Disclaimer: I'd hardly call myself witty enough to be the creator, writer, etc. of such a fine show as GG. Which completely sucks, but I've accepted it.
A/N: It's such a burden, writing a story which holds the love of all you reviewers. –Sigh- Haha, just kidding. I lurrrrve it. Anyway, I've updated my other story, so I'm feeling particularly witty today, and that means…Drum roll! Update for you :-D.
WARNING: All spoiler virgins who want to remain totally 'pure' run fast, and don't come back until after the twenty sixth of April. All spoiler whores, junkies, and/or addicts are welcome to grab some coffee and pull up a chair for some spoiler-esque reading.
Chapter Three: Close Encounters of the Huntzberger Kind
They had, in fact, held a plethora of alcohol choices out in the pool house, smuggled by the many youths in the room. Rory had decided on a few shots of tequila, which had sufficed for the time being. The threat of being squashed on a couch with her ex and her future husband didn't seem as bad as it had just minutes ago.
"You know, I love you guys, really I do. You've been there, taken me there, and gotten me outta there." Rory stated, doing another shot.
"Where exactly is there, Ace?" Logan asked from her right, his usual smirk in place.
"Oh, you know, there! The place, with the stuff, and all the things…"
"Rory, this is hardly the place to talk about that…"
"Oh, shut up Colin, and stop being an ass." Stephanie muttered, rolling her eyes.
"I can't…its part of my charm." He said, cuffing her chin.
"Well, I could do without your charm about now, I was in the middle of a very serious, heavy drunk confession!" Rory announced from her place next to him.
"Most people would be glad to be interrupted during something possibly embarrassing like that, but no, not you Ace. Still full of surprises, I guess."
"Yes. How very Lorelai-like of me."
"You never can guess what'll happen around you two." Stephanie said.
"Oh, that's true," Colin agreed, "The two of them should be studied."
"Or at least have our own TV show!" Rory added, nodding.
"You could call it Lorelai Squared."
Finn shook his head and took a sip of his drink. "No, that doesn't fit right…It would have to be called Gilmore-"
Before Finn could finish his observations, the sub-party was crashed. A stuffy blond woman stood in the doorway, reeking of disapproval. Oh lovely. She needed more tequila before dealing with this.
"Hello Colin, Rory." Shira Huntzberger said in a polite tone, clutching her lily white purse.
"Shira, you look well." Colin said nodding to her.
"Hello Mrs. Huntzberger." Rory muttered, doing her best to keep an even tone. It was no secret among the socialites in the room that Rory and Shira had a certain animosity for each other, the reasons, however, were slightly less known.
"What are you doing back here, Mom, you know you don't enjoy this type of thing."
"I simply came to wish Colin congratulations and give Rory my best wishes, which is what I assumed you were all here to do as well."
"Well thanks, Shira. We're both glad you could come, aren't we Rory?"
"Yes. Thrilled." She was grinding her teeth now, and her fingernails had started to dig into her palms painfully. How was it possible that she had the nerve to be standing there, pretending to offer her best wishes and kind words and yet be so insufferable on the inside, probably plotting Rory's downfall where she stood?
"I'm sure the two of you will be very happy. You'll both be traveling a lot for work, won't you? What with your family's publishing locations all over, Colin, you'll need to be traveling quite a bit to check out prospective authors and such. Convenient!"
"Convenience isn't all relationships should be based on, Shira." Rory said airily. "You know, there is the small matter of feelings, and romance, and dare I say… love."
Shira's politeness remained, but her voice came out coldly. "You and I must agree to disagree on this subject, Rory. Sometimes those things aren't enough- we can't have all we want, you know."
"Well, I'd say the temperature in the room just dropped a few degrees, wouldn't you?" Finn observed, whispering to Stephanie.
"Well who's to say we couldn't if some people would just shut their big mouths and get the hell out of the way!" Rory snapped back. She'd lost it now. Her control just flew out the windows of the pool house and was drifting somewhere on the winds. Perhaps it might come back in time to save her.
"No, Finn, I'd say the temperature just went up a few notches." Stephanie whispered back. "I think we're finally going to get some juicy details as to why the distain exists between them!"
Shira herself let the controlled stance go. She couldn't have a cigarette right now, and she couldn't take anymore. "Now you listen to me, young lady, and learn when to shut your own mouth. I don't know why you're still upset over what was said at a silly dinner party four years ago, but you'd do well to let it go."
