-- Disclaimer: I don't own Brokeback Mountain or it's characters. Nor do I own the song used here, it belongs to Keith Urban. --
-- Just a semi-short songfic about everyone's favorite cowboys, Jack and Ennis. Ennis is still a little touchy on how their relationship is going but Jack finds a way to turn that all around with a very small yet meaningful gesture. Thanks for reading and please review to tell me what you think! --
Trust Me
"I don' know if I c'n do this Jack..."
Ennis mumbled quietly as he lay on his back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling in thought. Jack, who had been laying next to him for some time now, sat up and looked down at his mate with a questioning look.
"Wha' ya mean cowboy? Cain't do wha'?"
"This whole thing... Us livin' up here together... I's still so unsafe for both of us..."
Jack sighed softly next to him and leaned back against the headboard.
"This bout tha' shit tha' happened with your father again?"
He asked and Ennis turned his head to look out the window at the moonlight outside, guilt and pain lacing his voice when he spoke again.
"I cain't help it Jack... You know tha'..."
"I know Ennis but ya jus'... Ya gotta know tha' no one here c'n do tha' ta us all the way up here. Trust me on this, a'right?"
Ennis remained silent as he stared out the window and Jack sighed softly again before climbing out of bed slowly.
"I'ma get some whiskey or somethin'... Ya wan' any?"
"I'll share..."
Came the quiet reply and Jack left the room slowly, heading down the stairs to the kitchen. He turned on the radio as he plopped down at the kitchen table to think and stared at it sadly. What was Ennis' problem anyway? He knew he'd had a really bad experience when he was little about that whole thing with the gay guy getting dragged around by his... Well... Jack didn't really like to think about it. He shuddered slightly and turned the radio up a little.
Sometimes at night as he lay in bed with Ennis, it felt almost as painful as if he weren't even there with how distant he seemed most of the time. He was still so uncomfortable with it and though Jack knew why, it didn't make it hurt any less. He didn't want to tell Ennis though, for fear of hurting his mate and/or ruining what little relationship they had.
A new song came on the radio as he came out of his thoughts and by the first couple lines, he was mesmerizied. It spoke so truly of what he felt for Ennis that he quickly grabbed a paper and pen as a thought raced into his mind and began jotting down the lyrics, missing some as he tried to keep up but hell, he got what mattered. Once the song was over and he'd gotten all the lyrics he could, he got another piece of paper and re-wrote the lyrics more clearly, signing his name at the bottom before folding it and grabbing a bottle of whiskey off the shelf as he headed back upstairs.
He sat back down by Ennis, who was still staring out the window and took a swig of the whiskey before tapping the other on the shoulder to offer him some.
"Ya wan' some?"
Ennis nodded as he took the bottle and drank some before handing it back, trying not to meet Jack's eyes.
"Wha' took ya so long down there?"
He mumbled softly as Jack took another drink.
"Was gettin' somethin' I wanted you ta see."
He handed Ennis the paper, which he brought close to his face so he could read in the considerable darkness as Jack settled back against the headboard again with his whiskey. The look of confusion that had been on Ennis' face disappeared slowly and soon turned to happy tears as he read the song whose lyrics were shooting straight from the page into his very heart.
I'm gonna be here for you baby
I'll be a man of my word
Speak the language in a voice that you have never heard
I wanna sleep with you forever
And I wanna die in your arms
In a cabin by a meadow where the wild bees swarm
And I'm gonna love you like nobody loves you
And I'll earn your trust making memories of us
"Jack..."
Ennis whispered and looked over at him but the other shook his head and motioned to the paper.
"Finish the song first..."
He stared at Jack for another moment then turned back to the paper and continued to read slowly, savouring every word as they continued to pull and tear at his heart.
We'll follow the rainbow
Wherever the four winds blow
And there'll be a new day
Comin' your way
I'm gonna be here for you from now on
This you know somehow
You've been stretched to the limits but it's alright now
And I'm gonna make you this promise
If there's life after this
I'm gonna be there to meet you with a warm, wet kiss
And I'm gonna love you like nobody loves you
And I'll earn your trust making memories of us
I'm gonna love you like nobody loves you
And I'll win your trust making memories of us
"Y...ya mean this rodeo?"
"Wouldn'a given it to ya otherwise cowboy..."
Ennis rolled over slowly and took the whiskey from the others hands then set it on the nightstand and pulled him into a tight hug which was promptly returned, accompanied by a soft kiss.
"I... I love you rodeo..."
He whispered in his ear and Jack smiled softly, hugging him a little tighter.
"I love you too cowboy... I love you too..."