Title: Expectations
Author: GEM (Green Eyed Monster), aka Punny, the innocent dwarf
Email Address: Complete
Category:
Pairings: None
Spoilers: Inauguration
Season: Season 7
Sequel/Series Info: N/A
Rating: PG
Content Warnings: Snirt alert?
Summary: Everyone is trying to do what is expected
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Stargate (II) Productions, Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. This story is for entertainment purposes only, and no money exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author. This story may not be posted elsewhere without the consent of the author.
File Size (kb):
Archive: Jackfic
Authors' Note:
EXPECTATIONS
Jack sat still, his back straight enough for the military's approval, and maybe even Grandma's. His hands were gracefully folded in front of him on the smooth table top.
He didn't do anything. Didn't fidget. Didn't play with his pencil or doodle on the table. Didn't even drum his fingers.
He was just going to sit and wait, like a good little colonel.
Because he wanted to. Because it was the proper thing to do.
The General's dire warnings had nothing to do with it. He wasn't even thinking about the possibility of scrubbing latrines with his toothbrush 18 hours a day. In Alaska. Till he was 65.
Hammond glanced at his watch. "Shouldn't be long now," he commented. He leveled a serious look at his subordinate. "Need I remind you how important your behavior is?"
"No, sir."
They had to be extremely careful now that Kinsey was the Vice President; he would take any opportunity to remove them from the SGC. Hammond hadn't wanted Jack to be here, or anywhere near Vice President Kinsey. However, he had little choice in the matter. Both Thor and the President had requested Jack's presence. It was just a simple introduction, the new administration meeting the nation's allies. How bad could it be?
Hammond glanced at Jack again. He could practically see the halo shining over the man's head. Somehow, he still didn't trust the image. "I have your word that you won't do anything to upset the Vice President?"
Jack dropped his hands under the table suddenly, a concerned look crossing his face.
Hammond narrowed his eyes. "Colonel, don't you dare pull anything!"
Jack's eyes went wide, his hands still under the table. "Uh, sir..."
Damn that man! It was obvious to Hammond that Jack was up to something. Before he could do anything about it, the door opened and the new President and Vice President of the United States entered. Hammond stood and greeted them both.
"Good morning, General Hammond," Kinsey said pleasantly. "Nice to see that at least some of our armed forces are acquainted with common courtesy." He stepped into the room, looking pointedly at Jack, still sitting at the table.
Hammond sent Jack a thunderous glare over Kinsey's shoulder. The colonel knew damned well he should at least stand to greet his new Commander-in-Chief. But he sat there stiffly, not even offering a handshake. In fact, his hands were still down under the table. "Colonel, what are you playing with?"
Jack's eyes widened to the size of saucers as his hands flew back up above the table.
"Nothing!" But he had clearly been caught doing something. His eyes were still wide, and his collar was darkening with sweat; he looked as close to panicked as Hammond had ever seen him.
"Stand up, Colonel," Hammond ordered.
Jack hesitated.
"You see, Mr President? General Hammond can't get his people to obey even the simplest of orders. How can he be expected to run a program like the Stargate?" Kinsey was triumphant. This was going better than he had dared to hope. O'Neill was clearly up to something. Now he'd either have to stand up and reveal whatever childish prank he was hiding under the table or else sit there and allow himself and Hammond to appear unfit for their crucial duties.
The President looked curious, waiting to see how things would play out.
"Sir --" Jack began.
Kinsey cut him off. "Stand up to address your Commander-in-Chief, Colonel!" he demanded. If his previous comment hadn't moved the Colonel to his feet, then the man considered whatever was under the table to be worse than disobeying an order. And Kinsey wanted all the evidence he could get to remove this pair from the SGC.
Jack slapped his hands down on the table and stood, turning to face his commander, his commander-in-chief, and Kinsey. He boldly caught Kinsey's eye and slowly raised his right arm to salute. If he was going out, he was going to do it in a blaze of -- well, you couldn't exactly call it 'glory.'
Alaska, here I come.
"Attention!" Hammond barked, acting quickly before any 'privates' joined the Colonel's half-naked salute.
Jack came to attention, gratefully feeling his jacket slide back down to restore some of his dignity.
Hammond still couldn't believe his eyes. The Colonel had been in full dress uniform when they entered the conference room. How had the man managed to remove the bottom half of it without him noticing something? And why?
The answer came quickly enough; before anyone could even comment. A beam of white shone briefly, leaving behind one small alien.
"Greetings from the Asgard to the new Supreme Commander of the United States," Thor said formally in his smooth dulcet tones. "We hope our --" he hesitated briefly, as if confirming the term, " -- prank -- is fitting for your holiday."
He looked around expectantly for their reaction; the council had debated at length over whether and how to show respect for their ally's tradition. In the end, they had decided that it would be best to participate, since O'Neill had described it as one of their highest holidays. Recalling from their previous meeting that the leader called Kinsey did not hold O'Neill in high regard, Thor had suggested that O'Neill himself should be the focus of the surprise event to demonstrate the high esteem in which the Asgard held him. Much effort had been expended to perfect the precise timing and delicate transporter work.
The Tau'ris' mouths were all slightly open, and O'Neill had turned a remarkable shade of pink. Hopefully, that meant that their contribution to the holiday was acceptable.
"I believe the customary saying is 'April Fool.' "