Chapter 3: The Dark Lord and the Clown
The flight to London was silent. A nerving, considering the plane was filled with the most notorious super villains of the Americas. Scarecrow looked in sock while the Mad Hatter stared blankly out of the window next to him. Even the infamous Joker was silent, probably formulating a new escape plan for the London Asylum.
The Rogues were met at the airport by an old convict's bus. On the side, the name read "London Insane Asylum", as if to announce new lunatics to the whole of England.
Not one of the Arkhamites made an attempt to escape while British guards guided them into their seats on the bus. Each was cuffed to their own seat without protest. Once the final Rogue, Croc, was dragged into his seat, the bus driver who was a small, pudgy man with a mousy face and hair, took his seat behind the wheel.
The London Asylum was in the heart of London. It was a gray, stone building mixed in with the other brick and plaster structures, and all shared similar broken and dilapidated windows. The main entrance was set off a busy avenue on a two-lane by street. A double wooden door and an old rusting sign along the side announced they had reached their destination.
The bus cam to a halt and the driver scurried off to allow a man in a black uniform robe with short brown hair and a chiseled face to enter.
One by one the Rogues filed off the bus, all of them in shock or intimidated by this sudden change. For some who were unable to stand alone, mostly Croc, two large guards also in black robes, carries the weak through the entrance doors.
The Joker, last and most alert of the group, gazed out the bus to see a hooked nosed man with long, greasy, black hair checking names off a list. In a broken second story window, the driver's face appeared with a nervous excited expression. When the attendant reached him, Joker glanced at him. No name tag, no ID, not even a patch that said "London Insane Asylum". Just what kind of place was this?
The Rogues were guided into a large cinder block room that looked very much like the inside of Arkham Asylum in Gotham. They were left in a large open room with only a stage raised in the front of the far wall. A nurse, the only hint of a nurse was that she was a woman, with heavy eyelids, dark hair and a drawn face made her way through, unlocking the Rogues' shackles.
The Rogues looked around at each other, stretching and rubbing their wrists from the cuffs and straightjackets. This asylum was becoming even more unusual by the minute.
A lone door at the side of the stage swung open and a tall thin robed man stepped out onto the stage. He was followed by and aristocratic gentleman with long silver blonde hair and a look of something souring under his nose.
The Rogues turned from one another to gazed with a defensive suspicion at the two men before them. Especially the tall, thin robe, whose hood hid its owner's face.
"So, these are the infamous Gotham Rogues…" a cold high voice broke the hush. Long pale hands reached up to draw back the hood and reveal a red-eyed man with slitted pupils, a baldhead and snake nostrils in place of a normal human nose. "I must admit some disappointment…" He surveyed the group before him. "Nothing but muggles…" He said in an undertone.
Joker, once again the most arrogant and least jet-lagged, took a step forward. "Listen, snakey, who do you think you are?"
"My name is Lord Voldemort," Voldemort scowled at the Joker as if he was a child questioning authority.
"Well, my "Lord Voldemort", I'd like to thank you for getting us out of Arkham, but I'm afraid it's time for us to be going," Joker gave a mocking bow and gave the motion for the others to start to leave.
"I wouldn't advise that…" Voldemort eyed the only exit to the auditorium, where the two large guards, the size of Killer Croc, blocked the way.
Joker frowned and turned on Voldemort. "And just how do you expect to keep us here? I don't see any guns or Billy clubs, Voldie…"
Voldemort reached into his robes and removed a long thin rod of wood. Without a word, he raised it at the Joker.
Joker was snickering. Behind him the Rogues grinned at this self-proclaimed "Lord" Voldemort.
"This guy's a nutzo!" Joker whispered loudly over his shoulder, thumbing at Voldemort.
Voldemort gave the Joker a cold look and flicked his wand.
The Joker looked down at his feet and let out a shriek as he began to float upwards.
Voldemort turned his attention from the Joker, who was now levitating near the ceiling, and asked the Rogues menacingly, "Anyone else want to leave?"
The Rogues, however, were not paying any attention to Voldemort. Their faces gazed open-mouthed at the ceiling.
Voldemort's expression dropped to one of appalled bewilderment.
The Joker, completely over the shock of being lifted into thin air, had proceeded to do a backstroke around the room. His famous grin returned, he laughed hysterically when he caught the look on Voldemort's face. "Gee, Voldie, old chum, won't you join me for a swim?" He said in an uncanny British accent. "The air's just fine!"
Voldemort glowered, and with another wave of his wand, flung the Joker into the crowd of Rogues, taking out Killer Croc, the Mad Hatter, Scarecrow, and Two-Face.
"What a rush!" Joker staggered to his feet while the other pushed and shoved to stand. "Harls, remind me to get me on of them when we get out of here." He waved a hand at Voldemort's wand.
"No problem, boss!" Harley chirped, and gave an over dramatic salute.
"The riddle is…" the Riddler stepped forward, eyeing the Joker, who had taken the liberty of using Harley as a leaning post. "Why you have brought us here in the first place."
"Yes…" Penguin continued. "It does seem odd that one of your "abilities" would require our help…"
Voldemort hid the fact that he was taken aback. Despite the clown, some of these muggles might actually possess a brain. "And who suggested that I need any help from the likes of you?"
"Well yah brought us here, didn't cha?" Two-Face growled darkly, flipping his two-headed coin.
"Sure!" Joker regained his composure and joined in. "Why even bother bringing us here if yah didn't need us?"
Voldemort bored into the clown with his red eyes, hoping to break the Joker's ever-present grin. Joker, on the other hand, stared right back as if to challenge the Dark Lord.
"Well?" Poison Ivy stepped up to break the Joker and Voldemort's staring contest. Her voice reeked with impatience and her arms were crossed, foot tapping on the floor.
Voldemort looked cross and he did nothing to conceal it. He did not intimidate these people at all. It must have been a trait that came with being insane. He could have used the Imperius Curse, but then he was not looking to control them. "I have a proposition for all of you…"
"Oh, so you brought us here for a deal!" Joker's surprise was melodramatic.
Voldemort ignored him and continued, "I need you all to take over Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and keep them "occupied" for a period of time…"
"Hog-what?" Scarecrow exclaimed, looking slightly confused.
"Wait!" Joker waved his arms as if to quiet the clamor around him. "You mean to say there's more of you freaks?"
Voldemort raised a bald brow. At least he was not the one running around with a permanent smile and green hair. "If that is how you put it," he said evenly, resisting the urge to kill the Joker right there. "So you accept my offer?"
The Rogues gathered in a huddle. It appeared they were whispering about nothing. A yelp that could have only been the Joker's escaped the crowd and he fell flat on his back holding his nose. Poison Ivy was towering over him brandishing her fists. "Try it again, fool, and it'll be more than just you're nose!"
The others broke the huddle and the Mad Hatter approached the stage. "We accept your offer."