Greetings. So, I left this story at a very abrupt end almost four years ago. I was pretty set back then to just let it stand as it was. But after a time, I realized that I wasn't writing this story for me anymore, but for the attention and response from others. That was wrong, and a disservice to my love for LOST and these characters. I love writing and I love nothing more than to expand upon the world that the creators, writers, actors and so forth blessed us with so many years ago.
Over the years I spent away, reviews trickled in here and there, saying how much I was missed and how good my writing is and how it was a shame I had given up on the platform. Shame bottled within me and I began to wonder if it was right to ever leave. Writing is another way for me to have fun and to, yes, engage with others. I wasn't feeling at all engaged with people who just passively read and moved on. I felt slighted, resentful. Cheated. I wasn't the only one. My good friend Monica (AKA ems023, a champion of a writer herself, far more deserving of reviews than I) abandoned the site as well. But, more than that, I am proud to say that I now feel liberated from the resentment that those actions created inside of me.
The last story I posted here was "Adam and Eve", a one-off about the attraction that Jack and Kate exude for each other. I remember writing that in 20 minutes, wrought with inspiration and love for the characters. It felt good to get back in the saddle of writing. I had no expectations of people reviewing it, and again, that feeling of liberation made the writing more enjoyable. To my surprise, people ate it up. Again, not expecting it.
Tamara (AKA DimpleCurlAeternaGirl, a smart, kind, wonderful woman, who writes with so much love and care for Jack and Kate, especially Kate, damn does she know Kate Austen! Please go read her stories!), read the chapters that remained here, and reviewed my farewell note. Again, her response echoed those of others, that the story was amazing and she missed it. I decided to message her, thanking her for noticing my story, which was surely buried under the rubble of others after so many years, right? What she wrote back inspired me to finally post this story in its entirety here on this site.
Where it begins, it shall end.
'What did she say?' You ask. What I knew but was too bullheaded to admit. Writing is about MY JOY for it, not for attention or a response. It is for me. I decide to share it again, because I can no longer allow others to steal my joy. Thank you Monica for coming back and thank you Tamara for inspiring me to do the same.
I HIGHLY encourage you to go back and read the earlier chapters if you can, if you're even at all interested. If for anything but to catch up and refresh yourself on the adventure I have laid out piece by piece. I don't care if you review. I just care that you feel what I have written and from where I have written it, my love for writing and LOST.
Without further adieu, Chapter 23, lovingly titled the day my life changed forever, "September 22, 2004". Chapters 24 to 29, already written, but never posted here, are to follow. Chapter 30 is currently in the works.
Enjoy. :)
Juliet stood within the make-shift kitchen a few feet from the tent that Rose was kind enough to let her use. She rubbed at her lower back discreetly, the small cot she battled with through the night was too thin and too firm, but she was grateful nonetheless. It was settled, as she knew it would be. She missed her bed. She missed sleeping indoors, already, and she had been back less than a day.
Her palms lay flat over the counter that was a bit lop-sided, but worked for what it needed to. Bamboo shelves were filled with DHARMA-labeled goods, so many they were blurring her vision. She was starving, but didn't know what to choose. Her eyes mulled over her options.
"Can I help you find something?" The voice startled her so badly, she jolted. She turned to take in Bernard's smiling face. He bent down to pet Vincent over the head and snout. Juliet let out a small laugh as she collected herself. She clutched at the fabric of her shirt that sat between her breasts.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." Bernard said.
She closed her eyes, letting out a steep breath, before she smiled again, less anxious. "No, you're fine. A tour would actually be nice."
"Okay, great, let me show you what fell out of the sky this month," Bernard said as he approached her. He pointed at the goods higher up, explaining what they were and how to get to them by pointing to a small, hand-made ladder. He then pointed to the lower, more accessible shelving, bags and boxes lined very neatly. "Oatmeal is here. Cereal is here. We got some dry milk here. We're running low on fresh water, haven't had a storm in awhile, but I reckon that's about to change."
"Well, I guess it's nice to have this stuff on hand. You said this fell out of the sky 'this month'? Do you get packages often?"
"Yeah, like clockwork. Me and some of the other guys go out into the jungle, same spot, to pack and bring it on in." Bernard read the almost amused look on Juliet's face, and added, "Does that sound as weird to you as it does to me?"
Juliet shook her head. "Actually, it sounds alarmingly familiar."
