Wooh, I never thought this story would keep going . Thanks to: Lily Vendrem, Yume no Zencho, Avacados are evil, anonymous, and my dear friend Val who has been waiting ever so patiantly for the vincentXalucard fic. I'm so glad every one liked it!
Water logic Chapter three
-or-
Meeting the parents
By ISMA
Valentines day. A special occasion for lovers of all sorts. Girls and boys walked hand in hand in Konoha park, birds sung in the trees, bachelors drank to excess, Rock Lee and Sabaku no Gaara sat alone together by the pond and threw rocks at ducks. It was all very romantic.
They had exchanged presents a few hours before. Lee had gotten Gaara a foot rub and a thermos filled with soup. Gaara had gotten Lee a pair of shoes. Stolen shoes. From Naruto.
Neither of them really understood the point of Valentines day but it was very romantic none the less. Lee loved the shoes. Gaara loved the soup too, but he always loved soup. Gaara believed that nothing could be more filling, more romantic, more absolutely orgasmic than soup... Or blood... Or sex. Not that he had had sex... With Lee. Not that he wanted sex with Lee. Not that he didn't want sex with Lee and hadn't they been talking about soup?
Lee believed that 'it's the thought that counts' and that Naruto's shoes always did seem a bit cooler than his own.
Later, after the ducks had vacated the pond and Gaara had run out of rocks they lay together, entwined (but not naked), enjoying the comfortable togetherness that was almost never found on valentines day. While Sakura was bemoaning her lack of chocolate only a few miles away, and Sasuke was trying to get rid of his copious amounts of it, and Naruto was looking for his shoes, Gaara and Lee were spending a nice evening together for the first time in over a month.
It was for that very reason that something in Lee's brain chose that moment to spit out what was on its mind. A few sentences that would shatter the peaceful mood like Gai-sensei shatters ear drums. Indeed, it was the nature of man to choose these very moments in which to speak.
"Gaara..." Lee began, unknowing of his coming doom, "What is this?"
"Hhn?" Gaara mumbled, his mind tangled in thoughts of soup and sex and Lee's hair.
"This... Relationship. What is it?"
"It is a relationship." Gaara explained, quite sure of himself.
"I know but... What am I to you?"
"You are Lee." Gaara told him.
"That's not what I meant!" Lee said, exasperated.
"...?" Gaara responded, annoyed at his pillow's sudden desire for conversation.
There was a long silence in which Lee brooded and Gaara forgot about the whole business. There were much more interesting things for Gaara to contemplate, such as water and trees and the shape of Lee's nose. Gaara loved Lee's nose. It was the perfect shape. Flawless in every way and...
"I want to meet your parents." Lee shot out, startling Gaara's contemplations of his schnotz.
"I have no parents." Gaara said, still not understand what in the seven hells Lee was talking about.
"Then I want to meet your siblings." Lee told him, not even phased by Gaara's brusque remark. He was moving now, causing Gaara no small amount of discomfort. The sand nin hoped to get this strange bout of talking over with so he could go back to the more important things. Not that he didn't like talking with Lee, he just didn't like talking with Lee right now.
"You have met my siblings." Gaara grumbled.
"I briefly made out with you in front of them before you walked into the sunset." Lee groused, "That does not count as meeting."
"Yes it does." Gaara told him bluntly. After all, some people simply needed telling.
"Why are you so dead set against me meeting your family?" Lee said. Gaara could hear the beginnings of a hissy fit. Lee did not have them often, their had only been one other occurrence, but when he did they were top-notch, world-class hissy fits.
"You have met my family." He insisted despite the looming danger. Let no man say that Gaara was a coward.
"Fine! Then you can meet my parents." Lee declared. He was sitting up now, Gaara was dumped on the ground, and his arms were crossed in a stance known to arguing lovers all over the world. Unfortunately, Gaara didn't get that memo.
"You don't have parents either." He growled back at the leaf-nin, loosing his temper just the slightest bit.
"That is beside the point!" The shout rang out so loud that it startled birds from the trees for miles around, and made Naruto pause in his quest-for-shoes.
"This is stupid." Gaara said. He stood and left, as he was often want to do, without a single word.
"No it's not..." Lee muttered to himself, slumping back down on to the ground. Now he was alone, on Valentines day, with no Gaara. It was all his fault.
Elsewhere, Gaara stumped through Kohona in a foul mood. The people in the streets quickly stepped out of his way and small children began to cry at his approach. Lee was angry at him for some strange unknowable reason and Gaara was alone on Valentines day. Even Gaara got upset at being alone on Valentines day.
Gaara finally slouched himself to the Ichiraku Ramen stand, all alone, and ordered himself ramen. Ramen would make him feel better, he told himself, ramen makes everything better.
