February 4th: 5PM

Isn't it tragic that I still sleep in my old room, I'd moved everything back in there, and as far as I knew; he was still sleeping with all sorts of different women. I realised he'd never loved me, he just wanted a wife, and everything had been an act.

Half an hour a go, I received a letter from him, telling me rather abruptly to go and see him at ten past five, today. So that is where I am going now.

February 5th:

I got into his office, staring at him coldly, and he started to speak, no greeting, no 'sit down'.

"I'll come straight to the point, everyone's been saying how horrible you look recently, and you're fat, pale, and quite frankly disgusting. I think you should do something about it before it gets out of hand. You may go."

Said just like that. I didn't move.

"You've hardly spoken to me in six months, and now you expect me to take this?" I said.

"Get out of my sight!" said Voldemort dismissively.

I aimed my wand at him, but he was too quick, and before I knew it, I was on the floor under the Cruciatus Curse. Through my screams, I panicked; if the curse is used on a woman pregnant then the baby will be killed. After a while, it stopped, but the pain slashing through my stomach was just as bad. I couldn't formulate the words to tell him that I was pregnant, I was just whimpering nonsense. He stepped over me, and did it once more, only this time I could feel the life within stir and move… I thought I knew what had happened… The baby was dead…

I let out a loud scream, and this time, Voldemort stopped instantly, looking down at me. I was bleeding from my womb, I had lost my baby. "What is this?" Voldemort gasped.

"I was pregnant, you've just killed your own child," I said, through my tears and pants. Voldemort fell onto his knees next to me.

"No…" he whispered.

"Yes," I hissed through the pain. "And you've killed me, as well; you're wife, the only person in the whole world that would have done anything for you! And if I live through this I should never look at you again, but that's the thing, I will because I love you so much!" I screamed at him, taking all the strength I had out of me. I didn't hear screaming coming from below me, just pain, something leaving my body…I passed out.

When I woke up, I was in our bed, with a healer leaning over me with a potion for me to swallow. I took it, wondering why I even cared anymore. My insides felt soothed, I was calm. The healer left, leaving me with Voldemort, and I was afraid that he was going to hurt me. He didn't. He sat right on the edge of the bed, and held my hand. I couldn't make myself wrench my hand out of his; I hated him and yet loved him so much.

"Why?" I hissed at him.

He looked like he was going to cry. "I don't know why, it's just who I am, I've never been loyal to anyone in my life." He paused. "I love you so much Bella, I didn't know what to do. I was suffocated by loving you, I had to get out, and this was the only way to do it."

"You could have spoken to me about it!" I snapped, softening only slightly.

"I've never loved anyone before," he replied. "Never understood it, but I do now. Now we have our child…" He beckoned to the bed next to me, and lying there, wrapped up in white blankets was a tiny little baby, pink from crying, and fast asleep, with a mass of black hair. "I only hope she'll forgive me for the way she entered the world."

I started crying madly, but I was happy, shocked and happy. I couldn't believe that she was actually ALIVE! I threw my arms around him, and kissed him on the lips. He totally kissed me back. And the best part was, he was smiling into my mouth, like he really wanted to be kissing me. "I love you Voldemort!" I said, into his shoulder.

"I love you more then you'll ever know," he whispered, and I think he might have been crying as well, not sure. "What are we going to call our little girl?" he said, after a while of breathing into my hair. I gently picked her up, careful not to wake her.

"Adrianna," I whispered. The baby opened her eyes up and me, and smiled. She liked it.

February 7th: 6:00PM

"You're lucky she survived," I said to Voldemort as we ate our dinner yesterday. Adrianna had been fed and had been asleep for nearly half an hour next to us, and Voldemort was sitting next to me on the bed. I didn't really need to be in bed that much, I was quite healthy, but it was nice having his run around for me. "I wouldn't have ever spoken to you again if she had died."

Voldemort smiled weakly. "I am glad she survived anyway. Bella?"

"Yes?" I said, swallowing my chicken.

"I haven't said this to you yet, and it's very difficult for me to say but… I am sorry. I hope one day you'll be able to forgive me." Acting as though he hadn't said it, he stabbed a potato and began to eat it whole.

