To Make Me Whole
A Petshop of Horrors fanfiction
Disclaimer: No, I don't own Petshop of Horrors. But read this anyways. I DO own Chitose, and Yoshihiro though. So yeah…don't steal them. Read and review!
I am the only one of my kind. I live in my loneliness-
With only the memories of the dead to haunt me.
Innocence is but a sham.
Love is nothing but an illusion.
I am alone.
The room was silent except for the rustle of silk. A slim young woman, her head bowed demurely, stood alone in the center of the polished room, clothed only in a long, white robe and ankle socks. Subdued by the lush attention already lavished on her, she stood elegant and motionless. A short, stout woman approached her, thick layers of rich fabric folded over her arm.
"Lovely," she murmured, raising a weathered hand to gently caress the silky ebony twists and turns of the young woman's hair, held up by lacquered redwood hairpins. Careful not to make the pins fall out, she dipped her head lightly with a shy smile. The old woman continued to rush about, laying out he kimono components carefully and meticulously. She closed her eyes slowly, a gesture any onlooker would not be able to draw themselves away from.
How had this happened? She breathed in, the sharp cedar scent of the hardwood floors overwhelming her, yet comforting her. How had her father been able to simply give her heart away, when she, herself, knew not what resided in its depths? It seemed cruel and unreasonable in this day and age. Her mind, she realized, was trying to memorize the scents, sounds, and feelings of this place, which it had been doing a lot of quite recently. Anything to hold onto the life she barely had left.
She opened her eyes slowly, her lush eyelashes part for her vision, much to the content of the attendant. She extended her right arm with a liquid-like movement, allowing the cool silk to slide over her arm. As the old woman buzzed around her, she lifted her other arm just as gracefully. The sleeve of this arm was drawn onto her shoulder. With her arms arched behind her as a woman ready to plunge into the sea from their perch on a cliff, she left the woman wrap the rich crimson fabric around her body and to adjust the plain white collar of her simple robe underneath. The woman hiked the slippery, crimson cloth so that the edges just barely kissed her ankles with movement. She then wound a stiff belt around her slim waist, tying it tightly. Then the attendant stepped back, checking that the garment hung evenly.
The young woman realized, unsurprised, that through all this the woman had never touched her. Not really. The old woman had been careful to not have any contact with her skin. As a last touch, she wrapped a small, golden, silk rope around her waist. On its end dangled a charm, a small phoenix, its wings outstretched in suspended flight, forever frozen. And her old face crinkled in an approving smile.
"You're ready for your future husband, Miss Chitose. How lucky you are, only 19, and already your father has produced a high-standing man to wed you!" the woman praised, tugging at the delicate and lavish silk every so often so as to adjust trivial things. Chitose bowed her head slightly, a well practiced shy smile on her face.
"Yes…I truly am blessed to have such a fine father and a fine man to marry…" she answered softly, almost as if trying to convince herself of these words. But her demeanor, nor her puzzled, ever questioning eyes conveyed the doubt she held in her words. Nothing, it seemed, would calm the raging ocean of her heart, so confused and hurt, and seeking.
Picking her head up from its previous, hollow inspection of the wood floor beneath her, Chitose took a breath and calmly slid open the rice paper door. While she padded wordlessly down the manor's hallways, she thought it odd that her father, a Japanese businessman, would marry her to a Chinese man. She still remembered the warning he'd always given her in her youth.
Chitose's father, Yoshihiro Nakanishi, knelt down to meet his young daughters gaze, a worried expression on his face.
"Chitose my pet, you must never go near any man from China, do you understand? Promise me you won't for if you do, your Otoo-chan's heart would break," he instructed, his deep brown eyes intense, and his face made more ominous by his tousled, ebony hair shadowing his face. Chitose, eager for every chance to please him, furiously nodded her head in confirmation.
"Okay, Otoo-chan! But why not? It seems silly…" she questioned innocently, as only children can. Worry and anger flashed across his imposing features, and his strong, calloused hands took hold of her shoulders roughly.
"Because they are dangerous to your very existence, my dearest! Their kind is not to be mixed with ours. Remember, koibito, you are to defend every human on earth. Therefore, you are even more precious than you even know," he explained his deep eyes pained, and his features suddenly seeming to age. Chitose could only nod silently, and shiver in fear of these men her father spoke of. In that moment, as she stood shaking in her father's protective embrace, her innocence was lost. Her path set.
