Back To School HUZZAH!
"Oh my god Ashley! You're going to get so fat!" – Carrie Placebogern
Ahh. I love trains. Especially the Hogwarts Express. The scenery rushing by the window at high speeds is highly amusing. It's like ZOOM there goes a tree. And the cows are hilarious. It's like slow motion eating. Down….then up. Like a bobble head! It's so amazing. Really? No. But that's okay; we all will get over it.
"Oh Charlie!" I heard a screech come from right outside the compartment, and Monica and I exchanged a look and I got up and pulled the door open.
"Hey, Carrie? Can you please shut up? I mean I have to deal will that god awful voice of yours all year and it's just too early, can't you guys just go to an abandoned compartment and make out and get over it?" I said as I looked at a bewildered Carrie and Charlie standing there. Carrie had tears streaking down her face and it seemed as if Charlie had broken up with her.
"Oh Ashley!" she cried as she latched onto me. I gave a loud shout and she continued sobbing all over me.
"Carrie, get off of me," I said calmly as I tried to pry myself free from her iron grip. Her grip is worse than Monnie, and Monnie has the death grip of doom. Oh lookie, Charlie went away. Hallelujah. He could have at least helped me get her off me. But nooo, he had to go suck the face off of some other nameless girl.
"CARRIE, GET THE HELL OFF OF ME!" I finally had to resort to screaming. I actually was annoyed. And I never get annoyed, only at people who are on the People Who Piss Me Off list which consist of Carrie, Adrianna, Shelly, Sandra, and Charlie. He keeps popping up, doesn't he? Weird. Very weird. Oh well, it really doesn't matter.
I shoved Carrie off me, stomped into the compartment Monica and I were camping out in, and slammed the door shut.
"I never want to have to go through that trauma again," I told her.
"Yea, you might have to see a counselor!" she joked back.
"Yup! And then I'll have to drag you and the others so I can have…uhhh how many shoulders do we have?" I asked confusedly. See I knew the answer, I was just toying with her. I was, seriously. I was! It's not like I'm stupid enough not to know what four times two is.
About a half hour passed and we were still sitting there, chatting about our summer. I didn't tell her about the last week or so, I probably would never tell anyone. Not that it's embarrassing or anything, but they'd probably just start laughing at me and tease me about it. I know I'm a hypocrite, because I do the same thing to them, but for some reason I hate being laughed at. It makes me feel as if I'm a deformity or something and that really scares me.
So my lips are sealed. Anyway, Hannah and Chaki flew in, well actually Hannah did, but they had lots to tell about the prefect meetings. I was glad I wasn't a prefect, from what I heard from Bill, it's hell. Of course, he was basking in the comforts of being Head Boy last year.
Next year Chaki will probably be the Head Girl, because, well, it's Chaki and she's the only person I know who actually deserves the position. Anyway, they came in and we talked and joked around for a while, I actually had to smack Hannah a few times, but other then that the ride was pretty calm.
That was until the king of morons came sauntering in, back from his latest make out session and plopped down next to me. See, a regular compartment held six people and there were only four of us. I had moved from my comfy window seat to make room for Chaki, so I had to put up with Sir I've-Been-Around-The-Block-A-Lot sitting next to me.
Eric came in after him and sat down next to Hannah, but I didn't notice at first, because of the red headed fiend sitting next to me.
"Why are you here?" I asked him, breaking the deafening silence that seized the compartment.
"Just visiting my favorite gal pal!" he said cheerily, throwing his arm around me. I grabbed the closed book that was on Chaki's lap and whacked him in the face. Just my luck, it was a heavy book.
"What was that for!"
"For being assertive and moronic."
"What!"
"You heard me. Now scram!" I yelled.
"And leave my best bud alone in a compartment full of girls?" This was the first time I noticed Eric was there. And he was sitting next to Hannah, beet red.
"Fine. I'll give up every last shred of dignity I have in hopes that those two will finally get over themselves and ask the other out. I mean c'mon, how dense are they?"
