Disclaimer: I cannot tell a lie. I do not own Harry Potter.

Thank you so much for the reviews. I'm glad you guys like it. Here's another one for you all.

Today was another brilliant day in the life of Hermione Granger. The sun was shining, the birds were chirping, and they were even serving chocolate chip cookies at breakfast.

My ass.

I woke up this morning with a tight feeling in my back because I had slept in an extremely odd position with my arms twisted in a different direction than my legs. I also found that while sharing a head dorm and common room with Malfoy wasn't that bad (because we rarely saw each other), we had to deal with each other's annoying quirks.

For example, last night, I had gotten almost no sleep because I was busy comforting a crying first year that missed his mom, dad, and pet fish Sam. When I trudged back up to my new dorm to try to enjoy the last hours of sleep I had, I found that stupid Malfoy had changed the password on me.

So there I was, sitting outside the portrait of the old witch that was intently painting her nails a puke-worthy green, which was the entrance to our dorms.

Luckily, the witch recognized me, and she let me in without further ado. Plus she told me what the password was, and oh what a surprise it was.

Hermione Granger is a buck toothed beaver.

Lordy lord, will he ever grow up? I mean I lost those beaver like teeth like 3 years ago (thanks to him actually). Give me a break. I mean at least I don't have a flat squashed nose like that Parkinson girl of his.

I immediately change the password to 'Malfoy the bouncing ferret'.

Hey if he can be immature, so can I. It's a game for two.

Anyway to get on with Malfoy's quirk, I wake up at 6 am to the sound of Malfoy singing in the shower.

SINGING

First of all, let me inform you that he was horrible. However, he was not only horrible at singing, but he was belting out the terrible noise coming out of his mouth at the top of his lungs.

Needless to say that I couldn't sleep anymore, so I got myself ready, and read a book until it was time for breakfast.

Did I mention that we get free dress every Monday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday now? Since today was Monday, I was dressed very comfortably in a pair of jeans and an old green shirt. The one thing I didn't really do this morning though, was look in the mirror.

I walked down to the Great Hall to meet Harry and Ron for breakfast, as well as get our new timetables.

I see Ron looking much more alive, and begin to comment on his rude state from last night when he blurts out,

"What happened to you, you look like shit."

I stop in midsentence. I quickly whip out a hand mirror and gasp. I have bed hair and circles under my eyes. I run a brush through my hair, stuff my hair into a ponytail, and glare at Ron.

I forgive him though because Ron is hopeless when it comes to girls.

Harry stifles a grin and says, "You'll always look beautiful to me Mione."

"Aaaaw, cut the crap Harry," I reply knowing that he's just teasing me.

Then Snape does his super cool, evil, swoop down on my students and swish my cloak thing as he passes our timetables to us.

Ron and Harry both make disgusted faces as he does this, but I look at him in semi-awe. I've always admired that he can do that intimidating thing. Of course I don't tell Harry or Ron anything about my secret admiration for his talent. I'm not stupid.

We have our new gym class first with all the other seventh and sixth years in all of the houses. This excites me, because now I can spend a class hanging out with Susan, which is something I rarely get to do.

My brain is slowly registering now that by all houses in the same class, it means that this will include Slytherin.

Oh joy.

Slytherins are such fun suckers. They don't even have to be present and they can suck the fun out of anything.

Breakfast is a hearty meal, and Harry and I warn Ron not to eat too much. We both have had past experience with gym class and know better than to drink lots of… stuff before going to class unless you want to upchuck everything.

Ron of course doesn't listen. When it comes to food, he is deaf to all that dare to say a word against it.

Susan joins us at our table, and we watch in awe as Ron shovels eggs down his throat at an amazing speed.

We both turn to each other wide-eyed and say to each other…

"Wow."

I have never seen anything like that. It's actually kind of gross now that I see bits of egg and spittle dribbling down Ron's chin.

And he wonders why he doesn't have a girlfriend.

As I am busy watching Ron fascinated by his stomach capacity, I notice a little exchange between Susan and Harry.

They both reach for the syrup at the same time and their hands touch. Ok that seems normal, what's weird about that right?

Well Susan blushes, and that is definitely not normal. It is obvious now that Susan has a bit of a crush on Harry. How cute.

Harry of course doesn't notice, being a guy and all. Plus he isn't self conscious as he used to be. He's more confident, and in insane flirt.

I feel a deep rush of pity for Susan, because Harry gets flirted with so often, and she must feel horrible when he flirts back. Which is always. Seeing that Harry is the boy who lived as well as a 'hottie', it's not surprising that many girls like him.

Wait. An idea has just come to me. Operation get Susan to tell Harry she likes him and get them together.

Operation GSTHSLHAGdoubleT for short.

After staring at those letters in my brain, they kind of remind me of Go Sloth, so I decide that it will be the name of my secret operation of getting them together.

After Ron finally finishes his fifteenth pancake, we all head for our physical education class.

My guess is that it will be interesting.

…………………………………………………………………

All of us students are gathered in the quidditch stands waiting for Snape's arrival. We are all dead silent just in case he is in a bad mood (which he invariably is).

Five minutes pass.

There is rising level of whispers.

Ten minutes pass.

People are talking now in their normal voices. Harry, Ron, and Susan are in deep conversation about how students stick their gum under quidditch bleachers and classroom desks.

I'm curious as to people sticking their gum under quidditch bleachers. I know people stick it under their desks, but I never thought people chewed gum during quidditch matches, or maybe it helps calm their nerves.

