Disclaimer: I don't own nothing except Anna, Elizabeth and John

Chapter 6: Realization

Evening, April 13, 1912

Hitomi was eating yet another delicious meal from RMS Titanic's finest. It may have not been the delicate, elaborate dishes from the night before but it was just as appetizing.

She was just finishing dessert and looking out for Van. I shouldn't be looking for him in the first place, anyway. This whole thing with him will only end in heartbreak. Besides, he'll probably forget about me within a few weeks after the boat docks. Jeez, I shouldn't be feeling such self-pity. I know! I'll just tell him that I don't like him and I don't appreciate his intentions.

I couldn't do that to him though! I love him!

Oh no! But I do appreciate his intentions, whatever they may be.

It doesn't matter though; I have to end this before it gets too serious. I could ruin his whole future and his family might disown him! His parents do sound horrible but I have to make sure he doesn't do anything spontaneous. Poor people like me don't belong with people like him.

The general room was as crowded as ever and people were chatting incessantly. They looked the exact opposite of how Hitomi was feeling. She was dreading when the ship would dock and her glumness only increased when she noticed all the happy couples.

Her thoughts were interrupted when the object of her affection and his sister came in. They came!

They walked over to Hitomi's table. Merle was dressed in a casual dress, or at least, as casual as you can get. Hitomi was willing to bet it still cost quite a bundle. Van was dressed in a black tunic and beige pants. He looked as handsome as ever and the clothes accentuated his tall figure.

Merle said hello and her eyes instantly lit up when she saw Mamoru. The same look was mirrored in Mamoru's eyes. Hitomi looked at them and couldn't help but feel content for her brother but then she thought, he's in the same position that I'm in. Wanting someone who's out of their league. She started talking with Mamoru and Van couldn't help but notice her excitement and her liveliness when she spoke with Mamoru.

Van turned to Hitomi, "So, how are you milady? Enjoying the festivities?"

"Why of course! This is extravagant. And the past afterwards is even better!" Hitomi smiled.

Van looked at her with his eyebrows raised. Hitomi immediately caught onto his meaning. "No! I don't mean that!" Hitomi's cheeks reddened. "I mean the dancing!"

Van said, "Hahaha I was only teasing you, Hitomi."

"I knew that…pff," Hitomi glanced away.

Van changed the subject. "I take it there will be another night of continuous dancing?" he asked cheekily.

"But of course! You can't expect any less from the people at the bottom of the boat!" Hitomi laughed. "We have to liven things up."

Van grinned and held out his arm. "Shall we Madame?"

"Yes sir." No, I can't…oh no! I'm falling under his spell again… oh well.

Hitomi followed Van to the 'dancing room'. Along with them were, Mamoru, Merle, Chesta, Celena, Yukari, and Amano.

The music was just as lively, if not more than the night before.

This night was much different though. Hitomi was more aware of Van and how much she cared for him in such a short time. She realized just how comfortable she was with him emotionally and physically. I feel so safe in his arms.

There was a much slower song and they were very close. Hitomi had rested her head on Van's chest and his arms were secure around her waist, as if he could never let go. (A/N: I realize dancing was much more formal back then and people didn't dance extremely close, but bare with me people)

Without warning, Van stiffened. That's weird he felt so comfortable with me before. Was it me? Hitomi looked up and saw Anna staring at them from the doorway. Oh no! what is she doing here?

She looked up at Van's face and saw a mix of disgust and anger in his eyes. Is he disgusted because of me?

He let go of her and began walking towards Anna. Anna ran off and he followed her. Maybe I was wrong about his feelings for her. Maybe he is in love with her. What if he was fooling me the entire time? I'm such an idiot.

Hitomi went and sat down. She grabbed a glass of beer from a random table.

000000000000000000

"Anna, what the hell are you doing here? Were you spying on me? (AN: Ugh duh Van)

"Of course not! I was simply exploring the ship!"

"Oh yes, and you just happened to come across me on the middle deck! (A/N: F).

"Well, yes! What were you doing with that filth anyway, Van? Really, you're so much better than 3rd class." She ran her finger along his arm.

"How dare you call her filth! She's not the one who cares what people think! She's the most compassionate, selfless woman I've ever met! All you can ever think about is the wealth! Why don't you take a look at yourself and maybe you'll see that you're the trash?" Van turned and walked away.

Anna was left speechless.

000000000000000000

Hitomi was on her fourth glass of beer. Mamoru came up to her and started to shake her. "Hitomi! What the hell are you doing? What were you thinking! You never drink! Oh god, I'm taking you back to your room this instant!"

Her vision was blurry and she felt a bit faint. "Huh, that'sss not true! You crazy, brother!"

"Oh god, my sister's drunk!" Mamoru turned to Merle. "Listen, I have to take my sister back. Can you wait here for me?" Merle looked a bit disappointed but then she smiled.