"So, when you came back with Jack, you said he disappeared mid-flight?" Bernard asked.
"Yeah, our pilot was unconscious and Jack took over the controls, and I turn around, and he's gone."
Bernard continued to prod. "You said something about a bright purple light…"
"Yeah," Juliet tilted her head, curious about his line of questioning. "I'm sorry, but, do you know something about it?"
"No, I just get pretty curious is all. Rose hates it, doesn't like to ask questions, says it tempts fate, but I think it keeps me young." Bernard chuckled. "I also think she's just afraid that it'll give it back."
"Give what back?" Juliet asked.
"Her cancer." Bernard was so nonchalant that Juliet thought she heard him wrong.
"You and Rose think that the Island cured her cancer?" Juliet asked. She was a doctor, and was brought here for her research, to figure out just why the mothers kept dying. One of her chief hypotheses was that if the mother conceived on the Island, she would indeed die due to immunological issues, but she never gathered enough evidence to prove it. Claire Littleton was her way of corroborating her work, but her blood showed that her results were consistent with the mothers who died during their pregnancies, but she was still alive. She made a mental note to check in on the young mother at some point.
She couldn't rule out what Bernard was saying, but that clinical, factual side of her fueled her question.
"We don't think, we know. She's been….better ever since we got here. Stronger. I can barely keep up with her."
Bernard continued. "I took her to a faith healer, in Australia, gave him a ten-thousand dollar donation to heal her. She made me believe that he did, but I knew the second she told me, that I would lose her."
"She lied to you." Juliet said.
"Yeah, she did, but I could never be upset with her for it. She was taking care of me, giving me what I needed to survive her illness. She's the strongest person I've ever known." Juliet could tell that he was getting choked up, but he coughed the emotion away.
"More to the point, there's something very special about this place, Juliet. Rose and I, we can't put our fingers on it exactly, but Jack disappearing like that…it makes you wonder where we really are and what's really possible here." Juliet began to really give what Bernard was saying some serious thought when Rose came from around the corner, looking for her husband, and finding him thanks for Vincent, who had ran off to greet her and lead her to him.
"Bernard, I thought you were gonna help m—" She came into view and saw Juliet conversing with her sometimes too-loquacious husband.
She folded the rest of the small blanket in her arms into a square. "Oh, hi, Juliet. How did you sleep last night? Good, I hope."
"Oh, it was fine. Thank you." She lied, the muscles in her lower back still screaming. "How are you doing this morning?"
"I'm great. Trying to get this laundry off the line and folded, but my husband, who promised to help me, was nowhere to be found."
"Oh, I'm sorry, I saw Juliet and I thought she might need some help navigating your impeccably organized pantry." His wide grin was greasy with an attempt to butter her up, and Rose rolled her eyes, but with a grin of her own.
"You are so full of it." She laughed as he wrapped an arm around her and laid a loving kiss to her cheek. Juliet smiled at the moment. They were such an affectionate couple. She found that watching the way they looked at each other made her miss being married.
"I guess I should go help my beautiful wife now. I'll leave you to it." Bernard said.
The elder couple rounded the corner to their tent and untended laundry, leaving her to deliberate her options. She became a bit bored with the task, but she was starving and would have to make a choice. She reached for the oatmeal, sprinkled a cup or so of the dry oats into a bowl, and walked over to one of the water troughs. She looked around the beach as she walked, and noticed the looks from some of the others. They really didn't know how to react to her and after last night, she wasn't exactly a favorite. These people were on Kate's side, as they should be.
She bent down to fill her bottle with water when she saw Sawyer. He was slouched over outside of his tent, his nose buried in the worn paperback he was pretty invested in. So, he likes to read, she mentally noted. He lowered the book, still reading avidly, and she was instantly amused by the nerdy glasses that adorned his face. Were they…taped together from two different pairs? His unkempt locks floated with the light breeze.
Suddenly she wasn't so hungry anymore. She approached his tent slowly. When she finally got to him, he was still reading his book, purposefully ignoring whoever had stepped up to him.
"Hey."
"What do you want?" Sawyer asked, turning the page a bit more harshly than necessary. His temper was still red hot. Great, Juliet thought, but she wouldn't back down. She plopped down next to him, her hands digging into the soft sand beneath her.