"Pretty dense. He moans and groans, she'll never like me! What ever shall I do?" Charlie mimicked a very girly Eric.
"Yea, and she's all like, I gotta dress up! How do I look? Oh why doesn't he like me? Why can't I be perfect?" I said, acting like Hannah was when she got in the mood to complain. Meanwhile, Chaki was reading her book while smiling broadly. Monica was practically falling off her seat in tears. Hannah was glaring at me through her deep red flushed face and Eric was trying to stop blushing.
"But one is Slytherin," I said, hoping to get Charlie to follow along. Charlie could get real funny when he started.
"And the other is a Gryffindor," he replied, catching my drift.
"A tragic love story!" we both dramatically sighed. It was hilarious. Of course Charlie's younger brother Percy, who was starting his first year at Hogwarts, had to come in and ruin the moment.
"Can you please be quiet, I'm trying to study," the snotty little brat asked, well, snottily. He then shut the door and apparently walked away. I slouched down in the seat and said, "He ruins all the fun!"
Hannah reached over and smacked me, and then smacked Charlie. We both grumbled a bit and then quieted down.
Charlie quietly talked with Eric, Eric and I had switched seats. It was cool, because all we did was glance at one another and we knew what the other wanted. I have a good relationship with my brother; no matter how annoying he is I will always stick up for him and support him. Great, now I sound like some old hag. Wonderful.
Well my thought strayed away form Eric and towards Charlie. It was amazing how a month could change a person. I mean last year there would have been no way he would have been here. He was so mean last year. I think he might have actually grown up.
Which was weird. Very weird. It wasn't normal for someone to suddenly change, unless they were trying to impress someone, or they were trying to impress someone before and they dropped that fake shell.
That's one thing I despise. Fake shells. People shouldn't hide behind a façade. They should face their fears, no matter how hard it is or no matter how painful it is. If you just hide, your life will be an empty, pointless experience and you will die unhappy.
Back to the point, Charlie was being very weird. He was acting very strange. But I didn't dwell upon it; instead I took out a little notebook. The notebook was a collection of little stories I would write whenever I was bored. I needed something to do so I decided to write a little bit. I wrote a really depressing poem because I knew Hannah was inadvertently looking over my shoulder, and it's really funny to watch her worry.
A great philosopher once said, "Hannah doesn't need exercise; she gets more than she needs from worrying in place." Actually I believe her mother said that. It's quite amusing.
I glanced over at her, and saw worry written on her face. But when she saw me grinning like the Cheshire cat, she smacked me upside the head and turned and pouted at the wall. Eric and Charlie just stared at me, while Chaki and Monica, used to this behavior, ignored everyone as there were in a deep conversation on something only they could understand.
It was creepy, the way they talked about things. They once tried to explain to me and I just gave them a blank stare. This was over Christmas break when Hannah was in the Hospital Wing because her younger sister Lily decided it would be fun to throw really heavy things at her.
Lily was a sweet little monster. She was seven, nine years younger than us, and she liked to cause trouble. She was actually the same age as Charlie's younger brother, Ron. If they ever meet at Hogwarts, Ron is going to run as far as he can, I just know it.
Ron is the complete opposite than the twins when it comes to me. While the twins flock to me, Ron runs away whenever he sees me. I mean I know he must be a little freaked out that I told the twins to turn his favorite stuffed animal into a spider, but still. Oh well, you can't please everybody.
The train ride passed quickly, and nothing of importance except everyone climbing over themselves to get to the food cart. It has a much more sophisticated name, but I don't pay attention enough to know it.
We finally got to Hogwarts and Hannah, Monica, Chaki, and I ran off to a carriage. Luckily carriages only hold four people, so we wouldn't have any unexpected guests this time.
"So guys, what are we gonna do for the feast? It should definitely be better than our last prank," I asked. We always did a back to school prank. We think our idols, the legendary Marauders, did something of the sort. And the beginning of the year prank was the best because it was spontaneous.
"Well we could kidnap someone or something," Chaki offered. I know, Chaki seems like a kind, sweet, innocent girl, but underneath, she's an evil, scheming, but really fun girl.
