Amity-Star: Hi folks! Well, here it is. I'll try not to make it angsty, although, I think I did. . .

Disclaimer: I own Psyche and the plot but I do not own Transformers Armada or Transformers Energon. Even though I have not seen it yet ((I'M DYING OF SUSPENSE!!!)) I hope I'm on the right track. . .

~^*^~ Here I Am: Part IV ~^*^~

The world was grey, a sombre mood for a late winters day. Alexis ran to catch up with Rad and Carlos but then remembered that they had soccer practice nearly all day and she wouldn't see them until their last period: Computer Studies.

She rode Grindor into the parking lot on the school grounds where all the bikes and other mini-vehicles were kept and sprinted into the large school, namely because she was late. Bolting up the stairs and towards her chemistry class, she ran into her home-room teacher and was face-to-face with the school principle in no time flat.

~Floating by the stars I picture them and us
It's not that hard to see
Our comets are colliding
Imagine you were flying
Imagine that you're here with me~

Alexis jumped high as a loud clap of thunder jolted her out of her thoughts. Her hands brushed the keyboard and before she knew what she was doing she had signed into her e-mail account and staring it dead-face before she knew what was happening. She was in her computing studies class at the end of the day and the two guys that she had come to know and love were wrestling over who got to hog the mouse and go into which *ahem* adult site they wanted.

At that moment the teacher decided to walk passed Alexis and frown, but completely ignored the guys' innocent looks. "Alexis, I would have thought better of you." She said as she turned and walked over to the other side of the class where the stupid people sat.

Alexis glared at the old woman's back and was about to sign out when Carlos pointed to the screen. "Ah, dude, you've got mail." He said as he opened his comic book and started reading.

She stared at him puzzled and then looked at the screen where a picture of an un-opened cyber envelope kept popping up and disappearing, the name and symbol clearly showed next to it. "Psyche?" she said as she clicked on the rose and star symbol and the e-mail opened up.

~Dear Alexis,

                I know you're reading this now. If that is true than I am gone. I am truly sorry that I wasn't able to say good-bye face-to-face but I hope you forgive me. It's just that I am so tired now.

                You have taught me so much during my short life. So many great adventures we had when we were young, and now ones where we can literally travel the world. You left many memories that I will forever cherish and share with the other angels here in Heaven. Like that time when we were four and we decided to re-paint your laundry room with the white washing powder when we couldn't find the paint. Those were really good times.

                You have stuck through with me through thick and thin and I have to thankyou from the bottom of my heart. There is a verse in this song that has kept me going for this long: 'I saw for the first time today. It's been so long I'd thought you'd gone away. And now I feel as though I've been here before. Once again my friend, I'll see you till the end'.

                Do you remember it? It's from our song, by Delta Goodrem. Here I Am. I want it played at my funeral. See to it that it does.

                You have been a sister, a mother, a cousin and a best friend to me and I am great-full. I thankyou and Optimus Prime for introducing me to the Transformers. Tell them, tell all of them that I will be watching over each and everyone.

                And if you happen to go into space, don't forget to say hi to the purple star to your left.

                Here I Am~ Psyche. .  . ~

Rad looked at the shadowed face of Alexis and knew something was terribly wrong. He watched her in slow motion as she signed out of her e-mail, shut down the computer and slowly pack her book-bag. And then as quick as lightning she had stood up and ran out of the room.

He had given chase after her, but soon lost her in the sudden surge of students who tried to escape from the school for another sixteen or so hours.

~Floating by the stars I picture them and us
It's not that hard to see
Cause our comets are colliding 
Imagine that you're flying

Here with me~

Alexis ran, feeling as though she would burst. Her head hurt, her heart pounded with pain and she wished with all her might that she was the one that was dead. She ran blindly out onto the road and stopped for a few short seconds.

Her mind flew around her, pieces of her dear cousins letter meshing into one big babble of words and sadness and pain and-

A piercing horn broke through her thoughts and three voices drifted to her in the un-canny muteness of being stuck in a trucks head-lights. One was Rad's, such sweetness and melodious could only drift from his being at a time that she thought was the end of her life. The other was Carlos', his rough Hispanic accent thick in the fog of her mind. And the other, even to her, was a shock. It belonged to Psyche. Psyche's sweet, angelic voice. Yet it was Psyche's panic stricken voice that seemed to break the trance-like state she was in and urge her to the other side of the wet and slippery road.

 And now she ran and ran through the suburbs, the rain starting at a drizzle when she left Lincon to an all out war of the water. Her breath was ragged and she had a suspicious feeling that Laserbeak was following her through the buffet of rain. She ran passed her house and passed the houses that were like mansions. Ran passed the smaller, more distant houses until finally she was running to no where exactly.

She hurt inside. She felt numb from shock and hurt. And for some reason rejection.

She finally slowed down when she entered the forest approximately five miles from the base and last trace of civilisation. She wanted to escape from the world and she finally realised that she was far enough to release her anger and pain. She walked out into a small glen and walked into the middle of it. She stood for millennia. She stood like that for eternity, her whole life falling at the seems.