She peaked at the cover and then out to the water. "Hmm, Grapes of Wrath. I love that book. I ran a book club when I was here before. It was a bit tedious at times, you know, having people over, preparing refreshments, but actually discussing the book, sharing our views and opinions, honestly, it livened the experience."
He didn't say anything, leaving Juliet to awkwardly add, "Can you identify at all with Tom Joad?"
Sawyer slammed the book closed and offered a scathing glare. "Look, Blondie, I don't want to share my views and opinions about Tom Joad or anyone else for that matter. Don't you got somethin' better to do?"
"Nope, not really. I'm just trying to make conversation."
Sawyer went back to his book, "Well, go find Hugo. He's way better at conversation than I am."
"I don't think that's true." She said.
Sawyer snatched the glasses from his face. "And what makes you think I care about what you think?"
"Nothing, but that doesn't mean I stop trying to figure you out."
"You want to make conversation, figure me out? Okay, but I get to go first." He craned his neck to look at her. "Why in the hell would come back here for a man that could never return your feelings?"
"I didn't want him to do it alone." Juliet said simply.
"Even though you'll end up alone in the process, real smart." Sawyer quipped.
Juliet was ruffled by his dismissive tone, and replied with equal steam. "Even though Jack can't feel for me what I feel for him, he's still my friend. Do you even know how to be a friend, James?"
Her calling him by his real name had caught him off guard, and put him on the defensive. Most of all, it made him angry that she thought herself close enough to him to call him that. The only people he allowed to call him James were the people on this beach. Kate had set the precedent, and he never really objected, but now, he found himself objecting. She wasn't one of them. She was a nuisance, was always in his face. What was her problem?
"You do what you do to get what you want, and if you don't believe that, you're in denial, Juliet." Sawyer barked at her.
"I don't think I'm the one in denial." Juliet countered.
Sawyer squinted. "You think I'm in denial? About what?"
"About who you really are." The words were unexpected for both of them, as they continued to hold each other's gazes. What the hell was that supposed to mean? Sawyer asked himself. What did she know about who he was, or tried to be or had done? There was a real moment here, one they didn't expect, but there it was.
"Juliet!" Both Juliet and Sawyer turned at the sound of her name. Sayid was fast approaching while they stood up to greet him, thankful that the moment had been broken...for the time being.
"Is everything okay?" Juliet asked.
"I need to ask you a favor." Sayid said.
"Sure, what is it?"
"I need you to take me to the plane that brought you here."
Juliet looked at Sawyer, who was already looking down at her. "What? Why?"
"I've been thinking about its communication system. It wasn't a commercial flight, right?"
"It was a private plane, with its own…everything, even flew out of its own airport. Why are you asking me this?"
"Because I'm going to try a different approach to finding a signal that can get us off this Island."
Sayid began to explain his plan and how he needed the plane's communication equipment to get the job done. Juliet found it incredibly difficult to keep up. Sayid was using words she had never heard of before, which told her that he knew his way around a cockpit or at least the equipment inside of one. She'd read about his missions as a solder of the Republican Guard during the Gulf War. He was a torturer by trade, but wore many hats. She was beginning to see that for herself.
Sayid's excitement showed in how he spoke. His hope was rejuvenated. He had already stripped the Oceanic 815 aircraft clean. There wasn't a radio left for him to tinker with. The transceiver's battery was gone, and he had nothing to charge it with. The antennas he created had been destroyed by Locke, a transgression he still hadn't fully forgiven, even after he explained his rationale for having done it.
"What about Jack?" Juliet asked once he was done.
"I haven't given up on him, but we have no idea where he is or how to find him. We need to focus on doing what he came back to do, and that's to get everyone rescued. He would hate it if we used all of our resources in finding him and not take this opportunity." Sayid explained.
Juliet couldn't argue with him there. Jack was obsessed with rescuing these people, and would raise hell if they squandered the opening by worrying about him. "So, will you do it?" He asked.
"Uh, yeah. Sure." Juliet said, with a forced smile. She already knew these people didn't trust her, and if she didn't fess up right now, she would never earn their trust and only gain even more scrutiny.
Sayid nodded with as much a grin as he could muster. "Okay. We leave in ten minutes." He walked away and hadn't stepped five feet before Juliet confessed.
She closed her eyes and bit down on her bottom lip, readying herself for the fallout. "It's not gonna work."
"What?" Sawyer asked.
"How do you know that?" Sayid asked soon after, approaching her.
