Chapter 12:

"Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently." -Henry Ford

Alek glanced nervously over his shoulder where Bay was sitting at his table. She was trembling and pale.

"Are you ok?" he asked her worriedly. Well, she was a millionaire's daughter. He didn't want to get in any trouble.

She breathed in and out, with loud gasps.

"Hey," Alek gently patted her hand. "You ok?"

She looked up at him, and he was shocked to see her eyes glistening with tears. Alek looked away. Tears scared him.

There was silence, and then Bay whispered, "I'm sorry."

"What do you have to be sorry about?" Alek asked.

"I had a schizophrenic attack," she said, looking up at him. "Sometimes I think the whole world is after me… then, I think I caused someone to hurt. I also have borderline OCD too. It's obsessive compulsive disorder. I'm scared for those I care about. That's why I came here. I wanted to make sure I hadn't hurt you."

Alek sat down next to her. "Tell me about it. Maybe I can help."

She was trying to calm down, and suddenly she reached over and gripped his hand tightly. Alek squeezed hers to, trying to comfort her.

"I have three sides… sort of, in a way I guess to my schizophrenia. There's the side when I was first five… when I was diagnosed with schizophrenia. Um… there's me now… that's one side. And there's one when I turn fifteen this August. August 22, actually. When I'm fifteen… I don't want to become that person Alek… I become depressed and angry… and…" her voice cracked in pain. "I… don't like people… I hate life… I hate… everybody, including myself. I don't think I can live like that Alek… I don't know what I'll do when I get there…"

Alek patted her shoulder awkwardly, feeling a cold grasp inside himself. How could he help?

"I've been to a lot of psychologists," Bay continued. "But they can't help… not really. My OCD sometimes does weird things… like I can tell you that there are exactly 167 houses in this neighborhood, and 54 of them have brick roofing. I don't count or anything… I just know… um… you have 1,548 eyelashes exactly. And sometimes I'm afraid to… touch anybody… I think I've hurt somebody… I think I've killed somebody. On the news, when I see like a car crash or something… I think I caused it… I think I messed up… and those people had to suffer for me…"

Alek hugged her, feeling her tears staining the jacket. "It's going to be ok Bay, don't give up."

He barely heard her reply as she choked out, "I just want to be normal."

xxx

Jorge was throwing disgusted looks at Julie as Connor gripped the steering wheel of his Mercedes until his knuckles turned white. Kathy was looking at her reflection in a mirror and applying lipstick.

They were going to try on their clothes for the wedding, Julie had told him. Jorge now tried to act disinterested as he tapped his fingers on the window and attempted to ignore the pounding of his heart in his chest. He really didn't want his dad to get married.

They reached the bridal shop where Kathy tried on a strapless white dress. It was pretty, Jorge would admit that. Kathy looked beautiful in it. He tried to ignore that fact, but it kept boring holes into his mind. He (and Julie) watched in agony as Connor and Kathy kissed.

Julie tried on her dress, and Jorge thought she looked nice, despite the fact that there was a huge scowl on her face. It was red, and Jorge thought she looked pretty good in red.

Next Jorge and Connor were fitted. Connor looked… different, Jorge thought. There he was in his snazzy suit tux thing… Jorge didn't know exactly how to explain it, but he felt a pain in his chest. I just want you back Dad, he thought. I just need you back.

When Jorge tried on his suit, he immediately knew something was wrong. It was baggy, making him look like a bum from the streets. It didn't fit his tall and skinny frame.

A worried looking lady with frizzy gray hair said that she would fix it. She took his measurements, and told them to come back in a week.

Jorge stumbled back to the Mercedes in an extremely bad mood.

However, it was improved when Julie insisted that they watched Harry Potter. Connor's forehead creased and his eyebrows met in the center. He spent the whole moving complaining about how artificial the whole plot line was. His mood was improved even more when Connor brought out whipped cream pie, where Kathy had to leave the room because she was "nauseous." Connor made her even more moody by watching two full episodes of Star Wars.

xxx

West told Taty he was leaving for the day, and she nodded. The kids were allowed one day off a week, to do whatever they wanted. West and Sarah crawled into the back seat of Bren's BMW, while Bren concentrated on the road ahead of her.

