. A Story with No Name .
Sir Chicken from Noodlevertonville
AN – XP Yes, this is a stupid chapter. XD Took forever and it ain't that great. Just got bored while visiting family and this was the result. XP Warning – Read at your own discretion. Writer takes no responsibility for any outrageously massive drops in the reader's IQ. Read at your own expense.
Darkness lay before their eyes. Goku giggled as his body gently floated away from his chair, although his seat belt prevented him from floating away completely. Trunks and Goten squeaked and giggled as they felt this new sensation, and the two instantly began fiddling with their seat belts in order to fully enjoy the zero gravity. Vegeta growled and swiftly undid his seat belt and allowed his muscular body to float away from the group. Goten and Trunks continued fighting with their restraints when Vegeta snapped his head angrily towards them.
"Stop that. Just stay in your seats until the gravity comes back on. Damn piece of shit…already breaking down…"
He grumbled to himself and flailed elegantly (can you imagine?) until he regained his balance. He flew towards the door of the control room and pulled himself inside. The instant Vegeta disappeared behind the metal walls, Trunks unlatched the seat belt and giggled devilishly. Goten whined and flailed his arms by his sides.
"Trunks, get me outta here! I wanna fly!"
Trunks grinned evilly and crossed his legs in the air.
"You already know how to fly, Dork."
Goten whined again and glared daggers towards his torturous friend. He quickly abandoned any hope that Trunks would help him escape and started attacking the restraints tooth and nail. He finally bit through one strap that held him hostage, and he cheered as he floated up towards Trunks.
Goten used a small amount of ki to push himself towards Trunks, and he threw a vengeful punch at his friend's jaw. Trunks shrieked and tried to dodge, yet couldn't move quickly enough in the weightlessness of space. Goten punched him and sent him spinning away, who started giggling as he started spinning as well due to backlash. Goku had followed his son's actions, easily ripping through the belt that held him down, and giggled gaily at his newfound freedom. He slowly spun around vertically and laughed.
"Yeah! I'm like…floating!"
Trunks and Goten giggled at the oafish man's reaction and flew towards him. Each boy grabbed one of Goku's arms and started flying clockwise, taking their new prize along for the ride. This, in effect, caused Goku to start spinning, and when Trunks and Goten finally unleashed their captive, the older Saiyan continued with his swift twirls. He screamed as he spun, unable to stop himself and too confused to try.
"Ah! Holy crap! Gwaahh! Vegeta help me! I'm lost in a spinning vortex of evil, maniacal children!"
Vegeta pulled himself to look at the floating trio and rolled his eyes at the scene. He gave a bored look towards Piccolo, who seemed just as intolerant towards the immature actions as he, and spoke in a voice that held a little too much honesty.
"I hope you know that you have permission to disembowel them with a blunt object."
Piccolo looked up to Vegeta and smiled at the comment.
"I know, I just don't want to get my hands dirty."
Vegeta grinned sadistically.
"Darn."
Vegeta glanced back towards the three and rolled his eyes angrily. He mumbled to himself while retreating to the room, hurrying to finish fiddling with the ship's controls. Krillin laughed as Goku tried to fly in order to stop his spinning, only to slam into a wall. The action had stopped the spinning, yet Goku was now whimpering and rubbing the new bump on his head.
Goten and Trunks erupted into laughter, and in retaliation, Goku grinned evilly (or as evilly as Goku could). He flew towards the two, cackling maniacally (once again, as maniacally as Goku possibly could), and at this, the two children screamed and flailed in a poor attempt at escape.
Goku grabbed the two quickly and cackled while tickling Goten, causing the young look-alike to erupt in uncontrollable laughter. Trunks laughed and grabbed a spike of Goku's hair and tugged, causing the older man to squeak in pain and turn his focus onto Vegeta's only son.
Krillin's never-ending laughter increased and decreased softly, depending upon who was doing what, when his weight suddenly returned. The three children fell to the ground in a pile and each voice squealed in shock and pain. Krillin exploded in laughter and he held his sides, unable to regain his composure. The unintentional offense made by Goku was quickly corrected as the two boys trapped under his bulk began flailing their arms.
