CH 4
WARNING: some minor swearing in this chapter, there most likely will be no more swearing in this fic so I will not change the rating but if I do end up putting in some more (not counting bloody hell) I will give another warning at the beginning of the appropriate chapter.
An. I love my reviewers! Yes I've read HBP this will not be taking that book into consideration I may take a few ideas from the book, but for the most part Aftermath will be AU
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Molly watched the three friends closely. When Hermione and Ron collapsed Molly had refused to leave the room. A tear was sliding down her face, when suddenly there was another flash of light and Ron and Hermione woke up.
"We made it!" Hermione exclaimed.
"But what about Harry?" Ron looked down at his friend, no his brother. He would not celebrate until he knew whether or not Harry would be ok.
Molly rushed to her son and squeezed him for all she was worth, and then did the same to Hermione. All three look at Harry when he started screaming.
"I don't want to be here! Send me back!"
He just kept going on and on like that, his language getting more and more scandalous and colourful as he went. He was thrashing about making it impossible for anyone to get near him without getting hit by a flailing arm.
His yelling brought Poppy running, she had been talking to Albus in her office and he came running with her.
They both shot calming spells at him but they didn't seem to work so Poppy grabbed some dreamless sleep and forced it down his throat while the men in the room held him down. After Harry had fallen asleep Poppy turned to Dumbledore. "He should be calmer when he wakes up."
Albus just nodded, never taking his eyes off of Harry. It looked like he was going to cry. "There are so many things I could have and should have done differently. I could have made this so much easier for him to take but I let my pride blind me. I though I was doing what needed to be done! I thought I was doing what was best for him." the tears were starting to flow.
"I should have let him grow up here at Hogwarts, I should have kept a closer watch on the Dursleys. I could have….."
"Albus," Molly approached, "Playing the coulda, shoulda, wouldas isn't going to help anyone. Right now we need to focus on Harry and help him through this."
Albus took a calming breath "You are right, of course, Molly. We will help him through this, we owe it to him."
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They took him from his sanctuary, when he didn't want to go, they took him from his lovely void. He screamed at them, they said that they cared; they said it was for his own good. He wanted back in the void. There he was, not happy, but not sad either. He felt nothing, nothing was good.
If you felt nothing, you couldn't feel pain.
They tried to knock him out with those little wood sticks, he just wanted back in the void.
So he tried.
He tried. Again and again, he tried, but it was no use. He could not get back to his sanctuary. Damn them. They took it away from him. Damn him, for needing that place of nothingness in the first place.
Dark thoughts where prevalent in Harry Potter's mind as he woke up. He hated Voldemort, for ruining his life. He hated the death munchers, for following him. He hated the wizarding world for needing to be saved. But most of all he hated himself, not only for giving in to the boy-who-lived persona, but for not dieing when he had the chance.
'I just want it all to go away' was his last thought before drifting back into the world of dreams.
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It was three days later when Harry finally woke up to see Ron sitting next to his bed watching him. "Oi, mate! Bout time you woke up!" He exclaimed with a grin.
Harry just stared at him then sat up in bed. He looked around the hospital wing, empty except for the two of them.
"You've been out for several days; Madam Pomfrey said that you'd be hungry when you woke up."
Harry just looked at him, then shrugged. He didn't know why this redhead was talking to him or why he wanted anything to do with him. "Do I know you?" Harry asked. "And who is this Madam Pomfrey?"
Ron just stared at him in shock. "You don't remember me?"
"Should I?"
"We've been best mates since we were eleven!"
"Sorry, no." Harry replied apologetically.
"What about your name? Do you remember your name?"
"No. I don't know why but I know for a fact that I don't want to remember anything." Harry couldn't understand why this stranger was so upset by that. "It's alright really, I'm probably better off not remembering."
Harry lay back down as Ron just sat there in shock. Harry didn't remember anything! What was he going to do? "Well your name is Harry, mine is Ron. Hey Harry, you remember anything at all?"
"Yeah."
"What do you remember?"
"My sanctuary."
"That void place?"
"Yes, I want to go back there."
"Why? Why do you want to go back there? You belong here with us."
"I didn't feel any pain there, please let me go back." Harry whispered, tears welling up in his eyes. He rolled over and curled up into a trembling ball.
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Albus sat at his desk, his twinkle long gone and not likely to return anytime soon. "Mr. Weasley, from what you have told me it is my guess that Mr. Potter is suffering from magical amnesia. Poppy is checking this hypothesis out as we speak. It is similar to what the muggles get, but is controlled by a person's magic."
"What do you mean by that sir?" Molly asked, "I've never even heard of it."
The Weasleys and Hermione were all in the headmaster's office conferring over what had transpired between Ron and Harry. Albus did not look happy about this.
"Muggles will sometimes lose their memory if something traumatic enough happens to them, when that happens to a wizard it is a little easier to recover from as their personal magic made it happen and will slowly reverse it."
Dumbledore sat in thought for a moment. "You said that Harry mentioned a void?" Ron nodded, "And you and Miss Granger saw this void?" Two simultaneous nods, "Well, I won't know for sure until Poppy gets back to me but I would think that this void is Harry's memory. His magic sensed that the trauma that Harry has been through was too much for his mind to handle all at once, so it blocked of any part of his life that was unhappy or traumatic in some way."
"Which is pretty much his entire life!" Ginny sobbed out, she wanted to help but didn't know how. "What can we do Professor?"
"First thing we do is introduce one person to him, someone he already knows so that he will have help." Poppy answered as she walked through the door, having heard Ginny's question.
"So it is magical amnesia then."
"Yes, Albus, Mr. Potter didn't seem very open to Mr. Weasley and in cases like this it is always best to use someone who already knows the patient. In Mr. Potter's case, it would be best to use Miss Weasley. I've thought about it all the way up to your office Albus and I am convinced that she will give Mr. Potter the highest chances for a full recovery."
"Wait a minute, you still haven't told us how Harry will get better!" A weeping Hermione interjected. "And why is it Ginny instead of Ron and myself! We're his best friends!"
"Exactly, Miss Granger, you and Mr. Weasley will try to push him into being the Harry that you remember. That Harry is gone forever, he will never come back." Poppy paused as she saw the devastating effect of her words on the pair. "I know the two of you love him and want what is best for him that is why things must be this way. Miss Weasley will be able to give him the help and support he needs while at the same time giving him the space he needs to figure out who he is."
Albus looked at Ginny over his half moon spectacles, "I am afraid that Harry has never really had a chance to figure out who his is. He was a freak to his relatives and the boy-who-lived to us. He needs to decide who he is as a person and where he is to go from here." Albus leaned forward, "He will need your help."
Ginny just sat there looking intimidated. How on earth was she supposed to do this? She was Ginny, just Ginny, nothing special. She looked over at her mother who was looking at her, a mother's love and pride evident in her eyes. Love, it destroyed Voldemort didn't it? It could bring Harry back to them; no it will bring Harry back to them.
"I'll do what ever it takes to help Harry through this." Ginny said her voice thick with determination. "I just don't know how."
"Love him Ginny," Arthur spoke up for the first time that night. "Prewett women have a very strong brand of love that can revitalize a man in many different ways, and you are your mother's daughter! I have faith in you, my beloved daughter." He looked over at his wife during the last bit and took her hand, brought it up to his lips and kissed it. The adoring look on their faces was enough to make their offspring gag.
"We'll help Ginny." Ron promised.
"We'll all help." Swore Mr. and Mrs. Weasley together. Then everyone in the room raised their wands and swore a wizard's oath that they would not rest until Harry was better.