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Chapter 2

He grew lightheaded, grasping onto the chair in front of him to keep from falling over.

"No," came out of his lips like a desperate whisper. Their child was gone. He could no longer hold back the tears and one slid down his cheek, before more joined it.

"I am terribly sorry," Robert stated again, pursing his lips thoughtfully. "Why don't we sit?"

"Anna?" He asked. Robert hadn't told him anything about how Anna was doing and why she wasn't here. At his question, Robert gave him a small nod.

"It was a long ordeal and the doctor says she needs to stay in bed," Robert explained. "As you can imagine, she's quite stricken by the loss." And he wasn't there. She was handling this all on her own.

Slowly, John sat himself at the table and Robert followed suit. They stayed in silence for a long while, as John muddled through all he now knew. His one comfort with leaving this earth was that Anna would not be alone, that she would have their child as a memory. But now, that child was gone.

"Was it a boy or a girl?" John was finally able to ask.

"A boy," Robert answered.

"A boy," John repeated. "Did…did Anna give him a name?"

"I don't know," Robert honestly told him. He reached into his pocket and slid a folded piece of paper over the table. "This is from Anna. She wrote it while in labor, when she knew she wouldn't be able to come. It was then that she chose me to be the one to visit you. I was told of the baby's passing right before leaving to come and see you."

John touched the folded paper, closing his eyes. These were his last words from Anna. He would never see her face again.

Gently, he took the paper in his hands, as though it was him holding her. He unfolded it and immediately recognized her handwriting. But it was shaky and the paper was crumpled, which led him to believe that as she was writing it she had been in pain.

My Dear John,

I will never forget you. I will never regret loving you, never. I love you.

Always, Anna

He read over her words several times, before folding it back up and placing it into his pocket over his heart. His hand lingered over it and he wished he was with her right now and not in this cold and dark prison, nearing his execution.

"Thank you," he told Robert.

"We will take care of Anna," Robert promised, again. "But I have not given up hope on you yet, Bates. There is still time to get this turned around."

John didn't reply. While he was grateful for Robert's hope, John could no longer have hope for a better future. He knew what it soon would bring. Death did not scare him, but leaving Anna behind and alone in the world did. And now, she would not only be losing him.

"Please," Robert began, as though he could read John's thoughts. "Don't give up hope."

"I need to write Anna a letter. Will you please get it to her?"

"Of course."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Robert entered Downton Abbey and could feel the somberness the moment he stepped foot inside. Carson took off his jacket and gave him a tight smile.

"Any updates?" Robert asked him.

"No, my lord. Dr. Clarkson is still here. Last I heard, Anna was still sleeping. Lady Mary and Mrs. Hughes are upstairs with her."

"Right," Robert sighed.

"How did the meeting with Mr. Bates go?" Carson questioned.

"As well as it could, I suppose. Tell Ms. Patmore that we'll eat a light dinner."

"Yes, my lord." Carson gave a slight nod and then disappeared toward the stairs that headed down. Robert's eyes moved up to where the last two days had been filled with worry and stress.

Soon after they arrived back to the Abbey the day before, they realized that Anna was in labor and had been throughout the entire trial. Mary insisted they put her in one of the rooms upstairs and after all the stress of the trial, Robert had to agree with her. They rang for Dr. Clarkson and then waited. And waited.

Robert remained away from it all, but he got updates from Dr. Clarkson and Mary. He had noted the grim nature of Dr. Clarkson's demeanor, but had assumed it had to do with Bates' verdict. Looking back, he now knew that Dr. Clarkson predicted the grim outcome of the birth.

Taking in a deep breath, Robert made his way up the stairs. He had the letter from John in his breast pocket and had promised to take it to Anna himself. He would keep that promise to his comrade.

After a gentle knock, Mary opened the door. She looked terribly exhausted. Her normally well done up hair and dress were all astray. Her eyes were dark and full of both exhaustion and grief for her lady's maid.

"Oh, Papa," she greeted, stepping out of the room and closing the door behind her. "How is Bates?"

Robert just shook his head.

"How is Anna?"

"Awake, quiet," Mary knitted her brows. "Dr. Clarkson gave her something to help her sleep, but it didn't last too long."

"Might I take her this letter from Bates?"

"Of course," Mary reopened the door and moved aside for Robert to enter the room. Everything had been cleaned and so if he hadn't known any better, he wouldn't know a difficult labor had happened in this very room.

Mrs. Hughes was sitting in the corner of the room, her own eyes rimmed red. Upon seeing Robert, she stood and attempted a smile and a nod.

"Sit," he encouraged, knowing just how tired she likely was, as well. Both of the women needed to go to bed themselves, but he gathered neither wanted to leave Anna just yet.

He walked over to where Anna was laying on the bed. She had her eyes on the ceiling and her cheeks were pale.

"Bates wrote you a letter," he quietly said. Anna's eyes moved to him. He half expected her to sit up and jerk it out of his hands in anticipation of what her husband had written to her. But instead, he had to hand the letter to her. Anna clasped her hands around it, before placing it on the table beside the bed.

"Thank you," her voice was gruff, wrought with fatigue and sorrow. Then she turned away from him, closing her eyes and not saying another word. Robert glanced at Mary, who shook her head.

"I'll let you rest," Robert whispered. He sighed, before walking out of the room.

When he made it to his own room, he found Cora sitting at her vanity. She immediately stood when she saw him and made her way over toward him.

"How did it go?"

"Not well," he answered honestly.