Their squeals and bouts of joyous shouts soon trickled to silence as Goku saw a pair of all-too-familiar boots appear before his vision. One foot tapped impatiently as he slowly pushed himself up and innocently looked up to see the angered expression that rested perfectly upon Vegeta's face. The Prince's arms were folded across his chest, and the glare he sent had a reprimanding air. Goku finally sat up and pouted towards the angered man.
"Aw, what's with you?"
Vegeta snarled and his glare darkened.
"Dear god Kakarot, it's not that hard to sit patiently in a chair for a few seconds."
Goku's pout increased, yet soon morphed to a childish smile as he spoke.
"Aw, c'mon Vegeta! We were just havin' some fun."
Vegeta rolled his eyes and gave Goku a very haughty look.
"You immature dirt clod. Now get up and collect the last few shreds of you dignity. Neanderthal."
Goten sat up and joined in his father's protest.
"Aw, c'mon Uncle Veggie-boy! We were jus playin'…"
Vegeta gave a look of disgust towards the young child. His eyes narrowed fiercely in anger.
"For one, Boy, you shouldn't take part in child's play. And for another, my name is not Uncle Veggie-boy. I'm not your uncle, so stop calling me that, you twat."
Vegeta pointed a harsh finger towards Goku's youngest son, glaring coldly into the innocently shocked gaze. Goten looked down to the ground, hurt by what the older man had said, and he nodded meekly in reply. Vegeta grumbled against his throat and turned on his heels, quickly walking back to the small control room. Goten pouted and glared cutely at the ground as Krillin walked over (having just won the fight with his seat belt).
"Aw…that was mean."
He knelt down in front of Goten and smiled a genuine Krillin smile. Goku scoot over to sit beside his short friend, watching his son's reaction as the bald man spoke in comfort.
"Don't feel so bad. I bet he didn't mean it."
Goten scrunched his eyes tightly shut and shook his head savagely before reopening his eyes with a calm demeanor.
"No…he did…he hadta. He never said that to me…"
Goku smiled and chuckled, plopping his hand on his son's head.
"Aw, Squirt, he always says that. He's just like that, but you know that."
Goten shook his head and looked up to his father through his eyebrows.
"But he never said it like that…"
Adoration fell across Goku's face as the bulky Saiyan leaned forward and gave his son a bear hug. He released Goten and smiled warmly towards his son. Krillin watched this with a grin on his face, but he quickly turned his focused back upon Goten.
"That don't matter. He's real stressed right now, I'm sure he'll be back to his old self in no time."
Goten looked up to the nose-less face and smiled meekly, nodding to show that he understood.
"Yah, ok. I guess that makes sense."
Goten grinned for a moment, yet soon remembered something that caused his mouth to fly open. He gasped loudly and bolted for the window. He pressed his face against the glass and stared wide-eyed into the speckled space. Trunks ran up beside his friend and watched as the small dots glided by the window. Goku glanced towards Krillin, who in return flashed a simple smile. Piccolo gazed towards the window as well and instantly became lost in the queer, captivating expanse of space. Vegeta walked back into the main room, about to say something of great importance (like always), when he saw that everyone was staring towards the windows, entranced like all were at the thought of flying through space.
He sighed and leaned against the wall, waiting with exceptional patience until Goku finally pried his eyes away and glanced towards Vegeta. Goku blinked, watching the blankness resting in Vegeta's eyes, and he turned more of his focus upon the older man. He took a few moments to ponder, curious as to why Vegeta suddenly seemed so different. It finally hit him and Goku chuckled softly in order to draw attention to himself.
"Man, it must be funny."
Vegeta looked to Goku, regaining a small amount of his usual anger.
"What?"
Krillin chuckled as well, seeing what Goku was talking about.
"Us freaking out about being in space. We must seem like a buncha kids."
Vegeta looked to the ground and spread a gentle smile upon his face.
"Not really. Everyone acts like that for the first few times."
Krillin grinned and rubbed the back of his head.
"He-yeah, I'm sure. So, where we goin' anyway? We left kinda quick, and I just realized that I have no idea what we're tryin to do."
Vegeta grinned towards Krillin and shook his head.
