-- Disclaimer: No, I don't own Brokeback Mountain or it's characters. The song, 'Right Here Waiting' is credited to Richard Marx. --
-- Song fic mostly from Jack to Ennis. Hard to really expain without giving the whole thing away just please read and review! Thanks! --
Worth Trying Again
"You... You're leavin'... Ain't ya...?"
A soft, painful voice broke the silence that had held reign over the house for several minutes and Ennis shook his head slowly.
"I'm sorry Jack I jus'... I cain't do this no more... I cain't stand the nightmares, the looks people keep givin' me when I'm in town... I cain't do it... I'm sorry..."
Jack remained silent as he stood in the living room by the stairs facing his lover... The one it seemed he was about ready to lose. Ennis stood opposite him near the couch, he hands in his pockets and his eyes gazing downward in guiltiness.
"Well I... I cain't exactly stop ya so... If tha's wha' you wan' then I..."
He tried to continue but suddenly found he couldn't as sadness overtook him and he had to hold in a sob as he turned and raced up the stairs to their room, locking the door before collapsing on the bed next to Ennis' suitcase, all packed and ready to go. Downstairs, Ennis sighed sadly and looked around at the ranch they had built for themselves... The ranch Jack had always dreamed of... The one he'd finally agreed to live in with him and now... Now he was leaving it all. He hated having to go but in his mind he felt he had to. He went upstairs after a few minutes and knocked softly on the door to their room, hearing Jack sniffle on the other side.
"Wha'...?"
He answered after a moment of regaining himself and sat up on the bed.
"I... I need my stuff..."
Ennis responded quietly, unable to hide the sadness he felt at making the other so upset.
"Jus' a minute..."
Jack sat there for a moment, staring around the room that he and Ennis had slept together in so many nights and felt the world crashing around him all over again. Suddenly he reached over to the nightstand and grabbed a piece of paper and pen, writting quickly something that had just come to his mind as a last thing he would probably ever say to the one he loved so much. After he was done he stood slowly and went to the door, wiping his eyes before opening it to let Ennis in. The other stood there for a moment staring at him, a sadness in his eyes which he was vainly attempting to hide before Jack stepped out of the way and let him get his suitcase.
"Here Ennis... Read this after ya start drivin' a little ways..."
He said softly, slipping the folded piece of paper into Ennis' hand before turning away and bowing his head slightly.
"I'm... I'm sorry Jack..."
Ennis said quietly as he stood there, staring at his back and Jack nodded a little.
"Yeah..." He whispered. "Me too..."
A soft sigh escaped the other as he tightened his hand on the paper then walked out of the room, ignoring all protests his heart was sending raging through his body. Once downstairs, he went outside quickly and got in his truck, stopping a moment to relax before starting it up and, not daring to look back up at the ranch, back up and drove down the driveway towards the road that would lead him to the interstate. After driving for about 10 minutes down the road he pulled over and took out the piece of paper that Jack had given to him before he'd left. Now he opened it for the first time and tears began to build in his eyes as he read:
Dear Ennis,
I'm sorry cowboy, that this had to happen to us. If you really wanna leave then, like I said, I can't stop ya but at least know that I still love you and I damn well always will. Even if you decide you never love me again, or at least can never be with me because of reasons I'll probably never understand, just know I love ya with all my heart. This song's just something that came to mind as I was sitting in the room praying you wouldn't leave...
Oceans apart day after day
And I slowly go insane
I hear your voice on the line
But it doesn't stop the pain
If I see you next to never
How can we say forever
Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you
I took for granted, all the times
That I thought would last somehow
I hear the laughter, I taste the tears
But I can't get near you now
Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me goin' crazy
Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you
I wonder how we can survive
This romance
But in the end if I'm with you
I'll take the chance
Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you
Waiting for you
I love you cowboy... Please come back to me...
Always and Forever,
Jack
Ennis refolded the paper now stained with tears and placed it on the seat next to him before reving the truck back to life and turning sharply around, the tires squealing as he shot straight back towards the ranch. Barely letting the truck stop in the driveway, he jumped out and raced back in the house and up the stairs, grabbing Jack as gently as he could from where he still stood in the bedroom and hugged him tightly, crying into his hair.
"Jack... God rodeo I'm so sorry I..."
Jack shushed him quietly and hugged him back gently, looking up at him with sad blue eyes.
"Are ya stayin' cowboy...?"
He asked slowly and Ennis nodded.
"Yeah rodeo... I'm stayin'... Guess I jus' cain't bring myself ta leave ya after all, huh?"
Jack smiled a little and hugged him tightly again.
"Good... Never leave me again..."
"I won't rodeo... I won't..."
-- I know it's short but it was just a random kinda thing. Anyway, please review and tell me what you think! --