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Chapter Twelve

Tap, tap, tap…click, click, click….pen on paper scratched away unconcerned about the actual words written on the official looking document. The room was small, but decorated in a sense to convey warmth and comfort to the occupants. There was a box of tissues situated strategically between the two plump olive chairs. The walls were coated in a faint lavender color decorated with a vine of ivy winding around the top of the walls. Marissa Atwood sat nervously in a too plump olive chair trying to get comfortable. Moving around slightly, she tried to find a comfortable spot while waiting for Dr. Brown to return. Glancing down at her wrist, she shifted again some more when she realized that Ryan was now almost twenty minutes late for her first radiation appointment. Radiation…such a scary word. Marissa warily looked at the door as it opened, but it was only a nurse. A slight stinging sensation burned at the back of her eyes, but she held her head high up as Dr. Brown took a seat across from like he did only a few weeks ago.

"Mrs. Atwood, the lab tests have come back. I have been told that Mr. Atwood informed you of your condition?"

He looked up and for a moment Marissa was startled to see genuine empathy written across the wrinkles of his face. She couldn't speak, only nodded her head and grasped Ryan's hand tighter.

"Good," he stated when she nodded her head. He paused a second looking up at the young woman sitting across from him desperately holding the hand of her husband. They were both so young, too young to have to deal with something like this. "Your type of tumor is not uncommon; however, it is one of the most aggressive. Due to the size of the tumor and the location, it is not operable as of the moment. It will be a tough fight. However, I believe that there is always a chance for survival. Do you have any questions?"

Marissa gazed at the doctor with empty eyes, while Ryan looked as if he wanted to hit something. However, after glaring at the doctor for several seconds as the messenger of bad news, he turned to Marissa. She sat silently still eyes focused straight ahead. A lone tear dripped slowly down her face and splattered across her hand. Immediately, Ryan was out of his chair and kneeling in front of her. He grasped her chin gently and forced her to look at him. He didn't say anything, just stared into her eyes trying to find some recognition of the woman he loved. Slowly her eyes focused on Ryan's and filled with silvery liquid that poured down her face. Her breath came in gasps that soon turned to shuddering sobs. Ryan pulled her into his arms and sat on the floor cradling her broken body while whispering reassurances in her ear.

Dr. Brown watched the couple broken on the floor and felt something in his stomach twist. Sometimes, he wondered about why he continued to practice this job. However, if he could just save one young woman like Marissa the world would be at some peace again. His heart was breaking for the young woman and her husband that looked at him with the empty knowledge that the love of his life might not grow old with him. Dr. Brown never tried to become too attached to his patients, but he had a feeling that Marissa Atwood was going to change everything. It was hauntingly similar to his first case thirty years. He had been not able to save Hazel Jones, but Marissa Atwood was another chance at playing God. He had another chance to right the world, and damn would he fail her.

Ryan rubbed Marissa's back trying to convey warmth while closing his eyes at the thought of his wife having cancer. Looking up at the older man behind the desk, Ryan was surprised to see Dr. Brown's head on the desk within his arms. Looking up, Dr. Brown caught his eyes, but didn't say anything. However, his glance conveyed everything Ryan needed to know. This man would fight against the impossible; he would fight for his wife…

Ryan rushed through the silent corridors of the hospital glancing at his watch for the sixteenth time and cursing silently. The day had been horrible, and now he was late for Marissa's first radiation treatment. He waved to the nurse at the station and returned her gentle smile and followed the direction she pointed. Coming to an erupt stop outside the door, he slowed down and peered into the room. Marissa sat hunched in an olive green chair uncomfortably rubbing her arms as if she was cold. Her gaze was focused on the wall where a clock ticked ominously, and Ryan felt his heart thump at the thought of her sitting there scared and alone. He gently opened the door, and whispered, "Hey," into the silent room.

Marissa's eyes widened rapidly and turned quickly in her chair falling over in the process. Ryan quickly walked over scanning her for injury. She sat stunned on the floor looking up at him with wide blue eyes. Ryan gently reached out and helped her off the ground taking her into his arms as soon as she was on two stable feet.

"I didn't think you were coming." She muffled into his shirt while rubbing her nose across his chest.

"I know, I know. I am so sorry Marissa. The traffic was horrible and…"

"Shuhhh," she placed a finger on his lips cutting off his words, "You're here now."

Ryan stared down at her and softly kissed her fingers. Entwining their hands, he led her back to the upturn chair and sat down pulling her onto his lap. She shifted her legs to a comfortable place and looped her arms around his neck. Leaning into his chest, she looked up at him matching blue for blue. "I'm glad you are here. I'm so…" her words were cut off as Dr. Brown returned.

"Are you ready Marissa?"

