The Dentist: Chapter 9
"A census taker tried to quantify me once. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a big Amarone. Go back to school, little Starling." –Hannibal Lecter
Piccolo had already called a car detail shop and arranged for Iris's car to be picked up and taken care of. While they were waiting for it to arrive, they talked. Piccolo had whispered for Nail to go amuse himself for a while, which Nail did compliantly. Alone again, the two doctors had found they shared some common interests. Iris, herself, hated her car. She told him it made her feel old. Piccolo looked at his car and grinned. His Lincoln made him feel like a mobster. She had laughed when he told her this, and complimented his sense of humor. She didn't have a sarcastic sense of humor, like Lila did. Nor was she the least bit morbid. Piccolo felt as though she trusted everyone until they gave her a reason not to. He found this somewhat endearing, for unknown reasons. They talked about each other's profession. Piccolo admitted his slight displeasure at his job (though he conveniently forgot to mention his loathing for his patients and coworkers). He envied Iris in some respects. She loved her job, and looked for the best in people. She did what she did because she felt she was truly helping people. Piccolo felt guilty after that. He hadn't thought of how much his service benefited the community. He felt extremely self-centered after hearing Iris's side. Piccolo was trying to gather courage to ask her to dinner, but the fear of rejection weighed down his body like a lead ball. His chance was soon passed up as the car service pulled up.
Both adults seemed to be reluctant to leave. Iris's never-ending smile seemed to grow smaller, and her face showed signs of disappointment. The dentist believed that he was imagining this, however, and resolved to leave. Piccolo knew he was running late for his appointment, but for once, he really didn't care. Iris made him feel… He felt silly for thinking this, but he felt like a better person around her. Probably because neither had swore in their conversation, and the conversation was kept very clean. He had actually ventured out of his shell to get to know her, and had allowed her to do the same. He was certain he wasn't just drawn to her appearance, the way he had been with Lila. She held the rare quality of interest for him.
And that factor slightly frightened him.
He knew he shouldn't make her feel awkward and just leave. But he found he couldn't do that. He gathered all the courage that he had been storing over the minutes of talk, and finally poke his mind.
"Iris, do you think it would be all right if I, uh… I mean, if we talked… Again? It wouldn't have to be waiting for a car service… After work, sometime?" He almost sighed in relief after he got that out, and anxiously waited for her response.
Her smile returned to its previous brightness, reaching all the way to her friendly eyes.
"I'd be happy to, Piccolo. Even if my car doesn't need fixing." She chuckled quietly and shook his hand gently. Her own was a great contrast to Piccolo's, with a creamy look and satin-like touch. Piccolo felt himself grow slightly dizzy.
"Great, I'll give you a call sometime. Thanks again… You know…" He stopped his rambling and stepped towards his car, waving good-bye. "I'll see you later, Iris."
"I'll hold you to that." Iris grinned waving her petite hand as she went back inside. Piccolo calmly got in his car and turned the key in the ignition, trying to calm his nerves. He backed out of the parking lot and began looking for Nail. He found him sauntering down the sidewalk, talking on the phone. He rolled his eyes and pulled over.
"Hey, you coming? Or should you walk home?" Piccolo asked in annoyance. Nail hastily said a quick 'I love you' before he clicked the phone off, hopping in the car.
"WELL?" He asked loudly, grinning from ear to ear. "What happened, bro? Don't keep me in suspense."
Piccolo proceeded in explaining the topics of the conversation, and Iris in general. Nail looked knowingly at his brother, his green eyelids half closed. "How sweet."
"Shut up." Piccolo muttered, gripping the wheel tighter.
"HA ha, this is perfect. Two doctors, how precious." Nail muttered, a large grin plastered on his jovial face. "Before you know it, it'll be-" He halted his sentence to do the party boy sound with his throat.
"Would you shut UP!" Piccolo growled, tightening his grip on the steering wheel. "You and that damn kid, I swear…"
"That reminds me, she'll want to know." Nail chirped, getting out his cell phone. Piccolo's eyes widened at the thought of the kid knowing, and he attempted to get the phone from his brother.
Nail held the cell just out of Piccolo's reach, tormenting him with taunts and grins.
"Nail, I'm not kidding around! Just give me the goddamn phone!" Piccolo kept an eye on traffic as he tried to get the small device again. Nail rolled his eyes and shook his head.
"So dramatic. Fine, I won't tell her." Piccolo sighed in relief and retracted his arm, placing his hand back on the steering wheel.
"Thank you." He finally said, staring at the red traffic light before him. Presently, he heard faint touch tones of the cell and screamed in frustration.
"NAIL, DAMN YOU!"
"Well I love you too, Pic, geez." Nail said, phone up to his ear. He smiled into the phone, saying a quick hello.
"Yeah, you'll never guess what happened. You ready? Ok, I took Pic to the eye doctor, and he met this babe there, and they're already on a first name basis. He even has her phone number! …Well, you're right. I accidentally parked too close to her car… Yeah, dent the shit out of it… That's what I said! He really should thank me… I know, he's probably going to wimp out… Oh yeah? …Ok, I'll tell him. Bye." Nail hung up the phone and smiled. "She says she's very proud of you, even though the circumstances were set up for you. And she says you should talk with her again, and try to ask her out."
