Warnings: Swearing, violence, abuse and Yugi acting a lot like Kaiba. Oh and a lot of angst! It's sort of dark humour at the moment.

Disclaimer: Bird rock bird bird feather rock bird person squiggle. (Translation: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! Or KT Tunstall whose songs I will use to name chapters.)

Notes: I forgot to say last time that this is an AU (alternative universe). The whole story is going to be in Ryou's point of view. To anyone reading any of my stories, especially Five Years Later, I am sorry for the long wait for updates. My life turned in to a soap opera and killed my inspiration. Five Years Later should be updated by the end of this month but don't hold me to that. The other stories will be updated shortly after. Thanks to all the reviewers! You ROCK!

Fear of the Unknown, Change and Death

Chapter 2

It's been a week since I got my tongue pierced. The swelling's pretty much gone now and I have been able to eat solid food for a couple of days now. It was… interesting, to say the least, to try and keep it from my dad. He still doesn't know about it so I think it was a success. Although I think he thinks that I may have an eating disorder. I don't. I love food. I just have a high metabolism.

Back to my point. It's been a week since I got it done and I have decided to tell Yugi and the gang.

We are all meeting at the park later today and I'll tell them all then. I'm worried about what they will say. They don't accept me as it is and I don't want to be alone. I wonder what they will think. I mean they can't think it too bad, it's not like I got my face covered in piercing is it?

Well I have to stop thinking now. I'm at the entrance to the park and I can see them all sitting happily in the middle of the field. Every possible situation has run through my head on the way here and now it is time. I have to tell them and bare the consequences. Fuck I'm scared.

As I walk over to them they notice me and Tea waves. Damn that bitch. I hate her. The bitch spread a rumour around school that I'm gay. I am but they didn't need to know that. They don't know it either. Sure they suspect, but they don't know for certain. I almost got thrown out of the gang because of that, but they were all supportive of me when I told them it wasn't true and someone was just being mean. Even Tea was 'supportive' to me. Bitch. She was just jealous of me because I was becoming close to Yugi. She only hangs out with him because she wants to get in to his pants. Heh. She has no chance. He's gay as well. He's just in denial about it at the moment.

"Hey guys." I say when I reach them. Various greetings follow. Then some casual chatter; 'how are you?' 'Been up to much lately?' etc.

"Um… I have something to show you all" I say, mustering up all the confidence that I own. Silence has fallen over the group in front of me. There's no turning back now. I stick out my tongue.

This must be the longest moment of my whole life. No one has said anything.

I must have closed my eyes when I showed them, I realise when I hear Tea's response of "Oh my god!" breathed out in a shocked gasp. This was followed by a "what the hell?" by Jou, a "Daaaaaaamn." By Honda and another "Oh my god!" which I can tell is muffled by Malik placing a hand over his mouth.

Yugi hasn't said anything. Slowly I open my eyes and put my tongue away. Yugi is just looking at me. There is no emotion in his face. It's just a cold, blank stare.

"Take it out, Ryou. It's disgusting." His tone is so cold I swear I just got frost bite from it, he continues in a business like tone "If you take it out now I will over look this incident and after one weeks exile I will allow you back in to the gang."

WHAT? These people are supposed to be my friends!

Yugi continues " and if you don't take it out now we will be forced to tell your father about this."

He stands up, brushes grass off of his jeans and pulls the hem of his t-shirt down to straighten it out. Then he looks at me. Staring straight into my eyes. I know that what he said wasn't a threat. It was a promise.

"What will it be?" he demands his voice is still cold and there is no emotion in it.

That's when I realised that my answer here and now would be what decides my life. I must have fallen to my knees at some point, as I now have to look up at Yugi, which is saying something. The rest of the gang have also stood up and are now standing behind Yugi like an army behind their fearless leader. Am I really that much of a threat? Man, Yugi is such a shrimp. I swear that he only comes up to Jou's hip. Hmmmmm… that's going to be useful for Jou when he wants head. God it's weird where your mind goes to when your life is falling apart around you. You think of the most useless and mundane things. It's a pain in the ass (not a good one at that). Focus Ryou, focus.

"No" I all but whisper.

"What?" he asks. He must not have heard me.

"NO!" This time I yell.

