Chapter 12: These Are Not Your Parents Or Your Planet

The Kent Family Farm. Smallville, Kansas

"George Johnathan Kent, how many times do I have to tell you that the nice boy from two houses down can handle that tractor?", a concerned Martha asks from the front porch. "Honey, I'm just checking the engine before he comes here. I'm just going to take care of the pigs like I promised this oh-so-fine morning", George replies wholeheartedly, with a wheat grain in his mouth. "I don't like to brag, but those were my best batch of pancakes since Clark's graduation day", Martha giggles in her rocking chair.

"So these are the Earth elders Kal-El dare call his family", Brainiac confirms miles above the clouds blissfully covering the Kent farm. "They will suffer for their hostage sheltering crimes", he berates while rocketing down to the respected barn house.

"Contacting Kal-El of Krypton and Earth. This message is played at a frequency only we can hear and communicate", the mechanical monster exclaims calmly. "…Y-you? What do you want?", Clark stutters half-awake in a very confused manner, lying next to a snoring Lois. "It is I, Brainiac; your mechanical brother. You have offended me and betrayed our people for far too long. You will suffer almost as much as Krypton's death in that scrap yard you call a family farm—" "Leave the two parents alone." "So they are your chosen guardians." "Jor-El chose this planet for me, I never chose who would watch me in his absence." "It is a shame, as your acceptance is the same as choosing, regardless of age." "If you want to make me suffer, then get me. Don't touch them!", Clark demands louder. "Then save them, denounce your earthly ties, and join me or you all die, starting with them. My scanners indicate they are conversing with a small human child. Even he shall die as per my core programming. Sounding off now." "DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH THEM, THEY HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!", Clark bellows loud enough to startle Lois awake.

"W-whah happun? Who's trying to kill us now?", Lois gargles while grabbing for a magic enhanced pistol in her nightstand. "No, no, put down the Constantine gift we agreed to donate to the Vatican a long while ago", Clark calms himself down, lowering Lois' right arm. "Before the dad of that little goth girl on the Teen Titans tried to take over us with demons", she rebuts, putting it down as she heads to her closet for the US Army baseball bat. "But who were you talking to? Was it that robot Brainiac guy? Can I whack it and have Dad come in?"

"It was Brainiac, but no armed forces. He's too dangerous—" "And predictable! Beep boo beep look at me, I will destroy Superman beep boo beep", she replies, crudely imitating a more old fashioned robot. "Predictable..? Wait a minute, let's think about this. All he does is kidnap innocent people, try to kill me with sheer strength and strategy—" "He got some good licks on you, not gonna lie", Lois sheepishly interrupts, slipping into a light skirt. "He also follows the codes of Krypton. Someone else did that almost to a T." "If you say his name starts with Z, you'll get a dictionary thrown at your head, MC Corn", Lois dryly replies.

"This machine has to have a ship floating somewhere nearby our orbit, but where?", Clark thinks aloud to himself. "I can check the Bronx warehouse for any leftover information. If those guards were rookies, they might have missed a spare flash drive or two", Lois brainstorms as well. "Ya know what, I'll check the spot now." "Are you sure?" "Yeah, I'll get Jimmy to help me out, give him some reporting experience that he desperately needs. It'll be—" Clark torpedoes out from the bedroom window, dropping a crowbar on her side of the bed with a note saying 'This will help open doors, and give Jimmy a copy of the watch Ma and Pa have'.

The Kent Family Farm Road. Smallville, Kansas

"So, Mr Kent, sir, does this happen often?", asks a bewildered local teen, tied next to Martha and Jon. "Not really, but I can't say it won't happen again", Martha replies, slyly using her hair pin to loosen the knot on the tie. "Son, I know you're new on the farm, but we got some things to talk about later", George sighs, trying to wiggle out. "Silence, humans. You have the right to remain so as per your Earth policing rules, which I will use as the one remaining rule before the grand revision", Brainiac barks.

"Leave them out of your insidious plans, Brainiac", Superman interrupts, landing ever-so-smoothly. "Traitor, you have answered my call. Excellent. Now choose."

