Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans.
A Strange Business
Chapter Four: Scum and Villainy
Hot Spot had to admit that he had never seen a green sunset before. Of course, the sun itself wasn't green, but the sky changed to a strange shade of green as it set on the horizon. Well, as one sun set on one horizon and one on the other. It was a very strange experience to be sure, to look both ways and see a sunset on either side. Hot Spot was used to setting his day by the sun, not really seeing the point in having a watch on his person. Such an object would only be incinerated or melt as soon as he powered up.
It had taken him years as Isiah Crockett to research the properties required for creating clothing that could withstand his powers. He had lived in a comfortable middle class household his entire life, his father being a much respected Judge. Everything that Isiah knew about right and wrong came from his father. He went to school and studied hard, where he found he had a talent for Physics and Chemistry.
Isiah's powers emerged at the tender age of sixteen during his first day at Ivy University, and he was abducted by a government agency that the identity of which, to this day, remain unknown to Hot Spot. All he remembered was a rather stout black woman staring at him as he lay on an examination table. It was there that he learned he was the result of a government experiment to create an alien/human hybrid, using his mother as an unwitting host. All of their other experiments were a failure excepting two. However, Hot Spot never found out who the other experiment was, for he escaped shortly after and returned home. The government agency had tried time and time again to capture him, each time failing.
For so long as a teenager, he was always afraid to power up into his red and yellow glowing form, fearing that he would hurt those around him. As he learnt to control his fantastic abilities, he had also come to the conclusion that while he physically and mentally suffered no ill effect from his powers, his clothes did, no matter how hot or cool he thought he was burning.
Initially, he believed that he could control his powers to the extent that his clothes wouldn't burn away, but every test resulted in his thin clothing first smoking, and then finally falling away as ash. It was lucky for him he was in his red powered form, or the other people around him would have seen a very embarrassed and naked Isiah Crockett standing before them. As it was, he looked like the Human Torch from the 'Fantastic Four' comic books he had seen.
Hot Spot was incredibly proud of his career as a superhero. He was entirely self sufficient when it came to his superhero supplies. Reading up on the subject of heat resistant substances and using his extensive knowledge and understanding of chemistry and physics, he created a suit that was similar to those used by workers that operated in dangerously hot locations, like hot springs and volcanoes.
By reversing the process, Hot Spot created a suit that was heat resistant on the inside, but projected his heat on the outside, helping him to ward off any approaching attackers. True, it wasn't particularly comfortable at first (and he attributed his bad attitude directly to that discomfort), but he had gradually altered it until it felt as comfortably as an old shoe. Of course, in such strange and laborious conditions as the planet they were on at the moment, Hot Spot's mind tended to drift on to everything that was irritating him in the slightest. Case in point; the way his boot was squeaking as he stepped on it.
Looking over at his two companions, he realised that the small noise was obviously more annoying to him than to them. Robin was simply staring blankly ahead, his face carved into a stony demeanour that concentrated on their target and nothing else. Hot Spot guessed that it was probably that tenacity that got him the job as the Teen Titans leader in the first place.
A glance over at Argent told Hot Spot that she wasn't really bothered by the strange planet either. To be honest, Hot Spot doubted that the pale skinned Brit could see anything past the Boy Wonder's behind, at which she was furtively glancing at every time his cape blew up. An image of Marilyn Monroe standing above a windy grate leapt into his mind, and Hot Spot couldn't help but smile. The Moroccan hero wondered what Robin's reaction would be if he knew about Argent's attentions.
He'd probably blush the same red as his tunic.
Once more looking at the two, Hot Spot began to wonder what women would see in Robin. He could understand that he was good looking and athletic. Hot Spot allowed a small smile. Hell… that was probably enough for most women. But you get past those surface things, and you've got a neurotic and controlling sonovabitch, not to mention a guy that doesn't smile.
Ever.
The only time Robin smiled was when he was about to kick your ass. Or had just kicked your ass. And he doubted women would find him attractive after doing that to them.
The Moroccan hero shrugged, pushing the thought from his mind. He turned to the pair and considered who he should talk to.
1: Robin.
Pros:
He'll listen and respond to what you say, quickly and to the point.
Cons:
He'll listen and respond to what you say, quickly and to the point.
2: Argent.
Pros:
She's closer to normal than Robin, and could probably engage you in human conversation.