"Because Ben is purposefully blocking that signal, and there is no way around it."
"Don't you think you shoulda shared that before you said you could help?" Sawyer asked, irritated.
Sayid's keenness deflated like a popped balloon. "Now we're back to square one. Excellent."
"Maybe there's another way." Juliet said, before she could stop the words or at least think through where she planned to go with them.
Sayid brought his hands to his waist. "What makes you say that?"
"If you go to the plane with me, I'll show you." Juliet offered.
Sayid eyed Sawyer, communicating with him through his glance. He then looked back at Juliet, defeated and desperate. "Fine."
Juliet smiled, backing away as she said, "Okay, I'll grab my stuff. We leave in ten."
Sayid stepped away, leaving Sawyer to follow him close behind. "Hey. Mind if I join?"
"Sure. Why?" Sayid asked.
"Because I don't trust her one bit. She could still be working for Ben and that little confession could be a trap. Would be way easier to get the hell out alive if there's two against one."
"She left the Island voluntarily, Sawyer." Sayid pointed out.
"Maybe she left to spy on Jack for that little bug-eyed bastard. How convenient is it that she comes back without the Doc and tries to convince us that she's just out to help? Tell me this sounds legit to you." Sawyer dared him.
Sayid began to walk away from Sawyer, conflicted, but otherwise still open to his argument. "The last time we teamed up, it was against Kate, who turned out to be right."
"Okay, so our antennas were off on that one," Sawyer followed, "but Juliet? We don't know her, or where her true alliances lie. I for damn sure wouldn't be dumb enough to follow her to another island completely with just her word telling me so."
Sayid nodded. "Okay. We take precaution, but we do nothing unless she gives us a reason to."
"You got it." Sawyer agreed.
Juliet, Sayid and Sawyer marched a steady path through the jungle. They had just come from the beach, concealing the canoe as best they could before Juliet led them through the leaves. It had been hours since they left the beach, and as Juliet led the pack, she started to wonder about the logistics of this plan and how it would actually work.
"When the time comes, how are we gonna get all of those people to this Island?" Juliet asked as Sawyer approached her from the side.
"We got a boat." He said.
"You do?" Juliet asked. "Where'd you get it?"
"I'll tell you, right after you tell me what the hell is so important to show us, when you could have just told us on the beach, where it's somewhat safe."
Sawyer didn't waste any time, she thought. She still couldn't figure out why he wanted to come. He made it obvious that he didn't like spending time with her, but to volunteer to go on this trek said otherwise. Could he actually be making an effort to be friends, or friendly at least?
"And run the risk of not getting on your nerves? Not a chance." Juliet smiled, watching a tiny grin take shape on his face. So, his lips were capable of more than a hard, straight line. She felt a small flutter in her stomach. He was so handsome, she thought. Disarmingly so, and she could see just why so many women had fallen prey to him as he was robbing them blind.
"Aw, come on. Can't you give me a hint?" He tried to charm her.
Juliet kept her movements steady as she turned, offering a wink. "Now look who's trying to make conversation."
Sawyer shook his head. He walked right into that one. It was going to be harder to charm her out of the truth than he originally thought. Surprisingly enough, not a blonde hair on her pretty head was out of place. He was itching to catch her in a lie, but she was candid for the most part, or was she? He could never tell with her. He was a conman, it was his place to read people and take advantage, but this woman was holding everything close to the chest and damnit if he didn't kind of enjoy working for it. He still didn't trust her, and would never become a victim of her sneaky whims, but there was something else going on here. Maybe when he figured that out, he could finally catch her.
Suddenly, she stopped and crouched down a bit, looking through the leaves.
"Why are we stopped?" Sayid asked, gripping the handle of his gun, readying himself for defense.
"Because we're here." Her long ponytail whipped around as she turned to him. "I gave the pilot a gun before I left, so if he sees two people he's never met before, he just might open fire." She pushed her handgun into her jeans. "I'll go out first, and when I give the signal, you two follow."
"What's the signal?" Sawyer asked, preparing himself for something elaborate.
Juliet turned to Sawyer, deadpanning her words. "'You can come out now.'"
"Clean. I like it." Sawyer said with a nod. Juliet moved through the leaves, leaving Sawyer and Sayid behind.
"So, what do you think?" Sayid asked, trying to take a peek through the heavy leaves, but not seeing much of anything through the cracks.