"You are a sadistic, emotionless fiend. Only madmen rely on hostages to even begin a rigged test." "Rigged? You say those words as if you are aware of the answer sheet, son of Krypton", Brainiac replies, slyly pressing a red button on his head. "From my short but more than suffice time on this primitive planet, I have gained enough knowledge for your pets to consider me a god of history. I have also done unconscious research on Kryptonians on this planet, leading me to a multitude of your so-called 'conspiracy theories'."

"And it led you here. Let these random civilians go; I won't ask a second time", Superman sternly replies. "These are not random civilians to you, Clark Kent of Kansas." "What did you say?" "These are your Earth parents, Kal-El. No one revealed your secret blatantly, but you left too many hints behind for even a sadistic, emotionless fiend of a madman to put together." "…You liar!" "From never criticizing the Superman in your local newspaper, always hiding in a phone booth whenever that cape flies high, those inhuman college football records, to even buying a wedding ring for his ace reporter girlfriend; how couldn't anyone?"

"Clark, am I going to be a mother-in-law soon?", Martha blurts in shock. "You really are his parents!", the young boy murmurs to himself in shock. "…I wanted to propose to her on our anniversary Monday", Clark somberly replies. "She will die childless, Kyrptonian, just like you", Brainiac rudely rebuts, rocketing directly into Superman's stomach. "Confirm the alliance with your true heritage, or confirm your death. There is no third option", he adds, dragging Superman across the corn fields of Kansas by the cape.

A very nervous Superman does a barrel roll and blasts him with heat vision, hoping to fry his circuits swiftly. "You are an intelligent being, Kal-El. Yet I am also blessed with the abilities all born on Krypton have, including my unbreakable shell." Brainiac then proceeds to give Superman a left-right-left triple combo, crashing the both of them to the ground. "Surrender or suffer." "I'm here to fight for truth, justice, and the American way", Clark replies, grabbing Brainiac's head and ramming his knee into the robot's forehead area.

"So you choose,… death", Brainiac dryly calculates, dousing Clark with a Kryptonite energy blast. "So be it, Kal-El, son of my father Jor-El", he blurts with emotionless apathy, using the deadly rays once more. "It is treason of the highest order to deny assistance to your home planet's armed forces. I will conquer this planet as my other bodies have conquered the universe." Brainiac slaps Superman with both hands Three Stooges style, blasting more energy of the green death variety.

Cell Block JSJS1938. One Police Plaza, Downtown Metropolis

"You're an idiot of the highest degree", an armor-less, orange jump suit wearing Manta barks at Luthor. "How could I predict the new Flash would barge in because someone decided to teleport a submarine in VIEWING DISTANCE?!", he retaliates, pointing at Grodd furiously. "So everyone wants to feel the wrath of a mechanical monstrosity that is beyond controlling?", the gorilla rebuts. "Will you guys shut the fuck up already? I just want to sleep for God's sake!", Wilson hollers, throwing a pillow at Luthor from the top bunk. "If you didn't do anything, you don't get to talk!", Manta hollers back.

Suddenly, a red and yellow burst of energy slips through the cracks of the prison wall. "Fellas, shut your goddamn face holes, grab each other by the hand, and then grab me right now no questions asked", Zoom interrupted, sticking his hand out impatiently as multiple alarms blare in the background. "…please tell me Cheetah's grabbing our suits", Manta begrudgingly begs, helping Wilson out of his bunker. "Let's just say I pulled some strings with Toyman while you guys were in Antartica", Zoom sassily replies.

"The last time you pulled strings, at least twenty bodies with their intestines out in the open were scattered on Central City's Beer District", Luthor replied. "Don't worry, someone else will be ripping bodies apart this time." A roar of a bear-sized creature shakes the ground as the Legion slips away into a nearby alleyway.

"AMAZO THE STRONGEST THERE IS, AMAZO REIGNS SUPREME!", roars the creature at the top of its lungs, with visible beams of heat vision seeping through the windows of One Police Plaza. "Oh Father who art thou in Heaven, save me now", Wilson mutters. "Didn't that Dr Ivo guy create him?", Manta questions aloud. "Toyman borrowed him for a mission, and I stole Amazo, no biggie", Zoom replies happily. "You stole the remote too, right, Zoom?" "…there's a remote?", he stutters in fear.

"There you are, Legion of Doom. Here is your former greatest pain, his family, and your new bringer of death: me", Brainiac interrupts, dropping everyone on the hard concrete with callous indifference.

END OF CHAPTER 12