"Fine Ryou, have it your way. You are hereby removed from the gang. Don't ever speak to me again. Now, we must pay your father a visit." With that they all turned away and walked off.

Why? Why were they doing this to me? If this were a film it would start raining. The rain mixing with my tears that ran down my face in torrents. But this is life. There was no rain. The sun was shining. Bright and warm. Fucking thing! I'm not happy! Why do you mock me so!

I'm not even fucking crying! I was numb but now I'm angry. What the fuck is wrong with me getting my tongue pierced? It's a stupid piece of metal. It doesn't change the person I am! God! You can't even fucking see it!

I throw my fist at the ground while screaming out loud.

My fist connects with the ground and a bolt of pain shoots up my arm.

Wait.

They're going to tell my father?

They are going to tell my fucking father!

Goddamn them!

I push myself up off the ground. I don't even know how long I have been sat there. But I know one thing. I have to beat them to my father. I have to tell him myself!

I take off at a sprint. A mantra of 'I have to beat them' going around in my head.

I don't even know if I'm going the right way to my home, I just hope my body knows the way because I am too angry and scared to concentrate right now.

I'm running in a blind panic. All I can hear is the blood rushing through my veins and the pounding of my feet against the pavement below me. I don't see people or cars. I don't see anything. I can taste bile in my mouth not only from the situation but also from running, I don't do sports and I can't run for long before it makes me sick.

I fall to my knees in the middle of a road and retch. It isn't long before I have thrown up everything that was in my stomach. I stumble to my feet and continue on like nothing has happened.

Before I know it I'm standing outside a very familiar looking door. The door to my house. I pull out my keys and enter like a thief. I'm no thief. I'm not brave enough.

I hear noise from the kitchen. My breathing is so quite that it almost sounds like I'm not breathing at all and after the run I just had it's amazing. What a wonderful thing adrenalin is, that's the only thing steadying my breathing at the moment.

I move quietly towards the sound. As I enter the kitchen my father glares at me from where he is sitting at the table. There is a half empty bottle of vodka in his hand.

Fuck.

He is going to kill me.

He knows. I can tell. He knows.

Oh God. I am dead.

What many people don't know about my father is that he has a drink problem. He has for as long as I can remember. I think it may have started shortly after my mother died. It was ok then. He had to take anti-depressants and when they were mixed with the alcohol he just used to pass out. But then he was taken off of them. Now when he drinks he becomes violent. Oh, no. He's never hit me. He's come close a couple of times but he's never hit me. But I've seen him beat a guy to a bloody pulp because of the alcohol. And I know that he has done much worse to people, but he has always restrained himself with me.

I think that the restraint just ran out.

He is right in front of me and my back is pressed against a wall.

When the hell did that happen?

I can't escape. I'm trapped.

I look in to his eyes and see them filled with rage. I'm sure mine are filled with fear because he smirks sadistically.

"Show me." He growls at me.

I'm not stupid. I have to show him but if I stick my tongue out he is going to rip the stud from my tongue. I'd have to go to hospital and get it sewn back together. So I open my mouth so he can't grab it easily. He tries for it though and I shut my mouth quickly and end up biting his hand.

Now I'm really in for it.

"Take. It. Out." The order is ground out from clenched teeth. One of his hands is at my throat stopping any escape that I may have planned. As if I was brave enough to try running.

His grip tightens.

He wants an answer.

"N-no." I whisper. I can barely breathe because his grip has tightened even more.

Something snaps in his eyes and his fingers dig in to my neck. Strangling me. He pulls me forward and then slams me back against the wall with all his strength. My head hits the wall hard and I see stars. He does it a couple more times, and then throws me to the ground.

I use all my energy to open my eyes. The world is blurry and is swimming before my eyes, twisting and rolling, sickeningly.

He is standing before me now. I can't see him but I just know he is. He kicks me hard in the stomach taking away the last small amount of air that I had managed to drag in to my lungs. I couldn't breathe. Blackness was already consuming the blurry world of my vision.

"You had better not be here by the time I come back." Is the last thing I hear before my world goes dark.

Notes:

Hehehehehehehehe! The evil cliffy of DOOM! Muhahahahahahahahhaha!

Review and I might have mercy on you!