This is going to be the last chapter before the Epilogue. Sorry it took me a long time to finish this. I still have to write the Epilogue I'm hoping it doesn't take that long to finish it up.
Sw,
This part pick right up where the last part left off because this is more of the same chapter.
Chapter 8 Continued...
And that was something that Rhett knew he would feel for sometime if not permanently thinking about Scarlett alone needing him while he was off trying to rebuild his life in Charleston. Instead of with his family where he belonged.
Scarlett was tending to the twins when Rhett finally was able to locate her she had Gerry in her arms and if he had to guess Rhett would say that Cat must be asleep in her crib. While Rhett knew he and Scarlett had decided to fix their marriage he wasn't sure just yet if Scarlett was willing to share her room with him once again. So before Rhett could unpack his bags he needed to know which room he would be using.
At one time not that long ago even the thought of asking Scarlett if she wanted him to sleep in his own room would have been a burning point to Rhett's anger. But knowing that even if he did have to sleep there it would only be for a little while smoothed all thoughts of anger away. It takes time to fix things and Rhett didn't want to push Scarlett them getting their marriage right was to important to just jump into if Scarlett wasn't at the same point that Rhett was. If she wasn't he could and would wait for her to catch up.
Just watching Scarlett with their son took his breathe away all of her attention was on Gerry and how to make him happy. Her green eyes were locked onto their son's dark ones as she hummed to him rocking her arms ever to gently almost like Scarlett was afraid if she moved them to fast Gerry would break.
It was a bittersweet for Rhett watching Scarlett being the mother that Bonnie never got to know. The one that he hadn't really given her a chance to be for Bonnie. Or even really tried to get Scarlett to be for Bonnie. After all Scarlett did seem to follow his advice perhaps if he had taking the time to actually talk to Scarlett instead of cruelly laughing at her; Scarlett might have changed earlier.
Blinking his eyes Rhett held back tears thinking about what should have been wasn't going to change anything. That past has happened Bonnie was gone no one could change that but the twins were here now and they deserved the Mother, Scarlett was to them.
"Is Cat asleep already?" Rhett asked in a low tone so as not to startle mother and son. Scarlett's eyes slowly left Gerry's to look into the exactly same shade of his father's.
"Yes she wore herself out today trying to get your attention away from the other children. I'm starting to think that she doesn't like to share she cried her eyes out after you left with Wade, and Ella." Scarlett said not sure if she should have told Rhett about Cat's tantrum she didn't want him spoiling Cat as he did Bonnie.
"It's nice to know I was missed" Rhett replied dryly just barely willing himself not to run to Cat's crib to check and see if his little princess was calmly sleeping and not still upset. Since losing Bonnie, Rhett had gone over her short life many a time and knew part of what caused her death was his spoiling her rotten something he knew he couldn't do again. Yes he would spoil all four of his and Scarlett's children but not like he did with Bonnie the children would have to understand when "No" was spoken it was meant. That was a lesson that had cost Rhett too much to learn just to forget it now.
"Cat wasn't the only one that missed you Rhett" Scarlett admitted truly meaning it she could see Rhett trying to read her eyes to see if she was just flirting with him or it was the truth. Scarlett hoped that soon Rhett wouldn't need to read her anymore that soon he would just know when she was being honest.
"Well next time then we're all have to go for a walk about town together. I can't have two of my girls missing me now can I?" Rhett asks with a little jest in his voice and a twinkle in his eyes.
"I'm sure Cat and Gerry would enjoy being pushed around in their baby buggy. But I don't want Ella or Wade to think that you can't spend just time alone with them. You're the only Father either of them have even known I don't want them to think you don't love them like the twins just because the twins are your blood children" Scarlett said gently not wanting to stir Gerry as he had just fallen asleep. Scarlett knew Rhett loved her older children but wasn't sure where he felt he stood with them.
This was a conversation that they should have had years ago when they first were married. Just what were Rhett's feelings on being a step-Father to Wade and Ella did he just want to be that are perhaps he wanted to be more to the two children. Did Rhett want to be a Father to them as well as the twins? After all in Charleston when she had told him that he couldn't see Ella or Wade again Rhett was upset over that more so then just a step-Father would be Scarlett had felt.
Did Rhett wish to perhaps adopted Ella after all when she married Ella would change her last name so what would it matter if Ella changed it now to Butler? Wade though was a different story as the only male Hamilton left it was his duty to carry on the name. A duty which Scarlett knew the young boy took serious he always had. She just hoped if Rhett did adopted Ella that Wade would understand and not feel that Rhett didn't love him as much as Ella. Of course Wade was getting older as much as she didn't want to admit that he was almost a man really he would understand.
Rhett held his tongue in the past a comment like that from Scarlett would have set him off on a rant against Scarlett as a mother. Now though seeing her holding their son he knew she hadn't meant her words as a weapon to hurt him. Scarlett was really concern for her two older children. She didn't want them to be hurt by his action, thoughtless action like they had in the past. Rhett knew some of this had to do with how he had spoiled Bonnie to much.