Slowly Alexis sank to her knees, her arms hanging loosely at her sides, trailing in the mud, the water running off of her in buckets and melding with the earth and mud and soul. There she sat, silent tears forming to water on her cheeks before falling to their doom in to a big ocean of water pooled around her body.

She cried and cried, her screams of anguish going unheard by the world, the world not bothering to listen to the sadness of a child. To the anger and pain and misguided and miscalculated feelings of a young person. There she cried, her only comfort was the rain, cold and unbearable for a person who had a heart; the mud that caked her entire knees and legs that anchored her to the earth. Her heart was empty, a gaping hole to be filled but with no materials to fill it with. All Alexis wanted in the world was Psyche back. Was that just too much to ask for?

~ I saw the sun for the first time today
It's been so long, I thought you'd gone away
And now I feel as though I've been here before
Once again my friend

I'll see you 'til the end~

Hours slid by. What felt like days were mere minutes and hours, days. She lost all sense of time, but she still felt numb. Her throat hurt, her eyes felt like they would never open. Her life was gone, just like Psyche's light was.

"Alexis?" cooed a soft voice.

Alexis curled into a tighter ball, tears flowing again, the rain water snatching them and bringing them mercilessly to the ground.

She felt a warm hard touch her cold drenched shoulder, warmth spreading like a virus. She wrenched it out of Rad's hand. She didn't want the warmth. Her 'sister' was dead and there was nothing she could say or do to change it.

"You knew it would happen eventually, Alexis." Rad said softly as he sat next to her in the mud and cup her cold face with his two hands, turning her face to his. "Alexis, come back please. Everyone is worried sick about you." He asked. His voice was that of pleading. He was drenched also, his blond hair plastered to his face and head like nobodies business and his jacket seamed to have accumulated water, giving it a 'water-bed' look. He turned away, letting her face go. "I haven't told anyone. Not even Carlos has figured it out. I wanted them to hear it from you."

Alexis stood up and leaned on Rad for physical and moral support, completely drained, both emotionally and physically. They walked in silence until they reached the road fifteen minutes later and watched with belittled admiration all the Autobots in their vehicle modes either roar up the road or jet through the air.

"Alexis?! Are you all right?! We heard you run out of school and you almost got run over!" Carlos yelled as he jumped out of Optimus and ran towards his two best friends.

Alexis looked at Carlos and swallowed tightly, her throat feeling like sand-paper. "It's because. . ." She couldn't say it. It still hurt to say it and she felt convinced that Psyche would just hop out of Blurr or Red Alert or Smokescreen and say 'Surprise! Got 'cha!'. Saying it would feel like admitting the truth, that Psyche was finally gone.

Rad looked at her with sad eyes and saw the fresh wave of tears flow from her eyes and down her dirty, muddy cheeks. The rain had settled to a constant drizzle and he thought of it as reverence for Alexis's loss. "Alexis, you have to say it. You know you have to." Rad said slowly, carefully as not to push Alexis.

Slowly, the tears stopped flowing from the girl in his arms eyes and he heard a deep, shaky breath. "It's Psyche. . . She, she's gone." And after that followed nothing but silence.

~ Here I am this is me
What you get is what you see
Look around I am free

And there are no fears in me~

"To Psyche!" Optimus said a week later in the Autobot base as he lift a cube of purple energon. All the Autobot team stood around him with energon in their hands, so did the mini-cons. Bubbles, the mini-con that used to belong to Psyche sat a-top Optimus' shoulder and bleeped out her wishes and toast to her lost friend.

The mini-cons stood around the large empty room with the Autobot, on the cat-walks or on the platforms that the humans used as areas to rest and do their homework and eat if they stayed the night. Carlos, Rad and Alexis stood on one of the platforms, each holding a glass of Baileys Irish Cream that they had stolen from the wake at Psyche's house. "You know, this was Psyche's favourite drink. When we were younger we would sneak into her parents wine cellar and taste-test all of the wines that had the words 'test' on them. Then one day we found the 'non-grape wine'. Well that's what we called it. Ever since then we used to sneak down there when ever we got a good mark on a test or it was someone's birthday and such. But then she got sick and we never really got to drink it that much." Alexis said as she swirled the liquid in her glass around and looked at it.

She wore a long black dress with shoes that had small heals. Her hair was pulled back into a tight pony-tail and she had no make-up on. Due to the fact that she had cried through most of the ceremony. A sudden smile lit her face and she held her glass up in the air. Optimus had just finished his toast and was looking at Alexis. "To Psyche, let her light from her star never fade as long as we are alive to tell her story." And she took a swig of the Baileys and watched through her lashes as the whole room complied.

"To Psyche." Everyone's voice, and bleeping, resounded throughout the base as a lone, purple star seemed to burn brighter and brighter till it was the brightest star in the night sky.

