Prompt #39: Elliot realizes at Christmas dinner that Liv is drinking too much. He talks to her afterward and convinces her to take better care of herself.

Starting Over

~oOo~

Christmas Day was upon us. Santa had come, the gifts had been unwrapped, and dinner had been served. Everyone was gathered around the long table at Olivia's house, feasting on the delicious meal. Olivia came out of the kitchen carrying a bottle of Pinot Grigio. It was the fourth bottle of wine she'd brought out that night.

"This is so yummy, Mom," Noah exclaimed.

"I'm just happy to see you eating something other than spaghetti," she laughed, touching his nose with her finger as she walked around his chair to sit back in hers.

"Really, Olivia," Amanda interjected, "thanks for hosting. With this snowstorm, it wasn't really an option for me to go home to my family this year. I'm grateful for your hospitality."

Olivia blushed as she finished the wine in her glass and went to pour herself another. She didn't want to dwell on the fact that she had no family to spend the holidays with other than Noah. Not that he wasn't enough.

Luckily, Amanda's daughter Jesse changed the subject to presents, which the others happily joined in on, to Olivia's relief. She believed Christmas was more for the kids anyways and wanted to make sure they had the best experience possible, unlike what she went through as a child.

The night went on and everyone seemed to have a good time. Everyone said their goodbyes and Olivia put Noah to bed.

As the guests trickled out, Elliot joined Olivia in the kitchen to help with the dishes. He noticed her downing the last of another bottle of wine.

"Liv, how much have you had to drink tonight," he asked, genuinely concerned. It dawned on him that he couldn't remember a time that evening that she hadn't had a drink in her hand.

"I don't know," she replied, slurring her words a bit. "Elliot, I'm fine," she assured him. "Here," she offered, "have some Sangria." She went to open the new bottle she'd just grabbed as he took it out of her hand.

"Like hell you are," he said under his breath. "No more, Liv." He gave her a stern look that said he meant business.

He put the bottle back where she'd gotten it from and peeked out into the other room to make sure they were alone.

"I am worried about you, Olivia," he admitted. "You are partaking in some reckless behaviors."

She put down the dishtowel and turned abruptly to face him. "I am not a child so please stop treating me like one," she snapped.

"No, you're not, but you do have a child who needs you, and he needs his mother sober," he pointed out, raising his eyebrows. "Do you remember how it felt to have a mother who's an alcoholic?"

"I am not abusing my son," she cried, putting her hands up to hit him in the chest.

Elliot grabbed her hands and pushed them together, holding them to his chest. "No, you're not… yet," he agreed, "but you also aren't making him your priority when you turn to alcohol. You know how that feels, Liv. Please get help now, before it's too late."

She sighed and hung her head in shame, looking at the floor. She stayed silent.

"If you won't do it for yourself, then do it for Noah. You can't let him lose another mother, Liv," Elliott whispered. He gently kissed her hands and let them go.

"Elliot, I want to but I don't know how." She looked into his eyes. "It's the only way I know how to numb the pain." Her words were barely audible.

"When did this start?" His eyes searched her face, trying to figure out what had been bothering her.

More guilt hit her as she spoke. "Around the time you told me the truth about the letter."

"Liv, what?" He couldn't believe what he was hearing. "You started drinking because of me?" He felt like he'd hit a brick wall.

"No, I mean… Elliot, you left me without a word. You were the only person I still had in my life that I could trust." The last thing she wanted was for him to feel like this was his fault. She took full responsibility for her own poor choices. She was still holding a grudge though, and her next words came out more accusing than she intended them to be. "I finally learned how to move on and then you reappeared and confessed your love for me… while under the influence. I couldn't take it. I've been through the wringer and it all became too much." Crocodile tears threatened to fall from her beautiful brown eyes.

"Liv, I may have been under the influence that night," he agreed, "but I meant every word." He hoped this wouldn't set her off again. He leaned into her ear and whispered, huskily, "I did write in an alternative universe, it will always be you and I," he paused, taking a breath, "and I still believe it."

The tears fell as her hands swung around his neck and she held onto him tightly. He tried to comfort her by shushing her sobs and rubbing her hair. He knew she was a little tipsy but sober enough to comprehend everything that was happening. She'd clearly built her tolerance up over the months.

When she finally settled down and pulled back, he put his hands on her cheeks and wiped her tears off with the pads of his thumbs. "You know," he began again, "a lot has happened since that letter was written. Why don't we start fresh?"

"I think I'd like that." She smiled through her swollen eyes and puffy cheeks, sniffling.

"Ok, but you've got to start taking better care of yourself," he warned. "You are one of the most important people in my life and I can't bear to see you on a downhill spiral."

She nodded. "Only if you promise to take care of yourself as well," she responded. "Oh, and not to leave me again without an explanation," she added.

"Deal," he agreed. "We're gonna help each other through this. Now let's get you to bed and in the morning we'll talk to Amanda about getting you into an AA meeting."

She smiled at him. "Merry Christmas, El."

"Merry Christmas, Liv," he replied, kissing her lips softly.

He put his arm around her shoulder and they walked arm in arm to the bedroom, abandoning the rest of the dishes until morning.

It turned out to be the best Christmas she'd ever had. It was full of joy and hope.