Warnings: Potential spoilers, yaoi, angst, cursing.
Disclaimer: Bleach belongs to Kubo Tite and the characters depicted aren't originally gay.

Notes: This is the dorky love chapter. lol It ends here... like it's in the manga currently. Ishida stops going to school and the Vaizaards appear. Hope it doesn't sound too lame. >.> lol

Darkest Desires

Chapter 4

He had almost been caught. What the hell was happening to him? Ichigo clenched his fists letting out a growl of frustration. He kept on losing it over and over again. After Sado was long gone, he turned towards the door he was guarding and opened it abruptly. He couldn't even think straight as the anger kept on building up inside him.

"Ishida! What the hell you're thinking, you fucking idiot!" He snapped. He was being totally unreasonable and he knew it.

"What the fuck, you moron!" Ishida yelled back at him in surprise. He couldn't believe Ichigo had come back to yell at him after all that. Like it was all his fault.

Ichigo held himself back, this wasn't how he was supposed to say it. He took a deep breath, and closed his eyes as he slid the door shut again. He looked up for the skinnier boy once again. Fatigued by his own surge of emotions, Ishida crawled back leaning on the nearest wall. He was lightly panting, with some hair sticking to his damp and pale face, glasses almost falling off and still tied, Ichigo observed.

Ichigo came near him, lowering himself on one knee to be able to see Ishida more closely. Ishida, now more composed, glared at him silently with his icy-cold blue eyes. Concerned, Ichigo stretched his hand out to adjust the glasses on his face. The look the Quincy gave off pained him greatly, and he flinched a bit as his voice came out shaky when he spoke.

"Ishida... look, I'm sorry... I didn't..."

"You should be more truthful to yourself, Kurosaki." Ishida sounded serious and his voice came out deep and low. He was really tired, but he had to make the shinigami realize the truth. This couldn't keep going on forever.

"What do you mean? Are you saying I'm not sorry? That I wanted this all to happen!" Ichigo's voice escalated as he grew tense, he was about to jump the other boy in his anger.

"Yes." The Quincy confirmed without any sign of emotion.

Ichigo suddenly jumped at him, unable to hold himself back any longer. He pressed the other against the wall with all his strength, his forearm against the pale boy's throat, strangling him.

"Shut up... SHUT UP! I'm not! This can't be! Don't be stupid!" He shouted visibly disturbed.

Ishida squirmed and winced in pain, his wrists still tied, unable to breathe as the orange-haired boy kept on pushing him. Startled to see he was actually hurting the other boy, Ichigo quickly drew back. He couldn't believe in what he had just done. Ishida gasped and choked for air as Ichigo released him. He watched the shinigami boy from the corner of his eyes, still panting.

Ichigo shut his eyes tightly and punched the floor carelessly, managing to bruise his knuckle. He lowered his head and muttered, nearly crying.

"I didn't want to hurt you... Uryuu... that's not true... I didn't want... dammit..."

Ishida looked at him a bit surprised. The corner of his lips slowly turned up into a half smile.

"I know that, Ichigo. You're a kind person. You would never purposely hurt your friends. I wasn't talking about that."

Ichigo stopped. Slightly confused he lifted his head up to look again at the boy's blue eyes.

"Wha-...?"

Ichigo's eyes widened. Ishida had suddenly closed in, their lips met each other's. He was leaning over him, planting a soft kiss on his lips with his eyes closed. Ichigo quickly forgot what he was thinking, almost melting at the other boy's touch, he reached out to embrace him in his arms, pulling him closer, and let himself fall on his back bringing the other along.

Ishida kissed him gently, and the orange-haired boy corresponded equally sucking onto his tongue and licking his lips. Ishida blushed slightly as he felt gentleness in Ichigo's lips for the first time. Ichigo rubbed his hand through the other boy's back, allowing himself for the first time to feel that body he had craved for so much.

Ishida broke off the passionate kiss with a low moan and buried his face in the crook of Ichigo's neck. Ichigo shivered a bit, holding him tighter. And they stayed like that for quite a while until Ishida mumbled.

"Ichigo... could you untie me now?"

"Uhh?" Ichigo blinked, he was totally spacing out.

