"After all the trouble you go to, you get about as much actual "food" out of eating an artichoke as you would from licking 30 or 40 postage stamps. "

--Miss Piggy

The Princess and The Earthling.

I.

Ron stretched his arms above his head as he yawned mightily. Ron's hand lazily scratched his stomach as he padded down the steps of his grandfather's home. Running a hand through his wild blond hair he paused to look out the nearby window. He had to wince at the path of destruction clearly shown in the distance.

He had managed to piece together what had happen shortly after he had blanked out. Apparently stones aren't the only things that are able to skip and apparently round spherical ships were ideal for it. A quick glance at the news could quickly give the average passerby a quick understanding of the path the ship had taken. First the rather messed up bridge of the nearby bay where they had touched down was an easy indicator of where their journey had begun. A few impacts across Japan showed where the ships progress had continued afterwards and the crater in the side of the mountain indicated where it had stopped.

The thing that got Ron though was what had happen next. Neither the young princess nor his grandfather had been very forth coming on details. The older red head last he checked had locked herself in her room not willing to come out and the crazy green skinned woman was lost out to sea. He'd pity the fishes if he wasn't sure she'd somehow come back. He was a student of horror movies after all and all of them indicated that the monster always returned. Maybe he'd finally be able to join the NRA by that time and get whatever crazy gun they'd be willing to send him. Did Japan even have a NRA branch?

Well that aside he had figured out a few events that must have happened while he was still blanked out. Someone, more then likely his grandfather, had managed to drag him out of the ship along with the two princesses and deposit them in his grandfather's house. Some time before he did wake up the next day his father was freed from whatever crazy place the one Princess had locked him up in and with all of this going on apparently the military never came around. Sure Japan might only have a self defense force but he had frankly expected better. He'd make sure to write to whatever local form of government this crazy country had.

Finally done with his mid-morning reflection on past events he made the rest of the way down the stairs. Sniffing the air he picked up the scent of something pleasant cooking and made his way to the kitchen. Stopping at the entrance he allowed a smile to come to his face watching as the red headed woman in front of him and her younger sister busied themselves with cooking the breakfast. Having a princess cook for you must be a treat after all.

"Glad to see you're..." He was startled out of his greeting when the oven door flew right by him and promptly embedded itself in the wall. Startled the younger girl dropped the greasy frying pan in front of her on the floor before following right after when she slipped.

"Joss!" The red head turned from her work bending down quickly towards her sister. It was at this time that whatever was in the pot decided to attack.

'Attack?' Well that was the best way to describe the greenish brown blob hostile nature towards him as it rose from its pot. The growl did little to comfort him either as it slowly oozed down.

"Um..." Ron took a quick step back ready to run when the blob with lightening fast speed shot out at him. Neither princesses seemed to notice the threat and Ron wasn't sure what to do himself. After all how often did food attack?

To his surprise a green blast flew past his head and struck the blob as it approached. To his additional surprise he apparently had a very high scream which seemed to draw the attention of all those gathered. Clearing his throat he gave a small wave to the two in front of him and the green one floating through the wall to his side. "Ladies no need for concern. The Ron man is just testing out his screams of courage. That is all for now."

The women gathered just continued to stare in his direction as the silence grew more and more awkward. Finally Shego cleared her throat and turned back towards the princesses. "Well can't expect them to be all perfect. Now Kimmie care to tell me what you're up to?"

This taunt easily brought the red haired girl attention back towards Shego and probably would have been meet with some crack about weight if the microwave hadn't started to glow. Not the normal type of glow mind you but a deep orange one that seemed to radiate out and fade as it left. The device itself started to crackle in a strange way and would occasional beep as if it was trying to communicate something. Shego with a frown pointed at it and looked at Ron. "Does it usually do that?"

"Um...it's a first last I checked."

II.

Ron sighed as he placed the plate in front of him. Sitting down he watched as the amber liquid slowly oozed over the flaky brown surface of the pancakes below. Slowly bringing his fork towards it he allowed the utensil to dig in and separate a piece out. Raising it towards his mouth he placed the still warm food inside and allowed himself a chance to explore the taste. 'Damn good if I do say so myself.'

That first bite done he started to dig into the meal looking up occasional at the other occupants. The two princesses were carefully examining the food attempting to probably determine what it was while Shego sat there taking bites in between reading some magazine. "It's not poison you know." This brought the two hesitant girls to look in his direction.

"What is it though?" The red head adjusted her hair as she stared back at him.

"Pancakes. It's good honest." The food identified now the two girls seemed more willing to try it. Reaching out, they both took a careful bite and sat there letting the taste hit them. With a smile they soon began digging in themselves. "Glad you liked it Princess Possible was it?"

"Just call me Kim."

"Well isn't that a little rude. I mean you are a princess after all."

