AN: Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia, Poptarts, and other brand name stuffs.
Plans
Our heroes were on Derris-Kharlan chillin' out, maxin', relaxin all cool,
when Yuan burst in.
"Omg! You guys are so bored" Yuan blurted.
"That's the statement of the year" Kratos said.
"Translation?" Lloyd asked.
"No duh" Genis replied.
"How about a trip to Earth?" Yuan blurted.
"You where just waiting to say that" Kratos said crossly.
I Just Wanna Live
I need an
alarm system in my house
So I know when people are
Creepin about
These people are
Freakin me out
(these days)
It's getting hectic everywhere that I go
They won't leave me alone
There's things they all wanna know
I'm paranoid of all the people I meet
Why are they talking to me?
And why can't anyone see?
I just wanna live
Don't really care about the things that they say
Don't really care about what happens to me
I just wanna live
Just wanna live
Just wanna live
Just wanna live
Just wanna live
I rock a
Law suit
When I'm going to court
A white suit
When I'm getting divorced
A black suit
at the funeral home
and my birthday suit
When I'm home alone
Talking on the phone
Got an interview
With the Rolling Stone
They're sayin
"Now your rich and
Now your famous"
Fake ass girls all know your name and--
Lifestyles of the rich and famous
Your first hit are you ashamed
Of the life
Of the life
Of the life your living?
I just wanna live
Don't really care about the things that they say
Don't really care about what happens to me
I just wanna live
Stop your messing around boy
Better think of your future
"Better make some good plans boy" Said every one of my teachers
Look out
You better play it safe
You never know what hard times will come your way
We say
Where we're coming from
We've already seen the worst that this life can bring
Now we expect it everywhere that we go
All the things that they say
Yeah we already know
I just wanna live
Don't really care about the things that they say
Don't really care about what happens to me
Just wanna live
Just wanna live
Just wanna live
I just wanna live
Just wanna live
Just wanna live
Just wanna live
I just wanna live
Just wanna live
Just wanna live
Just wanna live
Don't really care about the things that they say
Just wanna live
Just wanna live
Just wanna live
Don't really care about what happens to me
I just wanna live
Welcome Back to Earth
Our heroes were teleported to Earth. They checked themselves to make sure that they didn't get discombobulated (I like that word…bob). Everyone was fine apart from Kratos who was turned into an adorable little puppy.
"- IT'S A GOLDEN RETREIVER!" Colette blurted as she picked up Kratos.
"Put me down" Kratos said. Since he can't talk, he thinks, even though it doesn't affect anyone.
"Poor Dad. Now what do we do?" Lloyd commented.
"We find out where we are and find a place to stay" Raine said.
Somehow, someway our heroes found a place to stay while in their new location. San Diego, California.
"It could be worse" Colette said.
"We could be in Alaska" Genis said.
"I still don't find shorts very comfortable" Raine said.
"I think you like fine" Zelos said as he popped out of nowhere.
After being bitch-slapped
"Come Kratos" Raine said.
Raine picked up Kratos and put him on a leash. Kratos glared at Zelos before following. While the two were out Raine decided to go buy a map of America and of food. Kratos was waiting outside when he found a cat. Kratos twitched.
"Must…not…GO AFTER KITTY!" Kratos blurted in thought.
Kratos somehow removed himself from his post and chased after the cat.
Pokemon
After the cat chase Kratos looked around to find that he was completely lost.
"Aw crap" Kratos thought.
The sounds of loud meowing was heard. Kratos turned to find a mini army of REALLY PISSED OFF CATS!.
"AW, SON OF A BCH!" Kratos said.
Kratos ran like there was no tomorrow. He rushed through the streets and after quick turns and jumps Kratos lost the cats. Kratos sniffed in the air and found the scent of Colette. He jumped a fence and jumped on his newly found comrade.
"Ooh, a puppy. I'll name you Pokemon" Colette said.
"You dumb blonde! How can you not remember me!" Kratos blurted. (I know he can't speak but he's thinking).
"I'll take you home and dress you like a princess then like a Pikachu" Colette rambled.
"00" was Kratos' reply.
"- Pokemon -" was Colette's reply.
While at home Kratos was dressed as Pikachu Kratos spotted Raine and made a run for her.
"Pokemon! Come back!" Colette cried.
"Colette what's going on? Kratos!" Raine exclaimed, "- I thought I lost you"
"I thought I lost you too. I love you so much! You never know how much you miss something until you run into Colette" Kratos said.
"Bark-bark! Bark-bark! Bark-bark-bark!" was all that Raine was hearing.
"Now what in Symphonia are you wearing?" Raine said.
"What are you doing with Pokemon!" Colette blurted.
"Genis! Get Teddy" Raine blurted.
"Look Colette, a teddy bear" Genis said.