To check if there really was gum under the benches, I tucked my knees under me and bent my head down to see if there was gum.

I couldn't see any so I bent my head lower till I was hanging almost upside-down.

"Oh Lordy Lord! You are absolutely right Harry, there is gum under these seats," I exclaim and promptly lose my balance as I tumble down the stands.

I shriek, once again at the wrong time.

Snape has entered the building.

Followed by an extremely cheerful Dumbledore.

What a contrast. I distinctly hear Snape cursing, while Dumbly-dore is happily placing a whistle around Snape's neck, and handing him a book on the rules of muggle sports.

"What the bloody hell is this," Snape grumbles gruffly holding up the whistle and shaking it furiously under Dumbledore's nose.

"Why it's a whistle Severus. It is a rather remarkable muggle contraption" he replies serenely with a twinkle in his eyes.

With that he grabs the whistle whilst it is still around Snape's neck, choking him in the process.

While Snape's face is turning from red, to purple, to blue, Dumbly-dore is oblivious as he demonstrates the use of a whistle through whistling shrilly repeatedly.

He seems to be enjoying himself.

"Oh Severus, I am sorry. I'm afraid I didn't notice that you couldn't breathe. My deepest apologies. I do get carried away sometimes," Dumbledore apologizes as Snape leans against the side of the quidditch stands gasping for air.

As he gulps in air, Snapes face slowly returns to it's normal pale coloring, but not before it switches shades of color in reverse order.

All of us students lean forward in fascination.

I happen to glance at Dumbledore and notice that he is still enjoying himself. In fact I now think that he created this class for his own childish amusement. I once read in a book that when people get old and senile, they get more childish as days go by. Perhaps Dumbledore is finally going senile.

Either that or he is a cynical old coot.

I'm guessing the latter.

"Since Professor Snape seems to be indisposed at the moment, I would like to introduce you to your new class. Welcome to physical education."

Snape is still wheezing heavily, leaning against the stands for support. He makes an angry face at Dumbledore. If there is one thing Snape doesn't like, it's other people teaching his class for him.

Neville's hand slowly raises.

Susan and I exchange eye rolls. We haven't even been told anything and he already has a question?

"Mr. Longbottom put your hand d…" Snape snaps and is interrupted by Dumbledore.

"Questions will be taken at the end of the class," Dumbledore says pleasantly, not noticing the death glare Snape is shooting at him for the interruption he made.

Oooooh Snape is muh-ad. This is bound to be amusing.

I look around at the rest of the students, and as if on cue, everyone leans forward in interest once again.

Parvati and Lavender are whispering furiously to each other. No doubt the entire school will have heard about our interesting class by the end of the day.

"I would appreciate it if you took your nose out of my business and left my class for me to teach because I want to teach it," Snape angrily bellows at Dumbledore, each word getting louder as he continues to yell.

Snape suddenly claps a hand to his mouth, looking absolutely horrified.

That's when I realized what he said. He said that he wanted to teach us. Dumbledore tricked him. I really can't believe this.

"Well then Severus, if you really want to teach them that badly you can. I came down here to tell you that I would take the class over since you seemed so against it, but now it is evident to me that you really want to teach these young adults. I reassure you that I wasn't trying to steal away the job that you so badly want to teach," Dumbledore says lightly, while Snape gapes at how he was duped.

"But..but…," stammers Snape.

"Well then, Goodbye ladies and gentlemen," Dumbledore finishes nonchalantly, and leaves with a swish of his fluorescent purple robes.

"Well that was interesting," says Susan mildly as she and I observe Snape's horrified expression. "It's rather odd to see him wearing that expression two nights in a row, when I have never seen him make that face in all seven years here."

I nod in agreement.

Snape regains self control, clears his throat, and we all listen attentively. "Well then, here are the uniforms you will be required to wear during this class. You will be able to use the quidditch changing rooms to change into them, and will be expected to wear them at every class," he says gruffly, trying to hide his embarrassment having been tricked by an old man on the verge of becoming senile.

With that he tosses our new uniforms at us with a flick of his wand. Our uniforms consist of a shirt and shorts, rather practical if I say so myself, but it's the color scheme that shocks me.

They look revolting. The shirt is divided into four parts to represent the four houses, each one the color of a respective. In each section there is also the house crest, and smack dab in the middle there is a huge Hogwarts crest.

Eeew.

Oops I think I said that out loud because Snape is glaring at me now.

"Is there a problem Miss. Granger? It's too bad that you find the uniforms so revolting, because they go excellently with your repulsive face," Snape remarks coolly.

Oh my blubbering whales. He did not say that. Of course I don't shoot a sarcastic remark back at him. He's a teacher. I can't lose house points.

Harry does however.

"I think you should stop talking about yourself professor, it's rather unnerving," Harry retorts in a seemingly indifferent tone.

Snape just snarls.

Yay! Harry to the rescue. Once again.

Susan is almost swooning on the spot at how he 'saved me from the evil clutches of Snape's evilness' in her words.

I can't believe Harry still doesn't notice that Susan likes him.

Boys are so thick.

We hear the bells of the clock in the astronomy tower strike eleven in the distance. I can't believe class is already over.

As the students clamber down the bleachers as fast as their legs can carry them, Snape shouts over the crowd that we should wear our uniforms to class tomorrow, and we are going to start with some sport called basketball.

I smile to myself because I love basketball. Maybe this class won't be so bad after all.

Sorry if you found this chapter disappointing, but I needed something to introduce the class to everyone. Plus, it was really fun to write. Hope you like it, and don't forget to...

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