And so cometh the end of this Arc.
Also, I went back and rewrote parts of chapters 10, 11, 12 and 15. Enjoy. Personally, I think they're a lot smoother now.
In which food is a perfectly valid weapon, and Real Life is not that goddamn theatrical, kid! And buying presents is hard.
Warnings for blatant child death.
Part 6: Licence to Stab
The guards standing around the warehouses spun around as the expected explosions came from entirely the wrong direction. That was the first indication that things had not gone according to plan.
The second and third, respectively, were the barbed nets and fishhooks laced with dripping greenish poison tearing through their flesh and the massive scaly leviathans crushing them in gaping, toothy maws.
By the time the fourth thing, Wanitei emerging from the darkness still dripping with seawater, rolled around, they were all dead or dying.
Why arm themselves appropriately when you were under the impression that the enemies you were going to be facing would already be dead at best and injured and weakened at worst?
With whispers and nods, the armoured crowd made their way along the docks, shadows hideously distorted by the streetlights, towards the rows and rows of cargo freighters that even now began to bristle with the thugs Gatou had employed. Almost in concert, the Wani raised their muzzles and let loose a low, grating roar that shook the air.
As the crowd cowered, a large portion of the Wanitei unslung long narrow objects from their backs and, loading them from a quiver, fired the spear guns. They landed with a volley of thunks, some more meaty than others. Anarchy reigned, of course. That was the point of these tactics, not to actually take back the ships. To keep them occupied, split the force, leave Gatou himself and the bodyguards to Tsuri-ou-sama and Ane-ue-sama as well as the two disguised shinobi.
And if the hordes of Ani-ue got a free meal out of it, well, that was one less thing to worry about.
The collection of tuxedoed businessmen were the second to break out of the stupor of shock, after the Kiri shinobi. And Chinatsu just stood there, smiling wickedly. "It was simple enough to move the bombs from the compounded ships to your tower; avoiding entirely all the frustration of disarming them. And you're not the only one who had help."
At that, two Wanitei men extricated themselves from their brethren, crooked smirks on both. Rengetsu Houzuki narrowed his eyes, his senses picking up the layer of chakra disguising them. The Henges were released in a cloud of smoke, into Hatake and the Hatake Brat, who Komi and Mon collectively glowered at. But the Hatake Brat dropped another layer of smoke, doubling in height and resolving into a form that Rengetsu was more than passingly familiar with.
He was momentarily distracted by on of Gatou's samurai thugs pressing his katana to the Harbourmaster's throat until a trickle of blood ran down his blade and the room froze. Rengetsu knocked it away, ignoring Gatou's howl of reprimand.
"Ah, shut up. Mon, you get her out of here, keep her safe-" why am I sacrificing this advantage for her? Fuck, my emotions are compromised "-Komi and I will deal with this end."
Once satisfied that the blue-skinned girl had gotten the woman out of the immediate danger zone, he returned his full focus onto Hatake and the murderous Kaguya runt.
Sensing the break in the mood, everything erupted at once.
The guests started streaming towards the doors. Gatou's two men moved to intercept them. Komi dived for the Kaguya before he could warn her what he was. Hatake was- move!
Hatake missed his throat; chin ripped open. Is he faster than before?!
Brace and counterattack! Hit! Spear-shaped hand pierces lungs and heart...of one of Gatou's men. Substitution.
Means he's over there!
Viscous, jelly-like substance in his face. Kaguya threw food; opponent swap? Hatake's holding back on Komi, toying with her. Kill the Brat quickly!
Brat leaps on table, throws roast boar carcass, pins Gatou, shrieking, to the ground. That's pretty funny, actu- fishhook?!
Wanitei leader, right. Sword in one hand, fishhook kusari-gama in the other. Where's her partner- finally, cavalry! Gatou's thugs; ideal cannon fodder, keeps those two busy.
Kid deflects my kunai- finally shows those bones- returns fire with thefuckarethose? Firing his own finger bones?
Look up-oh shit they swapped again- sidestep fireball feelsearingheatonmyface Liquidate to negate kunai stab to the ribs.
Solidify one hand, Suiton: Water Gun. Shattered serving bowl. Substitution again.
"Gale Palm."
Oh shit, Solidify and-dodged!
Komi!
Nonono- Kaguya saved her?
Trap!
"Lightning Hound."
Glowing eye. Red eye.
White hot teeth.
ohmyfuckingkamithePAIN-
"SENSEI!" Snaggletooth girl shrieked. "You skinny pigfucking shitslug, let me go!"
"Your current argument is not very compelling," I chastise her gently. "And I doubt you'll be able to walk wrapped in a curtain and with grapeshot in your leg, courtesy of my homemade Exploding Tags, by the way."