"So you told him?" Cora asked.

"I had to Cora," Robert answered. "It is his family. He has the right to know what truly happened. I know you thought it might be best to lie to him, but I couldn't do it."

"I understand," Cora reached out to touch his shoulder.

"And there is still a chance he won't be hung," Robert added.

Cora met his eyes and he could see that her hope for that was not there, but she didn't say it out loud. She only gave his shoulder a supportive squeeze and him a somber smile.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

"You should go to bed, Lady Mary. You haven't slept in nearly two days," Mrs. Hughes whispered to the tired woman before her. Mary had been sitting in the chair beside Anna's bed and had nearly fallen off the chair when her body tried to give into sleep.

"I'm alright," Mary strongly stated, though the wavering on her feet made Mrs. Hughes' brow raise.

"To bed with you, m'lady," Mrs. Hughes more sternly said. "You can't help Anna if you fall over. I will stay nearby."

Finally, Anna had fallen into a deeper sleep. Dr. Clarkson had come back with a stronger sedative and he said not to expect Anna to wake for hours or even days. The emotional and physical exhaustion was great and even with that sleep, Anna would need much longer to heal. The family was being generous with Anna's care and Anna was not to be removed from this room until Dr. Clarkson said she was ready.

"You also need sleep," Mary pointed out. It was true. Mrs. Hughes felt dead on her feet, but she couldn't bring herself to leaving Anna's side, not after all she had been through.

"And I will," Mrs. Hughes promised. "Go on now. I promise I will send for you if anything changes."

Mary gave a huff of defeat, before glancing over at Anna once more. Then she finally left the room, leaving Mrs. Hughes alone with Anna. She walked over toward the girl and carefully brought the covers up higher over her, hoping to keep her warm.

Once she did that, she found she didn't know what to do. So she took a seat by the fireplace and grabbed her book that sat beside her. She really should be downstairs, making sure everything was in order. No doubt, Mrs. O'Brien was enjoying being in command while she was here. But she would have to let it slide for now. Anna's wellbeing meant more.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Mary was awoken by her mother gently shaking her shoulder. She groaned, feeling completely out of sorts. What day was it? What time was it?

"Mary," her mother's voice was impatient. "You need to wake up. There is news about Mr. Bates."

At that, Mary awoke fully. She sat herself up at met her mother's eyes.

"Has he been hung?"

"No, he's been given a reprieve. He won't be hung. Life imprisonment, but he won't hang."

Mary narrowed her eyes and covered her hand with her heart.

"Does Anna know?"

"She's still sleeping."

Sliding herself out of bed, Mary quickly grabbed her dress that she had thrown over her chair.

"Shouldn't we wake her?"

"I'm not sure that's a good idea," Cora said with a shake of her head. "Dr. Clarkson believes it's best to keep her asleep."

Mary twisted her lips, thinking on it. The Anna she had seen over the past couple of days seemed to be on the verge of giving up. Knowing that Bates would live, might give her the push to step out of the shadows and want to live again. But she also gathered that she could still find out when she woke up. The news was not going to change.

Feeling a bit lost, Mary sighed and sat herself back down on her bed.

"This is good news," Cora said, sitting beside her. "He will live."

"Yes, it is."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Mrs. Hughes had to be woken up by Mr. Carson. She had fallen asleep on the chair and had dropped her book on the floor. He told her of the good news and now she was anxiously awaiting for Anna to awake.

Carson had sent her upstairs to rest and she listened, but she had only been able to sleep an hour before she was back to Anna. She wanted to be there when Anna found out that her husband would live.

Finally, Anna was waking up. It was clear that she was groggy and not quite sure where she was. Mrs. Hughes watched as Anna touched her belly and the complete recognition that her baby was no longer there. Anna's face fell and she hid her head back into the pillows.

"Anna," Mrs. Hughes whispered. Anna didn't listen to her, so Mrs. Hughes went to sit on the bed beside her. She placed her hand on Anna's upper arm. "Anna, Mr. Bates has been given a reprieve. He won't hang."

That got Anna's attention. She slowly and carefully turned to face Mrs. Hughes.

"He…he won't?" There was a crack in her voice. Her lips were chapped.

"Life in prison," Mrs. Hughes added. Anna searched Mrs. Hughes' face. "Life over death."

Anna seemed to soak this all in. She then pushed off her covers and attempted to sit up, but she was still very weak.

"I…I must go to him now," she said. Mrs. Hughes placed her hands on Anna's shoulders to still her.

"Not now. You have to heal. But soon," she promised. "Here," Mrs. Hughes took the small tray of food that she had Ms. Patmore prepare for Anna. "Why don't you eat something?"

Anna glanced down at the food and made a face.

"I…I'm not hungry," she whispered.

"Eating could help you get your strength up," Mrs. Hughes tried, pushing the tray more into Anna's lap. Anna just pushed it away.

"Maybe later."

"Oh, alright," Mrs. Hughes moved the tray back to the side.

"Does…does Mr. Bates know?" Anna then asked, her brows furrowing and lower lip quivering slightly.

"Yes, dear, Lord Grantham told him."

Anna slowly nodded, turning her head away.

"He is going back to see him shortly. Would you like to write Mr. Bates a letter to send with him?"

Anna just shook her head.

"Why don't you rest some more? Perhaps Dr. Clarkson will say you can go tomorrow."

No more words were spoken. Anna slid back under the covers and turned away from Mrs. Hughes, leaving her lost and not sure what she should say or do next.

To be continued...

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