"Took you long enough."
Krillin laughed and rubbed the back of his head as Vegeta simply closed his eyes thoughtfully.
"I already said that I knew who took them, did I not?"
Goku and Krillin nodded, eager to learn their future plans.
"Well, there you go. There isn't much he can do with a bunch of women, so I know exactly what he's planning to do with them."
Krillin nodded slowly.
"So then…what are you planning to do?"
Vegeta sighed quietly and rubbed his head, mumbling under his breath before continuing.
"We're going to see if we can intercept him before he gets to wherever he's headed. He'll listen to me before anyone else, but he's got quite the start. We may have to work a…little bit harder to accomplish our goal."
He spoke with a tender sarcasm that hinted towards the understatement in his words. His gaze fell to the floor. Krillin watched him carefully.
"So, where's this Turles guy taking them?"
Vegeta closed his eyes.
"Frieza."
Krillin lifted a finger, pointing towards Vegeta coolly.
"Wait, you mean he's alive too? How's this happening? I mean, they can't just come back to life like that after all this time. I mean, the dragon balls can only bring back people that died within a year's time, and it's been like, 8 years or whatever since he was killed."
Piccolo looked up from his meditation, watching their conversation with wise eyes. Vegeta glanced towards the window as he began his reply.
"Like I would know how they bent the rules on that one."
Krillin raised an eyebrow, watching the prince carefully.
"Well…so how do you know he's even alive? I mean, I can't sense him or anything. Am I just loosing my edge or what?"
Vegeta's eyes grew exceptionally dark at this, and he sent a deathly serious look towards the bald man.
"I know he's alive."
Krillin lowered the opposite brow, narrowing that eye suspiciously.
"How so?"
Vegeta's eyebrows furrowed with the bubbling warning of a dormant anger.
"I just do, and if you doubt my assumptions, then go on back to your little planet and wait for your bitch to return."
Krillin withdrew at the cold lashing, and he looked to the ground thoughtfully. He shrugged his shoulders, showing a touch of indifference towards Vegeta's actions.
"Alright, cool it. I was just askin'. So what, we heading to Frieza's then if we can't catch up with Turles?"
Vegeta's face scrunched in anger, and he lifted away from the wall with clenched fists.
"End of discussion. You know what you need too, now look. Bathroom, closet, forbidden, bedroom, and captain's quarters."
With each quickly spoken word, Vegeta pointed to a different door, pointing out the entirety of the ship in a second in order to shorten the time he'd have to spend in their presence. The 'forbidden' he spoke of was the door that led outside, and at his restriction, the boys turned their heads.
"Why's it forbidden?"
Trunks asked his question with an angelic mask that covered his devious soul. Goten watched Vegeta innocently while Trunks pouted the smallest measure. Vegeta sent a deadly glare towards his son and snarled a response.
"Because it's the door that keeps us in and space out, dumbass. Just don't touch it unless I say so. That is, of course, unless you want everyone onboard to get sucked into the vacuum of space and drift, all alone, for the rest of eternity with nothing but condescending emptiness and death to ease your pain."
Trunks started blankly towards his father, a little shocked at the unusually cruel words he spoke. Vegeta lifted a hand to his head, rubbing his temples for a moment in thought. He sighed irritably and walked back towards the control room. He paused before disappearing, looking back as he sent a much weaker glare to the group.
"Now, just…don't bother me. Oh, and try not to kill each other. Food is in the closet, which should be where all of our supplies are, so if you need something it's probably in there. Just don't mess with anything you can't name, all right?"
He almost whined his final words, and with that, he turned back into the small room packed with electronics. Goku and Krillin glanced towards each other and sighed with momentary defeat.
……
"I'm bored."
Krillin moaned while staring at the ceiling. Goku sat up and whimpered.
"I'm hungry."
Krillin sat up too.
"You know, me too. Let's go see what there is to eat."
Goku cheered and jumped to his feet as Krillin stood. They walked to the closet, and Krillin opened the door wide so they could see inside. It was a small storage room that had shelves lined with bags and small boxes. The two gaped at the sight (simply because of their boredom) and slowly walked inside the hallway.