"Let it go? You and Elias practically came out and said I wasn't good enough to be dating Logan because I was goal-oriented. If it weren't for Mitchum and Honor's support, I very well may have run away from the house and the relationship screaming! Oh, wait, I did." Nope. Control had gone fishing, apparently, and unless someone duck taped her mouth shut, she wasn't going to stop anytime soon.
"Rory, this is hardly the time or place to give everyone around here a history lesson." Logan said, finally standing up and breaking into the fight. He'd been watching it from the couch like a tennis match, or a car crash- you know it's going to end badly, terribly, but you just can't look away- in a daze. Shira pursed her lips and nodded robotically before stiffly exiting the pool house, digging through her bag for a cigarette.
Rory felt a wave of gratitude toward Logan wash over her. Maybe he'd changed. He certainly seemed to care, what with the concerned looks he was giving her throughout the evening. For a moment when she'd picked up her first drink Rory had thought Logan was going to protest.
Shaking herself back to reality, Rory forced her thoughts away from Logan. After Shira had gone, Rory spoke up. "Right. I'm going to leave before I cause anymore damage." Or give into control's replacement, rage. Rage wanted her to sock Shira Huntzberger in the nose and spill wine all over her anally clean white wardrobe.
"Gilmore, you can't drive angry, you'll wind up on the side of the road, and I'll have to go to a funeral, and I'll probably cry and mourn, then my schedule will be ruined for the next few months." Paris observed from her seat on a chair. She'd been uncharacteristically quiet until now, leafing through her grandfather's golfing magazines.
"Well how did you get here?" Colin asked, concerned.
"Lane drove my car." Rory scoured the pool house. She hadn't seen Lane since she'd introduced her to Seth. There they were in the corner, seated on the floor chatting about who knows what. Lane was nursing a nearly empty drink, other bottles sat on the floor near her. She seemed a bit more giddy than usual, indicating she wasn't in a state to drive either. "Lane, come here, I think I'm ready to leave." Lane made her way over, saying her goodbyes to Seth regrettably.
"Interesting party, Rory, I'm glad I came."
"Meaning you got a date with Seth."
"Yes! He's taking me out next Saturday." Lane nearly squealed.
"That's great! But now we need to concentrate on getting home somehow..."
"Looks like we'll need to bring out the big guns. You can borrow Frank." Logan stated. "I'll even let you feed him if you want."
"No, I can't…I'll just ask Mom and Luke-"
"Just take my car; Frank would love to see you again…"
Colin nodded. "Besides, I think I saw Lorelai make an escape through a window over there. She even got Luke to shimmy down the wall."
"Luke never shimmies!"
"Which means it was a desperate situation, one so desperate she'd know her only daughter would understand if she left early."
"But what about you?" Rory protested. "How will you get home?"
"My parents are here, I'll hitch a ride."
Seeing no other logical way she could get home, and no other excuse to use, she agreed. "Fine. I'll take it, but I can't promise I'll feed Frank this time!"
"Alright, no promises then."
Rory said goodbye to Colin, pecking him softly on the lips before following Logan.
"The car's this way." Logan led Rory and Lane out to the car and into the cold night air, opening the door so they could get in.
"Thanks, Logan."
"No problem, Ace, anything for a friend." He muttered, leaning against the car door.
"Right. Anything for a friend." She said back slowly. After a beat, he shut the door and stepped away from the car. Frank turned around in his seat at the wheel and smiled.
"Miss Gilmore, nice to see you again! How are you?"
"I'm fine, how are you?"
"Can't complain, can't complain. Same house, Miss Gilmore?"
"Yes, Frank, and please hurry." Rory murmured, leaning back into her seat and shutting her eyes.
"Of course Miss Gilmore.
By the next morning, Rory's head was pounding a bit. Tequila and catfights were not to be mixed. Sitting up very slowly, as to not encourage any more pounding of the head, she wrapped her blankets around her like a cape, and crept into the kitchen.
Steaming coffee sat on the kitchen counter, in a mug with her name on it. Well, technically, it could have been her mother's mug of coffee, but it was finders keepers when it came to the stuff of life in the Gilmore-Danes house, and in this case she'd found the Holy Grail and wasn't sharing anytime soon.
Picking through the fridge's contents, she found some yogurt and grabbed a spoon before settling down at the table. Rory sighed. She just had to drink that tequila, didn't she? She could have moved from her Rory sandwich stance, which was the cause of the need for alcohol in the first place, but no. She had to put up a front for everyone, that she was as okay with dating an ex's friend as Colin and Logan seemed to be.