Suddenly, she felt herself falling, and her mind returned to the moment she was living. Her eyes closed tight, anticipating the harsh welcome of the wood floor to her body, but only felt the gentle, yet strong arms of a man. As she tentatively opened her eyes, her gaze met with one that consisted of an icy blue gaze on the left, and a mysteriously enthralling golden stare on the right. His hair was so fine, Chitose suspected it to be as soft as feathers, softer even. It was that of a deep, pure ebony, and it fell over his right eye, concealing it somewhat. She found herself tracing the edge of his hair with her eyes, and realized it was cut only to about his chin, leading her to drink in his features. Following the flow of his chin to his lips, Chitose noticed how subdued they were, yet they had a dignified look about them. They were muted red in color, and she had to control the urge to press a finger to them to see if her suspicions of the soft bliss they concealed were true. His skin, though not ghostly pale nor completely white, reminded her of porcelain, or perhaps alabaster. In his complexion, not a solitary flaw was present. He was beyond all words of beauty. Ethereal, noble, handsome, exotic, majestic…he was all these words and more.
She suppressed a blush, and gracefully got up, his arms helping to support her. Standing upright, finally she could see his lithe form, over which was a crimson Chinese garb that was obviously made to match her own clothes. The only thing that pierced the crimson brocade was a golden dragon stitched along the side, wrapping around in liquid movement around the wearers' waist. She regarded the dragon with utter distaste, for it was a symbol of what, in her mind, were the Chinese monsters. He regarded her only with a smirk of a smile, and by holding out his arm courteously, as was to be expected of a future husband. But she knew all too well that a polite smile could conceal a thousand emotions, and so, she gathered the folds of her kimono gently and gracefully drifted past his form to the manor's largest tatami room. That was where the ceremony was to be.
Though her hostility was subtle, he either didn't realize it, or was ignoring it. Chitose suspected it was the latter of the two, and kept up her subdued dislike of his purpose, even as he opened the door for her. The first thing her deep, ocean eyes trained her sight to was her father himself. Upon seeing his visage, her whole demeanor softened and her pace, though still graceful, hastened so she may be by his side. Her steps seemed to eerily echo in the room, and she didn't realize the three identical gazes that followed her.
Upon reaching her father, she sensed that something in him was wavering. Looking into his eyes, eyes she had always loved and trusted, she saw fear. She gripped his white gi, her fingers lightly grazing the black hakama underneath. A formal haori draped over his shoulders was also a deep jet black. Black wasn't worn to a wedding, and his outfit depicted that of a warrior about to commit hitokiri. But hitokiri was only performed as a warrior's suicide for a past shame. Either that…
'Or to give one's life so another may live…' her mind finished, completing the mind-numbingly horror she'd just realized. Her panicked state only worsened due to the painfully mournful, yet still so soft and loving gaze he gave her. She shook her head slowly at first, in disbelief, but increased her speed as she backed away, wringing her hands as crystal tears laced her eyes, as if to make the reality untrue.
"No…NO! Otoo-chan! Don't do this!" she commanded, her voice starting to break at his name. He just smiled wryly, shaking his head and moving forward to clutch her shoulders.
"It is already done, my jewel. I have signed the Count's proposing contract. This is the only way to protect you. So let your father give you this one last gift…" he soothed, his finger tracing the outline of her cheek down to her jaw line and finally withdrawing at the tip of her chin. By this time, the pools of tears had overflown and evolved into clear, shining rivers on her face. A single tear fell off her chin, falling onto the color of her white shift and making a small, damp stain that he brushed at absentmindedly.
"Can a new contract not be made?" she questioned, her voice soft and distant, the beautiful darkness of despair lacing her words. A small, but cruel laugh made her head turn to pay mind to the two men standing opposite of where her father had been. One looked exactly like the man she knew she was to marry only he wore a cloak, the other looked as similar as the other two but his hair was long and tied back. She glared, uncharacteristically, at the three men who were deceivingly beautiful.
"You monsters! Cold and heartless creatures like you shouldn't even exist!" she practically hissed. Never had such malice, nor pure, untamed hate overwhelmed her like this. It threatened to consume her, and her self control was barely keeping it in check.
"We are not monsters, my dear girl. And the only truly cold and heartless creatures on this dying planet are humans," the one with long hair said calmly, almost teasingly, to her.
"Humans feel empathy and kindness. That is much more than can be said of you, Count D!" she retorted, each word spat out like a viper's strike. He only smiled and pointed to the cloaked one, almost a cheerful air about him.
"No, no, my dear! My father here is the Count, actually. I'm merely a doctor. And my son, in turn, is your new husband!" he explained, as if talking to a child. Then his stare and smile grew cold, and he walked over, taking hold of her arm. "You'll not want to linger here, my dear. You've lived among humans so long, both you and your father have adopted their tainted views, and your father's life shall be the one to pay the debt of the suffering the humans you protect cause."
Chitose struggled to detach him from herself, but his long nails dug into her tender arm, making her wince. But she refused to cry out, for that, she knew, is what the monsters wanted. His grip was soon joined by the demon she had been given to. They ushered her out the shoji door and she cast a tearful gaze over her shoulder to see her father bravely staring down the eldest creature. Upon feeling her gaze, he looked to her with a small, loving and gentle smile.
