Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. I can't think of good disclaimers today. Sorry
Chapter 13: The Return of the Fellowship of the Two Redhead Twins
(A/N: Sorry, LOTR moment. Also, little notice: I am writing this during break, and it will be posted in a few days.)
Umbridge was getting worse and worse. She hardly taught. Ah, no, correct me; she didn't even teach. She sat and watched her classes read through their incredibly boring texts and issued awful detentions, for no particular reason. Dumbledore was often away and still couldn't stop her, not knowing much of these doings. Not that anyone really complained; if Umbridge heard of a complaint of the students' to one or more of the teachers, another detention would be issued to said snitch.
Harry, Hermione, and Ron noticed that several of the students (including Slytherins) had red and inflamed hands.
After a month, they took matters into their own hands.
Hermione was furious. "How could Dumbledore do this?"
"He doesn't know, Hermione. Leave off a bit," answered Harry.
Hermione wouldn't back down so easily. "But this cannot be happening! It's crucial that we learn to properly defend ourselves especially at this time! We've got to do more than the DA!"
True, the DA was doing well and meeting regularly, but there was only so much that Harry could teach them all.
Ginny passed by. "I've got an idea."
Ron looked perplexed. "You're younger than us. What'll you do?"
"FYI, Ronald, you seem to be forgetting about the Twins."
"Fred and George?"
Ginny rolled her eyes. "No. Of course not. Not at all."
"Shut it."
"We could write to them! I'm sure they'd do something!"
Harry was a bit skeptical. "Erm, what are we saying here, Ginny? Hm? What'll they do? Do we really want to get into that situation? Remember the nifflers? Remember the Quidditch match that day?"
"Yeah, but Fred and George are too good to get caught. Plus, they're not students."
"True, but still…"
"But nothing. I'm going to write to them." And she flounced away.
"Crazy girl," Ron muttered.
The next week, the Twins arrived at Hogwarts, coming through Hogsmeade.
Sneaking into the school with the aid of their Decoy Detonators (they'd scared everyone in the Great Hall by dropping several and ran by amidst the screams and commotion), they found Gryffindor Tower and Ginny.
Ginny was probably Fred's and George's favourite sibling and they both Umbridge, so they were only too glad to do as Ginny had asked: cause enough mayhem to drive Umbridge crazy, or send her away for a while.
Draco's whole Chamber of Secrets thing had worked…for about eighteen hours. Not enough.
Fred and George had some better ideas.
So when dangerous fire-crabs ended up in Umbridge's desk, you can imagine how they got there.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!"
Fred and George snickered. They'd brought their fireworks and various other objects of destruction.
The next day (Fred and George had rooms in the Three Broomsticks' inn for a while), the twins set up a full-castle ambush for Umbridge. This would be funny, but incredibly disastrous (eventually, stop rushing me).
As Umbridge walked down the hall, George ran over to Ginny, giving her a signal. "She's coming!"
Right on cue, Ginny set off one of Fred's Decoy Detonators. Umbridge yelled and ran in the other direction…where one of George's "Funny Death Friends" (fake ghosts of past wizard murderers) was waiting. Immediately, Bloody Jack the Ripping Ghoul zoomed out at Umbridge, yelling a mixture of profanity and death threats.
"Rest in pieces, thou foul fiend!"
"ARGH!"
Harry and Ron laughed, waiting for Umbridge to turn the corner…
As she came running at full speed, for her, which was not very fast, Ron set off one of George's great golden dragons while Harry lit a lethal looking cannon.
You can obviously tell that there was a good deal of laughter, snickering, rushing, running, screaming, yelling, tripping, injuring, and swearing.
After being doused by a Hexed Hose (Draco was waiting with that), slipping into a Portable Swamp (and coming back looking rather green and brown), getting lost in a Mysterious Mist (Umbridge walked around for an hour in there, looking confused, for when caught in the mist, everything seemed to look like a huge set of funhouse mirrors), and seeing a Boggart that Ginny managed to procure during a quick raid of the Teachers' Lounge (it turned into a vicious looking centaur with a quiver of sharp arrows), Umbridge was tired and angry. Things got a little out of hand after five hours of pranks on a Sunday afternoon.
You can't quite hide an all-castle-prank-down that has been going on for five hours, even in such a large school as Hogwarts. The teachers and students are bound to notice something, am I correct, reader? Well, not only do the teachers notice, but the ghosts do as well. This statement allows us to proceed to a simple lesson that will continue our story.
When you are carrying out an all-castle-prank-down, the following will cause and affect different occurrences.
If Firenze is in on your joke, he may gallop out at top speed, chasing Umbridge down seven corridors, before becoming tired. Umbridge will scream and run. However, Professor Flitwick may be ambling along the corner, thus colliding painfully with Umbridge. Flitwick will have to go to the Hospital Wing with a broken nose. Next, Peeves, who thinks Umbridge is playing some weird game, will decide to throw a strange assortment of objects at her, including a set of quills, a student's hat, the chandelier from the Great Hall and Mrs. Norris.
You can imagine, reader, what Umbridge's reaction will be—screaming and running (as she has been doing for the entire afternoon). As she is screaming and running, she may scream and run right into Professor Snape, who is carrying jars of pickled rat brains and is not at all pleased to have broken them upon collision with said fat teacher and having spilled pickled rat brains all over his black robes. He will begin to swear so loudly, that Peeves runs away.
Upon finding you and the mischief-makers, Snape will be quite angry with you and take you all into his office, give you a stern, sarcastic, rather rude lecture (with Umbridge looking angry at his side), give you detention (washing his soiled robes), and taking off fifty points from your unfortunate house: Gryffindor. But, luckily for you, Professor McGonagall will be outside the office, reward each of you with fifty points, and give you a rare smile.
Your accomplices, the Weasley Twins, will be sent back to Hogsmeade and will be given strict orders not to reenter Hogwarts with such a purpose again.
So, all in all, you will have had a very triumphant day.
Harry, Ginny, Hermione, and Ron walked back to Gryffindor Tower, laughing as Peeves shoved a startled Filch into a suit of armour. That had been a great day.
A/N: I'm wrapping up in the next chapter. And I'll start a new story. I had the idea of Voldemort coming into the story, but I could never really fit him in. And, just so y'all know, I may do most of my story in summer, because of the desires of the parental unit, so I commence on the next chapter in a bit…then, au revoir till summer! Ah, oui, merci to all the readers who aiment No Magic Allowed et Le Return de Cruella. J'aime tous les jeunes, qui les aiment, et pour les jeunes qui les n'aiment pas, c'est ok. Thanks, y'all.