"Oh! It's smells like faints" was Colette's reply.
"God, she's dumb. Always falling for the chloroform teddy bear" Genis commented.
"Why do you care about that stupid dog?" Zelos commented.
"You're just jealous because I'm kicking your ass in popularity" Kratos said.
"Bark! Bark-bark-bark! growling Bark!" was what everyone was hearing.
"Stupid mutt" Zelos commented.
"I don't think Dad will be happy when he's turned back to normal" Lloyd commented.
"It's time for dinner" Presea said.
"Yeah, so quit pissing Kratos off" Sheena said as she grabbed Zelos' ear.
Who we gonna call?
The next morning while everyone was at the beach Zelos was stuck with the job of calling Yuan to help Kratos.
"To cure Kratos you need to use the Unicorn Horn" Yuan replied.
"I see, if I don't use the horn then?" Zelos asked.
"He'll just stay that way. This can be reversed anytime" Yuan replied.
"Thanks" Zelos said.
Zelos got up and smirked at Kratos. He reached for him but Kratos bit his hand and jumped out of the window.
"I have to get to Raine or I'll be tormented by Zelos" Kratos said.
Kratos sniffed in the air and was smacked by the strong scent of Lloyd.
"This might be the only time where I'm grateful that Lloyd doesn't bathe" Kratos said.
"Come back here mutt!" Zelos blurted.
Kratos kept on running.
"Why do I always end up running?" Kratos said.
Kratos ran through the streets and finally made it to the beach.
"Hey! No dogs!" some guy blurted.
The guy also started to chase Kratos. So Kratos did what he could, he took a sharp turn and they missed him. Kratos eventually found Raine. He picked up a stick and wrote in the sand. Raine's eyebrow rose.
"U N I C O R N H O R N" Kratos wrote.
"What is it? Wait a minute, the cure" Raine blurted.
"BARK!" was Kratos' reply. Translation: Damn straight!
"Now where the hell did I put that thing" Raine asked.
While Raine was searching through her bag Zelos came over. Kratos growled and jumped on Zelos' face.
"Ah! Not the face" Zelos blurted.
Now image Raine searching through her back and Zelos getting beat up by a golden retriever puppy in the background. As soon as Zelos was beat up Raine was done and Kratos was healed.
"Alright! I'm back to normal!" Kratos blurted.
"Wow…luckily the horn gave him clothes too" Lloyd said.
"This is so unfair" Zelos blurted.
"That he has clothes?" Lloyd asked.
"You are so stupid" Zelos commented.
No English
Genis was bored so he decided to act like as if he didn't know English. He left his room where he started off at Raine.
"Genis, did you clean up your room?" Raine asked.
"Me speak-a no English" Genis said.
"We've lived together for how long?" Raine asked.
"I like this game" Genis said, "g.g (puppy eyes)"
"Fine, go and play…try it on Lloyd" Raine said.
"Yay!" Genis said.
Genis went to Lloyd's house.
"Hey Genis" Lloyd said.
"Me speak-a no English" Genis said.
"Oh sorry…uh Yo quero Taco Bell. Soy un perro caliente apestado" Lloyd said.
"Lloyd! You said, I want Taco Bell. I am a stinky hotdog" Kratos said.
"Oh…I guess I'm a bit rusty on my Spanish" Lloyd said.
"sigh of frustration" was Kratos' reply.
Lloyd and Genis left the house and decided to play the No English game. While Kratos and Raine followed just in case. They went over to Colette's house.
"Oh, hi guys! I had a dream about monkey talking to me XD" Colette said.
"We speak-a no English" Genis and Lloyd said together.
"XD Soñé con mono que habla conmigo. Bien fui al paseo y yo era tan feliz de encontrar este suéter rosa nuevo por esta fecha mí y Lloyd sale en y entonces compré algunas galletas I had a dream about a monkey talking to me! Well I went to the mall and I was so happy to find this new pink sweater for this date me and Lloyd are going out on and then I bought some cookies :D" Colette said in Spanish.
"0.0!" were Lloyd's and Genis' reaction.
"--'" was Kratos' reaction. Raine smirked.
"-" was Colette reply, "Por qué es usted confundió? Why are you confused?"
"Ellos juegan el juego Ningún-inglés donde ellos fingen que ellos ahora español y la prueba para ver las reacciones. Ellos no hallazgo más largo este chistoso They're playing the No-English game where they pretend that they now Spanish and try to see reactions. They no longer find this funny" Kratos replied.
"Lloyd tonto Silly Lloyd" Colette said.
"Genis era tonto también Genis was silly too" Raine added.
"What's going on?" Genis whispered.
"I don't know, let's just flee" Lloyd whispered back.