Driving up the long drive in the dark to the cottage by the sea, Ryan glanced over at Marissa that slept in the passenger seat. She had fallen asleep soon after leaving the hospital exhausted. Parking the car, Ryan gently eased the door open and walked over to the other side. Unbuckling her seatbelt quietly, Ryan placed his hands under her legs and back scooping her up in the process. She muttered and stirred, but didn't wake. Ryan carried her up the door, but found himself unable to open to door. Leaning an elbow over, he rang the doorbell and waited for somebody to open the door.

Summer looked up startled at the sound, and glanced at the clock surprised at the time. She turned to Seth that sat with her watching television, and he watched her with concerned eyes.

"Where are the girls?" Summer asked while standing up.

"I think Nealy is doing work in her room, while Ella and Grace are playing dress up."

"Go take them into one room and distract them. Cohen, be stealth about it please."

"Always dear Summer, I know how to do stealth." Seth sent a small smile in her direction and placed a quick kiss on her forehead as comfort while taking the stairs two at a time.

Summer took a deep breath and quickly walked over to the door and unlocking the clasp. Pulling open the door, she took a deep breath trying to keep all the emotions at bay. Ryan stood there cradling Marissa in his arms. She slept, but Summer could see the dark eyes and pale skin. Swallowing, she stepped aside as Ryan walked by trying to smile.

"I sent Seth to entertain the girls. I didn't think Marissa wanted them to see her like this."

Ryan sent her a look thanks and looked down startled as Marissa's eyes flew open.

"Oh, my gosh. I think I'm going to be sick," she choked out while Ryan half pulled her half carried her to the bathroom.

Summer ran into the kitchen grabbing a dish towel and soaking it in cool water and pouring a small glass of water. Standing outside the bathroom door, she could hear Ryan whispering reassuringly to Marissa who continued to be sick. After a couple of minutes, Summer peaked in because it had turned silent. Ryan sat on the bathroom floor with Marissa's head in his lap. Her eyes were wide open, and he gently ran his fingers through her hair.

"Hey Coop. I brought you some water and cool wash cloth." Summer smiled brightly at her friend trying not to cry at the state of things.

Marissa smiled wearily and picked her head up from Ryan's lap. For a second, her vision went black but Ryan placed his arm around her stabilizing her dizziness. "Thanks Sum," she managed to croak out from her burning throat.

Summer walked over to the two and sat down cross legged. She handed Marissa the water, and gave the wash cloth to Ryan. Marissa smiled her thanks, while Ryan placed the cool cloth behind her neck.

"So," Summer began unsure where to begin.

"I'm fine Summer, just a little queasy," Marissa whispered while leaning her head back on Ryan's shoulder. "Nothing I have ever felt before, right?"

Summer smiled at her friend's attempt at a joke, and leaned back against the wall of the bathroom. Ryan placed a kiss on her best friend's forehead, and leaned back closing his eyes. Glancing over, Summer felt her heart go out to him. Summer knew that Ryan loved Marissa more than anything in this world. He was devastated and exhausted. Summer didn't know how she would respond if it was Seth sick. It was horrific enough that it was one of the two people she loved the most.

"How about we get you up into bed, Riss?" Ryan asked gently nudging Marissa who had been falling asleep. Nodding her head, she lifted up her head and took his hand. The world went dizzy for a second, but soon the concern faces of Ryan and Summer drifted back into her field of vision.

"I'm okay. Just a little dizzy for a second, but I'm okay now…"

Ryan and Summer exchanged a glance, while Marissa hung on dearly to Ryan's side. "How about I carry you to bed?" Ryan suggested looking down into her eyes.

"I don't need your help to get up the stairs," she snapped trying to stand on her own. Almost falling flat on her face, Marissa looked up at Ryan hopelessly as her legs turned to jelly.

Ryan smile gently at her and scooped her up kissing the side of her head. "It is okay to need help sometimes."

"I know. I just feel…I just feel so weak and helpless." Marissa mumbled into his neck.

"Man, I wish I had a husband who could carry me. But no, I have Cohen who has two scrawny bird arms that can't even swing a hammer," Summer declared while smiling at her best friend. Becoming more serious, she whispered, "Coop, let us help you."

Marissa looked into her best friend's eyes and back to Ryan. She knew they were only trying to help, and obviously she couldn't make it up the stairs. "Okay, I'm sorry. I just…"

"Don't worry about it Coop," Summer interrupted. "Now, let's go get you ready for bed." Summer watched as Ryan carried Marissa out of the bathroom and up the hall. She could just make out their words.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm okay Ryan, really. Just a little weak…You know, this isn't the first time you have made my legs go weak," she teased while Ryan chuckled.

Summer felt a tear drip down her cheek listening to her best friend. Everything was falling apart, and Marissa could still joke. What was the world coming to?

To be continued…

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