"And I say leave me the HELL alone." Piccolo grumbled, hunching over the wheel. "But does ANYONE give a damn about my opinion? Of course not. I'm just the friggin' entertainment."
"Aww, Piccy… Don't be like that. You know we just love you!" Nail said, slapping his brother's bald head. "And we want what's best for you. I believe that getting a special friend is a good start."
"Special friend?" Piccolo asked wryly, giving his brother the 'you're an idiot' look.
"She'd have to be special to go out with you!" Nail howled, laughing until tears came to his eyes. "I'm just playing, Pic. Geez, don't give me that look."
Piccolo arrived at his office on time for his next appointment, much to Nail's glee.
"Can I watch?" He pleaded, his eyes big and shiny.
"NO." Piccolo said firmly, closing the door of the room behind him.
"Ok, but I still have your keys!" Nail chimed through the door, making Piccolo wince.
"All right, but you have to be quiet." Piccolo lamented, opening the door again.
"I will, Pic, I will. I just wanna see what's so bad about this job."
Piccolo looked like he would say something, but changed his mind. It only encouraged his brother when he responded.
Piccolo was carefully examining the canine teeth of the teenage boy, frowning. He pulled the surgeons mask over his nose and mouth and leaned in closer, prying the boy's mouth open. Goku held many of Piccolo's tools at the ready, smiling largely at the boy. He guaranteed the young patient wouldn't feel a thing and showed him the needle filled with Novocain. Nail was watching in fascination, his eyes round and shiny.
"Wow, you sure this won't be painful?" He asked, alarming the boy. Piccolo growled at his twin and reassured the young man that he would only feel a bit of pressure, no pain. Nail scoffed loudly, making the boy squirm. Piccolo sent a glare at Nail, who smiled sheepishly and waved for Piccolo to continue. Piccolo rolled his eyes and focused on the task in front of him.
"Now I'm going to give you this numbing medication, and then some happy gas. You'll feel like you're barely awake, but I'll need you to make sure you don't bite down on anything, ok?" The teen nodded slowly as Piccolo injected the Novocain in the mouth of the patient. He gave the needle to Goku and pulled the happy gas mask onto the boy's face. The young fellow's eyes presently drooped slightly, alerting Piccolo to start. Nail scoffed again, shaking his head.
"I don't know WHAT you complain about, Piccy. This looks fun to me!" Piccolo glanced over his shoulder at his brother and scowled.
"Try doing it everyday."
The rest of the day had gone off without a hitch. Nail soon tired of Piccolo's surliness and amused himself by communicating with some of the patients. Piccolo didn't admit this, but having someone other than Goku to talk to during the waiting period was actually kind of nice. Of course he told Nail to quit bugging him and go away, but Nail knew better. When the time came go home, Piccolo found that the day had actually gone quite fast and smooth. He knew the reason, of course. The whole day, Iris's image kept swimming through his mind, making him smile slightly. He wanted to know her better, and spend time with her. For some reason or another, he just couldn't seem to shake her from his thoughts. In any case, when five o'clock rolled around, he was out the door, with Nail scrambling behind him.
"Piccolo, where's the fire, geez! I only ran two years of JV track, come on!" He exaggerated as Piccolo quickly got in his car and started the engine.
"I just want to get home, that's all." Piccolo said distractedly, looking in his rear-view mirror for signs of oncoming traffic.
"And I just want to survive the night." Nail said as his normally cautious brother sped down the streets in a flurry or lights and honks.
Piccolo pulled in the driveway very quickly, startling his neighbor Renee Hill. She was one of Lila's closest friends, and loathed Piccolo almost as much as Lila herself did.
"You nearly killed my roses, you asshole! Learn how to drive sometime, eh?" She yelled at Piccolo, who was already on his way to the door.
"I wasn't aiming for the roses, woman!" Was all he said as he reached his door, nearly keeling over when he saw Sarah grinning at him. He gasped as she hugged him tightly, cutting off his air supply.
"I KNEW you could do it! I knew it! I'm so PROUD of you, Piccolo, you old lady killer, you." When she realized Piccolo was about to pass out from lack of air she released him. "Sorry, I got excited. So, are you going to sit there catching your breath, or are you going to tell me about her?" Piccolo shook off the greeting. Nothing could damper his mood right now. Even if Lila and Bill started copulating in his yard, he'd just grin and close the blinds. He was that happy.
"Iris the eye doctor, eh? How cool! So she has reddish hair and green eyes too? You said she was small framed, too…Wow, she sounds pretty the way you describe her." Sarah's eyes were as round and shiny as new quarters as she gleefully pumped Piccolo for information. The trio had been sitting on Piccolo's couch eating sandwiches, while Nail and the girl forced every piece of memory from the poor dentist.