Genis and Lloyd crawled away while their friends spoke Spanish. The two friend walked around wondering what to do now that they were separated from their friends. As they were walking around they ran into Zelos unconscious.
Lloyd arrived home from school.
"How was school?" Kratos asked.
"Horrible! When me... being like the man, as so I ate this pie, that was the apple pie. This he of the surface which that we want, thought my pie which my crayon steals and therefore I so it strikes is liked person. I recovered my pie." Lloyd said.
Kratos stared in complete confusion.
"In English?" Kratos asked.
"I was eating pie when this guy who stole my crayon earlier that day took my pie so I kicked his sorry ass and got my pie" Lloyd said.
"Lloyd, I'm sorry to say this but you're an idiot" Kratos said.
"That's what Genis said to Colette! Wow, it must be contagious!" Lloyd said.
"Nope. I've still got my brain, where's yours" Kratos said.
"Omg! Where'd mine go!" Lloyd said as he ran out.
Noishe
It was Saturday. Lloyd came downstairs tiredly and into the kitchen. He went over to the cupboard and took out some pop-tarts. Kratos had just walked in, he smirked.
"Lloyd, Noishe ran away again so it's your job to wash him" Kratos ordered.
"What? Why?" Lloyd asked.
"You forgot to close the pen" Kratos said.
"Can I at least finish my coffee?" Lloyd asked.
"Sure" Kratos said in a unemotional tone.
"Aw, crap" Lloyd said.
Lloyd walked outside to find a familiar mud-dog. Lloyd was confused.
"Dad! Where's Noishe?" Lloyd hollered.
"Are you a freaking moron! He's the dog covered in mud!" Kratos yelled.
"Oh I see" Lloyd said.
"WHIIINNE!" Noishe replied.
"Alright! Noishe, get in the water!" Lloyd ordered.
"…" was Noishe's reaction.
"Alrighty then…Noishe, stay!" Lloyd ordered.
"…" was Noishe's reaction.
"Good dog" Lloyd said.
"God dammit! Put him in the water yourself" Kratos said, scaring Lloyd.
"Ah! How long have you been there?" Lloyd blurted.
"Long enough. I have an idea" Kratos said.
Kratos pulled out a dog biscuit and threw it in the pool. Noishe jumped in instantly and as Lloyd got soaked, Kratos used Guardian (smart idea).
"See ya, I have to pick up Raine from cooking class and Genis from Presea's house" Kratos said as he walked off.
Kratos got in his hover car and drove off. Lloyd turned his head and looked at Noishe's empty-minded blank face. Lloyd got to work.
By the time Kratos came back Lloyd was covered in soapy water and foam and Noishe was dry.
"Good, clean yourself up. Genis, walk Noishe" Kratos ordered.
"Fine" Genis sighed.
As Genis was putting the leash on Noishe, everyone went inside. As soon as everyone was gone Genis was done. Noishe started running and the leash was freely following. Genis forgot to push the restrict button to stop the leash line from extending.
"I wonder what this button does. I should've paid attention to Kratos" Genis said.
Genis pushed the button and immediately was dragged off by Noishe.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Genis yelled.
While Genis was flying by, he was about to fly by Zelos. Genis smirked and as soon as he passed by the red-headed Chosen he dragged him along too.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Zelos screamed girlishly.
"Wow, you can sure scream" Genis commented.
"I want my MOMMY!" Zelos cried. Genis rolled his eyes.
Passing by was Colette who Zelos brought along on the ride.
"WEEE THIS IS FUN!" Colette blurted.
"You're insane" Zelos blurted.
Noishe stopped on a dime and everyone immediately hit the floor. Noishe was hanging around with some female dog.
"Alright, we'll jump the dog" Genis said.
The three were slowly walking over to Noishe and retracting the leash when the Arshis spotted a squirrel and chased after it. While in the chase Presea was walking to Genis when she spotted the chase. Suddenly, for some reason Presea was in a cowgirl costume and she jumped on Noishe's back.
"YEEE-HAA!" Presea blurted.
Noishe eventually ran past Kratos' place. Kratos walked outside.
"Noishe! Dinner" Kratos said.
Noishe stopped on a dime and once again our dragged out heroes fell to the ground. Kratos unleashed Noishe and the Arshis ran off to his pen. Kratos looked at his comrades.
"You guys look like hell" Kratos commented.
"We know" Genis muttered. Zelos passed out and Colette smiled.
Everyone went into the house.
"Me and Raine are going grocery shopping, savvy?" Kratos said.
"Yes" they all said.
"Can I come!" Zelos blurted.
"No" Raine blurted.
"T-T" was Zelos' reaction.
Kratos and Raine left.
Poor Man Sickened
Kratos and Raine were just picking up a few things.
"What does the list say?" Raine asked.
"Forget the list. It all says chips" Kratos said.
