The vampire that attacked Cordelia was the only demon she and Angel saw for virtually the rest of the night. Conversation between the two of them as they patrolled was sparse and very tense as Cordelia realized for the first time how distanced she had truly become from Angel since Buffy's arrival in LA. It wasn't entirely her fault, nor his. She didn't blame him for his feelings for her, much as she may have wanted to. Nor could she completely hate Buffy for the love she clearly still harboured for him. It was like asking the sun not to rise, or something equally as impossible.

Still, the longer Buffy stayed the more distant Angel had become and while she didn't blame him or Buffy for their feelings for one another, she did blame Buffy for the hurt those feelings were clearly causing Angel.

She felt like she could no longer sense him, as if Buffy had waltzed in and taken the innermost part of him and kept it for herself. Angel now smiled less, his old broodiness and pained demeanor returned to him almost like a mask he had left in the bottom of his closet for years, only wearing it in her presence. He had readily given Buffy his heart and received only pain in return, like some sort of twisted gift with purchase. She's feeling the same thing you know, Cordelia's mind told her. Inside she knew that along with Angel's pain came Buffy's. The two were connected like a compass, each leading back to the other, guiding and at the same time following one another in an endless circle.

Still, although Buffy had once been a large part of Cordelia's life, there had never been any real closeness between the two of them. Cordelia had liked her as much as her shallow self had been capable of such a thing. She had certainly respected her as well as the job she performed, but there had never been a strong bond extending beyond the expected loyalty her office commanded and half hearted friendship.

Cordelia loved Angel though. She wasn't sure if it was with the same strength that Buffy loved him although part of her doubted it, but she did love him. Angel was the first real close friend that she had ever had. Angel was the first person to really see past the shallow Queen C persona she had adopted and bring out the person she was now. Angel was the only one who ever really knew what she was thinking, what she was feeling. The only one who had ever even come close had been Xander, but even then they had both been too young and immature for that bond to be fully realized.

Angel was her strength though, and now he was crumbling before her and she was unable to save him. She felt helpless and angry at the same time.

"What are you thinking?" Angel's soft subdued voice broke through her thoughts, causing her to nearly jump. She shrugged and looked over at him, trying to keep her thoughts off her face. He could read people so easily, especially her.

"I'm thinking I'll be happy when this is all over." She answered truthfully.

"Cordelia it's not Buffy's..."

"I know," she interrupted with a sigh. "I know Angel, I'm not blaming her. I just don't like to see you hurting, for any reason. And I know that when she's here, that's what always ends up happening. I'm not passing judgment. I just want to stop this guy so that things can go back to normal. Or whatever passes for normal in this town I guess."

"I don't know if they can," Angel told her honestly. "Every time we say good bye to each other another part of me dies."

Cordelia looked away, hating to see the familiar look of anguish etched all through his perfect features. Angel took a half step towards her, concerned that he had said something wrong.

"I know that you and I have been...undefined for a long time Cordy," he hedged, not entirely sure where he was going with his words. "I'm...I'm sorry if any of this has hurt you in any way. It was never what I intended. You mean so much to me. More than you'll ever know."

"It's OK Angel," She said, turning back to him and feeling his words flood her with warmth. It was as if suddenly everything had become clear to her. No matter what happened with him and Buffy, no matter how much they loved each other, she too had a part of Angel's heart that was indeed hers and only hers and not even his love for Buffy, could come between that. The knowledge of that comforted her and allowed the first real smile to grace her features in a good long while. "You don't have to apologize to me. I understand. I do."

"You don't know how much that means to me." He said, his shoulders slumping gratefully. "I don't know what I would do if I lost you."

"Like you could get rid of me that easily." She joked, attempting to lighten the situation up. She grinned suddenly. "It's dead over here though. You want to head back to the hotel and call Gunn? See if he had any luck?"

"Yea," he replied with a nod. "We're not getting anywhere here."

But as they turned back and headed in the direction of the hotel, Cordelia smiled, knowing he was wrong. They had indeed gotten somewhere tonight, even if he himself did not realize it and it was a place that Cordelia wouldn't trade for anything.