The ramen failed to help. Gaara slumped down on the countertops after just one bite, it tasted like sadness.
"Are you all right?" asked a strangely comforting voice. Gaara looked up, his eyes meeting those of a smiling Chunin. The leaf-nin had a moment of shock, realizing that he had just addressed the sand demon of Sunagakure, but that was quickly stifled when he noticed the look of absolute despair on the Kazekage's face.
"I'm Iruka." He said, his eyes crinkling, "I teach at the academy."
Gaara looked Iruka over, mentally assessing his strengths. The chunin looked weak, but at the same time he produced a sense of comfort that seemed to flow off his body in waves. Gaara imagined that if he remembered his mother she would feel something like Iruka. The chunin was so comforting merely through his presence. It was like hot chocolate and a teddy bear wrapped up in one large person-shaped package.
"You are very brown." He told the chunin. Brown was a nice color, Gaara thought, brown was the lullaby color.
"Thank you." Iruka responded. He waited for Gaara to become more comfortable, and to maybe tell him what the problem was. Gaara spent a moment of contemplation before deciding that Iruka must have some special powers of knowledge, definitely more powerful than Kankuro. And so, Gaara spoke.
"What does it mean when someone wants you to meet his parents and asks stupid questions and makes ramen taste bad?" He demanded.
"Well..." Iruka began, untangling the sentence mentally, "What sort of person is this?"
"A Lee shaped person." Gaara told him.
"I mean what is your relationship to him." Iruka said, mentally cheering Lee for getting such an adorable maniac for a boyfriend.
"That is what he asked me!" Gaara cried, his head hitting the tabletop again.
"what did you say?" Asked Gaara's stand-in psychiatrist.
"He is Lee!" Gaara's frustration and confusion mounted, his eyes almost beginning to tear as he struggled to understand the inner workings of Lee.
"Well, he wants to know what he is to you..."
Gaara made a noise that was a strange combination of confusion and anger.
"Everyone is something to you." Iruka explained, "Your sister, your friend, your enemy. Like me. I am your acquaintance and your confidant." Gaara briefly wondered what a confidant was before his mind snapped him back to the matter at hand.
"He is my Lee!" He growled.
"Hmmmm." Iruka said. The thinking noise put Gaara on edge, he leaned in expectantly and hoped for an understandable answer. Iruka obviously had Amazing Brown Powers of Thinking, and would produce an answer that would fix the problem.
"I think..." Iruka began slowly, "That Lee wants you to say he's your boyfriend."
"What?" Gaara shot out, greatly disappointed in the powers of brown, "is a boyfriend?"
"It is..." Iruka struggled to find an explanation that Gaara would understand, "It is you and Lee."
"It is?" Gaara was amazed.
"Well, you go on dates right?" Iruka asked.
"We do?" Gaara said, more confused than he had been at the beginning.
"You go out, just the two of you, and do special things." Iruka said. Gaara thought. He remembered trips to the ramen stand, the park, the movies. He remembered catching leaves with Lee at two in the morning. Those had been dates?
"Ye-es." He said tentatively.
"And you enjoy spending time with Lee all alone?" Iruka asked.
"Yes." Gaara said. After all, he only spent time with Lee alone. No one else was worth the effort.
"And you hold hands?" Iruka asked.
"Yes." Gaara answered. He barely even noticed in now, Lee was the only one who could get through the sand.
"And you kiss?" Iruka asked finally, his eyes crinkling even higher.
"Yes!" Gaara responded enthusiastically. Iruka blushed for him just a little, knowing that Gaara most likely didn't have a single embarrassed bone in his body.
"Then he is your boyfriend." Iruka told him. Gaara nodded, looking for all the world like on of Iruka's amazed students. His eyes sparkled for a moment before he frowned once more.
"Why does he want me to meet his parents?" Gaara asked, "He doesn't even have parents!" The look of utter confusion on Gaara's face made Iruka want to laugh. However, being the fantastic teacher that he was, he resisted the urge. This was an easy question, thankfully, for Iruka to answer.
"He wants to acknowledge your relationship, make it more permanent. He wants to admit to everyone that you are his boyfriend and that you're in love." Iruka told him, Gaara merely gazed in awe, "By introducing you to his family you are saying that the relationship is going to last, and that you should be part of his family too."
"..." Gaara's eyes were as big as saucers. He gazed at Iruka, wondering how this one chunin had learned all there was to know in the world. Maybe it was something to do with being a sensei...
"Why does my ramen taste bad?" He asked in a whisper, ready to receive all the wisdom that the mighty Browness had to offer.
"Try it now." Iruka told him.
It was delicious.
"Wow" Gaara whispered.
Iruka chuckled, no longer able to restrain himself, but was distracted from his mirth by a heavy hand on his shoulder.