Cons:
She's enamoured to Robin's behind, and therefore not going to listen to a word you say.
Hot Spot sighed.
"Hey, Robin?"
Continuing to walk forward, Robin only slightly tilted his head to see him out of the corner of his eye. At least, Hot Spot assumed it was the corner of his eye. It was hard to tell with those white lenses.
"Yeah?"
"Do you do this a lot? I mean, alien planets and space?"
The Boy Wonder was silent for a moment. "Not really," he said, his voice sounding vaguely troubled.
"So… you don't know any alien languages or secret handshakes or anything like that?"
A small noise came from Robin, and Hot Spot could have sworn that it was a chuckle. Shaking his head, Hot Spot quickly dismissed the thought.
C'mon. Robin laughing? Maybe's there's something in the atmosphere to make you think so crazy.
Said Titan leader's voice interrupted his thoughts. "Uh… no, sorry."
Hot Spot nodded. "Right."
Looking out at the horizon, Hot Spot squinted as though that would help him see their destination in more detail.
"So how long do you think until we get there?"
Robin's cheeks puffed out as he blew out a long, heavy breath, mentally calculating the distance. "I guess… if the terrain stays like this, and we keep a steady pace… a few hours."
His eyes half closing in exaggerated tiredness, Hot Spot's shoulder's sagged. "Right…" he sighed, and Robin once again let out a noise that sounded something like a chuckle. Hot Spot looked over at Robin and shook his head.
Definitely something in the atmosphere.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Robin tried to lie back on the rocky ground, and was only rewarded with pain as his back was once again skewered by a stray outcropping. With a frustrated growl he quickly sat back up, giving the ground his best approximation of the 'Bat-Glare'. He angrily brushed away all the debris from the ground where he was going to lie, then slowly attempted to lean back once again.
His teeth ground together as his plan for comfort was spoiled once again. If he didn't know better, he could have sworn that the ground was sending uncomfortable rocks his way. Casting a glance around their makeshift 'camp', he saw that Hot Spot and Argent were having no such trouble getting comfortable.
Maybe it's just me.
As he looked around the barren landscape and up into the sky, he wondered where Starfire was, and more importantly, if she was all right. Something told him that she was okay. Something always told him if she was all right. He liked to think that there was some kind of connection between them, even if there was no reason to think so. Every time they had lost contact with one another and she had been hurt, Robin had known. He hadn't known detail for detail what had happened to her, but in the intervening time, he just… knew in his gut that she was okay.
He hoped that she knew he was okay. Looking up at the sky, a part of him wished that he could see the stars, rather than those strange alien clouds. The stars always reminded him of Starfire, and in her absence, they always served to comfort him. He fondly remembered a time when he was training with the True Master, and, after a hard days training, he was sent to sleep outside. As he lay on his back and looked up at the stars, he could have sworn he saw Starfire on the roof of Titans Tower, staring up at the stars just as he was.
After another look around the 'camp', he turned towards the city that taunted him in the distance, only just visible over the horizon. From his extensive training with Batman, he thought that he had become pretty good at judging distances and estimating times. But the nature of this planet seemed to change perceptions, at least for humans. Needless to say, the city was further away than he had initially thought.
Fortunately, there were enough emergency rations in their three pods to last them for days. Initially, Robin had been worried about freezing to death during the night, but then realised that Hot Spot could keep them warm simply by sitting there in his powered form. And if, in some weird alien planet twist, the nights became too hot, he had more than enough freeze disks to cool everyone down.
He felt someone sit down next to him, and expected Hot Spot. The Moroccan hero seemed the most disturbed by being on an alien planet. If Robin was honest with himself, it scared him too. The only time he had been on alien planets, it was either with the other Titans, giving him a familiar safety net to fall back on, or Starfire would help them understand the strange cultures around them. The thought of the radiant Tamaranian brought a sigh from the Boy Wonder's lips.
"You okay?"
Robin cocked an eyebrow. That was most definitely not Hot Spot's voice. A small smile crossed Robin's face.
Unless he's had a sex change while I wasn't looking.
The Boy Wonder looked over to see Argent sat next to him, her legs and arms crossed. Noting her arms, he realised that she was trying to keep warm. Another glance over his shoulder, and Robin saw that Hot Spot had nodded off, and with his consciousness, his powered form had disappeared as well.