~ Here I am this is me
What you get is what you see
Look around I am free

And there are no fears in me~

Optimus was back with them. Alive and well. Alexis was pleased as she looked out her bedroom window on the Axelon ship the Autobots had built and were now flying to their home planet of Cybertron. Grindor lay on her recharge pad along with Bubbles that had taken a liking to Alexis over the passed two weeks.

In her hands was a book that Psyche's mother had given to Alexis, saying that it was her daughter's favourite book. "Psyche would read and re-read that book so many times that I'm surprised it's still all intact. I want you to have it Alexis. I know how much you loved Psyche as if she were your own sister, and I know she would have wanted you to have this book. I found a letter on her table when I found her. It was addressed to you. She also told me, I don't know why I didn't see it, when I tucked her in to give you the book. I'm sorry, I have to go now. But please, take care of the book as you took care of Psyche."

Alexis's heart still hurt, but she knew that if Psyche stood right next to her not she would have said to stop crying and remember all of the good times. The good times. Alexis smiled as she opened the book and slowly took the letter out of it. The book itself was old, it's cover faded and peeling and yellowing with age. The pages inside were no better with smears of food and the yellowing of turning pages and dark stains that could have meant that this book was read many-a-time. Good old Psyche. Sure she was nice and sweet, but careful of her stuff she was not.

Slowly she opened the letter and read it. It held many memories of when they were younger and such. Many thankyous that Psyche wanted to be passed on to everyone. But the thing that got Alexis laughing and crying at the same time was the P.S that she had at the bottom of the page.

Then, she had a sudden urge to look out the window and she waved, mouthing a word that seemed to be carried out to the purple star to her left. "Hello Psyche. Miss you." Alexis said as she folded the paper over and put it in her pocket that was closest to her heart.

Above her in the clouds of Heaven Psyche smiled and turned to the other angels her age. "Does anyone wanna hear about the time when I got stuck in a tree and my best friend and cousin, Alexis, got me out?" She said as many eager nods and yelps of 'yes' invaded her senses and she chuckled. A small, sad smile graced her lips and she looked down at her cousin one last time. 'Miss you too cousin.'

~ Here I am this is me
What you get is what you see
Look around I am free

And there are no fears in me~

P.S.: Alexis, I want you to tell Optimus this from me. If they don't whoop Megatron's cans or if they don't kiss and make up, he'll be getting a visit from a hell-bent angel and I'll whoop HIS can good!

Here I Am~ Psyche
~ Here I am this is me
What you get is what you see
Look around I am free
And there are no fears in me
Here I am~ 
~^*^~THE END~^*^~

Amity-Star: I'd just like to take the time to say thanks to all of them who reviewed this Dedication Fic. So, here it goes. . .

Skins Thunderbomb- Thanks. I think you my first reviewer for this fic. I hope I put some humor into this fic for ya!

Flyby Stardancer- It's good to know that your grandma's okay now. Hope she feels better.

laura-sloan- My regards to your family. Take care of your mum, alright? Wishes to your grandmother and uncle and of course your mum.

Cobolt- Thanks for the review. Only I haven't seen ya on FF.net. Where are ya?! I wanna read more A Girl Transformed!!!

GamaFox- I bet God is looking after your friends right now. I also bet your grandfather is your guardian angel too. Oh, and your life ain't stupid!!!

MarinBlue- Thankyou for reviewing. I don't know what I'd do if my father died. Of course we don't see eye to eye but I couldn't live if he passed. My regards and sympathy. ((If you want it that is. Please don't hit me))

Moonwalker- Kind words. Thankyou.

Bloodsabre- Thank you and really sorry about not talking to ya in AGES!!! Gotta catch up soon!!

Nurannoniel T.I.M.E.- Well, I think you were right about the Kleenex box thing. I just wonder how many you eventually went through?. . .

Zammy- Here it is. The aftermath. Just sorry if I had you on edge there.

Honesah- Sorry Honesah, but no cure. I figured that, well, I know I'm going to get pelted by rotten tomatoes and really hot Flames, that she wanted to die to full-fill her life. Sorry bout that.

Alayea- Thank you for the review, it meant a lot. Every little word.

ckret2- Well, I up-dated and hope you like it.

Haley Macrae- You know as well as I that Bob Hamby is looking after you. Take care and regards.

Goldenkingcobra- Sorry about the sadness part and the angsty part. But, I think it had to be done.

Zeheria- Thanks for the reviews. It puts smiles on my dial.

Erailea Evenstar- Thanks for the review. But in the end, Psyche did get over the freaked-out factor and gotten her own mini-con and a whole bunch of new friends.

Talking Hawk­- Thank you for say it was a great story idea. I know it's not the best, or the flashiest fics here on fanfiction, but I try my hardest.

Anyone else that I left out, I'm sorry. But all in all thankyou very much for reviewing. It really made me smile when ever I'd go onto my e-mail and find lots and lots of reviews all for me!!! Thankyou all and *Blessed Be!!!

Dedicated to all those who have lost a loved one in any situation.