"Would'ja get aloada this? Dang, and he called this a closet…"
Goku gazed around the room in childish fascination, and Krillin chuckled at his friends predictable actions. Krillin reached up and grabbed a bag, pulling it off the shelf and opening it to see inside. He pulled out one of the many cans and looked over the label.
"Chicken Noodle soup. How's that sound?"
Goku beamed and snatched the can out of his hand.
"Perfect! I'm starved. Wait, there's more, right?"
Krillin laughed and pulled out two more cans.
"Yep. What, you think Mrs. Briefs is that stupid?"
Goku grinned a mischievous smile that caused Krillin to laugh. The bald warrior fiddled around the bag a while longer, looking at the different types of canned food.
"How many you gonna eat?"
Goku perked up.
"A lot! How many is there?"
Krillin looked up and grinned towards his friend.
"Goku, you can't eat all of it. It needs to last. Here's a few more, I'll only let you eat those."
Krillin threw Goku 3 more cans and grabbed one for himself. He chuckled at Goku's look of distress.
"Man Goku, I'll never get over how much you eat."
Goku's bottom lip trembled in sarcasm, and Krillin broke into a strong laughter.
"Aw, quit your whinnin' and help me find something to cook this stuff. Or open it, at least."
Krillin started rummaging around, sifting through the bags of food in search of a can opener and some decent dishes when he heard the sound of aluminum bending behind him. He whipped around to see Goku biting into the top of the can and pulling at the lid with his teeth until if finally popped off. Krillin's eyes snapped open, and he shuddered at the thought of teeth grinding on metal. Goku, however, seemed completely unfazed after the brutal use of his teeth. Goku spit out the sharp edge of the can and giggled at his accomplishment. He held the soup in one hand while collecting a small amount of ki in the other. He held his glowing hand just underneath the can and started cooking the condensed soup while it was still inside the can. The light from his ki highlighted the devilish grin of naïve origin as the can heated up and the soup within began cooking.
Suddenly, in the midst of Goku's sadistically contained giggles (bluntly put, he sounded like an evil elf), the paper label exploded into flames within Goku's grasp. Goku screamed and began waving the can around in complete confusion. Krillin jumped to his feet and began running around in circles, screaming like some sort of wild banshee, only to increase Goku's fear. Goku finally realized that he was holding a flaming can, and threw it into the back of the hallway. He then bolted out of the hallway, screaming all the while, and Krillin quickly followed after his orange–clad friend as he waved his arms hysterically around his head. The two began running around the room in circles, screaming and babbling nonsense. Trunks and Goten, at the older men's actions, unleashed screams of their own, and began flailing their arms around, instantly joining the mass of confusion and blind fear. Piccolo jumped out of his silent meditation and began jumping around the room, screaming in a demanding tone for some sort of explanation to their hysteria.
Their screams reached the sharp ears of a certain Saiyan prince, and at this, he jumped from his seat and dashed through the door into the main room. He soon joined in Piccolo's random bounces across the room, frantically searching for a reason to the sudden explosion of fear. Vegeta suddenly back-handed Goku as the bulky Saiyan passed by him.
"What the hell is your problem?"
Haste rode upon his voice as Goku squirmed on the floor before him. Goku looked up with pure fear glistening in his eyes, and he instantly recognized the offender. He jumped up and grabbed Vegeta's shirt, shaking him violently and speaking quickly.
"Oh-my-god there was a can and I was hungry an' Krillin was stupid n' I didn'do an'thin' bu'th' chicken noodle thingy like exploded and holy-cow-nuts-oh-my-g…"
Vegeta slapped him and grabbed his shirt as Goku began to pull away.
"Get a hold of yourself! What the fuck is wrong?"
Goku whimpered and pointed a finger towards the hallway. Vegeta snapped his head around just in time to view a fiery explosion blast out from the depths of the closet. Screams of surprise once more lashed out as the group flailed about the ship, flailing in the unorganized attempt at calming the flames. Vegeta lashed orders, calling for people to bring water quickly.
"You Dumb-asses, come on! There's a bucket under the sink, fill it and get your good-for-nothing carcasses back out here."