"Cold?" Robin asked, and Argent nodded, a small smile on her lips.
"It's okay. Compared to winter in England, this is nothing."
"Yeah, I know," Robin said, chuckling. Argent shot him a confused look, which just made Robin smile more.
"You've been to England?"
"Yeah, my b-" Robin stopped himself before he said 'butler'. The last thing he needed to try and explain away was Alfred Pennyworth, the butler at Wayne Manor. "-Uh… that is, my buddy is English."
"What's his name?"
Robin considered this for a moment, and then smiled. "Al."
"Al? Doesn't sound too English to me."
"It's short for Alfred."
"Ah…" she said, smiling as she looked back at the city. "Well, that's different."
A gust of wind passed over them, and Argent rubbed her arms all the more. Seeing this, Robin briefly considered taking off his cape and draping it over her shoulders. The thermal stitching of the black and yellow cape would certainly keep put any cold she was feeling. He dismissed the thought; she didn't seem the type to take help like that. Something occurred to him, and he pulled out a flare from his utility belt. Slamming the cap on the floor, the flare burst to life, bathing the pair in red, warming light.
He handed the flare over. "Here. It should keep you warm until the sun comes up or-" Robin looked over his shoulder at the slumbering Hot Spot, "-he wakes up."
Argent paused for a moment, giving the flare an odd look before taking it, a grateful smile on her face. "Thanks."
The two shared a brief silence, simply staring out at the city before them, watching the ships coming and going, looking only like tiny specs of light as the whizzed back and forth to the city. Robin looked over at Argent.
"So… how did you get your powers?" he asked, trying to keep his voice neutral. He had been attempting to find out from all of the new recruits a little bit about their past, but sometimes he came across as prying a little bit too much. He occasionally forgot that for some people, their powers were a horrible thing, or how they got them, at least.
Some were more forthcoming. Kid Flash, for instance, had gathered the Titans around him on the couch and enthralled them with the story of his origin and his adventures as a travelling superhero. Others, like Thunder and Lightning, were not so forthcoming about their origins. He knew that Red Star had told no-one else of his past, hoping to leave past events as just that; the past.
Argent sighed, and Robin winced, thinking he had once again stepped over the line. He silently berated the Batman side of him.
I blame you, Bruce.
"I was wondering how long it would take you lot to ask," she said, her face now a pale pinkish hue from the light of the flare. Her deep crimson eyes were instinctively drawn to the light, and she seemed almost hypnotised by the dancing sparks. After another sigh, she continued.
"I was actually pretty normal until my sixteenth birthday. I mean, I wasn't boring, but I had friends, I went to school, you know," she looked over at him, an ironic look in her eyes, "the normal, usual stuff."
Robin offered a sympathetic smile, but in all honesty, he had no idea what she meant. He had never led a normal life, at least as others would judge normal. First, he was a travelling acrobat, a member of the 'Flying Graysons' act, and then he was constantly and brutally trained by Batman, before moving on to the Titans. His life had been anything but 'the normal, usual stuff.' Argent continued, and Robin dismissed his self pitying thoughts.
"Then, I turned sixteen, and I could do this," she said, lifting her hand, now glowing with red energy. Several red lines appeared in the air, eventually spelling out the word 'this'. Robin smiled at the joke before nodding for Argent to continue.
"Then these government people… you know, sunglasses, black suits, the whole bloody nine yards… they came to the school and took me away. Shoved me in a van and took me to some facility somewhere, where I was poked and prodded in every way you care to imagine."
She shivered slightly, and Robin doubted that it was from the cold.
"And some I don't care to remember…" She scrunched up her eyes and covered them with her hand. "Oh… bloody hell…" she muttered quietly, fighting back the tears.
Panicking, Robin went with his first instinct; to babble incoherently. "Oh, I… uh… I'm sorry, I didn't mean to… uh…"
Argent smiled and let out a small laugh. "No, no… it's not your fault… it helps for me to talk about it, I suppose…"
She sniffed once loudly and wiped away some of the water that had gathered at the bottom of her eyes.
"Anyway… I found out I was 'the result of an experiment'," she said, taking on a mock American accent as she spoke.
"What was the… experiment meant to do?"
