A/N Rawr – longest fanfic ever. A story set in Konoha, centred around Sasuke going through grief over his love/hate of Gaara. He really can't decide. Oh the angst

The Five Stages of Grief

Denial

I can't like him. Not Gaara. It goes against nature. I should like girls for Christ's sake. I'm a boy. I should like girls, maybe Ino, Hinata or even, dare I say it, Sakura. Jesus Christ why is my mind so goddamn fucked up? I don't like Gaara, I'm just emphasising a stupid thought. But…Every time I see him, my chest starts hammering, my mouth goes dry, and I totally lose my cool. I just thank God that one of those stupid fangirls haven't noticed my 'obsession'. Not that I have an obsession. I do NOT like Gaara. At all. If I just completely ignore him, maybe I can forget everything. It's worth a try.

-later that day -

It's raining like hell, but I just had to get out of the house, so I'm just walking around. Oh shit. He's there. Walking down the street, his shining hair plastered down to his face from all the rain. He looks so beautiful and gentle. NO! Stop it. He's just an ordinary boy. I'll just kinda look at the floor and not acknowledge him. I walk past, keeping my eyes on the path in front. Suddenly I noticed two sandaled feet directly before me. Oh crap. Gaara is clearly not moving so I go to step sideways. He copies my movement immediately. He wants to talk. Shit. It's very unlike Gaara to actually initiate conversation so I'm gonna have to start. I bring my face up. I'm taller than Gaara, practically everyone is, yet he seems to tower over me. . He's so small, yet so perfect. I look down into his pale face and my mouth drops. He's smiling. At me. I swallow hard and make an attempt at a smile. It doesn't really work. Gaara is still smiling, yet he won't say anything. I guess it's up to me. Crap.

"Uh..Hi, um, Gaara" Oh God I sound so freaking nervous.

"Hello, Sasuke" He's still smiling. This is weird.

"So, um, nice weather isn't it?" Oh. Dear. God. It's bloody pissing it down, I'm talking to a sexy maniac and I decide to comment on the weather. God, I'm such a FREAK.

"Sasuke-kun. It is raining. Do you like the rain?"

"Uh, yeah, I guess…it's, well, wet…" Oh shit what the HELL am I talking about? Well, at least I can definitely say I won't have to think about Gaara ever again after this conversation. He's gonna be keeping FAR away from me now. He must think I'm a nutcase. Hold on he's smiling at me still. His cheeks are burning up. Is he ill? A fever, perhaps? I notice a slight tinge of embarrassment in his expression. Then it hits me. Gaara is blushing at me! He opens his mouth to speak,

"Sasuke. I know you…like me" Awwwwwww crap. Ok, here's the plan. Play it cool. just deny the whole thing, then walk away. Then try to get my life back on track. I must just remember, STAY COOL.

"WHAT! NO! I DON'T!" Hell yeah, that was playing it cool…

"Indeed. I thought you might say that. I must go now, but I will see you soon Sasuke-kun. Very soon."

I watched as he bowed briefly, before turning and walking back along the path. His clothes and hair were plastered to his fair skin, but it just made him even more beautiful. NO! I've got to stop thinking like that. However, my eyes still followed his figure as he retreated into the shadows and turned a corner. And then he was gone. Oh bugger, I did NOT handle that well. I shook my head, trying to clear my messed-up thoughts. I couldn't like Gaara. I just couldn't. And yet, it seems so obvious that even Gaara himself noticed I like him. No, I DON'T like him, remember? Arrrgghhh I'm so confused. My head is still reeling from the shock of Gaara actually speaking let alone blushing! I am in so much shit. I'm just gonna go home and lie down. Hopefully forever. That way I'll never have to think about Gaara again, or face him and admit what a huge prat I made of myself. I think at the moment that would be the best idea. I'll never have to screw my poor little brain up thinking Gaara-thoughts again. That way I can honestly deny the fact that I'm 'in love' with Gaara. Which I'm not. I'm NOT. Not at all.

God, I'm confused.

A/N Whew. I'm DONE! "joy jump" Uber, uber happy about that. I think this is officially the longest fanfic I have ever written! "Shock". Please review…once I get 2 reviews I will post the next chapter