He was right. The word "CHOCOLATE" was written in different hand writing.
"Right well you better at least get chocolate" Raine said.
"I bet you took part in this list too" Kratos said.
"What about you!" Raine exclaimed.
"Nope" Kratos said.
"Fine, whatever. Get the chocolate and Maxi Pads" Raine said.
Kratos was just about to leave when he abruptly stopped. He quickly turned to Raine and twitched.
"Grow up! What about Anna!" Raine blurted.
"She bought them herself! I took care of Lloyd!" Kratos blurted.
"You'll find a way" Raine said.
Kratos walked around and around the corner they were. Practically a whole walls worth. He gulped and turned green, slightly. Kratos took a huge step back and had a running start. He zoomed right past the aisle grabbing what Raine needed and soap. He went back to his cart and dropped them in. Kratos started freaking out like as if he had cooties and wiped his hands on whatever. Raine rolled her eyes.
"You're 4030 and you can't do this!" Raine exclaimed.
"Call me a coward if you want, but I stand by what I did" Kratos said.
"You're a coward" Raine said in a monotone voice.
"Geez, you don't have to be so harsh" Kratos said.
"Can we continue?" Raine surrendered.
"Sure" Kratos said calmly.
Raine sighed and the two continued.
Zelos
Eventually our grocery-buying heroes were done.
"Look, we bought mango" Kratos said.
"Alright!" Lloyd and Genis blurted.
"Talkin about fruit! Nice melons, Raine" Zelos said slyly.
"Nice black eye, Zelos" Raine said.
"What black eye?" Zelos asked.
Zelos get punched right in the eye by Kratos
"Not again" Zelos whimpered, "It's my birthday"
"It's not your birthday" Genis said.
Zelos pops up
"But it will be tomorrow!" Zelos blurted.
"We should have a party!" Colette blurted.
"I am and you're all being forced to come" Zelos said.
"What if we don't wanna?" Genis asked suspiciously.
"I will cry, follow you guys while crying, and cry while clinging onto Lloyd" Zelos said.
"YOU ARE EVIL!" Lloyd blurted.
"Here are you invitations" Zelos said.
Dear Bumpkins,
Meaning: Sheena, Raine, Lloyd, Twerp…Genis, Presea, SOB…Kratos and everyone else. I am inviting you to the ZELLYBEAN BIRTHDAY BOY BASH! Not formal at all! Heck it's a freaking pool party! He-he bikinis, he-he Raine in one. Be there or I drown you in my misery.
Luv ya,
Zelos a.k.a. ZellyBean
"Are you going to be wearing that Speedo again?" Raine asked disgustedly.
"Absolutely, are you excited" Zelos asked slyly.
Kratos punched Zelos again and he fell to the floor.
"My dad punches hard" Lloyd commented.
"…Yeah" Genis replied.
"No wonder Raine likes him -" Colette said.
"gg Colette, you should really keep your mouth shut" Raine said.
Remember: g-g means puppy face and gg or g.g means blushing
THE ZELLYBEAN BIRTHDAY BOY BASH!
The next day everyone was dressed up for Zelos' party. When they arrived the first thing on the to-do list was to open gifts. No surprise there.
Kratos – a sword
Raine – a new comb
Genis – a picture of his ass so Zelos could kiss it
Presea – a shield
Lloyd – a stuffed Lloyd toy
Colette – an Easy Bake Oven
Sheena – swimming trunks, for god sakes
Regal – a PSP
Yuan – a kilt!
"I love this!" Zelos blurted.
"Can we swim now?" Colette asked.
"Sure" Zelos said.
"Lloyd beat us to it" Sheena commented.
Lloyd was already swimming around and everyone else joined in. Raine stayed as far away from the pool as possible. She took a seat and started reading. Kratos came out of the pool and walked over.
"Didn't I teach you how to swim?" Kratos asked.
"Yes, but I prefer to read" Raine said.
"You'll get over heated" Kratos said.
"Alright already I'll go, sheesh" Raine said.
Raine took off that sash/towel/skirt/bikini skirt and Kratos' jaw dropped. It was just her normal top but boy-short bottoms.
"-- Don't stare" Raine said.
"0.0!" was Kratos' reaction.
Raine shrugged and went on ahead but she had to go back and drag Kratos with her since he was still staring.
"Geez, you're bring such a Zelos" Raine said.
" I'm trying not to" Kratos said through clenched teeth.
"ULTRA COOL GORGEOUS BEAUTY!" Zelos said.
Zelos' face met Raine's fist and he fell back into the pool.
Perfect
Later that day the party was over. Sheena, Lloyd, Colette, Genis, Presea, and Zelos stayed at Zelos' place for a while. Regal, Raine, and Kratos went home.