"Well do you want me to walk around calling you Lord Stoppable because I will if I have to." Smiling Ron nodded his head in Kim direction who took that as a good sign. Ron felt pride seeing a princess enjoy his cooking so much when she again started to dig into it.

"Alright well now that we are here I'd like to make a few ground rules. First off no cooking you two."

Joss frowned in the direction of her sister. "It was all Kim idea you know. I said we wouldn't be able to get this stuff to work."

"I was just trying to be polite! After all I don't want to free load." A snort from Shego drew a venomous stare from Kim. Ron couldn't help but suspect they'd probably try to kill each other as soon as he was gone.

"So kid what other rules you got?"

Ron frowned as he raised his hand to scratch his head. "Actually that's all I got right now. I'll get back to you on that." Looking down at his wrist he cursed mentally. "Got to go!" With an almost inhuman speed he gulped down the remaining food on his dish and was up and running.

Remembering the threat that his grandfather had issue earlier he made quick time to his belongings as he made his way out of the house. He'd be damned if he was going to take his grandfather up on his offer to 'help' him get over his tardiness. The last time involved trying to reroute a river with a spoon. The sad fact was he'd actually managed it by the end.

He was only a few feet down the path when a pink object came sailing out of the nearby bushes. Too startled to scream Ron fell back on his back preparing for the worse. What he saw was an odd little naked rodent staring at him with its hand on its hips. Blinking Ron stared back into those dark eyes and could have sworn the thing squeaked a hello at him.

"There you are 'More Powerful then all of Jurai and the Galaxy Police Ships Combined' I was wondering where you got off to." Ron looked back as Shego drifted through the wall smiling at the rodent. He'd probably never get used to that but the rodent seemed happy.

"Um...yours?"

"Yep!" Smiling Shego held out her hand as the rodent crawled up it.

Ron frowned as he looked at it and decided to deal with it at a later time and date. "Well got to go." With that he was running down the path again intent on making it to his grandfather latest training session on time. This of course meant a half hour early.

III.

Kim sighed as she made her way up the stairs. It was a confusing world she was in currently with its backward ways and primitive technology. The fact that these people had yet to master the concept of moving sidewalks astounded her. You'd think that would be a priority to discover but apparently they preferred running around doing whatever earthlings do.

Still despite all that it was a pleasant area. The fresh smell of the forest reminded her of Jurai's mighty trees and the gentle swaying of the wind served to calm her nerves. It was really a relief over the usual things a princess had to do. Except for that failure of an attempt to capture that monster Shego she hadn't had a vacation in the last few years. Always a state diner that required the crowned princess to shown up or God forbid the delegates present would be offended. She hated delegates.

Clutching the bag in her hand she reminded herself of her intention of being out here. The earthling, know as Ron, had been kind enough to allow them a place to stay while they waited for rescue and she was intent on at least being a help. It irked her though that she had to depend on Shego to cook the meal she was currently carrying. Who knew a monster could cook better then a princess and of course said monster relished in rubbing that in. It didn't help that she had received a lecture from that pink rodent Shego was now carrying around with her when she had tried to help a little.

"Ron you lack focus!" Kim blinked when she heard a male voice she did not recognize. Walking faster she could hear a loud noise quickly followed by another. Worried for the kind young man who had granted her a place to stay she broke into a run her feet moving swiftly over the stone walkway. Bursting from the trees she sighed in relief at what she saw.

Before her was a simple dirt covered arena whose most noticeable feature was the series of wooden pegs driven into the soil. Standing on those pegs was an old man whose pepper gray hair hand tied back in a short pony tail and wearing a simple traditional robe. In his hands he held firmly a wooden practice sword and the way he swung it at his apparent student showed that he knew how to use it. Ron on the other hand looked worse for wear with his blond hair matted down with sweat and his white tee shirt clinging to his chest. Kim noted with a mild bit of interest that Ron was apparently more muscled then he had first appeared to be. At the moment those muscles were getting a work out.

Smiling to herself Kim leaned back watching as the older man again pressed the younger one with a series of attacks. She suppressed a giggle when Ron trying to block a mid section blow stumbled backwards only to have the older man whack him on the foot. A simple 'watch your surroundings' followed before the fighting continued. Kim was pleased to note her initial suspicion that Ron appeared to be a more competent fighter then most was coming to be proven correct. She wondered how he handled himself in unarmed combat.

"Well it seems we have an audience now. Shouldn't you greet our guest?" The older man stepped back pointing his sword towards Kim. When Ron looked behind him she gave a little wave.

It was at this moment that the older man struck again whacking him on the head and finally sending him sprawling to the ground. "Careless!"

"Grandpa that was unfair you tricked me!" Kim hid the smile as Ron tried to straighten himself up.

"In battle my Grandson you must always be ready. Never allow one's enemy to dictate where your attention should be and never take one's eyes off the current threat. Even to look at a pretty lady." This brought a blush to Kim cheeks as the older man lightly stepped off.