"I'LL KILL YOU!"
Ow, that's loud. "Stronger people than you have tried, Snaggletooth. And he's not dead. Yet. But it's not like he can put up much of a fight at this point."
My scolding is interrupted, by Chinatsu walking over to Gatou, drawn sword in one hand and giant fishhook in the other. He's still stuck under that rack of ribs, by the way. But then, it being a boar makes it a pretty big rack of ribs, and Gatou is a midget.
She raises her sword...and Kakashi-shishou steps forward, stopping it in its descent. Gatou pisses his pants.
"Explain." Her voice is quicksand-cold.
"Kill Gatou, and an underling we can't predict steps up. Obliterate the entire company, and the smaller countries dependant on it suffer a collapsed economy and want revenge," Shishou states calmly, still with a wary eye on her husband standing a little way off, fishing spear held tight.
"I will have blood," she growls. "Let them come, they can send their warriors. The Archipelago will run red as it did in decades past!" Her tirade is cut off as Hakkai steps forward and lays a hand over hers on the sword hilt.
"My heartsblood, listen to 'im."
"Hakkai-koi, I-"
"Listen. Please. Times 'ave changed from t' Warring Clans Era. This will not 'elp anyone; I want 'is death as much as you do, but I cannot see you destroy t' economic world as we know it. T' battlefield 'as changed, 'asn't it, Lost One?"
Kakashi-shishou shakes his head ruefully, and I can sense his Trolling smirk under that mask. "I can't let you kill him, I never said you couldn't ruin him." He pulls a tiny storage scroll out of one of the pockets on his flak jacket, poofing a sheaf of papers from it in turn. "Gatou keeps extensive records of everything, including on himself and his transaction details. I'm sure that if they happened to be leaked to certain officials, he and his company will be stuck up a shit creek without a paddle. Enjoy."
He waved them away with a wide eye-smile, before turning back to me. "Any injuries?"
I shake my head. "Just bruising and some small gashes." He raises a sceptical eyebrow. "I'm serious, shishou! And damn; when did you learn to talk the political compromise talk?"
He shrugs. "Eh, bits and pieces here and there. Oh, and, er, well done. Your taijutsu forms were good." He awkwardly pats me on the shoulder.
Urgle. Blagh. Fmeep. Hatake Kakashi just complimented me, he said I did good, he thinks I did good, haaaaarrrrggggh…!' "Uh, thanks, Shishou. I just can't believe the fight's over so quickly."
"What were you expecting? A gruelling slog, hopelessly outmatched and unprepared, won only with brave sacrifice, motivational speeches and last-minute backup, finished with all-out flashy jutsu? Sounds like you've been reading too many samurai stories."
I laugh nervously, then realise something. "Shishou?"
"Hm?"
Gatou's still stuck on the floor."
"Excellent observational skills."
Snaggletooth picks this lull in the conversation to start shouting again, in exceedingly more profane language. Right. I think I've had about-fucking-enough of her.
Surprisingly, yet somehow unsurprisingly, it takes very little effort for me to pin her to the wall as her sensei did to me not so long ago. "I think you're misunderstanding the situation here," I say utterly calmly, putting just enough pressure on her throat that she can't quite speak. "Your sensei is alive. You are alive. But we have no reason to keep you that way. Even better, we have no reason to keep you in one piece. I might be only eleven years old, but I know more about pushing the limits of the human body that you ever will. So maybe, just maybe, if you sit perfectly still and keep your mealy-mouthed offal-worm tongue silent, you'll get out of this in one piece."
Obligingly, and gratifyingly, she shuts up. Or maybe it was something to do with the spiked ridges that erupted along my cheekbones. With a sigh, I drop her and retract them.
"The other kids you talked about were innocent. She isn't." Kakashi-shishou answers his own, unasked question. "Now, you should probably hunt down the Samebito girl and the Harbourmaster; I'll take care of the Houzuki."
Before I even cross the room though, a Wanitei shepherds in a pale and trembling Harbourmaster, a barbed net with Bitey girl inside dragging behind him. Streaks of blood decorate the floor as he hauls it along, the feeble twitching indicating that she's alive; but either poisoned by the hooks, in too much pain to struggle, or sensibly staying as still as possible.
Eh, I'll check on her later. For now, I'm going to scavenge from the buffet. I hope that blueberry tart got out unscathed.
Good news, it did.
Just as I'm stuffing a generous slice in my face, Kakashi-shishou comes over, ozone still crackling on his skin. "Houzuki's dead now. I was thinking we let the Samebito girl take back her comrades' bodies. The red-head knows too much about you."