"If she's lying, she ain't letting on. She's good." Sawyer said.
Juliet walked onto the even grass field from the slight incline from the jungle with her hands up. "Frank?" She screamed. Silence followed.
"It's me! Juliet!" She suddenly saw movement from the front end of the plane, and grinned her relief when she saw Frank appear, the gun she'd given him sitting between his clasped hands, his face unraveling from the danger he thought he was in.
"Dammit Doc." He let the gun point towards the ground as he stepped out and approached her. "At least you made it quick. Did you find Jack's camp?"
Juliet nodded. "I did."
Frank waited for her to continue, but she was stalling. "And?"
"And everyone is fine. I brought two of them back with me. I need to show them something." Juliet turned and yelled, "You can come out now!"
Frank watched as the two men stepped out from the leaves and tall blades of glass. The looks on their faces bore surprise and awe as they took in the large private plane, as high as the clear blue sky would allow it to be.
"Holy shit." Sawyer mumbled, his mouth open, nearly drooling over the impressive airliner.
"Frank, this is Sayid and Sawyer." Juliet introduced them.
"Pleasure." Sawyer offered.
Frank nodded. "Likewise." He turned to Juliet, who was climbing into the plane's cabin. "So, what exactly is it you need to show them?"
"This." She reappeared with the device in her hands. She approached Sayid and handed it to him. "It was in Jack's pack. I thought to bring it to the beach with me, but I hid it on the plane, thought it was safer that way."
Sayid silently marveled at it. Juliet, Sawyer and Frank watched him gleam over it; his facial expression marked his intrigue and confusion.
"What is it?" Juliet asked.
"It's an EMP generator." Sayid said.
"What the hell is an EMP?" Frank and Sawyer asked simultaneously, eyeing each other suspiciously once they realized they asked the same question with the same bothered tenor.
"An Electromagnetic Pulse. It's a burst of electromagnetic energy that's designed to knock out all electronic devices for miles depending on the source. We used a similar gadget during the war to disable enemy communication technology. It wasn't nearly as sophisticated as this, but it got the job done."
"Sophisticated?" Juliet asked.
"It's specially designed to create a catastrophic blackout that could last from minutes to hours, and stretch for up to twenty miles." Sayid explained. Specially designed for what? He asked himself. He eyed Juliet. "Why would Jack have this?"
Juliet shrugged. "I have no idea. All I know is that Faraday was pretty concerned about getting it to him."
"Who is Faraday?" Sawyer asked.
"He's a physicist and a friend." Frank spoke up.
"He came to me and told me that he had a way to get Jack back to the Island. He said he'd been here before." Juliet added.
"Yeah, and it turned him inside out. He used to go on field ops all the time here, and I'd fly him, but once his girlfriend was killed and he nearly died himsel—"
"So, you've been here before too?" Sayid interrupted.
"What's with everybody asking me that?" Frank bristled. "Yeah, I have. I worked for his mother, but I got out, and I made it an important point to never sign up for the Dharma Initiative."
Juliet, Sawyer and Sayid wore confused and startled faces. "Wait, you know about the Dharma Initiative?"
"Yeah. It was some science brigade that Da—, erm, Faraday, headed up for awhile. What about it?"
"We found an underground bunker that belonged to 'em. It imploded onto itself awhile back. Hell, they still make these large supply drops a few clicks from our camp, like clockwork." Sawyer said.
"The Swan Hatch wasn't their only station. They have them set up all over the Island, and Ben operates out of their largest, the Hydra. He also has control over the Looking Glass station, which is underwater. That's where he's blocking the signal."
"So, that's why all I'm gettin' is static." Frank sighed as he pulled the transceiver from his belt. "Your old boss is a son of a bitch. He and Eloise should compare notes."
"Is there anything else I should know about this device?" Sayid asked Juliet, refocusing the conversation. "Were there any pertinent instructions Faraday left to Jack?"
"He said that Jack could only detonate it once, that he had one shot at it." Juliet said, unsure of what that was supposed to mean.
"At what?" Sayid asked.
Juliet frowned, upset that she didn't have the other piece of the puzzle. "I don't know. That's all I heard."
"This stays between the four of us." Sayid decided. "Whatever this device is supposed to do, it's safer in our hands, and we can hash out exactly what to do with it when we get back to the beach."
Sayid was about to move towards the treeline, when Sawyer reached out to stop him.
