
"Okay," Alex agreed as he pulled her into him. He leaned his forehead against hers and Jo smiled as she tilted her head up to kiss him.
He poured his love into his lips and she melted into him. He wrapped his arms around her and held his cheek like she always did when they kissed. This was where he was supposed to be in Jo's arms. The rest of it didn't matter, so long as he was in her arms. He was home and he would never make the mistake of leaving her again. He knew that it wasn't all that simple, but he had her love again and she had his. For now, that was enough.
When Jo pulled back from their kiss to take in a breath, Alex looked down as he let both his hands cradle her bump. "We're gonna have a baby!"
"We are," Jo said, as she smiled, just as excited as he was.
They both just smiled down at the life they had created. Their little tiny baby fits in both of his hands right now, but he couldn't wait to watch her and their baby grow more round and big. He felt so honored that she was going to let him be there. Sometimes he wondered what he did to deserve someone so good as Jo.
"You're what, 12 weeks along now? I can't believe I missed so much of it," Alex said, feeling the size of her bump with a shake of his head as he looked up at her.
"Have you seen the size of my bump, Alex? You know there's no way I'm 12 weeks," Jo said as she rubbed her hand up and down her belly.
"Well, then how far along are you?" Alex asked, studying her bump for a second, trying to do the math.
"I'm 15 weeks along," Jo said, as Alex looked up at her, his eyes wide as she just smiled at him.
"Wait, that means…."
"I was 9 weeks pregnant the last time I was in Kansas with you," Jo said with a sly smile remembering their conversation that night about making a baby. When unbeknownst to both of them, they already had one.
"How did you not know? How did I not know?" Alex asked, looking down and her bump again and shaking his head. "I mean, you barely had any symptoms, you were a little tired, but you weren't throwing up all the time, and you certainly weren't showing."
"I know, I didn't even realize I was pregnant. Meredith practically had to drag me into Carina's office and force me to have an ultrasound because I was so in denial about it," Jo said with a small smile as she shook her head.
"How could you not notice your boobs getting bigger and how could you have missed it?" Alex smiled as he stared down at her breasts, and Jo smacked his chest, but she laughed, so he kept staring.
"I just thought I was gaining a little weight," Jo said with a shrug of her shoulders as he shook his head and leaned in to kiss her again.
"Yeah, that I did notice," Alex said with a smile as he teased her and of course, Jo smacked him again.
"You're such a jerk. It's your fault that this baby is already so big, I'm going to get fat," Jo said as they stared down at her bump together.
"You're going to be so beautiful, and I can't wait to watch every minute of it," Alex said, looking up at her and Jo's eyes softened as she smiled at him.
He pulled her closer and kissed her again. She moaned into his lips as she deepened the kiss. She pulled him in a familiar backwards walk to the bed and Alex smiled against her lips before he leaned down to pick her up. Jo wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled back to giggle as he held her up with two hands on her ass.
This gave him the chance to trail his lips down her neck and make her really moan. He carried her over to the bed and moved to set her down on the mattress. Jo sat up and stripped off her sweatshirt. With no bra underneath, Alex got to see her body for the first time in six weeks. He also got to see the changes that pregnancy had brought to her body.
Her skin still had the same familiar warm color, but it glowed in the lowlights of the loft. Her breasts were larger and as evidence of her pregnancy, but his eyes still trailed down to where her bump had captured all of his attention. He leaned down to kneel in front of her and pressed a kiss to her bump. Jo smiled down at him as she tangled a hand in his hair.
He left a trail of kisses down her bump until he reached her hips and Jo decided he was going to slow and pulled at his shirt. He smiled as he pulled back and let her drag it over his head. It didn't take long for them to strip each other of their clothes and they didn't even bother to crawl under the covers. He was too desperate for her and she captured him again like she always did. They fell together in the sheets as husband and wife once again.