I can't believe this is happening. Tsukushi rubbed her forehead as if by doing so, she could erase the words that hung still in the air between them. Oh god, I should have known something like this would happen.

"Well?" Doumyouji demanded impatiently. "Will you help me or not?"

Tsukushi took a deep breath, and wheeled to face him, "You stupid man," she shouted, "Didn't you listen to a thing I said this afternoon? Why couldn't you have asked me that four days ago? Even three? Why did you have to wait so long? It's too late! I can't. . . I can't help you now! Why don't you go ask Shigeru—She'd be more than willing to help you! Or even Sakurako?"

"Don't you want me to remember?" Doumyouji challenged right back. "Weren't you the one to tell me to try harder. So I did! You're the stupid one here! At least try to be consistent!"

"What do you think I'm trying to do?" Tsukushi slumped into a chair across from Tsukasa, leaning her elbows on the table, as she glared at him. "You really didn't listen to anything I said, did you?"

"Sure I did." Doumyouji growled, "So you're dating Rui. You can still help me." Not that he even understood why she was dating Rui in the first place, "You said you loved me. Well, then If you love me, you'll help me."

Is he really that dense? "It's not that Simple!" Tsukushi threw up her hands in frustration.

"Why not? It was your face I remembered, and you all tell me that you're the one I forgot. So you should be the one to teach me."

Tsukushi tried a new tactic. "You don't need my help. You've started remembering on your own."

"Not enough!"

Tsukushi sighed again. Maybe Doumyouji's memory loss hadn't really changed him as much as she'd thought. He was still demandingly selfish and simpleminded. He couldn't even seem to comprehend how much it hurt her just to spend time around him, while he treated her like a stranger or casual acquaintance. And when he did remember, if he remembered everything, would he regain the love he felt? Or would that have faded too, as time went by? And what about Rui? It was a complicated equation, one which Tsukushi wasn't sure she could solve. She needed advice, and reassurance. She needed someone to tell her that it was going to be ok, that this whole situation wasn't going to be a total fiasco. She needed Rui.

"I'll think about it.' She temporized. "Why don't you go round up the others for dinner?" If she got rid of him for few minutes, then maybe she could think again.

"You cooked?" Doumyouji asked, startled. He'd been so absorbed in his argument with her that he hadn't even noticed the task she'd set herself to.

"Of course."

"Isn't that what the cooks are for? What can you make anyway?"

Tsukushi refused to dignify that question with an answer. "Go get the others." She repeated firmly. Please, Doumyouji, get out of my kitchen. Give me space to breathe. Stop fixing me with that look. I don't know what that look means. . . I can't read you any more. . . please go away!

Doumyouji slowly rose from the table, still fixing Tsukushi with that penetrating gaze as he did so. "I don't recognize my friends any more. Even though I see them, they're not the same. You changed them, didn't you? You changed me too. I need to know how. . . Am I really that much of a burden, that no one wants to help me?" A tinge of sadness colored his voice as he thought of the conversation he had just overheard. Not wishing to show more weakness, he quickly covered up his plea, "I'll go find the others."

". . . Doumyouji. . . ." Tsukushi looked up to find herself talking to an empty room. Damn that man! She already knew she would help him. What choice did she have, after all? Even if she didn't love him, she was the kind of girl who couldn't stand to see anyone unhappy. She always helped whomever asked her for aid, no matter how much she may personally dislike them. But it was going to be hard. ". . . Why did you have to forget everything? Why did you have to remember now?" He'd always had the worst timing.

------

Soon, the entire group had gathered in the kitchen, drawn in either by the clarion call of Doumyouji's impressively loud voice, or by the enticing odors wafting through the house. Arriving first, Rui quickly took stock of what needed to be done, and took it upon himself to set the table, since Tsukushi had long since sent all the servants away to find other tasks.

"Why are we eating in the kitchen?" Sakurako pouted in confusion. "What's wrong with the dining room?"

"It's cozier in here," Tsukushi shrugged, "I don't know how you people can stand the formality all the time."

"Oh! This'll be so much Fun!" Shigeru exclaimed, settling herself into place at the table, "I've never had Tsukushi's cooking before!"

"Where are the bowls?" Rui, still poking through the large kitchen's many cupboards, was having a hard time with his self-appointed task.

"Oh, let me see!" Shigeru hopped back up, and between the two of them, the table was soon set for seven.

Finally, everyone was settled in around the table.

"What is this?" Akira dangled a morsel in front of his face.

"Dunno." Soujiro shrugged, as he snatched the tidbit and devoured it. "Tastes good, though."

"I don't like poor people's food." Doumyouji growled sullenly, as he stared at the steaming bowls.

"Shut up and eat. It's better for you than that fancy shit you're used to." Tsukushi snapped back, offended by his offhand dismissal of the meal.

"I like Tsukushi's cooking." Under the table, Rui's hand stealthily sought out Tsukushi's and squeezed it reassuringly.

"You would," Sakurako sniffed.

"It is good." Shigeru affirmed, "I wish I knew how to cook."

"You'll give yourselves stomachaches eating that."

"Hey, Makino, what is this? I want more."

"Soujiro, that was my plate."

"Fine, I'll take Tsukasa's then. He's not eating anything."

"Doumyouji, are you going to eat or not?" Tsukushi glared across the table.

"I'm not hungry."

"He's just sulking."

"Why does he have to be so moody?"

"Stop talking about me like I'm not here!" Tsukasa slammed his fist to the table, suddenly.

"Then stop acting like such a child." Rui's eyes dared Tsukasa to challenge him.

"Rui, don't start." Soujiro could smell trouble brewing.