"Whoa, wait a minute. We're on Hydra Island, right now. This is where those bastards had me locked up in a cage and beaten within an inch of my life, and you think I'm about to just go back to the beach?"
"I don't know, James. It sounds like you have other plans." Sayid offered.
"Damn right I do. We can make it to the Hydra station within the day, take Ben and his punks out, get t—."
"We can't do that." Sayid said. Their united front was crumbling as Juliet watched their stubborn wills battle it out.
"Why the hell not?!" Sawyer yelled.
"Because this is not a revenge mission!" Sayid exploded.
He took a deep, long breath and explained as evenly as he could. "He had his security beat me into a hole in the ground, so don't you think for one second that I don't want Ben to pay for what he did to me, to all of us, but this is about getting us off this Island and nothing more. There is a chance that this device can lift the block on the signal, but it can also disable that plane and any hope we could ever possibly have of making it out of here alive."
Sawyer gave him a scathing look before storming off.
"James…" Juliet moved after him, but stopped as he continued walking heatedly toward the treeline.
"Let him go." Sayid said. He was accustomed to Sawyer's hot temper, but he wouldn't shift from his position. He turned to Juliet. "We should get going." He nodded to Frank before walking off.
"Lovely friends you got there." Frank quipped.
"They're not my friends. They don't trust me anymore than they trust Ben, and what Sawyer was talking about, I played a part in that." Juliet said, sadly.
"Well, it looks to me like you're redeeming yourself by helping them off this hellhole." Frank offered.
Juliet turned to him, offering a sad smile. She wouldn't count herself redeemed until each and every one of them was on that plane, flying away, and as scary as it was to have too much hope, she was starting to believe that it was possible.
Jack could feel the heat surrounding him before he opened his eyes. The sweat beaded over his forehead, and he found it hard to breathe. He eventually opened his eyes, slowly, his blurry vision starting to come into focus. Trees, high and mighty, swayed under a clear blue sky miles above. Too weak to move, he lifted his head as much as he could to look around. He was surrounded by bamboo stalks, shooting from the ground like rockets.
He heard something shift nearby, and turned in its direction, petrified. A golden retriever revealed itself from a shade of leaves, panting as his tongue dropped from his mouth. He stopped to watch, sitting on his hind legs, then suddenly, the dog ran towards him, barely missing his head before swerving towards the jungle, in a mad dash.
"Vincent?" Jack mumbled, confused as he let his head fall back to rest on the ground. He stayed like that for a few seconds, closed his eyes, and let his breathing level out.
A few seconds more passed before he opened his eyes again, this time, more alert and focused, panicked. He knew where he was, or more importantly, when he was, and he had to get moving. He rose, struggling to get to his feet, and once he did so, leaned back far enough for the stalks behind him to bend with his weight and took a second to let his headache stop pounding so loudly in his head. When the pain subsided, he stumbled to the side, but ultimately found his footing as he pushed through the bamboo, moving as fast as his legs could carry him.
The familiar sounds of screams, cries and coughs mingled with the overpowering stench of smoke came into reality the faster he ran, and only intensified the closer he came. Soon, the ground was no longer carpeted by dusty grass, but of sand, lit with unshaved sunlight, and framed by water that stretched for miles. He veered around a blocked corner and the sight was the same as if the crash happened just yesterday. Fractured pieces of the fuselage were scattered all over the beach like shards of glass, scorching with fire, as people weaved through the wreckage to find cover as the blown turbine engine filled the air with more smoke and toxic fumes. Shannon's relentless shrieking was like nails on a chalkboard, the perfect soundtrack to this horrendous scene.
Jack stood in silence, physically removed, invisible, but emotionally trapped, devastated by the mass hysteria before his eyes. Why was this happening to him? Why was he being forced to relive this? He stumbled forward, tears stinging as he watched the people he came back for, some long gone, suffer through their lives being turned upside-down. He took in the gargantuan nature of the damage, and how much of a miracle it was that the plane missed the water by less than a hair. How could they have survived this?
This new knowledge he held, that this wasn't an accident, made it all so much more disturbing and unsettling. How could Jacob cause something like this to happen to so many people, just for one person? Just for him? Guilt closed his throat as he continued forward, nearly tripping over pieces of the plane that were already sinking into the sandy floor of the beach.
