Disclaimer – Not in this lifetime will I ever own the TMNT's. And where I believe I have only one life to live, that pretty much says what's not going to happen. Wendy Peabody owns Rahab, Seth, Gaele, Riahna, Devon, and Thomas – if he should ever show up. I own only Gabby, Mindy, and Jordan – and Jordy's stuffed tiger. :0)

A Time of Reflection

by reinbeauchaser

Chapter 4 – Unexpected Decisions

"Hey, morn'n Gabs!"

Gabriella silently groaned at the sound of Mike's cheerful voice. She had almost made it to the patio door without challenge, but it was obvious that 'almost' wasn't quite close enough.

Of course, Gabby half-expected Mike to confront her, what with Jordan's babbling, as she carried her infant son downstairs. Despite the fact the baby had a mouthful of tiger ear, he could be quite loud when he wanted to be.

Nevertheless, Gabby didn't want to seem unwelcoming to her uncle's good mood, so she took a deep breath and then forced a half smile before turning around. As soon as she saw her him, she knew Mike had been in the living room, considering he was coming from that direction. Rahab followed behind her husband, her robe wrapped around her, with a cup of hot coffee in hand. When she saw Gabby, she gave a warm, yet tentative smile.

With Jordan still gnawing on his stuffed toy and his attention now on his granduncle, Gabby remarked as casually and as pleasantly as she could, "I see you two are – ah - up early."

"Yeah, have been, for a while…" Mike replied easily as he walked up unhurried to his niece. He gave her a small smile, "But, then...you knew that all ready, didn't you?" Mike regarded Gabby for a moment and saw her mild surprise. He smirked knowingly, then widened his grin even more for Jordan. Sweetening his voice just a little, Mike singsonged, "Say, how's my boy Jorrrdy? Does he have his tiger," and then he lowered his voice, "Or does his tiger have him?" He chuckled when his nephew gave an equally wide, but almost toothless smile, babbling back in baby-speak, and for the moment forgetting about chewing on his toy.

Then, Mike looked at Gabriella and offered, "Say, why don't I give you a break, Gabs, and take my nephew for a while,"

Before Gabby could react, her uncle had Jordan in his arms so quickly it nearly stunned the girl.

"Mike, really, it's not necessary." Gabby managed to protest, reaching out in an attempt to retrieve her son back.

"Of course it's necessary," Mike countered, as he stepped away and kept Jordan from Gabby's reach, "I'm his granduncle, for cry'n out loud, and it's necessary for me to spoil him rotten." Jordan squealed in delight as Mike tickled him under his arms. "'Sides," Mike explained, his smile thinning a bit more, contradicting the lilt in his voice, "Your father's waiting for you."

The sudden change in Mike's demeanor didn't surprise Gabby as much as it disappointed her. She had hoped he would have been a counter measure for whatever awaited her the next day, the opposite to whoever was going to train her.

Then again, she reasoned, it was quite possible Mike might be the one doing the training.

Still, she tried to feign ignorance, "Um, where is he, out on the patio, maybe?" Gabby asked innocently. She turned her head slightly to glance through the glass door, as if looking – and hoping – to see her father outside.

Mike shook his head a little, his smile fading even more, now, "You've been living here for how many years and you still think you can spy without me noticing?"

Gabby turned back in mild surprise, "I – I wasn't spying on you, Mike; I was just – looking out my bedroom window…thinking. That's all," And then Gabby riled just a little, "Besides, I didn't think it was a crime to watch you water Riahna's flowers. Just because I was looking out the window at the same time you were on the patio…"

However, Mike cut her off with a stern look, narrowing his eyes some, "No, it's not a crime, Gabby, but I'd appreciate if you didn't treat me like I was a complete idiot, either!" He jerked a thumb towards the patio door and flattened his voice, "Raph's out in the forest by those trees where Seth likes to – pray." Then, Mike turned towards the family room, with Jordan secure in his arms, "And don't take your time about it, either. Your father is not a patient man."

As quickly as it had formed, Gabby felt her positive attitude dissipate. Still, she closed her eyes against her rising need to cry, as her previous sullen mood returned and all too soon for her liking. She felt hot tears well up behind her eyelids, but she fought them back and refused them release. When she opened her eyes again, she found Rahab by her side. Her mother-in-law offered Gabby a look of pity, as the girl complained, still mindful of keeping her voice low. "Seems I'm always screwing up."

Rahab opened her mouth to say something in response, but, instead, it was Mike's voice Gabby heard, as it filtered back from the family room, "Times a'wastin', Gabriella."