Ishida frowned, he was very uncomfortable with his hands tied and his body sore all over. But he was so tired, and Ichigo's arms were very accomodating at the moment.

"Ishida?"

"Uhm?" He mumbled lazily.

"Did you say something?"

Some time passed and no answer came. Ichigo decided to take that as a 'no'.

"Uryuu?"

"Uhm?" It seemed he was still awake at least.

"So... does this mean we like each other or something?" Ichigo asked hesitantly.

"Uhm."

Ichigo blinked annoyed. What kind of answer was that?

"Do you... do you... arrgh." Ichigo grumbled feeling a bit frustrated.

"Yes, I like you, Ichigo. Now would you stop talking? My head hurts."

Ichigo's cheeks flushed, he felt awkward. Some more time passed in silence. Running his hand down on Ishida's back he remembered he was still tied.

"Ishida, we can't stay here. We have to get up, what if someone comes in and sees us like this?"

No answer. Slowly, Ichigo tried to stand, rolling Ishida's body gently on his back. He looked at the boy's face and noticed he had fallen asleep. Supporting Ishida's head with one of his arms, he brushed the dark blue hair from his face with his free hand. Then he placed it on the other boy's cheek and traced his fingers down on his chin, neck, collar bone and chest, since his shirt was still open. The sleeping boy let out a satisfied sigh. And Ichigo leaned over him to once again kiss his lips.

The door to the room was suddenly slid open.

"Ichigo?" Ichigo looked up to see who it was. And there he was, the person he less wanted to see in there, Keigo standing in all his glory, wearing the most shocked expression ever in his face.

"And the four-eyes? OH MY GOD! My eyes! I wasn't supposed to see this! My best friend is gay! And he has a fetish for bondage and glasses! I'll never get over this... I'll need years and years of therapy! " He panicked running around and flailing his arms.

"You're not my best friend." He mumbled to himself before he quickly stood up to kick the panicking dork to the floor. "Shut the hell up, you idiot! Listen, if you ever say a word to anyone I'll fucking kill you!"

Keigo quickly nodded at the threat with a somewhat pathetic smile. "Okay, okay... my lips are sealed." Yeah right, like he could count on Keigo to keep a secret, he rolled his eyes. "But, Ichigo..."

"Get outta here!" He scowled at the other boy, who scurred out quickly.

Ichigo returned to the dark-haired boy lying on the floor, he was awake now after all the shouting. Ichigo yelled out, nervous with what had just happened.

"Dammit! Now the whole school will know! I told you to get up! Geez!"

"I would get up if you untied me as I've already asked many times." Ishida glared at him fiercely.

"Um... yeah, right." Ichigo blinked as he remembered about it. Ishida sat down and Ichigo kneeled behind him to untie him. He tugged at it many times, sighing and grumbling until he snapped once again.

"Dammit! This is a fucking mess!" He sighted the scissors nearby and picked them up, a bit surprised at the blood on it.

"What are you doing, Kurosaki? Hey... What? You ruined my tie, you moron!" Ishida complained as the pieces of the fabric cut all over fell from his wrists.

"The hell I was supposed to do? The thing wouldn't come out!"

Ishida sighed and said nothing more as he rubbed his wrists and buttoned his shirt up. After that he tried to stand up, but his legs were still wobbly and he ended up collapsing in Ichigo's arms who had reached out for him.

"Uryuu, are you okay? Maybe you should go home for the day." He seemed worried.

"Ah, yes... Thank you... I think I will..."

"This is my fault, isn't it?" Ichigo's voice sounded pained, and Ishida raised his head to look at him. "Uryuu, I can't keep on doing this. I don't want to hurt you anymore. Or anyone else... I keep thinking, what if I end up doing this to someone else? Maybe I shouldn't be here."

"Don't worry, Ichigo." Ishida smiled at him with confidence. "Just be truthful to yourself. And everything will be fine. You can beat him..."

Ichigo found these words to be reassuring. As he admitted his feelings for his friend, the Hollow within him didn't show up anymore. A week later though, Ishida stopped coming to school. Ichigo couldn't find him anywhere no matter how much he searched for him. He had simply vanished. Where could he be? Why had he disappeared like that? Ichigo worried, but soon other problems came up. And he would have to fight the Hollow inside him yet again...

(The End)