He started to take in the faces of the people bustling around him, not even aware that he was there. Jin held Sun and quickly walked with her, no care for anyone else besides his wife and getting her to safety. Michael was crouched in front of Walt, who was inconsolably crying out for Vincent, in a desperate attempt to comfort him. He kept walking and caught sight of the guy that was trapped under the wreckage, still supine on the ground, tended to by others who were grabbing to get him up and away from the fumes. His tie was still in a knot above his knee, lessening the blood loss.
The wing had already collapsed, flames catching to it. He looked around frantically, finally catching sight of a very pregnant Claire, his sister, he now knew. She was sitting with Hurley, who still held to the watch he gave him, his father's watch, keeping her away from harm and timing her contractions. He kept moving and saw that Rose was upright, breathing deep and full, and helped up and ushered out of the fire and smoke's path by Boone, who was still holding to the array of pens he scrounged up.
He, on the other hand, was nowhere to be found. He hadn't stayed on the beach, his memory summoned; the adrenaline that was pumping had worn off, bringing focus to his injury. He sought privacy, but he wasn't alone.
On that thought, Jack turned his back to the beach. His movements were stronger, less sluggish and unfocused as he pushed himself back into the jungle, a sprint picked up speed, turning into a race. He prayed that he wouldn't go before seeing her, just one more time.
He rushed into a small clearing and stopped, pretty certain that he had no idea where he was going. He looked around, trying to figure out which way he went before, but nothing looked familiar. Every leaf, vine and branch resembled the last. He searched for clues, anything that would help. His eyes dropped to something shiny lying in the grass nearby. He bent down to pick it up. The Marshall's handcuffs. That only meant one thing: Kate had been here. This was quite possibly where she'd woken up after the crash. That piece of evidence fueled him.
He stood up, thoughts of seeing her again made him so deliriously hopeful, but it saddened him that he could do nothing but watch her. He could detect the bending of grass stems and the faint imprints of boots in the dirt below. A trail. He was no tracker, he never had to be with Kate by his side, but he had to go with what he saw, what he felt was the right way. He had to be twice as observant to find what he was looking for, especially when no one was looking for him.
He only walked a small stretch through the trail when he heard the faint sound of voices. "I might throw up on you." When its echo caught up to him, his breath hitched. He let air in and out loudly, his heart skipping a beat as he trampled through the path and turned the same corner she had when she stumbled upon him, kneeled in the grass and in desperate need of her help.
There he was, with her, without any idea what he was about to embark on with this woman and with this place. His hair was shorter, that shorn, buzzcut. It was so surreal watching himself, a grave sense of death passing over him at how alive and somewhat intact he once was. Whatever was happening to him was taking that piece of him, that large, important piece that hoped he could save everyone. He was losing that somehow, and coming back to this, to Ground Zero, where it all began, only reminded him of what was at stake. He had to figure out how to get to ELMA, and detonate it, or none of this mattered.
While his worries ran in circles, he kept his eyes glued on her. She was sewing him up, working diligently, but from his new vantage point, he saw the tears and unease in her eyes, but she kept going. God, she was so beautiful, he thought, as he let go of a strangled sigh. He remembered their last moment together, in the game room, and how he took the time to scower her face, to hoard as many details as he could. He realized that his memory paled in comparison to reality. Nothing was quite like Kate Austen, in the flesh.
"You're doing fine." He said, his voice shaky from the pain.
Jack continued to watch the scene play out like a movie, so distracted by her beauty that he found it difficult to keep up.
"You don't seem afraid at all. I don't understand that."
He listened to himself tell her THE story, and felt himself swelling with emotion, his brow crinkled as he bit down on his bottom lip to stop the tears. He shared, had given, a part of himself with her that he never had with anyone else. It made him realize that something was at work in that moment, something bigger than just passing the time while she stitched him, more than just distracting himself from the pain. He saw how Kate stopped what she was doing to listen, how her expressive eyes danced over the back of his head as he lost himself in the narrative. This was an emotional mating of some kind, right there. They were bound from the start.
He loved her so damn much, without fail and he always would. She was with Sawyer now, he swallowed that fact like a sour pill, but they would always have this, all to themselves.
"If that had been me, I think I would have run for the door."
He turned to her, shaking his head, "No, I don't think that's true. You're not running now."