Argent took in a deep breath. "You ever watched the X-Files? And all that alien conspiracy stuff? You just think it's a load of bollocks, don't you? The government finding alien crash sites and capturing the aliens… you just don't let yourself believe it."
She smiled. "Well… here's living proof," she said, gesturing to herself.
Robin cocked an eyebrow. "You're an alien, then?"
"Not quite. The government was trying to… crossbreed a human and an alien, and my mum was one of their lucky unwitting test subjects."
The detective instincts in the Boy Wonder processed what she said. "Wait… one of the test subjects? There were others?"
She nodded silently. "There were others, but they never survived child birth. They brought in this other poor bugger… he was the only one besides me to survive to sixteen. And, lucky prat, he escaped. But he helped me to escape by wrecking the power systems. They had me practising my powers for so long in that bloody place, they never stood a chance when I made a break for it."
"Did you ever find out who the other one was?"
"No. I wish I did. I'd give anything just to be able to thank him."
Robin smiled. "I'm sure you'll find him. Who knows, maybe he's a Titan."
Argent laughed. "With my luck, he probably went loony and became a villain."
"Maybe," he laughed. His smile gradually faded. "Did the government ever come after you?"
Argent shook her head. "No. I suppose they were more interested in the other fella, whoever he was. Or maybe they will come after me, but just haven't yet. I don't know," she said, sighing as she shrugged. "I try not to think about it. Don't want to spend my whole life looking over my shoulder, you know?"
"No, but… I understand," Robin replied quietly, putting a supportive hand on her shoulder.
She looked over at him, a grateful look on her pale features. Then something else crossed over her face, and her eyes glazed over slightly. Suddenly yet slowly, she leant forward, her eyes closed and her lips pursed in preparation for a kiss. In an utter state of panic, Robin leant back, his eyes wide beneath his mask. They froze in that position, with Argent leant towards him, almost on top of him, and Robin leaning back in a pose that would be impossible to anyone who wasn't a trained gymnast. Argent opened her eyes in surprise, and the two proceeded to stare at each other directly in the eyes, neither moving.
A loud yawn from behind them broke their frozen forms. Argent sat back in her previous position while Robin leapt to his feet, both of them blushing furiously.
"What's going on?" Hot Spot yawned as he stretched, his closed eyes blissfully ignorant of what they had missed. As he opened his bleary eyes, he observed that Argent was facing slightly away from Robin, while the Boy Wonder had both hands on his hips, staring towards the city intently.
"What happened…?" he sighed wearily, shaking his head.
"Nothing! Absolutely no-thing!" Robin said loudly, making a show of walking around Hot Spot and away from Argent.
"I'm gonna get some sleep!" The Boy Wonder continued loudly, before robotically and quickly lying down on the ground.
Hot Spot sighed, putting a hand to his head.
Oh yeah. Most definitely something in the atmosphere.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After what seemed the longest eternity, they had finally reached the city. It was a strange mishmash of the many science fiction shows that Hot Spot had seen. Not quite Mos Eisley, yet not quite Coruscant. Okay, Hot Spot had only really seen Star Wars. But still, he was in awe of the city, wondering just how something like this could actually be built. The buildings towered above them even higher than the Titans Tower, though somehow they were thin enough that Hot Spot wondered how they didn't blow down.
He turned to Robin and Argent, and was heartened to find that they were as dumbstruck as he was. While he still didn't know what had happened between them while he was asleep, he was glad that it was seemingly forgotten. He looked at Robin questioningly.
"So? Where to?"
The Boy Wonder looked around the city, eyeing the locals as he did so. They seemed to be ignoring them, but seeming and doing were very different things. He took a deep breath as his eyes settled on one building in particular. With a smile on his face, he pointed in the direction of a glowing sign above what looked to Hot Spot like…
"A bar?" he asked, looking over at the Boy Wonder.
Robin just smiled and shrugged. "Where else?"
Argent nodded. "Haven't you ever seen Star Wars?"
Robin walked away and towards the bar, followed by Argent.
"But… but…"
Hot Spot sighed and shook his head, looking down at the ground. "As long as we don't drink anything… the air's driving you two crazy as it is…" he grumbled, slowly following them.
As he made his way into the bar, Hot Spot almost instantly retched.
Well… that stinks.
Robin and Argent didn't seem to be having the same problem, and Hot Spot just scowled at them.