"Let's blow something up!" Hannah exclaimed. Monica, Chaki, and I turned to her and all said no at the same time. I mean really, blowing up stuff is like so last year! Totally! Like sure! Like I just got a manicure! The sun! I swear! It's bleaching up my gorgeous hair! Go go! Fight fight! Gee I hope I look alright! Cause I got a date tonight! GO ME! Whoopee!
I muttered the last word under my breath and the three of them looked at me oddly.
"Great, now she's talking to herself," Hannah said.
"I didn't do it I swear!" I protested. I didn't do it. I swear. Though it's not nice to swear. Nope.
"Well we could make something disappear," Monica said after a few minutes, reverting back to our other conversation.
"Like the Sorting Hat!" I explained the idea that had popped into my head.
"Yea, that'd be funny! Hannah, do you know any invisible spells?" Chaki asked Hannah. You se, in our group, I was the one who came up with the basic idea, Monica developed it and Chaki polished it off to perfection. Then we had Hannah perform it because she didn't really care if she got caught, and plus it added to her evilness. Except this time Monica and I were switched, so we switch on and off a lot. But still he structure is basically the same.
"Okay this is what we'll do," Chaki said after a couple of minutes.
The carriage came to a halt and we had finished our planning. We exited the comfy car with its plush interior and velvety seats…
We went into the Great Hall, huddled together for a bit, and then I walked over to the Gryffindor table and plopped down next to my twin.
"What'd you do this time?" Charlie asked me suspiciously.
"What?" I looked at him innocently, a huge grin implanted on my face.
"Oh come on, everyone knows you and your little group do a back to school prank every year," Carrie said snootily. She was really getting on my nerves.
"Geez, what crawled up your ass and died?" I asked her, mildly annoyed.
"I loved him so much!" she replied as she broke down crying. Shelly, Adriana, and Sandra were immediately at her side, comforting her. I blinked and realized that my stomach was making demands for an offering. See my stomach demands offerings three times a day, if it doesn't get what it wants; it makes me feel like crap. Yes it's true, my stomach rules my life. Luckily I get lots off exercise otherwise I'd be the size of Russia. I'd waddle around like a penguin!
Well my stomach was getting really mad, so I shouted out, "Where's the grub? I'm getting hungry here!"
Luckily Dumbledore took that as a sign to begin the sorting. "Let the Sorting begin!"
This was the highlight of the whole night. Luckily, before Dumbledore had spoke those words, everyone was talking and no one noticed the Sorting Hat mysteriously disappear a few moments before.
There was a collective gasp, and then the Sorting Hat burst out into song.
A thousand years ago or more
When I was newly sewn,
There lived four wizards of renown,
Whose names are still well known:
Bold Gryffindor, from wild moor,
Fair Ravenclaw, from glen,
Sweet Hufflepuff, from valley broad,
Shrewd Slytherin, from fen,
They shared a wish, a hope, a dream,
They hatched a daring plan
To educate young sorcerers
Thus Hogwarts School began.
Now each of these four founders
Formed their own house, for each
Did value different virtues
In the ones they had to teach.
By Gryffindor, the bravest were
Prized far beyond the rest;
For Ravenclaw, the cleverest
Would always be the best;
For Hufflepuff, hard workers were
Most worthy of admission;
And power-hungry Slytherin
Loved those of great ambition.
While still alive they did divide
Their favorites from the throng,
Yet how to pick the worthy ones
When they were dead and gone?
'Twas Gryffindor who found the way,
He whipped me off his head
The founders put some brains in me
So I could choose instead!
Now slip me snug about your ears,
I've never yet been wrong,
I'll have a look inside your mind
And tell where you belong!
I think the Sorting Hat has seven songs or something that it repeats every seven years. Anyway, by now people were pretty freaked out. The first years looked terrified. It was quite amusing. But unfortunately one of the teachers realized what exactly was going on and performed the spell for unmasking things. The Sorting Hat appeared, in all its ratty glory waiting patiently to be placed upon a frightened eleven-year-old's head.