"Yeah, she was pretty hot." Nail cut in, his eyes half closed in a perverted looking way. "She had FINE legs that stretched to heaven, huh Piccolo? And I'd bet she has had a kid at some point, 'cause DAMN." Nail patted his heart. "Too spicy for a doctor, I'd say. Good thing you saw her first, Piccolo."
"Nail, shut up." Piccolo told his brother for the millionth time that day. "You guys are acting like I just proposed. I just think she's nice, that's all."
"Uh oh, he said nice. You know what that translates to, right Piccy-wiccy?" Nail teased, rubbing his brother's head. Piccolo slapped Nail's hand away and frowned.
"She'll probably forget me by the time she gets home tonight." Piccolo mumbled, looking at his shoes. Sarah looked at him incredulously, her mouth wide open.
"HELLO? You're friggin' green Piccolo. You're handsome too, you know? Not too many of you running around. Plus, it sounds like you didn't blow the conversation bit, so I think you have a real chance, Piccy! Besides, she said she wanted to talk again. Call her tomorrow night… No no, two nights. Don't want it to seem like you're desperate or anything. No rush, right? Ok then, plan a nice evening for a night in advance, but be flexible for two. Call really nice restaurants until you find one that has a table for two nights, and book them both. That way, she won't feel all pressured. I think you've got something good, Piccolo."
"Where should I take her?" Piccolo asked helplessly, a look of panic on his face. "What if she hates some type of food, and I choose some restaurant that only serves that?"
"Pick somewhere that serves a few types of food, stupid." Nail remarked, already looking in the phone book.
"Pick somewhere that serves seafood." Sarah chimed in, grinning at Nail.
"Yeah…" Nail said slyly, rubbing his hands together.
"What the hell are you two talking about?" Piccolo demanded, scowling heavily.
"It's well-known that some foods like shrimp are aphrodisiacs. Duh." Sarah stated matter-of-factly. "Therefor, a good place to start-"
"WOULD YOU TWO SHUT THE HELL UP!"
Two days had gone by. Two long and trying days. Piccolo now sat by the phone with Sarah and Nail hovering over his shoulder, waiting for him to call Iris. Piccolo sighed and stood up, shaking his head.
"I can't do it… She'll probably think I'm pressuring her or something." He mumbled, but was shoved back into the chair by his brother.
"Quit acting like such a tit and call her." Nail instructed, pointing at the phone. "Or we won't EVER leave you alone, right kid?"
Sarah nodded eagerly, grinning from ear to ear. "Please, Piccolo? Just try, ok? The worst POSSIBLE thing that could happen is she'll say no. If that happens, we'll begin at square one, no big deal."
Piccolo still looked reluctant, much to his twin's dismay.
"Piccolo, pick up the fucking phone already. You're acting like a little bitch." Nail said in frustration, grabbing Piccolo's hand and making it curl around the phone. "Now dial her number and ask her out." Piccolo gulped and nodded, slightly alarmed at his brother's change of mood. He dialed her number, but hung up after one ring.
"I guess she's not home." He said, trying to look convincing.
"Bullshit, move over." Nail shoved his brother out of the way and pushed the re-dial button, sending Piccolo into a frenzy.
"Nail, NO!" He yelled, but it was too late. The phone rang about three times before a feminine voice picked up.
"Hello?"
Piccolo grabbed the phone and cleared his voice, hoping he didn't sound too nervous. "Uh, Iris?" He asked timidly, hoping he had gotten the wrong house.
"Actually, I'm her sister. Let me get her really quick. Can I ask who's calling?" The voice resembled Iris's voice, though it lacked her warmth.
"Piccolo." He said as nicely as he could, hoping he didn't sound too strained.
"Huh, interesting. Hey I, 'Piccolo' is on the phone!" She called the last part to her sister, who picked up a moment later.
"Hi Piccolo, how are you?" Iris greeted brightly, making Piccolo feel a little more at ease. He wanted to say he felt better now, but knew that would sound stupid.
"I'm good, how about you?" He noticed with extreme agitation that his brother and Sarah were hanging on every word.
"Ugh, long day. But it's getting better!" She said optimistically, making Piccolo brace himself.
"Uh, Iris? I was wondering if maybe you'd like to join me for dinner tomorrow night? If you can't, I'd completely-"
"Don't be ridiculous, Piccolo! I'd love to. Just name the time and place, and I'll be there!" She said cheerfully, making Piccolo almost gasp at his luck.
"The Luna Azure at eight?" He asked timidly, and was relieved to hear her say yes. "Thanks, Iris. I look forward to seeing you there."
"Me too, Piccolo. Have a nice night!" She said warmly, leaving Piccolo smiling.
"Ok, you too." He hung up and gasped as Nail and Sarah pounced on him.
"YOU DID IT, FINALLY!" Nail exclaimed, slapping Piccolo's face playfully. "I knew you had it in you deep, deep, deep, deep-"
"Thank you, Nail." Piccolo cut him off dryly.
"…Deep down." Nail finished, grinning.
"Now we have to pick out something for you to wear, Piccy." Sarah cheered, pulling his arm as Nail lead the way into Piccolo's bedroom. "A nice suit can get you lucky, you know."