"Fancy pants Titans with no sense of smell…" he mumbled, being wary to keep his eyes ahead. Even though he had never been on an alien planet before, even he knew that you don't look burly aliens in the eyes.
He bumped shoulders with one of said burly aliens, and smiled apologetically, almost powering up out of reflex.
"Sorry…" he said, putting up his hands defensively and backing away from him. At least, Hot Spot assumed it was a he. He turned around and almost bumped into yet another large and furry alien, although he managed to deftly avoid this one.
As he made his way past, he saw Robin talking to the bartender. Although he only came in on the tail end of the conversation, he got the gist of what was going on. Argent gave him a brief nod and a friendly smile as he approached.
"…want transport, you'll need to pay for it. I know plenty of people who would pay good money for your…" he paused, a grin crossing his blue and scaly features, "…services."
Scowling, the Boy Wonder stepped slightly in front of Argent. "She's not going anywhere."
"Not her," the bartender replied irritably. He nodded at Robin, his eyes widening lustfully. "You."
Hot Spot almost burst out laughing, and turned around to hold it in. As he did so, he noticed someone, or something, leaving the bar in an awful hurry while shooting furtive glances over his shoulder. From a distance, it looked like some kind of huge rat, although it was standing on its hind legs, its head horribly disproportionate with its body. Although he had no logical reason to suspect the alien… thing, whatever it was, Hot Spot just knew in his gut that he should stop him from getting away.
"Hey, you! Stop!"
The Rat Thing froze in its tracks, and then ran as fast as it could out of the bar. Letting out a frustrated grunt, Hot Spot powered up, knocking several patrons across the bar. He turned to Robin while he left the bar.
"Robin!"
The Boy Wonder turned from his nervous negotiations and was more than happy to have an excuse to leave. Argent smiled and shrugged at the disappointed bartender and flew off in pursuit.
Hot Spot pushed himself into a dead sprint down the 'street' after the Rat.
"Stop!" he yelled, though he doubted it would work a second time. Not wanting to incinerate it, he used a burst of flame from his hands to launch himself forward and towards the Rat.
Unfortunately, the Rat seemed to have caught wind of this, and, while dodging to its left, pulled out some kind of laser pistol from upon its person and fired. Hot Spot was sent across the 'street' and through the wall of a building opposite. The Rat turned into an alleyway on its left.
With a frustrated grunt, Hot Spot pushed himself up from the rubble. He spotted Robin running down the street and pointed to the alleyway the Rat had run down.
"He went that way!"
Robin nodded and quickly changed course, darting into the alleyway in hot pursuit. Hot Spot groaned as he pulled himself to his feet.
The Rat, meanwhile, was giving Robin just as much trouble. Blindly firing its laser pistol behind him, The Boy Wonder was dodging left and right so much he couldn't get any headway. His eyes thinning behind his mask, Robin pulled out his bo-staff and extended it to full length. Digging one end into the ground, he used it as a vaulting pole, tossing him into the air and into the path of the Rat.
Using trained precision, Robin landed deftly in front of the Rat, who skidded to a panicky halt, levelling its weapon at him. With a small smile and a quick twirl of Robin's staff, the Rat's laser pistol was sent flying away. Robin lifted his staff and brought it down, only for the Rat to move to its right, pushing out with its arms and roughly shoving Robin away. Much to his pained surprise, Robin was sent into the wall behind him, the force of the impact knocking the wind from him.
Okay, so… alien rats are stronger than humans. Remember that.
The aforementioned Rat had begun running down the alleyway to the opposite end. Its eyes widened as its path was blocked by the floating Argent. Holding out her hands, she easily pinned the alien to the wall with red energy.
Robin pushed himself to his feet in time to be joined by Hot Spot, who smiled.
"Having trouble, Robin?"
Robin attempted to level out his breathing. "At least he didn't knock me through a wall," he said, a smile on his face.
Hot Spot chose to ignore that comment and walked over to where Argent had pinned the Rat against the wall of the alleyway. He was immediately taken aback by just how ugly the thing was. Its left eye seemed to have two smaller eyes above it. Robin walked between the two, looking dead into the Rat's eyes.
"Who are you?"
"I ain't sayin' nothin'," it said, and Hot Spot grimaced. The Rats' big eye opened and closed as he spoke instead of its mouth. From the sound of it, it was most definitely male. Robin thinned his eyes and looked over to Argent.