I grabbed the fork from his hand, and put in on the plate. "I forgave you the moment you said you loved me," I said quietly, and kissed him on the lips, passion-filled and wonderful. "Though I might not forget it, and if you so much as kiss another woman again, I will un-forgive you."

"Does our daughter count?" he asked, back to the potato. He has a thing about them, they're his favourite food. I laughed.

"You can kiss her," I said smiling at him. He took our emptied plates and put them on the floor, under the bed.

"How are you feeling?" he asked me, sitting back up next to me.

"Stronger now." There was an uneasy silence between us. "Can you put Adrianna in the cot?" I asked him quietly. He nodded, leant over me and gently scooped her up into his arms, not waking her. He smiled down at her; I could tell that he loved her a lot. He put her into the cot, and covered her over with the cute little blanket, embroidered with red and silver stars that Shell had given me for her.

"Do you want to sleep?" he asked quietly, turning to look at me.

"Only with you," I replied, grinning at him. He tilted his head to one side. "Come here, please," I said, softly. Voldemort walked to me, and lay down next to me, kissing me passionately.

"What if Adrianna wakes up?" he whispered, pulling back from me.

"You'll have to go and hold her!" I replied, with a smirk.

Voldemort sighed.

February 9th

Adrianna got her first visitors today. Voldemort had gone to his office for an hour when Rodolphus and Shell knocked on the door.

"Come in!" I yelled over her screams (She does not like having nappy changes). They came in, just as I'd picked her up and kissed her on the nose; she finds it funny for some reason.

I gave Adrianna to Shell to hold while Rodolphus hugged me, kissed me on the cheek and told me how pleased he was for me. He wanted a turn at holding her then.

"I can tell he wants to be a father," I said smiling at them.

Shell went slightly red. "Maybe I should tell you both now that… Well, he is a father."

Rodolphus and I both stared in amazement at her. "You… You're pregnant?" he asked after a moment. I quickly seized Adrianna from him, as he laughed and swept Shell into a huge embrace and kiss.

"Uncle Roddy's going to be a Daddy!" I told Adrianna excitedly. She smiled, even though she could have no idea what I meant.

"And they said it's a 99 per cent chance it'll be a girl!" Rodolphus must have been really happy, because I've never seen him smile like that. He looked really gorgeous as well… Then he took Adrianna back from me and started dancing around with her and singing madly. Me and Shell were both petrified, and I was very glad when Voldemort came back in and pulled me into his arms for a good long kiss. Rodolphus had silently forgiven the Dark Lord for what he did to me, as he told me the other night when I'd gone to see him. And apparently he knew something like this would happen in the end.

Yeh, right.

It turned out that Voldemort had actually bought me and Adrianna some presents when he'd been out earlier in the day, which included baby books and toys, chocolates and a cuddly snake ("Best that she knows her house now," Voldemort prattled, as though she was going to grow up to be a Gryfindor) and plenty of other wonderful things. He's a good father and a good husband, now he knows how to handle it.

I love him so badly. Anyone else, and I would have let go, but I couldn't have let him go. Ever.

February 11th:

Voldemort must still be feeling bad because he organised a romantic candle-lit dinner for me tonight, just like the day after we first got together.

Adrianna loves her sleep, all she does is sleep. I wish I could sleep all day and all night…

"I'm willing to forget all this," I said quietly as we ate.

"I don't know how to act normally anymore," Voldemort said, even more quietly. "Not that I ever was normal." He shrugged lightly.

"Who of us are?" I asked. "Don't worry, darling." I kissed him on the lips. "I'm fine, you're fine. Adrianna is fine."

I took that chance to ask him about the necklace. I hadn't before, because I didn't want to cause any bad feeling between us… again…

"At Christmas, I got sent a present from someone called T.R…" I said, and then trailed off when I saw his cheeky grin. Yes, he sent it. "It was beautiful, thank you."

"How did you work it out it was from me?" he asked.

"I didn't know anyone else who's last name began with R." I grinned at him. "What does the T stand for?"

