Title: Phantom Lover
Author: Kameko-chan
Pairings: Christophe/Kyle, onesided Kyle/Stan
Notes: Theme #4, 'Our Distance and That Person'
As I kiss you breathless in the bedroom we've shared for the past two years, I can tell that I'm not the one on your mind.
It's not always like this. Sometimes when I take you in my arms, your body answers to me, to my touches. Other times, like today, your responses are alien, as though my body is a conduit for your phantom lover. I often wonder how you can imagine his actions so well when he has never touched you like this, but you've had a long time to run through this imaginary scenario, haven't you?
You must have a very low opinion of my intelligence if you think I don't notice when your thoughts stray towards him. You're doing it again, right now, and I can't say anything because you look so amazing with your head thrown back like that. A strip of sunlight filters through the half-closed curtains and haze of smoke from my forgotten cigarette to light the stunning shock of red hair that falls across the pillow, perfectly completing the image. I pretend that I don't hear the whispered, half-broken syllables of his name that escape in your desperate gasps for air. You always call out the right name in the end, anyways.
If I thought that killing Stanley Marsh would close the gap between us, I'd find him right now and rip out his heart with my bare hands. All that would do, though, is make you cry, and at the end of it all I'd be more his replacement than ever. Damned no matter what I do, the story of my life.
I love you, Kyle. I wish you loved me back.
END
Eck, not how I wanted to turn out AT ALL.