I glanced up at Dumbledore, just briefly, in case he got suspicious and I noticed that twinkle in his eye was shining brighter than usual. It's creepy that twinkle. In fact Dumbledore reminds me a lot of Santa Clause. Of course, not many people acknowledge Santa on our little island, but I here he's really popular in other places.
Anyway, the sorting was done and we could FINALLY eat. Except Dumbledore just had to give a speech first.
"Welcome to a brand new school year! Now may I remind you that the Forbidden Forest is forbidden, so I don't want to catch any of you there. Now let the feast begin!" and with that he clapped his hands and food appeared.
"Finally!" I said very loudly. I practically wolfed down my food, got seconds, ate that too, and finally finished up with a huge third helping. After I had finished I sat back and said, "Whew, I'm stuffed!"
"Oh my god Ashley! You're going to get so fat!" Carrie screeched at me. It seems as if she finally got over herself and stopped crying.
"Well then whatever guy has to deal with me will get a fat tub of lard instead of a normal human being," I retorted. "And plus I'm about the same size as Eric, so you're insulting him. Eric also happens to be the best friend of Charlie, so insulting Charlie's best friend is the same as insulting Charlie, so in fact by insulting me, you're insulting Charlie as well."
I smiled at this and she burst into tears and started apologizing profusely to Charlie who just looked at her like she was a nuisance, which is exactly what she was.
After dessert was served and I had a few helpings of that, everyone was filed out of the Great Hall. Suddenly Snape was up next to me.
"Miss Yata, Professor Dumbledore would like to see you."
Uhoh. Busted. Well I suppose fiver years at Hogwarts was better than none. I walked over to where Dumbledore was standing with McGonagall and my friends.
"This is an outrage! For years we have tolerated your little jokes! This is the last straw! All four of you will be severely punished!" Snape babbled.
"What for?" I asked.
"For pulling that prank during the feast!" he yelled.
"Prove it," Chaki said with a smug look on her face. Dumbledore raised an eyebrow and McGonagall just looked at her stonily.
"Excuse me?" Snape asked in disbelief.
"Prove that Hannah, Monica, Chaki, and I had anything to do with that prank. Because if you can't prove if we did it, then there's no way you can punish us for something we didn't do," I explained, offering him an understanding of Chaki's supreme wisdom. Heh. Not gonna comment on that comment.
Snape just slowly turned redder and redder and I got sick of standing around looking at him preparing to explode.
"That's twenty points from Gryffindor for being rude Miss Yata," McGonagall said. Great. I think that's a record for losing points on the very first day back.
"Yes well you do have a point and there's nothing we can do, so you four can go back to your dorms. Goodnight," Dumbledore said, with the twinkle back in his eye. I smiled and headed off towards the Gryffindor tower. I would probably spend a few days there, and then set up camp in Ravenclaw or the dungeons.
I finally got to the common room; I was told the password by the Head Girl wandering around in the halls. I climbed up the stairs to the dreaded room that was called my dorm. I hated my dorm. By now Carrie and her cronies would have the place all decorated and it would be sickening. I'm serious too. It's awful how much she messes up the place!
Well I walked into that dreaded room and I grabbed my pajamas out of my trunk. They consisted of some of Eric's old boxers and an oversized shirt that said 'I live in my own little world. But don't worry they know me here.'
I changed and hopped into bed, ignoring Carrie and her friends completely.
OMG I UPDATED! IT IS SO AMAZING! HUZZAH! I've never actually got past the second chapter in a story before, so consider this a milestone. I really don't feel like going through it now, so I apologize for any mistakes. This chapter is also the longest I've ever written too, so that's cool as well! MOOHAHAHAHA! I shall go work on the next chapter, which might take a while as well, as I have no clue what's going to happen Oh well, until next time my pretties!
I might as well say it now: I DON'T OWN ANYTHING! I'M UNDER 18 SO SUE MY PARENTS NOT ME
Okay all done.