"You're right of course I don't want Wade or Ella to think I don't love them like the twins." Rhett admitted. "Cat will just have to share me with both her brothers and sister"
Rhett was surprise how easy it seemed he readjusted to living in a house with young children again. He was in the study at the moment all the children had gone to bed for the night and Scarlett was trying do the books for the store on the other side of the room. In the last two weeks it seemed that being a Father was the only thing that came naturally to Rhett once more. Scarlett had been right though Wade, and Ella, did need to spend time just alone with him. Wade was becoming a young man now and defiantly needed a man to talk to and confine in about the changes he was going through.
Ella was still very much the little girl he had left over two years ago who loved him as a Father. Rhett knew from Scarlett's hints that she would like it if he would adopted Ella as his own. Rhett wasn't sure if doing that would in a way be trying to pretend that Frank Kennedy had never exist. Because he had and the only thing left of him happened to be the little girl that Rhett loved as his own. Would it be fair of him to take away the Kennedy part of Ella's name just so he could lay claim to what already was his title to Ella which was her Father.
Rhett himself knew if something were to happen to him today he wouldn't want Cat or Gerry adopted by another man and have his only remaining claim on this earth taken away. Still Rhett felt the need to spend as much time with Ella as he could and be the Father she deserved to have.
Wade was becoming a man and yet was still just a boy; Rhett found that he was hoping that Gerald would follow in his big brother's foot steps. But knowing both Scarlett, and him, Rhett doubt that Gerry would be as easy going. No Wade was more of his Father in his actions and yet Rhett knew that some of Scarlett was there as well. Because he couldn't see Charles Hamilton sending a letter to anyone asking them to please return home that he was needed.
For that was what Wade Hamilton's letter stated. A letter that his Mother, Eleanor had sent along with some of his other belongs for Charleston. Rhett had been shocked by the short really more of a note then letter.
Wade had said very little but very important words were used. Words that Rhett found even after already have returned before getting the letter made him wish he had never left Scarlett in the first place.
Thinking about the letter Rhett walked over to his desk silently searching until he found his letter under some of Scarlett's papers. Rhett hoped that she hadn't found it or read it. He had only received it that morning and Rhett hadn't had time to talk to Wade about it. And knowing Scarlett she might not see the letter in the same light that he did. As a boy telling his Father it was time to come home.
No, Scarlett would only see a child begging his step-Father to return to his Mother. She wouldn't understand that Wade was telling Rhett one man to another where he truly belonged.
Unfolding the letter having to read it once more just too much sure he hadn't missed anything the first few times he had already read it.
Uncle Rhett,
Mother has told Ella and I that we will not be seeing you. I know that things between you and Mother haven't always been good.
But I can't understand you're not wanting to be with us any longer.
Mother is truly sorry for all those times she's be unkind. I know she is.
We need you Uncle Rhett please don't abandon us. We all miss Bonnie too.
Your almost son,
Wade Hampton
Rhett knew Scarlett would never have told Wade of the troubles she and he were having but the young man had lived with them most of his life he knew things between them weren't right.
Wade was of course right as well even if he hadn't realized it at the time he had abandoned Wade and Ella. Something that only his time and attention to them both could make up for. Folding the letter again Rhett slide it into his coat pocket not wanting to risk Scarlett finding it.
Rhett planned on talking to Wade about the letter when the two of them were alone. Letting him know that he had been right in part that losing Bonnie had blinded Rhett to all those around him who needed him like they always had. That he become numb to feeling and almost losing his family finally woke him up to the fact he couldn't live like that any longer.
Rhett just hoped that the children didn't learn of his ill-fate engagement to Anne. At least not yet perhaps in the future when he could found the words to explain how that all had come about. Rhett though found he wasn't clear himself about how that did come about. It seemed that one moment everything was well normal he was married to Scarlett and the next he was supposed to marry someone else.
He hadn't really even asked Anne, it was really more Rosemary and his Mother that had taken the matter into their hands and just told him he was marrying Anne that he had to do the right thing this time.
Rhett did felt guilty that Anne now faced her good name being blacken but like the priest had said Rhett was married to Scarlett. Rhett knew he had never made any vows to Anne but he had to Scarlett. And those were the vows he intended to never break again.
Perhaps Scarlett and he should renew their vows start fresh and both of them mean them this time. He would have to talk to Scarlett about that.
Of course Rhett wasn't dumb enough to think that people wouldn't learn of his engagement to Anne. Charleston wasn't that far away the old hens would talk perhaps putting off that talk with the children wouldn't be possible. Rhett would rather they learned about Anne from Scarlett and he then others who would no doubt use it to hurt them.
The last thing Rhett wanted was for the children to be hurt by his mistakes. It was time for him to stop running though and just admit the truth answer any of their questions and let them know he loved them and their Mother.
On the plus side at least the twins were to young to asks any questions on this matter. By the time they were hopefully this whole affair would be forgotten. Chuckle a little Rhett shook his head he was starting to think like his Wife wanting to put things off.
"Rhett darling" Scarlett said breaking him out of his deep thoughts. "are you ready for bed?" the last was asked as she made her way to stand next to him.
Looking at Scarlett with that tiny smile starting to come to her lips made Rhett think that perhaps thinking like Scarlett wouldn't be a bad thing at times. He could think of all those reasons why they should talk to Wade and Ella tomorrow tonight was just for Scarlett and him.
"Now that you mention it my pet, I do find I'm ready to retire for the night"
The End.