"Is that yogurt?" A groggy voice asked.
"Yes, you caught me Mom, I'm eating healthy."
"No, say it isn't so! My evil husband has corrupted you and turned you into a health nut! Please tell me it's at least got some sprinkles or some crushed cookies on top!"
"Nope, it has fruit, and its fat free."
"The only place fruit belongs is in pie, or other sugary pastries and assorted desserts."
"I know, I know, but I was desperate for food and Luke left for work already." Rory complained.
"Oh honey, I should have taught you better. Where did I go wrong?" Lorelai said dramatically. "I'll just grab some pop tarts and we'll be golden." She said standing up and putting some into the toaster.
"So I hear Luke shimmied last night."
"Oh yeah, it was great. I gave him a demonstration, so he could do it right, and just happened to be at the bottom to watch his own attempt." Lorelai said waggling her eyebrows.
"Just yesterday we had this conversation. Too much information, Mom! If you keep doing this to me, I'll end up in therapy and send you the bills."
"Fine, fine, fine." She muttered, placing a plate of pop tarts on the table. "So how did your evening go?"
"Well…It was fine until Logan dropped in."
"Oooh, Close Encounters of the Huntzberger Kind."
"Yes. And he sat right next to me, and on the other side was Colin, his friend, my current fiancé."
"Now we're getting closer to Days of Our Lives material."
"It gets better. Shira entered, and despite your own adventures in tequila-land I'd had a few drinks. Bye bye all sense of better judgment."
"Tell mommy what you said to the mean lady…" Rory recounted her experience, blushing at what had come from her own mouth. She couldn't believe she'd said all that in front of her friends.
"Oh sweets…You got yourself into a messy situation, and had a messy outcome. It'll get better, I'm sure. You control the guest list to the wedding; shun her by not inviting her."
"Yes, I'll turn her into a social outcast."
"An exiled loner!"
"A hermit!" Rory agreed.
"Well, before you don't send her an invitation, it might be good to start a little planning."
And plan she did. Rory was seated in the living room, a neat list a few pages long of ideas and pro/con lists. She was just about to make a new one about buying a dress versus making a dress when her cell phone rang, puppy barks erupting from it.
"My time is valuable; if this call wastes any of it I'll come after you with a pitchfork."
"Well hello to you too, Ror."
"Colin! Hey, I was just working on some wedding stuff. We've really got a lot of planning to do, according to Bridal magazine-" Rory's ramblings were cut short.
"Yeah…About that, I've got some news." His tone gave her the impression she wasn't going to like the news.
"News? I'm a fan of news. I report it, after all. Unless its bad news, because I hate bad news, everyone hates bad news. Colin, tell me this isn't bad news!"
"I-I'm not sure. I have to go away for a while, Rory. My dad says if I'm going to take off for the honeymoon and the wedding, I'll need to close a deal for him."
"Is that all? Well I don't know why you were making such a big deal of it; you're such a drama king Colin." Rory joked. "We'll have to get you a crown to go with the top hat."
"Rory…The deal's in London, and it might take a while."
"Oh. Um…How long is a while?"
"A few months. Most likely up until the wedding itself."
"Colin!"
"I know, I know, I know! It sucks. But I can't get out of it, not unless you want me to work our entire honeymoon." She was silent for a moment, he was right. She didn't want him working, and really, how could she plan this whole wedding by herself?
"Look, you're probably not that happy with me right now, but hear me out! I've got a solution. You'll need to be open though…"
"Okay."
"No, I mean very open. Wide open."
"I'm open, I'm wide open! No one has ever been as open as I am right now."
"Okay. We get a replacement."
"A replacement?"
"Yeah, someone who I trust, who you trust, who knows what I'd want willing to stand in and go try samples of wedding cake or hire a limo driver with you."
To be truthful, it wasn't a bad idea. Rory should have known he'd think of something brilliant. "Okay…Have you got someone in mind?"
"Yes. Actually, I was kind of thinking that Logan should do it."
A/N: Finally finished! Gosh, that took me forever. I hope the party scene didn't disappoint you all! Anyway, I'm going to bed, as its three thirty. Excuse my errors, I'm tired :-P.
Reviewers: Special thanks to you all, but as above mentioned, it's after three. I can't mention you all, but I'll see if I can't mention you all in the next chapter. All that said, I'm forever grateful to you all!