Jack's eyes opened quickly, a shadow covering a good bit of his face from the sunlight that was pouring in, from…somewhere. He felt like he had just woken up from the weirdest dream he ever had. He was slightly shaking, and felt cramped, like he couldn't move any way without bumping into something. He felt tangled into a very small space. He could make out a roof overhead. His palm flattened over the ground, and it took a second to register that the surface was hard, woodened. It wasn't the ground of the jungle, but the floor of…something.
He sat up, and the floorboards creaked under his weight. He was, for the first time, indoors. The question loomed: where the hell was he?
His vision cleared and he began to notice some of the details of his surroundings. A rifle lay tilted on the edge of the small dining table, a backpack nearby. He turned and his shoulder bumped into a small end table, an object fell to the floor, sounding loud in the silence. He picked it up and was astonished. His watch, the one he gave Kate to hold on to, sat in his large palm. It was a bit faded, and some crevices in the linked band hid a few crumbs of dried mud.
He looked to the far wall. A bed sat against it, someone's small, slumped form carved under a thin sheet. The rifle and the backpack, his father's watch. It was starting to make sense now.
Kate?
He couldn't believe it. He had just seen her, ached for her, and here she was. This was another dream, another point in the past that he was forced to be tortured with, it had to be. He tried to convince himself, but…this wasn't a memory, he resolved. He knew it, he could feel it. This was right now. The tears he held in from before fell down his face, uncontested.
His pulse quickened, his mouth went dry, and his palms perspired. He inched closer, and saw her heavy mass of curls, covering most of her face as she slept. He was now on his knees, kneeling by the bed's edge, watching hypnotized as her chest rose and fell. She was alive, she was okay. His face broke out into a wide smile as he silently wept. He shook with…happiness, excitement. She was there with him, in real time and space.
Kate opened her eyes at the clumsy and then subtle movements around her, the clang that the watch made as it hit the floor broke through her subconscious, but she remained frozen in place until the perfect moment to strike.
Grateful that her wild hair concealed her face, giving her an advantage to react to whomever the hell had broken into the cabin, she slowly, slyly moved her free hand to the other edge of the bed and pulled out her handgun from under the mattress. She waited another second or two before she quickly shifted, until her back hit the wall and pointed the gun at his chest, obviously oblivious, but guarded, deft in protecting herself.
"Get back or I'll shoot!" She screamed, still half-asleep, and some of all of that hair of hers still covering her face.
Jack was pushed onto his backside at the impact of her swift moves, pushing the table behind him into a loud crash with the old stove, shocked at the sudden change of events. "Whoa!"
"I mean it!" Kate warned, shaking her head to free her eyes, but her gun was steady in her hands as she threatened his life.
"Kate, Kate, it's me!" Jack pleaded, staring down the barrel. He should have known better. This was Kate. No one snuck up on her, not even on her worst day.
She kept her gun steady, but worked to come down from under the fog of her nap. Her hair had finally cooperated, as her green eyes drunk him in. His hair was longer than she remembered, that adorable cow-lick in the front held a firm wave. That handsome stubble that fuzzed over his strong jawline and sloped cheeks was of the same rustic consistency, peppered with grey. His tattooes still travelled down the inside of his left forearm, bright and wild, more evidence to the fact that it was him. And those eyes. Those damn deep browns were still able to suck her in.
Could it really be him? No, she thought. No. No. No. She was still asleep, she had to be. Her ache for him was fierce enough to create what she needed, the guilt about what he saw of her was blurring her reality even more. At first, she heard him and now she was seeing him. She was going crazy. That was the only explanation for his presence here. Maybe Sayid and Sawyer were right to try to stop her.
"You're not real." The sad, broken tone, seeped through her cracked, scratchy voice, and it broke his heart all over again. Her hands started to shake, and her breathing grew more erratic.
"Yes I am, I swear." He begged, his throat closed at how scared she was, how unsure she suddenly was of her own sanity. To prove it to her, his hand came down to touch hers, still clutched around the handle of her gun, shakily. She felt him and in turn, he felt her, and it was all the confirmation he needed that she was real too. He let out an affected breath.
Her hands had stopped seizing upon the contact, but she didn't let up on the gun. He could see the shift in her face, her bugged eyes dimmed ever so slightly, her full lips parted. Her breathing was beginning to even out as she let herself believe him.
His voice was softer as he realized that she was starting to come around. "It's me."
She gasped. He was there with her, in real time and space.
"Jack?"
Hope you enjoyed it. Get ready for Chapter 24...