He nodded, and Argent smiled evilly in return, tightening the grip of her red energy bonds around the Rat. He squealed in protest.
"All right, please, I'll talk!"
Hot Spot cocked an eyebrow.
Isn't it supposed to be harder than that?
Robin nodded at Argent, who eased off. The Rat took a deep breath.
"I'll ask again; who are you?"
"The name's Gnaww."
Robin's eyes thinned beneath his mask. "Why did you run from us?"
"You were chasin' me."
The Boy Wonder was silent for a moment, and then turned to look at Argent. Gnaww's eyes widened in shock.
"No, no, please! I was going to report you!"
Robin turned back around, his face as grim as Hot Spot had ever seen it. "Report us to who?"
"The… the Gordanians."
Robin paused. "Why? How did you know to report us to the Gordanians?"
Gnaww slowly reached into this jacket, and Argent squeezed him in response.
"Wait… Please! I'm just gonna show him somethin'!"
Robin nodded at Argent, who loosened the bonds. Taking another grateful breath, Gnaww reached into his jacket and pulled out a piece of paper. On it were the faces of Robin, Cyborg, Beast Boy, Raven and Starfire, with squiggles of writing below the pictures that Hot Spot assumed was some sort of alien language.
"They said that if any of these guys were seen, we should report it immediately. They said we'd get a big reward!"
Robin just stared at the piece of paper in front of him before looking back up at the alien. "Why are the Gordanians after us? Does it have something to do with Tamaran?"
"Not Tamaran; Tamaranian. Just her," he said, pointing to Starfire.
Robin's eyes glazed over beneath his mask. "It was a trap… Tamaran was never in trouble…" He scowled and looked back up at Gnaww.
"What do you know about this?" he yelled, making everyone around him jump with his sudden ferocity.
"Only r-rumours," Gnaww said, wincing slightly in anticipation of Robin's attack. When none came, he looked up at the Boy Wonder questioningly. The Boy Wonder was simply stood with his arms crossed, tapping his foot patiently.
"Well?" he spat, making Hot Spot flinch.
"Uh… w-well… you know that girl was meant to be delivered to the Citadel a while back, right?"
Robin nodded. "Right."
"Well, some humans freed her on Earth, and she's been staying with them ever since. The Citadel wasn't too happy about this, but they couldn't get her back 'cause there were so many freaky humans with weird powers on that planet. 'Sides, they were busy with wars and stuff. But recently, there was talk of someone with a grudge against the girl coming to the Citadel and offering to bring her to them. So obviously, they said yes."
"Who was it?"
"Nobody knows. These are just rumours. Rumour has it she's already been captured, and she's on her way now."
Robin tried his best not to let his emotions get the best of him. "Where are they going to take her?"
"The Citadel home world."
"And do you know where that is?"
"Of course, everyone knows th-" Gnaww replied instantly, before slapping a hand over his mouth. Although why he did that and not slap his hand over his eye/mouth/thing, Hot Spot didn't know.
Argent smiled. "And I'm guessing you've got a ship, too," she said, the smile quickly becoming a smirk.
"You're crazy! You can't just fly head first into the Citadel home world! You'll be ripped apart before you even land!"
Robin's face became even harder, if that were possible. "Then you'd better be a good pilot."
The large rat seemed ready to protest, but then went limp, letting out a resigned sigh. Hot Spot smile became sympathetic.
I know how you feel.
Hot Spot frowned.
What are you, nuts? You're sympathising with a giant alien rat!
Shaking his head, he followed the other Titans and their captive as they made their way out of the alleyway and to Gnaww's ship.
I guess that alien air's getting to me too.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(A/N: Well, it seems that most of the hi-jinks came before they arrived in the city, but hey… it's all good.
Now, fans of Superman: The Animated Series might recognise Gnaww from 'The Main Man, parts 1 and 2', and just in case you don't:
http/worldsfinestonline. com/WF/superman/reviews/ mainman2/ 01.jpg
Remember to remove the spaces before you use the link.
Justice League Unlimited fans might know the name of the government agency mentioned here, too, as well as the 'stout black woman', but I'm not gonna spell that out for you.
And yeah, 'Scum and Villainy', as in 'A Wretched Hive of'. Come on, it's a great line from a great movie!
Anyways, reviews bees goods.)