Interview Transcript with Professor Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry - August 7, 1993
Allan McDonald (AM): This is Allan McDonald, the Magical Liaison with the Department of Education. I am recording this interview with Professor Albus Dumbledore, the Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, in his study. Professor Dumbledore, do I have your permission to record this conversation?
Albus Dumbledore (AB): Of course, Allan, of course. Our minds are but vessels overflowing. I often find myself using the Pensieve for the same purpose.
AM: Right… "Pensieve…" Well, I trust you know why I am here?
AB: Well, if I didn't, I would certainly be worried about the Statute of Secrecy, wouldn't I?
AM: For the purpose of our report, I will state my charge in full. I am here, as a representative of the Department of Education, to perform an accreditation survey on Hogwarts. Traditionally, schools in Britain are accredited every five years, but, as you well know, the Thatcher years were lean times for our department, so this will be our Department's first visit to Hogwarts since 1975.
AB: Has it been that long? My, I must say, the turning wheel of time is a magic unto itself.
AM: Right, well… er… since it has been so long, I want to inform you of the process and the purpose for this accreditation. We, at the Department of Education, take the future of our children seriously.
AB: As do I, my dear Allan, as do I.
AM: Well, we have been receiving some disturbing reports through the Ministry of Magic.
AB: Have you?
AM: Yes, parents complain of attacks on students, a school culture of favoritism, turn over in key staffing positions, lagging student engagement, and a biased school points system.
AB: Ahhh….
AM: Bearing these complaints in mind, we, at the Department, see fit to perform a total review of Hogwarts School. This investigation will look at four key facets of the student experience:
Student Agency;
Student Safety...
AB: Oh, trust me, dear Allan, all of our students are safe.
AM: Professor, forgive my impertinence, but didn't the school nurse just inform you before this conversation that a, what are they called, "dementor" attacked a student on the train out here?
AB: Well, that may be so…
AM: Let me continue…
3) Student engagement;
4) Teacher Performance.
This review will take the form of interviews, classroom observations, an accounting review, and a student climate survey.
AB: I think you will be quite impressed by the mastery you'll see from our teachers here. In the past, the hiring, supervision, training, and discipline of teachers has been at the sole discretion of the Headmaster. And trust me, Allan, it is a role that I take quite seriously.
AM: Professor, are you serious? That kind of hiring practice is certainly not up to code with current legislation. Why, how do you determine the quality of your teachers?
AB: Why, I interview them, of course!
AM: Professor, things at Hogwarts seem more dire than I first thought. There is no time to waste. Please take me to your records and resources. I need to start with a review of curriculum guidelines, scopes and sequences, and past testing scores to determine an educational baseline.
AB: Records and resources? Curriculum guidelines?
AM: Oh no… Professor, do you know what a lesson plan is?
AB: At Hogwarts, we leave the student learning experience up to the expertise of our teachers. The day-to-day learning is, as you would say, their domain.
AM: Are you saying you don't know what students are learning?, Professor, what about exam records?
AB: Why we didn't have them last year, Allan.
AM: Why ever not?
AB: Several students were petrified by a monster. But, you must understand this about magic: despite the trials, the tribulations, and the petrifications, there is no safer place than Hogwarts. These are normal challenges in our world, and we will do our best to prepare our students for that world.
AM: There was a monster? Professor - an actual monster? Sir, students cannot learn if they are in danger? That's Education 101!
AB: Allan, we are in no danger here.
AM: Then why are there DEMENTORS?
Interview Terminated. 18:29 PM