Genis came home. He was going to ask Kratos and Raine if they would come to Altamira tomorrow. Being stupid, he just walked in to find Kratos and Raine kissing. Raine pushed Kratos away.
"gasp Kratos! How dare you hit on me!" Raine blurted.
"I regret nothing" Kratos said.
"I was going to ask if you guys would wanna go to Altamira with us" Genis said.
"Of course we'll go" Raine said cheerfully.
"I don't really wanna" Kratos said.
"That's not a yes and it's not a no, so I choose" Raine said, "Yes"
"Yay!" Genis said.
Genis ran out. Kratos closed the door.
"Wow, practice does pay perfect" Kratos said.
"C'mere you" Raine said giving Kratos a hug.
"Ah! The hugs, they burrrrrrrrn!" Kratos said.
Altamira
"So we'll go on this ride and this ride and this ride and--" Lloyd said.
"Lloyd! We'll just go on all the rides we can" Genis blurted.
"Oh…that works too" Lloyd said.
"TO THE TUNNEL OF LOVE! X3" Zelos blurted.
"I don't wanna go" Sheena said.
"Too late!" Colette said as she grabbed Lloyd's arm.
"I need that arm to fight and stuffs" Lloyd said.
"P-P-Presea, you wanna go w-w-with me?" Genis stuttered.
"I understand…let's go" Presea said.
"I'LL GO TOO!" Regal blurted.
"Wow, he's usually quiet" Raine whispered.
"He really doesn't like the Genis/Presea pairing" Kratos replied.
"Let's go already!" Zelos blurted.
So everyone continued.
"I don't want to go" Raine said.
"Why?" Zelos asked sadly.
"Raine's terrified of water" Genis blurted, receiving a hit.
"I'm not terrified I'm just uncomfortable" Raine said.
"Too late!" Colette said.
Before anyone knew it, Colette had forced everyone onto a boat in pairs. Who knew she had it in her.
"……HEY! ZELOS DON'T TOUCH ME!" Sheena blurted.
"I must've slipped out something" Zelos said mockingly.
"Sometimes, I wish you were gay" Sheena muttered.
"You don't mean that hunny" Zelos said giving Sheena a hug.
"I give up" Sheena said.
"So I can touch your butt?" Zelos asked, ":3"
"No!" Sheena blurted.
Meanwhile with Genis and Presea…and Regal.
"You're touching me hand" Presea said.
"Sorry, P-P-Presea" Genis said.
"Please don't touch the package" Regal said.
Presea turned to find Regal wearing a suit that was JUST like the ones that those evil morphing guys on the Matrix wore…only black. Presea twitched.
Lloyd and Colette were talking about ice cream flavours when suddenly they heard a loud splash ahead of them. As their boat passed by they found Regal floating and unconscious with swirls in his eyes.
"" was Regal's expression.
"Silly Regal, this is no place for swimming" Colette commented.
"I don't think he had a choice" Lloyd replied.
A Need To Live
Kratos and Raine were in the boat. They were almost to the end and Kratos looked into the end of tunnel. The light was almost blinding. It reminded him of Welgaia.
Flashback
Kratos appeared from the transporter and started roaming. Every angel had a blank face of emotionless expressions that was kinda creepy. The starry night sky could be seen from the glass dome around the 'city' (more like hell hole) which was the only amusing thing...other than computer games and messing with the robots' heads.
The angels have lost their souls...weirdos. All they ever spoke of was their 'savior' Mithos Yggdrasill. It was absolutely dull. The only alive person was Yuan, who when not plotting was partying with the Renegades… and getting completely wasted in the progress.
To be trapped in a mute dome for eternity without a soul…sweet lord of mercy.
End Flashback
Kratos shuddered and Raine took notice. As soon as the two got off the ride Kratos gave Raine a hug.
"And to think I wanted to die" Kratos said.
"Are you okay?" Raine asked. Kratos let go.
"Absolutely. Let's go for a ride and get something to drink" Kratos said.
"Coffee?" Raine asked.
"No, I want some Sprite Remix" Kratos said.
"Are you okay? Are you having a mid-life crisis?" Raine asked.
"sigh No" Kratos said, sounding like a frustrated teen.
"Okay then, but not too much sugar. You know how you get" Raine said, trying to keep a straight face.
"Not funny" Kratos said. Raine giggled.
Moments later had the rest of the comrades come apart from Regal.
"Where's Regal?" Raine asked.
"Presea threw him off the boat! :D" Genis blurted joyfully.
"I'm here" Regal said panting.
"Alright, to a ride" Kratos said as he walked off.
"What's with Dad?" Lloyd asked.
"Mid-life crisis, he won't admit it" Raine whispered.
"I heard that" Kratos said.
Sleep
That night our heroes stayed at the hotel (Pairs on hotel rooms: Sheelos, Colloyd, Gesea, Kraine and Regal).