Trunks and Goten bolted to the bathroom at Vegeta's orders, while Goku and Krillin continued their frenzied flailing around the ship. Vegeta shouted towards them with haste upon his voice yet a dead calm within his eyes.
"Kakarot! Bald man! Quit screaming like a bunch of school-girls and go find some rags or something to kill the fire. Go!"
Goku and Krillin squeaked and ran out of sight just as Trunks came back carrying a bucket with his clothes drenched after spilling half the water on himself in the rush.
"Here, Dad."
Vegeta snatched the half-empty bucket and threw the contents inside the raging inferno. He looked at it and agitatedly threw it back to his son.
"Fill it, Boy! And don't spill it all over yourself, hurry!"
Trunks ran back to the bathroom as Goku returned with a massive bundle of cloth soaked in water and dripping in his grip.
"Here, Vegeta."
The saiyan snatched the fabric and lunged through the door of fire. The flames flicking through the doorframe died for a moment due to Vegeta's actions, yet a faint rumble gave birth to an even greater amount of flames. Vegeta quickly reappeared covering his face, nearly falling on the way. He landed and quickly turned around to watch the ever-worsening fire. He mumbled to himself for but a moment until Trunks came back. The young boy gave his father the bucket and Vegeta instantly grabbed it and fled back into the depths of the raging fire. He threw the empty bucket back out after a moment, which Trunks instantly caught and ran back to the bathroom to refill it. The flames faltered for a moment, as the small group watched in frozen trepidation. Suddenly a gloved hand shot out, the flames dancing across its pale surface with an eerie pleasure, and grabbed Goku by the shirt. He pulled the disillusioned saiyan inside and when Goku began screaming again, Vegeta backhanded him.
"Listen, Fool! Take off your shirt and beat the flames down."
He whipped around and grabbed the sheets Goku had previously soaked, and quickly disappeared behind the wall of fire that separated him from safety. He soon returned with a bucket of water and Krillin who held a pile of soaking wet sheets in his arms. Vegeta threw the water against one of the flaming shelves and threw the bucket back outside to the waiting boys. Krillin flung out the sheets like a net and instantly killed the flickering flames beneath. Vegeta pointed towards the door after seeing Krillin's actions.
"Get those wet again, hurry!"
Krillin grabbed up the warm sheets and jumped through the door. After seeing that Krillin tended to his duties, Vegeta turned back to Goku's consistent patting and smothering. Vegeta dropped to his knees and joined Goku's efforts, using his gloved hands to smother the flames rather then a shirt. Krillin reappeared through the flames and squeezed the balled up cloth in his hands, flicking the excess water around the area of most imminent danger. He then threw the wet sheets over a group of sacks that were burning ferociously and instantly killed the flickering fire beneath. A meek voice rose above the roar of the flames.
"Father?"
Vegeta, upon hearing this, dashed outside once more and grabbed the bucket from his son's hands. He soon dove back into the veil of fire and threw the water towards the most furiously burning sections of shelves. The action instantly quenched the passionate hunger of fire, and he chunked the bucket back outside. Goku continued patting at the small embers until the last had finally dissipated.
The three walked out of the smoking room and plopped down on the floor. Goku was shitless and held a tattered orange cloth in his hand. Krillin's previously new clothes were now burned and tattered from the constant heat. Vegeta, however, seemed almost completely unfazed by his deadly endeavor. Only a few tears and burns called claim to his outfit, and although he had used his gloves as the only protection against the fire, they too only showed the slightest signs of wear.
They all sat in silence as the three rubbed burns or scrapes and inspected the damage done to their clothes. Vegeta leaned back onto his hands and closed his eyes, still buzzing from the previous commotion.
"Ok…so, what happened?"
Goku looked towards Vegeta and tried to flash an energetic smile.
"Well, like I said. Krillin was stupid and gave me an exploding can."
Vegeta sent a weak glare towards Goku and diverted his attention to Krillin.
"Well?"
Krillin grinned, still greatly humored by the whole incident.
"Goku tried to cook a can of Chicken Noodle soup with his ki, but he didn't take off the label so it caught fire. He threw it back in the back and we came running out here."