"Alright, as long as you're not too long…"

"Okay, c'mon Hitomi." Mamoru picked Hitomi up and placed her over his shoulder.

"Mamoru, I can take her!" Van came running in.

Mamoru looked at Van then back at Hitomi. He sighed. "Alright, her room number is E-66." Mamoru passed Hitomi into Van's arms. She was shaking her head and mumbling.

"Just take care of her, okay?" Mamoru asked.

Van nodded. "I will."

Van walked out the door with the drunken Hitomi.

000000000000000000

"Your poor sister, I wander what brought that on," Merle added.

"Yes, me too. That's not usually like her. She's probably only drank once in her life." Mamoru looked towards the door.

"I'm sure she'll be fine. She seems like a very strong person."

"She is. I don't know anyone more self-assertive than her."

"Perhaps it's love." Merle murmured.

"I imagine it is. Nothing has ever happened to Hitomi. I'm just worried about her. What will happen when the ship docks?"

"Moving on. Everyone moves on," Merle said with a sigh.

Mamoru got the feeling that they weren't just talking about Hitomi anymore.

"What if they don't want to move on?" he asked. She looked up at him with her dark blue eyes.

"What if they can't move on? Merle?" His burned into hers.

"I don't- I don't know." She was gazing into his eyes so intensely that it took his breath away.

"No one should have to move on, Merle. Only achieve happiness." He moved closer to her. "Do you want happiness, Merle?"

"Yes, of course I do. But-"

"There are no buts when it comes to love." For once, Mamoru's voice was filled with passion. Merle gasped.

"It's impossible. I could never-"

"Do something for yourself, Merle." With that, Mamoru walked away.

Merle watched as he walked away and his words repeated in her mind. Do something for yourself. My heart tells me I should but my mind speaks otherwise. What would mother and father think? They'd probably disown me. She gave a laugh. I know what I want but should I decide to follow it?

Merle looked around at the happy couples and saw the love in their eyes. I want to be them, no matter what my life is. I run my own life, not my parents.

Screw mom and dad! I'm in love with that man! I'm going to follow my heart and no one's rules and expectations are going to stop me!

Merle ran after Mamoru and she caught him in the hall. "Mamoru wait! Wait!"

Mamoru slowly turned around and looked at her with such emotion that her knees went weak.

She walked up to him. "I've been thinking about what you said, and I know what I want."

"And what is that?"

"You know what that is!" she yelled.

"Ah, yes, but I would love to hear it," he grinned cockily.

"Alright, I want your heart, body and soul! I want to be with you for the rest of my life!" She yelled at him.

Mamoru smiled with such warmth that she almost gasped. "That's exactly whatI wanted to hear, my love."

"I like the sound of that," Merle purred.

"Me too, love."

000000000000000000

"Put me down." Hitomi mumbled.

"Not a chance, dear. I'm not risking your health for the world."

She tried to push herself out of his arms but they wouldn't budge.

"Why don't you go back to the one you're really in love with? Not some poor girl who needs your pity?" Hitomi sounded miserable.

Van looked at her in confusion. What is she talking about? Is she talking about Anna? But I hate her, I thought she knew that!

"Hitomi, I don't love Anna. She's nothing but a snob."

Van opened Hitomi's door and her room was empty. He placed her on one of the beds. He grabbed a glass and filled it with water from the sink. He poured some of the water on a cloth. Hitomi opened her eyes when he patted her face with the cloth.

"Hitomi, do you have a bowl of some sort or a large container?" Van asked gently.

"I think- I think there's one under the bed." Hitomi moaned. She was going to have a massive headache in the morning.

Van pulled a large wooden bowl from under the bed. "I'm going to put this beside the bed. I imagine you'll be throwing up quite soon. So just relax."

Poor girl, he thought. "I want you to know, Hitomi. I'm in love with you not-" he cut off when he heard snoring. I guess she didn't hear me. Oh well, I'll tell her tomorrow when the time is right. Not when she's going to be experiencing an extreme hangover within the next few hours.

Then, I'll take her home with me.

000000000000000000

How dare she? Who is that disgusting man with my Hitomi? I'm the one for her, not some first class hotshot? (A/N:This made me laugh haha since when did people in the early 20th century say hotshot? Hahaha) I'm going to slit his throat, Dilandau thought.

And then…Hitomi will be mine.

000000000000000000

Oooh, looks like Dilandau's back on the scene dun dun dun!

Sorry about the chapter being so short. This was actually going to connect to the last one but I felt I should put this part in another chapter. Besides I love the title. It sounds so dramatic. And oh my gosh! I just had to add the Merle/Mamoru part. It was cute I thought! So much romance, so little time.

I usually have a chapter for each day. But the next few chapters are obviously going to take place in one night, because….it's the final night tomorrow! And it's going to be so exciting! April 14, the night that ended, or… started it all!

And yes, I agree, Hitomi's being dumb. Who cares about Van's parents? Geez

Love you all

Krissi