I hastily swallow my mouthful, and shrug. "Eh, she's an enemy. I don't care if she dies, but I'd rather not do it myself. And I only said 'maybe' to her, so it's not like I lied. And I know you'll make it quick." I don't even need that much emotion-blocking Yang chakra for this.
He nods. "Sure. Draw up two body bag scrolls for me, though?"
"Uh-huh. Oh, and see if she knows where my stuff went!" He flicks an affirmative wave back over his shoulder as he stalks off. Now, to find some ink...
"I'd just like to thank the both of you for your help," the Harbourmaster said, much more relaxed now that everything was over. "If you hadn't been here, Gatou would have taken over everything. I'll make sure to send Konoha a bonus, on top of what Kou is paying you, of course."
Kou Michiro, our original client, smiled sheepishly at her and passed over the signed trade agreement we had come for in the first place.
"And if there's anything else I can do for you...?" She petered out, enquiringly. Kakashi-shishou makes to speak up, but I quickly butt in.
"Can I get that as an IOU favour, for the future? I can't think of anything specifically right now, so I'd like to invest it."
"Yes, good plan," Kakashi-shishou acknowledges. "For myself...Kimimaro, didn't you say you had shopping you wanted to do?"
Oooh...secrets. Ah well; "Uh, yeah. Meet you back here for high noon?"
"Sounds good. Walk around Henged and stay out of trouble, you hear me?"
"Sure, fine."
Hmmm...presents, presents, presents. What do I get for every one that'll still be in my price range?
Toshiki knits, so I can just get him some wool, that's him done. And Erumi mentioned that she wanted the new book in the Cloudfish series, so that's simple enough. I also buy her one of the Cloudfish netsuke toggles that are really collectable right now.
Yuyu and Itachi...are much harder.
I end up circling around the island and looking at everything I can see.
Think, think, think!
What do they both like or do?
Itachi does get cold feet; woolly bed-socks? No, too tacky and utilitarian. Well, I could get those, and another thing. Got to be personal, the Uchiha are pretty wealthy, after all, so a pricy gift wouldn't seem thoughtful. And it's pointless for me to make anything, it's got to be from Benisu; that's the whole point of a souvenir.
No ornaments, he doesn't like clutter.
Something individual and classy, that's more like it!
Something to make him stand out a bit, without being overbearing. A style change, as it were.
Clothing? No, too disposable and he'll grow out of it.
Jewellery? Mmmnneh...could be too much of a danger in a fight, and he already wears that heirloom tomoe necklace. Mind, his hair's long enough, which is a bit of a traditionally ballsy-but-true statement, since long hair is historically a shinobi dare of 'can't catch me, bitches'. He always wears it back in a ponytail though, and he get's really annoyed when people -cough- Shisui -cough- pull it out.
Right. Some sort of hair-tie. Practical, with a bit of elegance and something that marks it as being from Benisu.
...
Argh! I can't find anything that looks right!
At least, until I stop at a street-food cart and stand around to eat my massive nikuman bun and watch people walk by.
Benisu is an international trading centre, and there are plenty of people from the Old Continent. All the little countries are pretty insular and old-fashioned, and have to co-exist with all the territories of the Summon animals while avoiding the Primordials.
The point I'm trying to make is, they have a different culture.
All the men wear hair pins.
Not just kanzashi, either, but of every shape and material you could think of. Jewels, carved wood, metal, with tassels and plumes and strings, shaped like animals, some with blades... And while they're usually through buns, some are in ponytails or stuck into chonmages and cornrows and braids.
Okay. Now to find where I can buy one.
...
Oooh, they sell bladed ones in this shop. Perfect.
Now, Kanoko Dome are too fancy and decorative, and Ōgi are too rattly. Nothing sparkly or with a tendency to catch on anything...
Finally, I'm torn between a black wood Kogai with an inner blade, with a blue-black ombre tassel and chunks of abalone shell inlaid on each end; a simple steel blade with a round tiger eye stone on the end and a slender chain of small pheasant feathers as a bira-bira; and a slender sharpened bone made from a marlin's bill with a bira-bira of a rope of leopardskin jasper beads.
Hmmm.
The bone could give off connotations that are a bit too clingy, and it's quite expensive. I like Itachi, but I don't like him that much; 630 ryo isn't much, in context, but it's a day's food and water bill.
The tassel of the Kogai is a bit long and could swing round and be annoying.
That leaves the tiger eye and pheasant one. I check the price tag again. It's much less than the bone, about 390 ryo, but, yeah, I'm haggling. Or bartering could work...give me a minute...
"Hey, takumi-san. Bone costs quite a bit for you to buy, right?"
"Yes, it does."
I slide the kanzashi over the counter. "I happen to have a supply of bone on me. 80 ryo in cash, I'll make up the other half in bone. Fifty-fifty."
