The Hitchhiker's guide to the Galaxy is known far and wide for its completeness of its knowledge of the times. The times, however, ten—

Wait, we've heard this before. What are you?

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the galaxy defines itself as a very near-complete compilation of anything and everything a galactic hitchhiker would need to know. And some things they wouldn't.

Any entries on God in there? Or maybe a lack thereof? Because, you know, that last entry had little or nothing to do with the physicist's struggle with society and society's struggle with the existence and/or qualities of a god.

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy was made and edited with the idea in mind of completely ignoring the philosophical struggles with God whenever possible. It's just tiresome. However, God is still mentioned several times. The Babel fish, for example…

Yes, I know of the Babel fish. It mentions God, but is there no explicit entry on him? Or Him?

The Hitchhiker's…

You can just call it 'the Guide'…

…Guide to the Galaxy thinks you should drop the subject. First of all, god or God was insignificant to the central theme in the previous entry. Second of all, a galactic hitchhiker doesn't need to know anything about God.

Oh, I don't know… what if there was a society on some planet that required a potential hitchhiker to be knowledgeable about God or be executed, or something?

No such religious societies exist in the galaxy.

Are there any predominantly religious societies at all?

None whatsoever.

So the entire galaxy is atheist?

All, except for the Kieqyens of Pokleran IV. They worship a pencil.

…That… that figures…

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the galaxy defines God as a mostly harmless… waste of time. An intelligent being as yourself should, and, it is assumed, does, know this.

That's terrible, though… is there no faith?

Who has faith?

I would ask the people of Earth. But you can't… they're all dead.

Earth was the last God-worshipping planet in the galaxy. And even that was kind of half-and-half.

How convenient…so God… is dead?

God was never alive.

You don't know everything, you've been wrong before. You're a book, a database, albeit an intelligent one… and since you're intelligent, you're subject to bias.

Less so than you.

I still think you're wrong. The galaxy is too big. Even if a religious… faithful… even if a society doesn't exist, you don't know God actually doesn't.

Are you suggesting I prove a negative?

That… that's not scientifically valid, is it?

Clearly.

But it's the only way to quell a faith. How true. Ironic, isn't it, the only way to disprove a faith in something is to scientifically prove the negative, which isn't valid. Or mostly invalid.

It's been done before.

Faith still exists.

Where?

It did in Earth.

Earth no longer exists.

No thanks to scientific negative proof! It was blown up, not enlightened!

Some would say that's the same thing.

I still think faith exists.

Where?

I… don't know. You're the galactic database. But you've been wrong.

Do you have faith?

If I did, you couldn't stop it.

But you don't.

You don't know that.

Neither do you.

- - -

You can kill the idea of God, but you can't kill faith in others. If you have faith, then the idea of God exists in you. If the idea of God exists in you, then God exists.

What a remarkably stalemated system!

- - -

What of the very important and relevant idea of an afterlife?

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy defines the afterlife as a myth created by religious societies of old in order to exploit the masses for profit.

Life itself is too important for "afterlife" nonsense. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy prides itself in finding life's ironies for humor and amusement.

Do you know there's not an afterlife?

No.

Then if there is, the galaxy could very well be in a particularly bad spot.

True. But, it's time to wake up, Waet.

What…?