His wife could only shrug and pat Gabby's arm affectionately, "It'll be all right," she whispered, "Just try not to challenge them, okay?" She smiled a little and gave Gabby a peck on the cheek.

"I wasn't trying to," Gabby moaned, watching as Rahab headed off towards the family room to join her husband and grandson.

As she watched her leave, Gabby wished that she had just stayed in her room, rather than attempt to have one last, normal day.

"What was I thinking anyway?" she muttered bemusedly.

Gabby sighed, though, and realized that no matter who her sensei was going to be, both Mike and Raph would work as a team – and work against her, if need be. After all, it was how they were the last time she was in training.

In either event, she gave up the idea of having a normal day and turned towards the patio door. Hesitating just a little, she pushed her anger away, and finally jerked the door open. Gabby quickly slipped through the opening, though, before Mike could react, as she was sure he had sensed her gradually souring mood. However, rather than encourage any further confrontation, she closed the door as gently behind her as she could, where she doubted her uncle's current mood would allow her even a brief momentary temper-tantrum.

At least, not without a rebuttal anyway. She had learned long ago not to cross him when he was like this.

Now, Gabby stood there outside the house, her back to the glass door, as she faced the rear yard. For just a moment, she savored the warm air, with a hint of cool weather gracing its edges, as if bidding adieu to summer. Gabby saw the pool reflect the bright October sky and a few clouds drifting eastward from the Pacific not far away. As a gentle breeze traveled through the yard, it caused the top layer of water to ripple in its wake. It was very inviting.

Gabby could also see where Mike had watered, the walkway around the garden area still damp from where he had over sprayed.

However, for the moment, none of it mattered to Gabby. All she could think about was the forest. She stared up at the grandeur of the redwoods. She allowed her eyes to follow the majestic height of the trees, the way she had done while looking out her bedroom window. She looked back down at their base, again, and studied their darkened depths, wondering about her imagined fears. She swallowed once again and tried to remember what Leo had taught her about self-control.

"Breath deeply, my daughter," he had instructed, "allow the fear to surface, but then let it go, like letting air out of a balloon."

It seemed an easy task for her to do at the time. Yet, there in Japan, she didn't have any worries, as he imparted his wisdom to her in his meeting room, all safe and secure. It was easy to put into practice his advise and suggestions.

Now, however, Gabby was finding Leo's wisdom nearly impossible to practice. The memory of the fight so long ago, the battle that took place in the very forest in front of her, was still fresh in Gabriella's mind. Only a short while ago, in fact, she had recalled that very day, remembering all too well the details of that skirmish.

Consequently, Mike's order for her to meet with her father in the forest – and right on the very site where the battle had taken place – petrified her. It was almost as bad as her fear of the dark, when she first arrived five years earlier. Gabriella had overcome that phobia, of course, when Leonardo began training her shortly after she had settled in. That experience alone had been monumental for her. In fact, it had become the precursor to face many of her fears.

Nevertheless, what played through her mind, now, was the memory of her first battle, with the generous spill of blood, the gore, and the uncertainty if she would even survive.

At the time, Gabby didn't have a clue how well her family could fight, either – other than what she had seen on the DVD's Seth had loaned her. Ever since then, though, after watching them engage with a real enemy, parlaying each strike from them that took a skill only years of practice could perfect, all of it had haunted Gabby's dreams.

Then, Don's rescue in the Philippines, seeing Seth and the others so beaten up when they returned to the ryu in Japan, had only added to her inner turmoil.

Now, to have Mike ordering her into revisit the original site and birthplace of her fear almost debilitated Gabby. Her recent resolve to accept things the way they were, to cooperate as best she could, evaporated away. She felt pushed into another corner again, the way Leo had done weeks ago. Mike nudging her beyond her comfort zone, forcing Gabby to face something she herself didn't feel ready to deal with, angered her for a moment. Yet, she knew it was this same anger that had brought her to her current situation, and so she tried to shove it back down. As she did, an involuntary shudder swept over her, a sob forcing its way up through her throat, catching on her tongue as she fought to contain it.

Gabby then glanced up at her bedroom window and again wished that she had stayed in her room.

Yet she hadn't and now here she was, facing another fear, a new one borne of circumstances and events beyond her control! It seemed that others were once again, telling her how to behave, comparing her to how everyone else had recovered from the latest sortie, and expecting her to do the same.

"I'm not like them; I can't overcome everything," she grumped silently, "why can't they just leave it be and let me handle this on my own?"