"Why was a stuck with Zelos?" Sheena muttered.
"We're the kids in America! Wo-oh! We're the kids in America! Wo-oh! Everybody live for the music-go-round!" Zelos sang.
"Just great, he's tone deaf and he sings in the shower" Sheena said.
Sheena smirked and she kept a tape recorder near the bathroom. As soon as Zelos stopped singing and the water stopped, Sheena announced that she was leaving and she dashed off. Zelos walked out of the bathroom to see an empty tape recorder. Zelos stared until he understood what was going on.
"LUSCIOUS HUNNY, NO!" Zelos hollered.
Sheena giggled as she hid around the corner.
Meanwhile Lloyd and Colette were playing in a racing game. Lloyd was just about to reach the finished line when he was blown up.
"YES! I WIN! WHO-DA CHOSEN!" Colette blurted.
"0.0!" was Lloyd's reaction.
"- Sorry" Colette said in her normal tone.
"Best two outta three" Lloyd said.
"You're on! I'll wipe da floor wit ya!" Colette said.
"o0?" was Lloyd's reaction.
" Nothing personal I just wanna kick your butt" was Colette's reply.
"Creepy blonde" Lloyd thought.
Genis and Presea were preparing to go to bed. Presea was brushing her teeth while Genis started drawing.
"I will perfect my Princess Presea picture" Genis thought.
Presea looked around and she locked the bathroom door. She pulled out a blue print from the cup board to something she called "Operation Devastation". She smirked.
"Regal will never mess with me again" Presea muttered.
Knock, knock
"Presea, are you done yet?" Genis asked.
"Yeah, I'll be right out" Presea said.
Presea hid the blue print and smirked.
Raine was taking a shower and Kratos was in his bed trying to sleep and trying to ignore Zelos' whining outside.
"That's it, Violence Time" Kratos said as he walked out.
Kratos went outside and walked over to Zelos.
"God dammit, Zelos! Just shut up and put some clothes on!" Kratos yelled.
"But Sheena has a tape that has some very secretive things on it" Zelos whined.
"Sheena, don't use the tape unless something really stupid comes up" Kratos said.
Sheena comes from behind a corner
"You're no fun, but fine" Sheena pouted.
"There, now go to sleep" Kratos said.
Rocky 1-7
The next day our heroes were on their Rhieards flying in the sky and on their way to Luin to check how things were going.
"Genis, remember my pet rocks Rocky?" Lloyd asked.
"You mean the ones numbered 1-7 and then you dropped them one by one in the forest near the Tower of Salvation?" Genis replied.
"Of course! I wonder how they turned out" Lloyd said.
"Maybe they fell into a magical pond where mermaids praise the rocks because they killed an evil lord of their enchanted underwater city" Colette said.
"What have you been smoking?" Zelos asked.
"Maybe they fell on someone's head" Sheena commented.
"Wait, a bunch of rocks. Smallest to largest. Named Rocky 1-7?" Kratos asked.
"Yeah! Absolutely" Lloyd said.
Kratos flew over and whacked Lloyd upside the head.
"YOU MORON! I GOT HIT WITH THOSE ROCKS!" Kratos blurted.
Flashback
Kratos was on his way to the Tower of Salvation. It was going to be the final battle between Mithos and Lloyd plus Company. Kratos was in the forest and he looked around. There was a tree that said "LLOYD WAZ HERE". Kratos raised an eyebrow.
Kratos had almost made it out of the forest when a small rock hit his head. He looked up to find more rocks coming his way. Kratos was dodging them but they kept on coming. Eventually the biggest rock, marked "7" fell on Kratos head and Kratos fell to the ground.
"If I ever find the owner of these stupid rocks, I'll hurt them!" Kratos muttered.
End Flashback
"I was walking to the Tower of Salvation when your stupid rocks hit me!" Kratos said.
"I was once at a park wondering why Frisbees get bigger when they get closer, then it hit me" Lloyd commented.
Lloyd has earned another whack upside the head
"We're here" Colette said.
As our heroes landed the ground started shaking. Colette fell over on her butt, and everyone else started bracing themselves. Then it became silent.
"I'll go check things out" Lloyd said.
"Be careful" Colette hollered as Lloyd dashed off.
Lloyd ran off. Only moments later was he running back madly.
"RUN IF YOU WANT TO LIVE!" Lloyd blurted.
Everyone got up and started running, not knowing what they were running from.
"What are we running away from?" Genis asked.
"The Sheena Fujibayashi Fan Club!" Kratos blurted.
Everyone turned to find crowds of men…and some women (o.0?) chasing after our fleeing heroes.
"Can't we fly?" Lloyd asked.
"They have ways of following" Sheena blurted.
