Title: Right Before Your Eyes 9?
Author: Wereleopard
Rating: PG
Pairing: C/A
Email: Angst
Summary: Up to pregnant Darla it is AU, Angel's thoughts and questions about himself, his friends, his redemption and the love he has for Cordy.
Disclaimer: The characters in the Angel verse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made I am just poor and the song doesn't belong to me either.
Distribution: FSB!
Feedback: Yes please!

A/N Ok this is AU duh! LOL. So instead of Spike making Buffy feel something it was Angel, but Spike IS still in love with her and we know whom Angel wants.

Chapter 9 Lobby, Hyperion Hotel, LA

Lindsey cradled his jaw he knew that he was going to have a hell of a bruise but he was lucky that she didn't use all her strength not that it mattered even she did and he knew that she would he still would have stood up to her to protect Cordy. She was his only real friend in this world and they were going to have a child together. They would never love each other in a romantic way but he was going to be there for her. The first steps on making her life easier would be at least trying to make friends with her family.

Some of them had seen what he had done and how many times he had tried to kill them off. He hated this but he was the one who was going to have to make the first move. With his hand still against his jaw he looked at them in the eyes.

"What do you think we should do?" He asked.

"About what?" Gunn asked suspiciously.

"About the little blonde with the attitude who seems to want Angel. Now I know we've had our differences and I've tried to have you killed or tortured but I have changed a lot of it has to do with that young woman laying upstairs. There's just something about her and of course that brutal honesty that keeps banging at any of your walls like a sledgehammer until they finally give in. I want her to be happy and that is here with Angel she loves him and you guys." Lindsey stopped for a moment taking a deep breath. "I will do anything to make sure that she is happy and I will do what I have to. I am not going to let little Miss Slayer ruin that."

Gunn nodded at him, his eyes defrosting a little. "It'll take time for us to trust you if we ever do but we managed to forgive Angel for all the shit he has done to us so well I'll give you a go."

Wes nodded in agreement, Lindsey turned around looking for Fred but she seemed to have vanished and then something delicate touched his hand turning he stared at the petite Texan and she smiled sweetly at him and held a tube in her hand. Lindsey looked at her dubiously not sure what was in it.

"Don't worry this is an ointment that will help keep the bruising to a minimum and help it heal quicker." She held out her hand. "Trust me?"

Lindsey froze for just a second he was not use to this there were not that many people he did trust well there was one. He reached out and took hold of her small hand and let her lead him to the sofa.

Once he was seated Fred stood in between his legs and placed one hand under his chin and tilted it and gently with her free hand she rubbed the ointment in as gently as she could she didn't want it to hurt any more that it already was.

Lindsey closed his eyes and sunk into that gentle touch it was nice to feel cared about apart from Cordy no one had done that in such a long time if ever. He knew Darla never loved him and now he wasn't sure if he had ever loved her, he had obsessed over her yes but love he no longer was sure. All she ever wanted apart from inflicting pain was Angelus and if she had to she would even settle for Angel, he sighed and breathed deeply he was sorry that she was dead again but maybe after sacrificing her life for her unborn child that she would finally get some peace. Everyone deserved that at sometime in their lives.

"Lindsey?" Said a soft Texan twang.

Lindsey opened his eyes are realised that she had stopped but he was still leaning into her touch he moved away abruptly. "Uhh sorry about that." He mumbled.

He was so different now, he got so tired of fighting all the time but he was lucky enough to wander into a small town full of generous people but he was still closed off and then she came into his life Cordelia Chase the seer to his then nemesis at first they argued, then they talked and then they became friends he didn't know how she did it but he was guessing Angel had felt like him at some point waking up and that a certain honest brunette had wormed her way past all the barriers they had put up as if they were smoke and once she was there you didn't want her to leave, you weren't sure that you would live without her in your life. The only difference between the two of them was that Angel was hopelessly in love with her, he loved her but now as a sister it become more like that after the night they spent together.

"That's ok." Fred told him with a smile her face flushed red as those blue eyes stared at her with interest taking it what he could about her, she knew it was because they had never met and he wasn't sure about her. "We haven't really met I'm Winifred Burkle but everyone calls me Fred it's nice to meet you Lindsey." She held out her hand.

Lindsey smiled back at her a full open and honest smile she was very sweet he took hold of her hand and just held it for a minute and they just stared at each other and suddenly they both realised what they were doing and dropped their hands and stepped back.

"So about Buffy?" Lindsey said turning to the others.

Angel's Room, Hyperion Hotel, LA

Angel couldn't sleep, who was he kidding he didn't want to sleep he was afraid that when he awoke that this was a dream and he would be alone again, only half a life not knowing where the best of his was but he also just loved to watch, to see the small movements and sounds made as she slept, the way she was curled against him full of trust.

He stared at her face for just a moment longer and then his gaze roamed the rest of her body until it landed on her swollen stomach. Angel reached out and laid a hand on it again and he felt it kick and the vampire couldn't help it he smiled what he didn't notice was a pair of large hazel eyes open and stare at him and watched with amusement that a child, one that was not his gave him such joy when it kicked.

"Having fun?" She whispered.

Angel's eyes whipped around to hers. "I didn't wake you did I?"

"No you didn't. Angel we really have to talk we have a lot to get through there is a lot of emotional baggage. If we are going to be together we need to sort through it." Cordy told him her eyes full of fear afraid that he was going to change his mind.

"Ok I'll do anything I have to if it means that we can be together." The vampire said with a smile.

"Me too." Cordy whispered back and as they continued to stare at each other they leaned in and gently kissed each other it was gentle and loving just how it should be.

They both pulled back with identical goofy grins on their faces.

"So about Buffy?" The brunette asked.

Angel settled and pulled her more tightly against him.

"You know I had never been so sorry. When you learnt about me and Darla and I saw your face I was ready to stake myself and as the days went by and you never came I thought I had lost you. Wes thought it was a good idea for Buffy to visit to see if she could snap me out of it but she was just as lost as I was and we reached for each other just in comfort and that is when you arrived I threw her off my grabbed a sheet and ran after you but you ran out into the daylight and I couldn't follow by the time I could you were gone and I had no idea where and each phone call I missed when you had a vision it killed me, I couldn't be there to hold you when you had one and then the jealousy hit who was holding you? Who were you spending time with? These thoughts were running around in my head and there was no way for me to find out the truth and then the months passed and nothing diminished I still missed you as much as I did the first day." Angel opened himself up to her completely.

"Thank you Angel I forgave you a long time ago, I hope you have forgiven me too. So why is Buffy still here then?" Cordy asked him before he could say anything else her hormones were all over the place and she was already on the verge of bursting into tears.

Angel groaned. "Well after you left she gave me a kiss and went back to Sunnydale and something must have happened because all she kept doing was either phoning or just arriving on the doorstep, the first time she went to sleep she headed to my room but we managed to stop that and it was just getting worse and then of course having a pregnant Darla here that was so much fun." He added sarcastically.

"Angel can we get through this, I mean all of this." Cordy asked him honestly.

"We can get through anything as long as we are together and I'm not going to lose you. I thought I did before but never again. I can't be without you." Angel told her earnestly.

Somewhere in LA

Buffy wandered the streets not knowing what to do next, she came here to be with Angel but nothing was working out as planned. She stopped as something bit into her neck, reaching up and pulled a dart out from her neck and the ground came up to meet her.

TBC