"No. I want to here what he's going to say." Tsukasa was more than willing to meet the challenge.

"Can we not argue at dinner? I want this to be a happy meal." Shigeru too, tried to keep the peace.

"He shouldn't insult me." Doumyouji was sullen. "All of you. You're treating me like I don't exist. I don't like it. And what makes you so special anyway, Rui? Makino there told me about you. I don't think I can respect a guy who takes another's girlfriend."

Rui's face grew grim, ". .. You forgot her! You cast her aside! You have no right to talk! How could you do that to her! You selfish asshole, when are you going to learn respect for other's feelings!"

"Everybody Shut UP!" Tsukushi, who'd been eating silently through much of this exchange, gave up at last. Standing, she glared around at the entire table. "I just wanted to eat one meal in peace! Is that really so hard? Why couldn't you just eat the damned food? Why do you have to ruin everything?" Throwing down her napkin, she spun away, "I'm going to take a bath. I think I'd like to be alone for a while."

"Tsukushi. . ." Rui stretched out an imploring hand at her retreating back, but she'd already left.

"I'm going after her." Shigeru stood.

"Let her be." Akira grabbed the blond girl's wrist.

"Don't you care that's she's upset? Someone should keep her company!" Shigeru's eyes teared up in frustration.

"Let her be." Rui echoed Akira's sentiments, "I'll go apologize in a bit."

"How can you be so calm?! You two—" Shigeru glared at Rui and Tsukasa, "ruined all Tsukushi's hard work. And now you're just sitting there? You men are such jerks! You're both so selfish!"

"And you talk too much." Doumyouji grumbled, "Why is Everything about Makino?" Nobody seemed to care about him-- about his feelings, anymore.

"I give up," Soujiro remarked to nobody in particular, "I'm going to go eat on the porch." Picking up his plate, he left the kitchen for the peace of the outdoors.

"I'm with him." Akira shook his head ruefully as he too departed.

"I'm going to take a walk." And Rui was gone.

"I think I hate everyone." Shigeru, feeling like she was about to cry at the way the evening as shaping up, retreated to her own room.

"Well," Sakurako broke the silence that now filled the kitchen, "That leaves you and me, Tsukasa. Better eat up before everything gets cold," She dug in.

"Aren't you bothered by all this?" Doumyouji peered questioningly at the cute girl next to him.

"Sure, But really, you and Rui fighting over Tsukushi is nothing new." Sakurako shrugged, "I was upset earlier. I'm done now. None of you ever seem to make up your minds. It gets old." At least I made up my mind. I don't want Tsukasa anymore.

"Oh." Doumyouji grimaced, and absentmindedly started to eat. "I really fought over that girl?"

"You really don't remember shit, do you?" Sakurako laughed. "You turned me down for her, you broke your engagement with Shigeru. . ." She began to tick off items on her fingers.

"Wait!. . ." Doumyouji coughed, choking on his rice as the words registered, "I was engaged?"

"Yup! Shigeru told me all about it. She even tried to seduce you here. I can't believe you didn't go for her. She's almost as hot as me!" Sakurako preened unconsciously, "We're beginning to think that you're going to die a virgin. . .. Ah well, at least Tsukushi won't. That's some kind of progress at least." She couldn't help snicker a bit, as she remembered, "Man, you two were pathetic. You were crazy for her for so long, but you didn't do anything! Rui managed in just two days. . . but then, he always was her best friend. He always understood her better than you, so it shouldn't be that surprising. . ."

Doumyouji listened in mesmerized fascination, as Sakurako gossiped about his past life. He had the sensation of watching some absolutely horrific accident—Something nauseating twisted deep inside with each word she spoke, but he couldn't look away, couldn't close his ears to the salacious details, while she prattled on about Tsukushi and Rui.

Her words were making his head spin. Doumyouji looked down at his plate, trying to steady his vision. Much to his surprise, he found he'd eaten everything on it. Maybe food poisoning was what was making him dizzy? But he knew that wasn't it.. . He leaned forward to cradle his spinning head in his hands. He wished the world would stop whirling. And why was his gut churning so?

Sakurako noticing his suddenly ill expression, stopped in mid-sentence, "Tsukasa, are you all right?"

With an effort, Doumyouji nodded, "Just a bit dizzy. I think I'll go outside."

"Are you sure? You don't look well. You're not supposed to do anything active you know!" Sakurako glance down meaningfully at Doumyouji's bandages.

"I'm Fine!" Tsukasa repeated irately, attempting to bolster his blatant lie with a bit more bullshit. "That stupid hole is finally starting to heal. I just need some fresh air."

"Want me to come with you?" Even though she didn't really want to, Sakurako felt she had to offer.

"No." Doumyouji blinked frantically, trying to clear his vision. Something unpleasant was welling up inside. He wanted to be alone when it hit. Whatever it was.

"OK, I was just asking." Sakurako sniffed. Really. He didn't have to be so rude all of a sudden. But then, Tsukasa was always rude. It was part of his 'charm.' She sighed, as she watched him hastily staggering from the room. Something was wrong with him. Something other than his wound. Maybe she should go ask the guys what he and Tsukushi had talked about this afternoon? It could be important. They'd know. They always seemed to know everything important.

------

Tsukasa stumbled out on to the back porch into the bracing chill of the night air. Off on the front porch, he could hear Soujiro and Akira talking faintly. Above him, a crescent moon was just rising over the dim silhouettes of ancient pine groves. Up here in the mountains, the night sky was clear, and stars twinkled brightly overhead. Tsukasa appreciated none of this beauty. Instead, he let himself crumple to the cold wooden floor as a fresh wave of nausea rolled through him, bringing with it a new memory. . . .

To be continued.