"Su ki da, Chitose…" Yoshihiro said, his voice cracking for the first time in his life. Chitose held no tears back as she nodded, while the demons closed the shoji door. She turned away, unable to face what brutalities her father had to endure.
"Otoo-chan…Su kid a…itsumo…" she whispered, her voice drowned out by the splattering of her father's life blood on the shoji paper door. Taking in a breath, she scrounged up the courage to go to him. She wrenched out of her captor's loosened grips and flung open the door, only to find an assortment of animals looming over his dying body, their muzzles stained a rusty red from his blood. She pierced their content and feeding silence with a scream, and ran wildly at them, knocking and harshly kicking and pushing them away.
"Get away from him! Leave him, you mangy beasts!" she all but screeched, her voice was so high and panicked. Dropping to her knees, she felt the sickening damp of the blood soaking into her kimono, but paid no mind to it as she cradled Yoshihiro's body to her own. Though she tried desperately not to, her tears fell into small cuts on his face, making him twitch in pain.
She surveyed his wounds in horror. How could such damage be done in a matter of seconds? His torso had been mauled open, various insides bearing teeth marks, and a few missing hunks of soft flesh altogether. But what struck her most was a long, yet thin claw mark going across his chest. She knew no animal could make such small, even slices. Her gaze shot up to look at the cloaked one, whom had simply overlooked the proceedings.
"Why? Why take his life, in lieu of taking me prisoner! He didn't deserve this!" she demanded, then turned to her father as he coughed up rich, red blood, "Oh father…you're so foolish. I know nothing without you to guide me…"
"You…" Yoshihiro started, pausing for an inadequate breath, "will learn. I believe you'll…give this world the…balance it lost so long ago…" The corners of his mouth twitched in an attempt of a smile, and his right hand, the only one not ripped off and dined on, brushed her cheek and cleared her tears for a second. She went to answer him, to ask what she must do to fulfill his belief in her, but his eyes darkened and lost the essence of life in them as his hand fell to her lap, unable to support itself through a dead form. She felt her heart tear in one corner, a scar that she'd always bear from this moment.
"Otoo-chan…I promise your faith in me won't go unrealized…" she murmured, closing his eyes for him, and placing a kiss on his forehead. Silently, she vowed she would never give these three the gratification of seeing her cry ever again. "Count…does the contract say I cannot bury him? Or must he fill the stomachs of these wretched beasts?"
"You may. You have endured enough. D, place the ring on her finger, and the contract will be fulfilled," he said, speaking to the youngest, her new husband. He bowed, and walked to her, slipping it onto her finger wordlessly as she ignored him, so intent on driving off any manner of animal foolish enough to try and claim her father's flesh. With a liquid movement, D took a rosewood pin out of her hair and sliced his skin, as her ebony hair tumbled down and covered her in a wavy, protective barrier down her back and around her face. D flicked his hand in a way that each animal heeded his call, and he spoke to them.
"Leave now. Go home, we'll be back home soon," he ordered, and they left silently. For this, Chitose was thankful, but she would never tell him that fact. The Count, on the other hand, knelt down and picked up Yoshihiro from Chitose's arms in a movement too quick for her to realize, but she gasped in shock to the action.
"You said I can bury him! You would go back on your word?" she screamed, her voice hoarse and tired, her eyes red from crying. He shook his head and pulled his hood forward, shadowing his face.
"I am doing it for you. Your heart, and your mind, needs rest. Go to your new home granddaughter, for you must learn to be useful to our purpose," he said, his calm, monotone voice unwavering as he walked away and disappeared, fading into the air.
"Miss Chitose, grandfather is right. You need to rest your soul now," D confirmed softly, leading her out, "and you need to change as well."
"I do not need to be told how to take care of myself by you, demon. I do not expect you to understand my pain, but I expect you to keep away. I have no desire to become close to you." With this, Chitose slid out of his attempt at a comforting hold as he led her, and led herself. Walking a little ways away from him, so as not having to touch the creature she felt so repulsed by.
He only nodded in response as they left for the pet shop. The prison she would have to reside in. the constant reminder of the animalistic savagery she despised. So, unbeknownst to D, Chitose promised to help any human he tried to trick with one of his evil creatures. The demon would claim no more lives, if she had any say.
An: WOOT! Done! So, what cha' think? Review please, since I'd be very happy if you do. Next chap coming soon! …I just have to type it up… OK! Japanese translations!
Otoo-chan: father
Su kid a: I love you, or as in Chitose's case, I'll love you
Itsumo: forever
Hitokiri: a warrior's death, from Warring States Era of Japan
Tatami: a traditional, large Japanese room
Kimono: why are you even READING this is you don't know what this is!
Koibito: 'my love', or 'precious'
Well! That rounds it out I think! So yeah…review everyone!