"So," West asked casually, "do you like Paul?"

"Paul's a sweet guy," Sarah answered.

West felt himself grimace, but tried to get a hold over his emotions.

Don't be jealous, he reminded himself. It makes you look bad.

He was starting to hate himself a little bit. Luckily, he didn't have that much time to wallow in self-pity because Bren had arrived at Jason's camp.

"Hey, follow me," he told Bren and Sarah. He signed in the guest book and shadowed by Bren and Sarah as they reached Room 27. He knocked, and a boy with reddish hair answered.

His eyes widened at the sight of the two girls and he shook his head, as if trying to remember that he had a girlfriend. West assumed that this was Pat.

"Hey. You're Pat right? I'm looking for Jason?"

Pat opened the door more wide and gestured inside. "I think he's in there."

West walked in and saw a bunch of boxers, Axe, and dirty shirts lying around on the floor. Quickly, he turned around and pushed Sarah and Bren out.

"You just stay right there, ok? I'll get Jason and bring him out."

They smiled knowingly, and West felt himself blush.

He went back in the room and saw Jason sitting casually in a chair. If West hadn't known him, he'd probably think that Jason was modeling for Abercrombie and Fitch or something.

"West." Jason said this calmly, but there was no mistaking the excitement in his voice.

"Hey Jason," West said, pulling him up from the chair. "I told you I'd come to visit, didn't I? Come outside, there's some girls I want you to meet." He lowered his voice to a whisper. "One's Sarah."

"The b-e-a-utiful one?" Jason asked with a smile.

West nodded, feeling his cheeks flame. Jason followed him out the door, closing it on a disappointed looking Pat.

xxx

Jason was feeling slightly uncomfortable as he met West's friends. They were nice of course, (West didn't befriend anybody who wasn't nice), but he could see that they were interested in him (in a way he didn't want them to be).

Bren was trying to catch his gaze, but instead of meeting her eyes, he suddenly found the carpeted floor extremely interesting.

Jason could see, however, why West was attracted to Sarah. She was beautiful and outgoing, (like him), bright and energetic, (also like West), and genuine (West's most valued trait in a girl).

Jason looked over at West, who was talking amiably to Sarah, as if Jason didn't exist. Jason didn't blame him. West was in his own world.

Suddenly, Jason wanted to push himself in. He wanted to exist. He wanted to do something. He wanted to take up space, not just be a good-looking figure just standing there.

Only he didn't know how.

Somebody saved him. Only it was a person he didn't particularly care for.

"Jason!" cried Becky, seeming to appear out of nowhere. She wrapped her arms around him, and Jason had the vague sensation that he was drowning.

"Who's this? You didn't tell me your friends were coming to see you," she said, pulling his head towards her. "I want to know everything, right now."

West looked at Becky, shocked by her radiating beauty, as everybody was. Then he seemed to get a hold of himself. Grinning at Jason, he arched an eyebrow.

In that one movement, he seemed to convey everything to Jason.

So, you picked yourself up a girl, didn't you?

Jason looked back at him in fear. No, I didn't actually. I don't even like this girl. She likes me. SHE LIKES ME!

West shook his head, the way a father did when his child was finally growing up. He shot a wicked look at Jason, who tried to stumble for words.

"This is Becky. She's… um…"

"I'm his girlfriend." Becky answered for him.

West arched another eyebrow. So, trying to cover it up Jason? Why'd you hide it? She's b-e-a-utiful.

Jason shot a frantic look at West. NO! No! You're getting it all wrong. I HATE this girl.

West glanced at him. Yeah. Right.

Jason found his voice. "This is Becky. She's not my girlfriend. In fact, I don't even know her. Well not really. Well, I sort of do. Wait… just never mind." Jason sort of hated himself right now.

Becky glared at him and walked away angrily, while Jason struggled to explain.

"Um… I'm sorry…"

West grinned. "It's all good pal."

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