Vegeta sent a glare towards Goku, who sent a playfully angry stare towards Krillin.
"Thanks ol'Buddy. Now he's gonna kill me."
Krillin chuckled at Goku's words, but soon silence at the wake of Vegeta's anger.
"Damn it Kakarot. That's it; no one can go in there without my permission."
He rubbed his temples and pushed himself up shakily. After regaining his balance, he brushed off his clothes.
"You better start praying that your stupidity won't be the end of us all."
Vegeta grumbled in a manner that seemed as though he was only mumbling to himself. He turned back to the dark room and calmly walked inside. The group watched him, yet soon pried their attention away. Goku held up his ragged shirt and whimpered.
"Look at this! Dang…it's ruined…"
Krillin laughed and pat Goku's back.
"Hey, you brought others, didn't ya?"
Goku pouted and laid his shirt tenderly upon the ground.
"Yeah, but I've only got so many…"
He whimpered again and looked towards the closet. Vegeta rummaged around the remains, grumbling and muttering ragged curses.
"I feel kinda bad now. You think we should help 'im?"
Goku spoke tenderly and glanced towards Krillin in question. The bald warrior just lifted his shoulders.
"I donno what we'd be lookin' for."
"Don't bother."
Their heads turned to the gruff voice in surprise, yet upon seeing Vegeta, they calmed. Vegeta glared towards Goku, yet soon diverted his anger towards the ground with a nasty little glare.
"Well, I hope you had fun. That little bout of entertainment cost us valuable supplies."
Krillin turned to face Vegeta completely.
"Like what?"
Vegeta glanced at him.
"Like food, extra clothes, tools, and God-only-knows what else."
As he spoke, he sat back down and leaned back against the palms of his hands. He let his head fall back, and he closed his eyes. Krillin watched him for a moment and looked to his own hands. He perked up upon realizing something, and he turned his focus back upon Vegeta.
"Hey, you don't look half bad. Hell, you look like you mighta just run a mile or something."
Vegeta blinked in quiet confusion until Krillin pointed at Vegeta's shirt.
"Your clothes. They aren't burnt."
Vegeta looked down at his shirt and wiped it off with his hands.
"Well, what else do you expect?"
Krillin chuckled and rubbed the back of his head.
"I donno."
Vegeta looked up and smirked.
"Well, it is a copy of the uniform Frieza gave to his workers. It's flame retardant and durable. What, did you think that even though they have the technology to travel throughout the universe, they wouldn't make decent armor for their workers?"
Krillin rubbed his head.
"I donno, I guess it makes sense. I oughta get me one of those…"
Vegeta scoffed quietly and gently rolled his eyes. He shot a glare at Goku.
"Kakarot, you ninny. Just stay out of there."
He snapped his head towards the two young boys, who were now snickering about something. They tensed at his action and watched Vegeta slowly lift a finger towards them.
"That goes for you two as well. Stay out of there unless I grant you permission. Got it?"
His harsh voice caused the two boys to recoil slightly in fear, and at this action, Vegeta pushed himself up. He grumbled to himself and turned back to the control room.
……
Several hours more passed, and the group's boredom reached yet another peak. Goku and Krillin were passed out on the floor, breathing heavily and making strange noises occasionally. Piccolo was still meditating, not having noticed the commotion from earlier, and he seemed like a queer statue of wisdom that floated magnificently in the corner.
Trunks moaned as he watched the repetitive dots of light glide past the window and glanced towards his friend.
"I'm bored."
Goten straightened up and whimpered.
"I'm hungry."
Trunks straightened up too.
"You know, me too. Let's go see what there is to eat."
Goten cheered and jumped to his feet as Trunks stood. They walked to the closet and peered inside the now partially charred room. Within a second, the two disappeared inside and began rummaging through bags in search of something to eat. Goten pulled out one of the many cans and looked over the label as a grin spread across his face.
"Lookie, Trunks! Chicken Noodle, my favorite!"
……
Must I go on?
AN – Ok, XDD can you tell that I was in a weird mood over Thanksgiving? Well, this is it. A stupid, pointless little chapter whose stupidity knows no bounds. XP man, I need a job