"WE LOVE YOU SHEENA!" the SFFC blurted.
"Genis, you and Zelos will use Thunder Blade whilst Colette and I use Judgment" Kratos ordered.
"THUNDER BLADE!" Zelos and Genis blurted.
"JUDGMENT!" Kratos and Colette blurted.
"Alright, they're unconscious!" Lloyd cheered.
"Let's get the Rhieards and leave this hell hole" Sheena blurted.
"Let's go to Asgard!" Raine said as he eyes changed.
When out heroes landed they went right for the hotel. After checking in our heroes went to bed/hung around.
"Where'd Raine go?" Genis asked.
"She and Linar went to check out some caves and the stars" Lloyd said carelessly.
"Why am I not surprised" Genis commented.
"Dunno, but Linar looked very happy to see Raine again" Lloyd said.
"He obviously likes her Lloyd" Colette blurted.
"I don't think Kratos will be too happy" Genis said.
"Don't worry, Dad will be fine. He's not that obsessive" Lloyd said.
"You sure? He's still trying to find out who shot him with the tomato catapult" Genis said.
"Now I remember! It was Zelos" Lloyd said.
"He's going to kill Zelos!" Colette blurted.
"I don't think Dad will do something like that" Lloyd said.
"Watch me" Kratos said in an angered voice.
The kids turned to find Kratos, practically red with anger.
"Where…is…Zelos" Kratos said through clenched teeth.
"In his room" Lloyd whimpered.
Kratos went back to the building and only moments later.
"OMG! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Zelos' girly voice.
"O.O" were the kids' replies.
Kratos came back dusting off his hands.
"The deed's been done" Kratos said, "Now for Linar"
Kratos walked around the city and eventually found the two.
"Just play it cool" Kratos thought.
"Omg, look at all these ruins!" Raine blurted.
"Maybe I should just let things go. I need some air" Kratos thought.
"Look Kratos! Diamonds!" Raine blurted.
"Interesting" Kratos said, "I'll be out for a while"
"Be careful, it's dark out there" Raine said.
Kratos walked off but before leaving he turned. Raine had her backed turned and Linar was waving. Kratos did some sign language saying "Choose you actions wisely" and he walked off.
A Deep Thought
Kratos walked around the forest (I'm sure that there's one near Asgard) and eventually met a clearing near a pond. Kratos sat down and looked up.
"I'm surprised I couldn't do it" Kratos said.
Flashback
Kratos walked into Raine's room.
"Uh Raine, I need to talk" Kratos started.
"Really, what is it?" Raine asked as she looked away from her book.
"Well……." Kratos said.
Kratos for some reason kissed Raine when that whole Genis-walks-in thing came along and the kiss was over.
End Flashback
Kratos shook his head.
"I am sure as hell not going back to that second moon I used to call a planet" Kratos said.
I am Kratos Aurion! I'm a freaking mercenary! Trained to be a fearless expert soldier paid to fight for an army other than that of his or her country and I am afraid of telling Raine…stuff….MARTEL DAMN IT! I CAN'T EVEN SAY THE MARTEL DAMN WORD! I've gotta stop getting angry at myself, it's not going to help. That's it, this is where I take my stand and say tell it to her straight.
The Island of Dreams
Our heroes decided to go one a boat trip. A simple boat trip on a boat that was a lot like Maxwell's. Everyone was enjoying the nice air and the calm sea, even Raine. The restful trip was cut short when the clouds became dark and the waves went insane.
"Dad…do purple lady eyes appear in the sky often?" Lloyd asked.
"Martel dammit, no!" Kratos blurted.
"PRETTY BOYS DIE YOUNG!" Zelos screamed.
"Welcome to the Land of Dreams" a voice said coming along with the eyes.
A huge tide washed over the boat and…
Raine snapped her eyes open and she sat up. The others were sleeping or unconscious apart from Zelos who had just vanished. Raine lay back down and stared into the sky. The beach sand was soft and the sun shone bright as the birds flew by.
Zelos was running around in circles freaking out. Suddenly he saw a turtle.
"Young Zelos" Turtle started.
"OMG A TURTLE IS TALKING TO ME!" Zelos blurted.
"Shut up you incompetent ass!" Turtle said.
"Sheesh. Harsh, much" Zelos commented.
"Everyone is asleep. Boys and girls a like" Turtle said with a wink.
"I get it" Zelos said, "Geez, I'm agreeing on dirty jokes with a turtle"
Zelos walked over to where the others were and he walked past Colette, Presea, and he stopped at Sheena.
"I think I'll give Sheena a rest and give Raine a chance" Zelos thought.
Zelos innocently walked over to Raine and 'accidentally' fell on her.
"Zelos get off!" Raine blurted.