However, the sound of someone tapping against glass disrupted her personal reflection. In reflex, Gabby turned around. She saw Mike on the other side of the patio door, a scowl on his face. The moment they locked eyes, he mouthed 'GO!' and pointed determinedly towards the forest, his finger rapping hard against the glass door.

Gabby gave a quick negative shake of her head. She was desperate for understanding as her eyes pleaded and filled with tears.

But Mike wouldn't have any of it. He slid the door open just a little, "No excuses, Gabby; go – now – or I'll make you."

Trembling from not only her burgeoning emotions, but from her fear as well, Gabby pleaded, "I can't, Mike, I can't go there, there's too many…too many things right now, too many memories, I – I can't…please…"

He wavered for only a moment, feeling Gabby's sincerity, her roiling internal struggle, but he had a job to do and it was important for his niece to follow through. Mike replied sensitively yet sternly, "Let's not repeat how things went when you first came here, okay? You're a mother, now, and you've defeated fears before." Gabby bowed her head as she failed to hold back the deluge, her tears flowing freely, now. Mike cringed a little, not really wanting to be this tough, but – well – Raphael was waiting and he could sense his brother's growing impatience. "Gabby," Mike insisted, as he opened the door a little more and stepped out, "you have to do this."

Sobbing quietly, Gabby asked as she shook her head, still bowed in contrition, "Wh-why? Why now, why today? Why…why can't I have one last day of not worrying about these…these issues?"

Mike rolled his eyes, not liking his part in this at all. He caved just a little and then grabbed Gabby in a hug. With her head lying along his shoulder, he explained as she cried, "I'm sorry, Gabby, but orders are orders and right now you have to go into the forest to meet your dad."

"Who – whose orders?" she hiccupped, trying to quell her crying.

"Can't say."

"Are – are you training me?" she asked, sniffing.

Mike laughed, "Me, with the way I just gave in to you now?"

Gabby sighed and realized it was going to be her own father training her. "My dad, then"

"Still can't say, Gabby," Mike sighed, "but you have to go, now, before he comes for you, okay." He pulled away from her. Taking her chin in hand, he tilted her tear-stained face up to meet his. How he hated being strict, but he had to, "You need to do this, and I will make you go!" He smiled and indicated the forest with a subtle nod of his head, "Now!" and pulled away from her. Mike then took her by her shoulders and turned her around, giving her an encouraging pat on the back. The next thing he did surprised Gabby; he pushed her in the direction he wanted her to go.

Gabby couldn't help but step forward, of course, and it seemed to be what she needed. Yet, her steps were haltingly slow and hesitant, insecure with a growing, gnawing fear welling up inside of her. Yes, she realized, she needed to overcome this. But as far as she was concerned, now was not the time. She would have been happy to wait until Seth returned, when he could accompany her, and maybe celebrate their reunion in the sanctuary of trees. Yes, she thought, that would replace her bad memories with at least one good one, and in that moment, she began to miss her husband all over again! It only added a few more tears to her collection, too. She hugged herself in despair, now, overcome with missing her family again, her longing slightly overshadowing her current situation.

Nevertheless, Gabby continued to walk, finding herself skirting around towards the right side of the yard, keeping to the eastern part of the planter closest to her. She edged between it and the fire pit on her right, with the pool now off to her far left and down the shallow hill from the house. A few steps more and Gabby found herself at the fork in the path that led either to the smaller home she and Seth lived in, or the one that led straight towards the back fence and the forest of redwoods beyond.

She stopped.

"Gabby, don't!" Mike warned from where he stood at the patio door. He was now a good one hundred feet from where she stood and she wondered in that moment how fast he truly was. She knew that Mike was older than she was by at least thirty years and even though he was ninja, he had old injuries that might slow him down.

Her breathing was almost a gasp, now, the struggle and battle within rising to a crescendo that was almost palatable. Gabby stared at the trees and then, not moving her head, allowed her eyes to do a sideways glance at her house, its front porch less than twenty-five feet away. It offered her a refuge of safety that now beckoned to her, tempting her.

There was a time when it had been the trees calling out to her. Not too many years before, they had promised her escape from what had been an overbearing Don Tello, when he had forced her from her home in Connecticut.

Now, with her imagination, the forest sneered dangerously at Gabby, promising not escape, but terror unbridled.

Gabby only hesitated for a moment, and then she made her decision.

She ran – for her house, knowing it was unlocked, because no one had thought to lock it, because no one believed she would run.