"Sorry I'm late," said the masked shinobi behind him, "I had to stop and pick up flowers for my valentine and then some terrible thief stole them."
"Is that so..." Iruka said, turning around to face the shinobi with a wry smile on his lips.
"Yup." The shinobi answered, "Don't worry though, I got them back." With that the masked man pulled a dozen roses from behind his back and presented them to Iruka, his smile evident through the mask.
"Well," Iruka said, taking the roses and sniffing them daintily, "I'm sure your valentine will appreciate them greatly."
"So am I," the masked shinobi replied, "They cost an arm and a leg."
Iruka laughed and pressed a quick kiss to the edge of the mask. He turned back to Gaara, who was splitting his attention between the sappy scene and his delicious noodles. Iruka gave him a quick goodbye before standing. Gaara watched silently as they walked away together, holding hands.
As soon as he finished the ramen Gaara stood and ran towards the pond, were Lee still sat in miserable silence. Gaara arrived panting for breath, he threw himself to the ground next to Lee and looked the leaf-nin in the eyes.
"You are my boyfriend." He told Lee. Sure of himself and the information he had received from the brown god of wisdom.
"What?" Lee whispered, shocked by Gaara's sudden change of attitude.
"You are my boyfriend. That is our relationship. I want to meet your family." He said in one breath. Lee looked on, shocked, before grinning like a madman. Warm arms threw themselves around Gaara shoulders and an enthusiastic kiss found its way to his lips. Lee took his hand and pulled him off the ground, chattering all the way about things that made no sense. Gaara was dragged off to meet new people, still shocked that a few words could have this affect. Indeed, he thought to himself, the Brown was wise.
Despite Lee's insistence on finding Gai-sensei as soon as possible, they bumped into Gaara's siblings first. The two sand-nin were sitting in a tea shop, doing the paperwork that was meant for Gaara out in the open sun. Gaara pulled Lee over, hoping to welcome his love into the family the way Iruka had described.
"Temari." He said, looking his sister in the eyes, "This is Lee. He is my boyfriend.
"We met." She said with a smile at the smaller green beast of Kohona.
"That did not count." Gaara informed her.
"Ah." She replied, "Well then, it's very nice to meet you Lee, be sure to take care of my little brother."
"Hai!" Lee exclaimed.
"Are you sure..." Kankuro interrupted, "That you are in love with Gaara... I mean..."
"Very sure!" Lee said, grinning. Gaara grunted, his hand at the small of Lee's back tightened just a little.
"Well, whatever floats your boat I guess." Kankuro said, eyeing the both of him, "although that's one twisted raft right there.
Lee grinned, Gaara glared. The siblings waved goodbye as the couple continued on their search for Gai-sensei. Gaara was surprised to actually find himself looking forward to meeting Lee's infamous teacher. He had heard so much about the man. At the same time he was beginning to feel... Apprehensive. What if Lee's sensei didn't like him? Would Lee hate him too? What would happen if...
"There he is!" Lee exclaimed brightly, grabbing Gaara by the hand once more and pulling him over to where Gai was harassing two diners at a dango stand.
"Gai-sensei!" He cried, rushing towards the man with a ferocious grin.
"Lee!" Gai responded, pulling his student into an equally ferocious hug. At the table, Iruka and Kakashi relaxed just slightly, their date had just been saved thanks to the smaller green beast, once again there was peace. Or something like it.
Gaara, released from Lee's hold, approached at a slower pace. He recognized the great brown wisdom, and gave him a low and respectful bow before turning to his boyfriend.
"Gai-sensei." Lee said, almost serious for once, "I would like you to meet my boyfriend, Gaara."
Gaara suddenly found himself face to enormous eyebrow with the Green Beast himself. Gai-sensei looked him over, humming and making confusing noises that only caused the butterflies in Gaara's stomach to start up the macarena.
"Gaara hmmm?" said Gai in a dangerous voice, "What are you intentions with my student?"
"Intentions?" Gaara asked, both confused and frightened of rejection.
"Yes. What do you want with Lee?"
"I want to go throw rocks at ducks and then have pizza." Gaara told him.
There was a tense pause as Gai thought a little on the matter, looked between his besotted student and the equally besotted Gaara. He took a breath, flashed an eye at Gaara once more and declared...
"FABULOUS!" Gaara felt all the tension drain out of him like sand.
"...How did you meet?" Iruka asked from the table, hoping to distract Gai-sensei from the hug he could see coming.
"Well..." Gaara began, feeling odd about speaking in front of so many people, "I was killing ants. And then Lee hit my sand, so I turned around and saw his bulge..."
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY EVERYONE!
Woo, this story was supposed to be a one shot. What happened?