Kratos suddenly awoke and his first action was punching Zelos right in the face, thus making it easier to roll him away. Kratos got up and started waking everyone else.
"Where are we?" Kratos asked.
"I don't know but I think it's pretty" Colette said.
"We should fly off of here" Lloyd said.
"You aren't leaving until I say so" a voice said.
"Who the hell are you?" Lloyd blurted.
"I am Tejuna. Welcome to my Island of Dreams" Tejuna said.
Suddenly a blue and purple smoke appeared and surrounded everyone.
Presea opened her eyes to find herself on the island, everyone was gone.
"I'm alone…again" Presea said.
"Everyone requested on you staying here alone" Tejuna said.
"They left" Presea said.
Presea was surrounded in a crystal but she didn't care, she felt alone.
"…No, they wouldn't! Not Genis! GENIS!" Presea blurted
"Yeah?" Genis asked.
"o.0? Where were you this whole time?" Presea asked.
"I was in a world where the Katz people were my family" Genis said, "I miss uncle Meowmix"
"o.0?" was Presea's reaction, "Let's get out of here"
Zelos opened his eyes to find everyone dressed as savages and him tied to a pole.
"Burn him" Genis blurted. Zelos screamed like a girl.
"MUHAHAHAHAAHAH!" Regal said.
Suddenly all he could here was Genis yelling curses at him and Zelos awoke.
"What just happened?" Zelos asked.
"You yelled "Back away you evil bumpkins' and then you screamed like a girl" Genis replied. Zelos glared.
"That was an interesting dream" Regal said.
"It was even more interesting to find you laughing like a madman" Genis added.
"Let us wake the others." Presea said.
Lloyd and Colette awoke to find that they were in Candy Land. They were dressed as Mario and Luigi (Lloyd as Mario and Colette as Luigi).
"Momma mia! What are we-a going to now?" Lloyd asked.
"I say-a that we-a go and have some of that-a candy, eh-a Lloyd?" Colette replied.
"Lloyd! Colette! Wake up!" Zelos yelled.
Lloyd and Colette sprung up and looked around.
"We're on a perilous journey to wake up the others" Zelos said proudly.
"Yay!" Colette blurted.
"Do we get candy" Lloyd said.
Sheena awoke to find that she was a princess.
"I look so fancy" Sheena commented.
"Mistress Sheena, your boyfriend is here" Turtle the butler said.
"Hi Sheena!" Zelos said.
Sheena screaming
"Sheena? Wake up!" Genis blurted.
"Wha? What's going on?" Sheena asked.
"We're waking up everyone and we found you screaming" Presea said.
"To waking the others"
Raine looked around her surroundings to find that she was in a nice meadow. The wind was calm and birds flew by and sang a sweet song. Kratos walked over.
"Hey Raine" Kratos said as he sat beside her.
"Where are we?" Raine asked.
"Our honeymoon, are you okay?" Kratos asked.
Raine blushed and she smiled nervously.
"Don't worry" Kratos said.
"Dad? Wake up" Lloyd said.
Kratos sprung up and looked around.
"What just happened?" Kratos asked.
"Nothing much. You were smiling in your sleep and Raine was blushing in her sleep. We have to wake her up though" Genis said.
"Wake up, professor" Presea said.
"What? What's going on?" Raine asked.
"We're trying to find a way out of here" Lloyd said.
"I say we fly out of this hell hole" Zelos blurted.
"No! You cannot leave! MUAHAHAHA!" Tejuna said.
"Jerk" Kratos said.
"You meanie!" Tejuna said before crying.
"Let's leave" Raine whispered.
The four angels (Kratos, Colette, Zelos, and Lloyd) sprouted their wings, picked up whoever and flew back to Meltokio.
"Martel dammit! I never want to go back on a boat ever!" Raine blurted.
"Would you rather fly?" Kratos asked.
"…Never mind what I said" Raine said as she turned away.
Now What?
Our heroes sat around Zelos' mansion wondering what movie to watch. Kratos knelt down and started searching through a cabinet for movies.
"I say that we watch horror" Zelos said.
"I'm not watching that kind of movie" Raine said sternly.
"What are you, scared?" Zelos teased.
Raine took a vase and threw it. Zelos dodged but it ended up hitting Kratos in the head and he passed out.
"O.O!" was Raine's reaction. Zelos burst out laughing until Sheena slapped him upside the head.
"You didn't have to hit so hard" Zelos said.
"Omg! Are you going to leave my Dad there?" Lloyd panicked.
"Of course not… Zelos and I will drag him to the couch" Raine said.
"What do you mean by 'Zelos and I'?" Zelos asked.
"Sorry, I meant just Zelos" Raine said with a smile.
"Aw man" Zelos said.
"The Matrix it is" Genis said.
everyone rambles agreements
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What happens in with the movie? Who knows.