"I see your Grandson didn't inherit any of your charm Mr...?" Ron grumbled at the comment as he deposited his blade against the tree.

Ignoring her question the older man turned back to his grandson. "Did you finish your math homework?"

"No Grandpa I already told you the school got blown up. I don't have any homework."

"Your book is still intact is it not? Study ahead and while we are on the subject make sure to keep up with your history and language courses."

Kim watched as Ron stopped staring back in shock. "You want me to teach myself Trig?"

"I don't see the difficulty in it. I'll give you a test later on the subject when we next train."

"So now I have to solve equations and fight with a sword at the same time." Kim frowned at the whining note in the younger ones voice but nodded with satisfaction when the elder gave him a blistering stare. "Alright I'll get on it."

"Excellent, now why don't you escort the young lady back home." With that the older man left. Kim turned towards the young blond boy who was currently wiping himself off with a towel. He wasn't bad looking when you look at him right and the ears were kind of cute.

"I bet you think that's funny?"

Smiling Kim shook her head and held up the bag. "I brought you your lunch. I figure you'd be hungry and it was the least I could do."

Staring at it with obvious distrust Ron slowly took it. "Um...care to tell me who cook it?"

"Shego did. I was surprise to learn she actually had skills beyond blowing stuff up."

"That's a relief." Kim fixed him with a withering stare on that one. She could cook after all it was just difficult when the tools refused to work with her. It was the same problem back home.

Sitting down Ron dug into his meal with abandon. Watching with fascination Kim was left speechless as the blond headed boy literally inhaled the stuff. It was kind of a scary sight.

IV.

Kim gently kicked the rock in front of her as she walked alongside Ron. Lunch had been interesting as she listened to him explain all about the strange customs of those who lived on this world. His own personally experiences though had drawn most of her attention. They weren't the most thrilling stuff, mostly about his pursuit of education and killing something called a zombie, but the way he told it managed to draw her in. She had never seen anyone who could become so easily excited about such simple things.

Looking over she could see him holding some sort of book. It had a picture on the front cover with some sort of robot apparently fighting another robot. Both robots held glowing swords and the image background appeared to be some sort of large metal structure in space. Frowning she looked up at the title 'Of Naked Mole Rats and Gundams'. Not a story she was familiar with but he seemed to be into it. "Good book?"

"Nah! The author is slow to release and a little too high and mighty. Besides it's not very realistic. For one thing the battle tactics are all wrong and the characters just come off bad." Kim noted the fact that the sky started to darken. Shrugging she looked back at Ron continuing to listen to him. "To sum it up it had potential but the author was too much of a jerk to carry it off. It was a big waste of money in the end." It was at this point that loud thunder boom sounded.

Ron frowned as he glared up at the sky. "Great looks like it's going to rain now." Kim almost laughed when right after his statement the downpour started. Within seconds they were both drenched.

Staring up at the rain falling down on her Kim shivered slightly. "Is there any place where we can take shelter out of the rain?"

"Well there's a shack up head." Kim looked forward eager to get somewhere dry. "Or at least there was. It got blown up during the way."

Shooting Ron an annoyed look she pulled her hood over her head trying to at least keep her self somewhat warm. "Alright is there any place that is still standing?"

"Not really."

Kim sighed as she prepared herself for the long wet walk back home. "Well I guess we're going to get wet."

To be Continued...

A/N: Well this took a couple of weeks to finish with me working on it off and on. Anyway due to 'things' coming up the Gundam chapter won't be out till next week. For those loyal fans though I include a sneak preview.

Preview:

The older mechanic shrugged and leaned back against the wall behind him. "Pretty much. Sweet ass though."

Turning around Danny watched as she disappeared around a corner. "That is the truth."

End of Preview

Makes you wonder what Surforst is writing doesn't it. By the way Danny is a new character so don't worry if you don't recognize him. Not an important guy just more fodder for the war.

Anyway back to this story. You'll notice I 'killed' the shack sign that I'm sure you were all expecting. Didn't feel like having it and it just doesn't fit for the KP characters anyway. Next chapter we get to see Monique and Kim gets some new attire. Basically it's a filler chapter which should be fun. Oh and more appearance by our favorite little rodent.

Anyway as always keep on reading and reviewing. Those who leave a signed, I stress the signed part mind you, review will get a personal reply. If you aren't registered go ahead it doesn't cost you a dime after all and you get to pick my brain while you're at. As for grammar errors in this chapter there's plenty but until I get a beta there just going to be there. If you would like to volunteer just send me a PM and we'll talk. It's an easy job after all Mr.Dr.P might update every week but I just don't have that much energy. Well enjoy.

Disclaimer: I don't own KP and I don't own Tenchi. Check out both and spend that hard earned cash. After all that's how capitalism works.