He was silent. "I've never told any Death Eater this," he said quietly. "So keep it to yourself."

"I promise," I said quickly. Technically, I'm not a Death Eater…

"Tom. Tom Marvalo Riddle." He glared at his plate. "Stupid muggle name."

"You don't like it, then," I said. He shook his head.

"No, I hate it, my mother named me after my stinking muggle father." He shut his eyes as he said it, and then half opened them again. "Bella, I-"

Shocking really, that he's a half blood. I didn't really know what to do.

I was silent for quite a while. Thinking. And not what my ancestors would have either, YOU'VE MARRIED A HALF BLOOD WITHOUT KNOWING! WHY DIDN'T YOU CHECK? I would probably have been blasted of the tapestry.

I didn't care about his blood; I understood how Andromeda felt when she ran off with Tonks.

"I don't care that you're half blooded," I said, in a rush. He raised his gaze to me. My tummy flipped.

Bloody thing.

Couldn't stay still for just a MOMENT.

"I should hope not Trixy," he said, and then I madly smiled and rubbed my foot against his leg. He hadn't called me that for over six months. His legs were warmer then normal. That was weird. "What?"

"Nothing, just personal thing I put in my diary." I smiled at him, sweetly this time. He laughed.

"I've stopped writing in mine." He was quiet.

"Why?" I asked after a while.

"Reading all the things I'd put down about you was difficult-" he stopped himself in a hurry. "I mean, I tried to write about other… people but… I kept writing your name, and in the end I burnt all the pages that you weren't in… Ripped them out…"

Ahh this was the conversation we'd needed to have to clear the air. I'd thought it might have just… faded slowly…

"Voldemort, I love you." I gazed at him, and he smiled gratefully back.

"I've never doubted that, even in our… Darker days…" He stopped.

"I suppose you could describe them that way." Neither of us spoke.

"Voldemort, please can you go back to how you used to be with me? It's just I…" What was it? What was wrong? "I miss the way you always used to tease me so much. You used to be horrible to me, and I used to enjoy it… You would make me feel special because I had so much attention from you." I felt tears approaching. "Make me feel stupid, and then make it up to me again by kissing me and holding me tightly to you, telling me that you love me really… I love it when you pretend you don't want me, but I know you do…" He was watching, his attention rapt. Interested. "Talk to me about your problems, though, I can't…"

Voldemort put one finger against my lips. "I already know what you want, and I swear; it's from my heart."

It would have ruined the moment if I'd said "Or what's left of it", so I didn't. But it would have been funny.

February 12th:

Oh my god, he was just changing Adrianna when I went into his office… And his DIARY was lying on the table OPEN in front of me.

This is what I saw.

What a mess I have made. I missed her so badly when she was gone, and now she's back again everything seems so normal. I like it. I have my daughter and my wife, and for once I want a family, I want both of them near me at all times. I love two people, and I've never loved anyone before. I must accept it for how it is, I love Bellatrix and Adrianna. My two little stars. I won't make such a mistake again, if I were a Death Eater my mistake would have led me to be killed, it was that big. I wonder if, in her heart, she forgives me. I want forgiveness.

I want to be loved. And I think Bella's the one to do it.

And then, doodled at the very bottom of the page was a little heart with TR and BR together forever.

That is the most adorable thing I've ever heard. But… I never read it.

He came in, and I had to pretend I couldn't find what I was looking for and that I hadn't seen the diary. He glanced at it, shrugged lightly and kissed me on the lips. "Trixy, don't you have anything better to be doing then annoying me and making my office untidy?"

I smirked. He didn't need my help to make his office untidy. "Voldemort, what have you done with my baby?"

He shrugged. "Don't know; I have better things to be doing." He absently shut the diary and shoved it into his drawer, and then looked up and winked. "Shell's with her, I said you might be a while."

"Oh really?" I asked, feeling very flirtatious. "I suppose you're too busy to make some time to have noisy sex with me."

He looked up at me, not moving his head, but his eyes. "I could make a little time."

I smiled a winning smile.

I was a winner at that moment.

There. Now, worship me for the quick update.

-Flicks hair-

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