The old man stares at me with beady eyes that glint through spectacles under beetling grey eyebrows. "Ninja?"
"Yep."
"Let me see what you've got first, then we'll talk."
I reach into my sleeve and pull out the bone that's already protruding, ready to be pulled out. "True bone like an antler, not hollow," I say, as he picks it up and hefts it to feel the weight. "Perfectly smooth and straight, as well as a generous length and diameter. You'd be hard pressed to find bone like this anywhere else. I reckon it's worth about...ooh...250 ryo."
"No, I'd say 150, given that I need the plausible deniability. So that's 250 ryo cash."
I pull out another one, slightly smaller. "100 ryo, and these two. And they're not from someone that's been killed."
He shoots me a wary glare. "No stop talking; plausible deniability and as far as you're concerned, we've never seen each other before in our lives. Done."
I fork over the cash. "Done."
He wraps it in a piece of fabric and I walk out the door with my purchase. Mission accomplished.
Now, a pair of woolly socks and...Yuyu. Fuck.
Yuyu didn't show up in the manga or anime, I don't know anything about her!
Okay, okay, focus. That's not true, I do know stuff about her.
She likes bioengineering her insects, she likes karinto and pasta, she hates being stuck in a crowd, she has a rather wobbly sense of ethical boundaries, she thinks I need protecting, she doesn't like being controlled, she wants to be a frontline fighter.
And I've never, ever seen her wear jewellery or any decorative hair-ties, so that option's out.
I'm her Soldier, and I'm supporting her, so I guess I should show that support for what she wants to do. Insects, frontline. Insects, frontline. Insects, frontline...
Something useful, equipment. Something she can use with her kikaichu. Aburame usually carry around extra kikaichu in gourds or bags, but those are first things you aim at if you want to disable an Aburame. Armour? No, too bulky, she's only little, and I'm not made of money. A belt or vest, then, with lots of different pouches so she can take all her bioengineered hives around with her!
Yes! I can do this!
Now to look for someplace that sells something like that.
No, no. This is Yuyu. It needs to be special. And the material should be extra-strong, just in case.
I think I know just the thing...
Back on the Wanitei warship, I get my answer.
"We don' give our Ani-ue leather t' anyone, Bitesize," the Wanitei Prince-Consort says ruefully, in the midst of having a gash on his arm bandaged by an attendant. "Anyone. We go' shark leather, though, plen'y of it. Happy for you t' have t'at."
"Oh, thank you so much!" I breathe. "It's for Yuyu, so it has to be special, you see."
His eyes crinkle with a smile. "Ohhh…for a friend. I see... Well, le's see wha' we got...'
"Looks like you had fun," Kakashi-shishou raises an eyebrow as I seal a sealing scroll into my skin. "Have you got all your stuff sealed back in there as well?"
"Do you know how many funny looks I got, as a four-year-old buying things without parental supervision?" I huff. "I swear, if I get kidnapped by Child Services for 'my own good', I'm putting all the blame on you! That's if I don't get kidnapped and sold into some form of child exploitation first."
"Well, someone's grumpy."
"You would be too, if people kept thinking you were 'playing ninja' and asking where your parents were. And on that note, why couldn't they give me a forehead plate when I accepted the Apprenticeship?"
A horn sounds, and we start walking up the boarding ramp to the ferry. "They're made in batches, for the end of each Academy year. I pulled you out in the middle of the year, and they didn't have anybody fail or dropout last year, so they didn't have spares."
"Great; I have to wait another two months. It's bad enough that it's been two months of D-ranks and training since I became your Apprentice."
"Hey now, that's enough sass," he says warningly. "And you're gonna be stuck with me for a long time to come. Now, on the way back, we'll be going over Lightning Nature Transformation and your chemical reactions. Don't think I haven't forgotten those chlorine bombs you made!"
"Hey, it's one of Houzuki's brats!"
Mon coughed and spat up sand as she heaved herself up onto the beach, before strong arms took hold of her and pulled her the rest of the way out of the water.
"Dead," she finally managed to gasp. "I'm...only one...'"
"Your team was the one sent to Benisu, right?" One of the Kiri patrol muttered as he peeled off the chakra-sealing tag that had kept her from water-walking. "You had to swim all the way back to escape?"
"They let me go," she shook her head, trembling fingers passing over the waterproof bag with the two body bag scrolls in.
"You realise that means we'll have to take you in for Interrogation."
"'Kay."
Over Yagura's shoulder, Obito skimmed through the T&I report and the draft for an updated Bingo Book entry.
"A child? The fuck?!"
And so the Arc ends. But the repercussions continue.
Next time;
Interlude: Cat Eggs and Tall Tales